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wifes blessing

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

So for a couple of years now wife has no interest in sex. Been to doctor etc. Doesnt realy bother her as she says she has no urge to have sex so doesnt get frustrated like I do.

Every other aspect of our marriage is great

I was talking to her about it tonight. She says she gets where im comeing from but she has tried everything and doesnt change how she feels. She said I should go and get it another way. I said how do you mean. She said take it how you want to take it I dont know eny diffrent.

enyone ever been in a similar situation that has advice.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good like friend, but I think you've picked the wrong crowd to ask, believe you me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

For sure. It sounds like ive just made it up. But I am genuine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you think she mean't it, or do you think she was telling you what you were hoping to hear and secretly she's thinking to herself "if his cock goes near another woman i'm going to break it off".

A bit like when you ask the woman in your life "what's wrong?" And she says "i'm fine"...

You know she isn't fine at all. She's about to blow her top.

We are complex creatures....never assume the answer we give/imply is how we really feel.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"For sure. It sounds like ive just made it up. But I am genuine."

As I meant to say, Good Luck because it's not an easy honest boat to be in on here, I know with bitter experience!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Do you think she mean't it, or do you think she was telling you what you were hoping to hear and secretly she's thinking to herself "if his cock goes near another woman i'm going to break it off".

A bit like when you ask the woman in your life "what's wrong?" And she says "i'm fine"...

You know she isn't fine at all. She's about to

blow her top. Thanks for your advice I was worried people would be funny about it and think I wasnt serious.

We are complex creatures....never assume the answer we give/imply is how we really feel."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You said she's tried everything. What have you tried? I don't want this to sound like I'm putting you down or having a go, but try going back to where it all began, do the things you did when you first got together and couldn't keep your hands off each other, get that spark back into the relationship. Romantic meals, nice picnics and long walks, the coast for a fish and chips, what ever she likes to do, make it about her and not about sex and sure she'll get back into the swing of things. Remind her why she was attracted to you in the first place. Going elsewhere for sex should be beyond a last resort

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"You said she's tried everything. What have you tried? I don't want this to sound like I'm putting you down or having a go, but try going back to where it all began, do the things you did when you first got together and couldn't keep your hands off each other, get that spark back into the relationship. Romantic meals, nice picnics and long walks, the coast for a fish and chips, what ever she likes to do, make it about her and not about sex and sure she'll get back into the swing of things. Remind her why she was attracted to you in the first place. Going elsewhere for sex should be beyond a last resort"

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"You said she's tried everything. What have you tried? I don't want this to sound like I'm putting you down or having a go, but try going back to where it all began, do the things you did when you first got together and couldn't keep your hands off each other, get that spark back into the relationship. Romantic meals, nice picnics and long walks, the coast for a fish and chips, what ever she likes to do, make it about her and not about

sex and sure she'll get back into the swing of things. Remind her why she was attracted to you in the first place. Going elsewhere for sex should be beyond a last resort"
thanks done loads of romantic stuff nights away etc could have a realy nice day/night out then we head back to hotel me thinking cant wait to get her to bed. But that doesmt enter her mind and she gets her pjs on and puts tello on.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"You said she's tried everything. What have you tried? I don't want this to sound like I'm putting you down or having a go, but try going back to where it all began, do the things you did when you first got together and couldn't keep your hands off each other, get that spark back into the relationship. Romantic meals, nice picnics and long walks, the coast for a fish and chips, what ever she likes to do, make it about her and not about

sex and sure she'll get back into the swing of things. Remind her why she was attracted to you in the first place. Going elsewhere for sex should be beyond a last resort thanks done loads of romantic stuff nights away etc could have a realy nice day/night out then we head back to hotel me thinking cant wait to get her to bed. But that doesmt enter her mind and she gets her pjs on and puts tello on."

Then just hold her. She will be thinking you are only doing these things to get in her undies, make these things the norm as much as you can. Once she feels there is no pressure then she'll probably be more comfortable.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So for a couple of years now wife has no interest in sex. Been to doctor etc. Doesnt realy bother her as she says she has no urge to have sex so doesnt get frustrated like I do.

Every other aspect of our marriage is great

I was talking to her about it tonight. She says she gets where im comeing from but she has tried everything and doesnt change how she feels. She said I should go and get it another way. I said how do you mean. She said take it how you want to take it I dont know eny diffrent.

enyone ever been in a similar situation that has advice.

"

so you have been on here over a year and are only now bringing up what to do with your wifes disinterest in sex?

good job you already had the account eh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You said she's tried everything. What have you tried? I don't want this to sound like I'm putting you down or having a go, but try going back to where it all began, do the things you did when you first got together and couldn't keep your hands off each other, get that spark back into the relationship. Romantic meals, nice picnics and long walks, the coast for a fish and chips, what ever she likes to do, make it about her and not about

sex and sure she'll get back into the swing of things. Remind her why she was attracted to you in the first place. Going elsewhere for sex should be beyond a last resort thanks done loads of romantic stuff nights away etc could have a realy nice day/night out then we head back to hotel me thinking cant wait to get her to bed. But that doesmt enter her mind and she gets her pjs on and puts tello on."

Get a telescope and a tent, put a picnic together and go star gazing. Don't mention sex, just stay up all night star gazing. If you need help picking a telescope message me and let me know

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"You said she's tried everything. What have you tried? I don't want this to sound like I'm putting you down or having a go, but try going back to where it all began, do the things you did when you first got together and couldn't keep your hands off each other, get that spark back into the relationship. Romantic meals, nice picnics and long walks, the coast for a fish and chips, what ever she likes to do, make it about her and not about

sex and sure she'll get back into the swing of things. Remind her why she was attracted to you in the first place. Going elsewhere for sex should be beyond a last resort thanks done loads of romantic stuff nights away etc could have a realy nice day/night out then we head back to hotel me thinking cant wait to get her to bed. But that doesmt enter her mind and she gets her pjs on and puts tello on.

Then just hold her. She will be thinking you are only doing these things to get in her undies, make these things the norm as much as you can. Once she feels there is no pressure then she'll probably be more comfortable."
honest I do loads for her.romantic things and just day to day things makeing her lunch etc. We snuggle up to watch tv. The doctor reckens its her up bringing as through her growing up her mum slept up stares and her dad on sofa as they stayed together for her and her sister and brother

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

You have a lot of years of marriage ahead of you op. Do you think you can both sustain your relationship under these circumstances?

I'm not criticising but do you see this as a long term fix?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"So for a couple of years now wife has no interest in sex. Been to doctor etc. Doesnt realy bother her as she says she has no urge to have sex so doesnt get frustrated like I do.

Every other aspect of our marriage is great

I was talking to her about it tonight. She says she gets where im comeing from but she has tried everything and doesnt change how she feels. She said I should go and get it another way. I said how do you mean. She said take it how you want to take it I dont know eny diffrent.

enyone ever been in a similar situation that has advice.

so you have been on here over a year and are only now bringing up what to do with your wifes disinterest in sex?

good job you already had the account eh "
its always been on.my profile description about it. She only just said this tonight

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Good point

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some people go off sex. For some the sex wasn't that big a part of their lives anyone. It's not always because something is wrong. I know women who do it just to keep their man happy and can take it or leave it. They would rather go shopping

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Yeah she would defo pick shopping haha.

it just gets difficult as sometimes I take it as rejection.x

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"You have a lot of years of marriage ahead of you op. Do you think you can both sustain your relationship under these circumstances?

I'm not criticising but do you see this as a long term fix?"

The more you feel it as rejection the more you are likely to resent your wife. All the while, she is likely to feel it as pressure.

I know couples with arrangements such as this but they have generally been together for a long time and agreed what the red lines are for the arrangement.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Basicly she said she doesnt want to find out xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're not much older than us OP, if at 29 our relationship got to that point I'd be re-evaluating if i wanted to continue, for me it's a huge part of the relationship, not just for the shake of a shag. But the whole intimacy.

Tough one to comment on really, as I'm sure there's way more to it than you could type out.

Good luck with things, we get once shot at life so make it a happy one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fair enough if she's ok with you seeing other people go for itt.

But if this jist happened tonight why have you been on here for overt a year

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP, it sounds to me like your both stuck in a rut. The only way to get out of that is by change. It's not healthy for you or her to continue as you are. You shouldn't feel bad for wanting sex as its a major part of a healthy relationship.

Yet your partner for unknown reasons is reluctant to have a physical relationship. You need to talk, seek help if need be. If not then I think you should go separate ways and not go along the route of you seeking sexual pleasure elsewhere. I feel this will only make you more dissatisfied and your OH feel less inferior.

Big hugs life's not easy but sometimes we have to do things that hurt

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By *xodussxMan
over a year ago

sheffield

Are you sure she is not getting it from someone else?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 05/07/17 01:20:01]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hmm you have been married a couple of years and already having sexual problems and your wife is ok with you looking for other wemon would love to hear her side to it, bet its totally different

soon as single male profile comes on forum giving it "the wife wont have sex says i can get it here" come look at me feel sorry for me thread it puts me off,no offence meant to you but we dont need your sob stories and we are not marriage or sex guidence councillors go get help and spend more attention making your wife feel special than someone on here you dont know for sex

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hmm you have been married a couple of years and already having sexual problems and your wife is ok with you looking for other wemon would love to hear her side to it, bet its totally different

soon as single male profile comes on forum giving it "the wife wont have sex says i can get it here" come look at me feel sorry for me thread it puts me off,no offence meant to you but we dont need your sob stories and we are not marriage or sex guidence councillors go get help and spend more attention making your wife feel special than someone on here you dont know for sex"

I said exactly the same above but in a different way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hmm you have been married a couple of years and already having sexual problems and your wife is ok with you looking for other wemon would love to hear her side to it, bet its totally different

soon as single male profile comes on forum giving it "the wife wont have sex says i can get it here" come look at me feel sorry for me thread it puts me off,no offence meant to you but we dont need your sob stories and we are not marriage or sex guidence councillors go get help and spend more attention making your wife feel special than someone on here you dont know for sex"

And yet when a woman comes on here making the same thread with the same issues.

There's a million and one couples willing to be thier shoulder to cry on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your only 29 been only been married a couple of years we're on here as a couple but now suddenly your wife doesn't want sex. For someone so active to go off sex so quickly I'd say there's more to it than her past. Its surprising how many men say there wife's aren't interested in sex that's why there on here. Yet I'm sure there would be a different story from the wife's.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Your only 29 been only been married a couple of years we're on here as a couple but now suddenly your wife doesn't want sex. For someone so active to go off sex so quickly I'd say there's more to it than her past. Its surprising how many men say there wife's aren't interested in sex that's why there on here. Yet I'm sure there would be a different story from the wife's. "

Suddenly!?

He says its been a couple of years since she went off it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hey some just dont like sex my ex was like that had no need for it loved a cuddle but that was it

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By *adja_lazloCouple
over a year ago

Solihull


"So for a couple of years now wife has no interest in sex. Been to doctor etc. Doesnt realy bother her as she says she has no urge to have sex so doesnt get frustrated like I do.

Every other aspect of our marriage is great

I was talking to her about it tonight. She says she gets where im comeing from but she has tried everything and doesnt change how she feels. She said I should go and get it another way. I said how do you mean. She said take it how you want to take it I dont know eny diffrent.

enyone ever been in a similar situation that has advice.

"

here we go again, 'my wife . . . ' heard it all before

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

This is what ruins this site so many fakes putting up stuff like this. That when a genuine person actually wants advice and to talk to people about it everyone starts judgeing and presuming I dont try an make her feel special.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This is what ruins this site so many fakes putting up stuff like this. That when a genuine person actually wants advice and to talk to people about it everyone starts judgeing and presuming I dont try an make her feel special."

There's always a negative crowd in the forums, ignore them. They're just sexually frustrated and taking it out on other people.

They aren't all bad though. You've had some good advice too.

I think in answer to your OP you need to tread carefully. She may be testing you and not want you to find someone. Good luck.

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By *inkySlinkyCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

OP You have had your profile for three years.

Sally

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have you got children at all? Having young children made my sex drive disappear for along time

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By *rMrs CumalotCouple
over a year ago

East Mids


"Do you think she mean't it, or do you think she was telling you what you were hoping to hear and secretly she's thinking to herself "if his cock goes near another woman i'm going to break it off".

A bit like when you ask the woman in your life "what's wrong?" And she says "i'm fine"...

You know she isn't fine at all. She's about to blow her top.

We are complex creatures....never assume the answer we give/imply is how we really feel."

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By *imetoexplore69Couple
over a year ago

Aberdeen


"Do you think she mean't it, or do you think she was telling you what you were hoping to hear and secretly she's thinking to herself "if his cock goes near another woman i'm going to break it off".

A bit like when you ask the woman in your life "what's wrong?" And she says "i'm fine"...

You know she isn't fine at all. She's about to blow her top.

We are complex creatures....never assume the answer we give/imply is how we really feel."

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Have you got children at all? Having young children made my sex drive disappear for along time "
no children.

sbe says she has always felt like this. Never realy gets the urge for it.

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By *eady and Willing 9Man
over a year ago

Wherever the party is @


"Do you think she mean't it, or do you think she was telling you what you were hoping to hear and secretly she's thinking to herself "if his cock goes near another woman i'm going to break it off".

A bit like when you ask the woman in your life "what's wrong?" And she says "i'm fine"...

You know she isn't fine at all. She's about to blow her top.

We are complex creatures....never assume the answer we give/imply is how we really feel."

You just never say what's really o your minds which can be very frustrating and at times childish. But I'd try and talk to her someone and just say it. If she's not going to actually day it then you need to

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

So has enyone male or female been in similar. SitSituation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hmm you have been married a couple of years and already having sexual problems and your wife is ok with you looking for other wemon would love to hear her side to it, bet its totally different

soon as single male profile comes on forum giving it "the wife wont have sex says i can get it here" come look at me feel sorry for me thread it puts me off,no offence meant to you but we dont need your sob stories and we are not marriage or sex guidence councillors go get help and spend more attention making your wife feel special than someone on here you dont know for sex

And yet when a woman comes on here making the same thread with the same issues.

There's a million and one couples willing to be thier shoulder to cry on"
Cant really comment on that as not seen any thread yet by a woman saying her man dont want sex and her asking for advice but would say to her exactly what ive already said im not a marriage guidence councillor or a sex therapists im here to have fun not get caught up in some sex experiment xx

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By *adrMan
over a year ago

Near Bedford

Hello OP, Yes, I'm in a similar situation right now & have been for a year or so. If you are SURE she is giving you permission to seek elsewhere you could try, but check her feelings at every step.

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By *tongueMan
over a year ago

wrexham

Good way to divorce you and take all your money.

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By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke


"You said she's tried everything. What have you tried? I don't want this to sound like I'm putting you down or having a go, but try going back to where it all began, do the things you did when you first got together and couldn't keep your hands off each other, get that spark back into the relationship. Romantic meals, nice picnics and long walks, the coast for a fish and chips, what ever she likes to do, make it about her and not about sex and sure she'll get back into the swing of things. Remind her why she was attracted to you in the first place. Going elsewhere for sex should be beyond a last resort"

Lol the last line, you know this is a swingers site right?

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By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke


"Hmm you have been married a couple of years and already having sexual problems and your wife is ok with you looking for other wemon would love to hear her side to it, bet its totally different

soon as single male profile comes on forum giving it "the wife wont have sex says i can get it here" come look at me feel sorry for me thread it puts me off,no offence meant to you but we dont need your sob stories and we are not marriage or sex guidence councillors go get help and spend more attention making your wife feel special than someone on here you dont know for sex

And yet when a woman comes on here making the same thread with the same issues.

There's a million and one couples willing to be thier shoulder to cry on"

Men are supposed to beg and grovel for sex, didn't you get the memo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hmm you have been married a couple of years and already having sexual problems and your wife is ok with you looking for other wemon would love to hear her side to it, bet its totally different

soon as single male profile comes on forum giving it "the wife wont have sex says i can get it here" come look at me feel sorry for me thread it puts me off,no offence meant to you but we dont need your sob stories and we are not marriage or sex guidence councillors go get help and spend more attention making your wife feel special than someone on here you dont know for sex

And yet when a woman comes on here making the same thread with the same issues.

There's a million and one couples willing to be thier shoulder to cry on

Men are supposed to beg and grovel for sex, didn't you get the memo"

This needs adding to the site FAQ's

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