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Who's pissed on your chips today?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

The ice cream man pissed on mine. Imagine the scenario, its hot in the garden, the sweat is pouring due to the grafting going on. You head to the freezer for a refreshingly cold sweety treat. None to be found. Disaster!

You hear the familiar childhood tinkle of the local ice cream van, you run, grab money and leg it out of the house to find the fucker driving away from the end of the street at top speed. The utter bastard! Now I'm even hotter and sweater after the run, and still no ice cream.

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By *unforus1965Couple
over a year ago

MIDLANDS

[Removed by poster at 24/06/17 15:41:22]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nowt has pissed me off yet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nobody so far but now I need a wee

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By *unforus1965Couple
over a year ago

MIDLANDS

Two twat single guys who did not seem to have the mental capacity to read and understand profiles.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Nobody so far but now I need a wee "

Find some chips

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just myself today. Need a kick up the arse x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My youngest child? Late night last night and woken at 5.30am by child whining which had continued all day. Can't work out what's wrong. Roll on bedtime!!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Just myself today. Need a kick up the arse x "

Bend over, I shall polish the size 11 boot for you

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"My youngest child? Late night last night and woken at 5.30am by child whining which had continued all day. Can't work out what's wrong. Roll on bedtime!!!!"

Anything physically wrong or just bratish behaviour?

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By *ecretEscapes2Woman
over a year ago

worcester


"The ice cream man pissed on mine. Imagine the scenario, its hot in the garden, the sweat is pouring due to the grafting going on. You head to the freezer for a refreshingly cold sweety treat. None to be found. Disaster!

You hear the familiar childhood tinkle of the local ice cream van, you run, grab money and leg it out of the house to find the fucker driving away from the end of the street at top speed. The utter bastard! Now I'm even hotter and sweater after the run, and still no ice cream. "

didn't ya know .the tinkle means they've run out

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The ice cream man pissed on mine. Imagine the scenario, its hot in the garden, the sweat is pouring due to the grafting going on. You head to the freezer for a refreshingly cold sweety treat. None to be found. Disaster!

You hear the familiar childhood tinkle of the local ice cream van, you run, grab money and leg it out of the house to find the fucker driving away from the end of the street at top speed. The utter bastard! Now I'm even hotter and sweater after the run, and still no ice cream.

didn't ya know .the tinkle means they've run out

"

Nice try mum

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

I remember when my youngest was little that happened,she was so upset. We drove around in the car trying to find him,but after going back inside putting our shoes on then getting in the car and not knowing which direction he went in the bugger had disappeared.

She still remembers it now,it must have beem a traumatic experience for her

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By *yldstyleWoman
over a year ago

A world of my own

No one today

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Nobody...yet!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My youngest child? Late night last night and woken at 5.30am by child whining which had continued all day. Can't work out what's wrong. Roll on bedtime!!!!

Anything physically wrong or just bratish behaviour? "

Completely bratish behaviour. I am normally very sympathetic/ attentive, but she's rattled my cage today. Not sure I can take much more!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I remember when my youngest was little that happened,she was so upset. We drove around in the car trying to find him,but after going back inside putting our shoes on then getting in the car and not knowing which direction he went in the bugger had disappeared.

She still remembers it now,it must have beem a traumatic experience for her "

Does she still hold a grudge?

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor


"I remember when my youngest was little that happened,she was so upset. We drove around in the car trying to find him,but after going back inside putting our shoes on then getting in the car and not knowing which direction he went in the bugger had disappeared.

She still remembers it now,it must have beem a traumatic experience for her

Does she still hold a grudge? "

God no she's a teenage now there's a hundred other thing's for her to get upset/stressed/angry with nowadays

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Just myself today. Need a kick up the arse x

Bend over, I shall polish the size 11 boot for you "

I've assumed the position x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I remember when my youngest was little that happened,she was so upset. We drove around in the car trying to find him,but after going back inside putting our shoes on then getting in the car and not knowing which direction he went in the bugger had disappeared.

She still remembers it now,it must have beem a traumatic experience for her

Does she still hold a grudge?

God no she's a teenage now there's a hundred other thing's for her to get upset/stressed/angry with nowadays "

And all of them, your fault of course.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No one pissed on me today, but if there is a lovely lady with a huge tub or comfy shower, I may be swayed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So a social meet was set up for last night - a Friday night - in my mind best night of the week so you're expecting SOME sort of naughtiness right?? So texting Thursday night as usual when the 'don't expect anything tomorrow' vibe starts from her.... no biggie at the time but then Friday - NO contact all day till I finally text her at 18.30 saying if she's changed her mind let me know so I can make plans - anyway she said she's now working as she'd not heard from me (rolls eyes) so it never happened / and probably never was gonna happen!!

So i had fun with my neighbour instead

But that's ANOTHER story lol

Matt

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The 2 fuckers who phoned in sick and made me have to come to work abandoning my plans I was really looking forward to

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales

Kawasaki Heavy Industries pissed on mine, in the everlasting quest to make everything smaller & lighter you now need to be a winner of the Krypton factor to figure out how a rocker cover comes off.

Just give a wire another two inches or the frame another centremetre FFS!!

S

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"So a social meet was set up for last night - a Friday night - in my mind best night of the week so you're expecting SOME sort of naughtiness right?? So texting Thursday night as usual when the 'don't expect anything tomorrow' vibe starts from her.... no biggie at the time but then Friday - NO contact all day till I finally text her at 18.30 saying if she's changed her mind let me know so I can make plans - anyway she said she's now working as she'd not heard from me (rolls eyes) so it never happened / and probably never was gonna happen!!

So i had fun with my neighbour instead

But that's ANOTHER story lol

Matt "

Not a total loss then.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The 2 fuckers who phoned in sick and made me have to come to work abandoning my plans I was really looking forward to "

May the fleas from a thousand camels infest their underpants

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No-one has pissed in my chips today. But then, I've not left my house yet. .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But the neighbour was a first time (I only moved in May 20th) so now we have the awkwardness of the 'what the hell happened last night' scenario

No sex bit enough foreplay to make her blush I'm guessing!! Why is my life such a drama lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Just myself today. Need a kick up the arse x

Bend over, I shall polish the size 11 boot for you

I've assumed the position x "

Brace yourself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No one!

So far I've had a lovely day, spent with my son

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By *ELLONS AND CREAMWoman
over a year ago

stourbridge area

Go to the local super martket .. you will Get a whole box full for ythe price those robbing bastards charge for one .... or buy some cones and a tub.... so you can scoop it yourself ..

Whats your favourite flavour ....mines RUM AND RAISIN ... LUSH !!!

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston


"No-one has pissed in my chips today. But then, I've not left my house yet. .

"

Yeah but you've logged on to Fab that can be enough. I mean you should see what some smart ass said to me on a thread earlier

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No one!

So far I've had a lovely day, spent with my son "

My son is currently out playing and will probably turn up on his bike at 9pm lol

So much for lad and dad time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No-one has pissed in my chips today. But then, I've not left my house yet. .

Yeah but you've logged on to Fab that can be enough. I mean you should see what some smart ass said to me on a thread earlier "

I see you didn't take his advice.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Go to the local super martket .. you will Get a whole box full for ythe price those robbing bastards charge for one .... or buy some cones and a tub.... so you can scoop it yourself ..

Whats your favourite flavour ....mines RUM AND RAISIN ... LUSH !!!

"

Anything chocolatey in my case.

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