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Advice needed....... don't enter if easily upset...

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

My toast is stuck in the toaster

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Put it in the bin, it's a sign of the devils cumming. It'll get messy.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

The toaster ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Jab it with something pointy, it's the answer to most things in life I find

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, when the toaster gets a mind of its own and starts to eat the bread...

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Jab it with something pointy, it's the answer to most things in life I find "

The toast ?

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Yes, when the toaster gets a mind of its own and starts to eat the bread... "

It doesn't seem to be eating it... just holding on to it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bit of lube should ease the way

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

Do not... I repeat do not try to fish it out with a metal object

You're welcome

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Bit of lube should ease the way "

Is it best to use flavoured lube as it's toast ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Jab it with something pointy, it's the answer to most things in life I find

The toast ?"

Yeah then give it a wiggle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Do not... I repeat do not try to fish it out with a metal object

You're welcome "

I usually use a fork

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Do not... I repeat do not try to fish it out with a metal object

You're welcome "

Too late. I used a garden spade. Didn't work. Made a mess tho

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By *uckOfTheBayMan
over a year ago

Mold


"My toast is stuck in the toaster "

Give it a fork

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Do not... I repeat do not try to fish it out with a metal object

You're welcome

I usually use a fork "

I used to but found it took fucking ages to heat the bread. Nowadays it's a toaster all the way.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"My toast is stuck in the toaster

Give it a fork "

I know people say i'd fork anything but it's not true.

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

I'm deeply offended how dare you inflict you toastial misery on us. Hits the report button

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

Throw toaster and inserted bread in your bin! Buy a bigger toaster.

Actually whilst we're on this subject I have a 4 slice toaster and one half won't come off the bagel setting,it's bloody annoying I have to keep turning it around to do both side's

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Throw toaster and inserted bread in your bin! Buy a bigger toaster.

Actually whilst we're on this subject I have a 4 slice toaster and one half won't come off the bagel setting,it's bloody annoying I have to keep turning it around to do both side's "

#firstworldproblems lol

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"I'm deeply offended how dare you inflict you toastial misery on us. Hits the report button "

As long as there is wholemeal. I defend my right to toast it with impunity!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pry it out with a metal fork. Make sure the toaster is on though before you put the fork in... You can change your name to frazzled granny crumpets after without fear of being accused of false advertising too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Amazing the life you can get out of toast

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't pull it out with anything metal.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My mum bought me toaster tweezers. Theyre made of wood.

I was actually offended that she thought I needed them

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

..

Make sure you turn the socket off first if you're going to be poking around. Nobody wants a frazzled Granny-Crumpet

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester


"I'm deeply offended how dare you inflict you toastial misery on us. Hits the report button

As long as there is wholemeal. I defend my right to toast it with impunity!"

You really do have no shame do you. Disgusting

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Throw toaster and inserted bread in your bin! Buy a bigger toaster.

Actually whilst we're on this subject I have a 4 slice toaster and one half won't come off the bagel setting,it's bloody annoying I have to keep turning it around to do both side's "

Bagel setting ?! Oh EX cuse me while I titter into my Homes and Gardens.... fucking BAGEL setting.....

Cough.

Sorry for that. I do hope your bagel knob becomes unstuck shortly. xx X xx kisses of cyber sincerity xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you have any butter left?

Use it as lube, it'll slip right out

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Don't pull it out with anything metal."

That's what R2D2 said to the bishop .....

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Pry it out with a metal fork. Make sure the toaster is on though before you put the fork in... You can change your name to frazzled granny crumpets after without fear of being accused of false advertising too. "

It would be ToastedCrumpet surely ? That marketing job you had .... Sacked or resigned ?

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Amazing the life you can get out of toast "

Yeah .....it's not the toast in my life but the life in my toast that matters.

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By *rowleyMan
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Turn it upside down and shake it

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor


"Throw toaster and inserted bread in your bin! Buy a bigger toaster.

Actually whilst we're on this subject I have a 4 slice toaster and one half won't come off the bagel setting,it's bloody annoying I have to keep turning it around to do both side's

Bagel setting ?! Oh EX cuse me while I titter into my Homes and Gardens.... fucking BAGEL setting.....

Cough.

Sorry for that. I do hope your bagel knob becomes unstuck shortly. xx X xx kisses of cyber sincerity xx "

Yeah I have a posh toaster . Pile a pant's though don't get one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Don't pull it out with anything metal.

That's what R2D2 said to the bishop ....."

Lol

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"My mum bought me toaster tweezers. Theyre made of wood.

I was actually offended that she thought I needed them "

Seriously ..... that is sheer genius...

Im going to Google them ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What is wrong with the grill

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Toast tweezers WTF !!! Lmfao xx

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.

I thought your diet consisted of crumpets and now I read you fanny about trying to make bread into toast? Not cool.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor


"Throw toaster and inserted bread in your bin! Buy a bigger toaster.

Actually whilst we're on this subject I have a 4 slice toaster and one half won't come off the bagel setting,it's bloody annoying I have to keep turning it around to do both side's

#firstworldproblems lol"

I know right,if I could have been bothered I'd have frogmarched it back to Tescos I tell ya!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Throw toaster and inserted bread in your bin! Buy a bigger toaster.

Actually whilst we're on this subject I have a 4 slice toaster and one half won't come off the bagel setting,it's bloody annoying I have to keep turning it around to do both side's

#firstworldproblems lol

I know right,if I could have been bothered I'd have frogmarched it back to Tescos I tell ya! "

Id write a strongly worded letter to your local mp, surely in 2017 we shouldn't have to deal with such a travesty

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Make sure you turn the socket off first if you're going to be poking around. Nobody wants a frazzled Granny-Crumpet "

Poking around ........ what a lovely phrase.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Leave the toaster plugged into the mains, switched on, plunge said toaster into a sink full of water, wait 5 seconds for toast to float to the top and pull it back out.

Remember, never peer into a toaster, in case the toast is ejected and hits you in the eye.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Turn it upside down and shake it"

The toaster ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

remove toaster plug from wall, boil for 100years, both the toast and toaster might be fully edible

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"I thought your diet consisted of crumpets and now I read you fanny about trying to make bread into toast? Not cool. "

Meli.... Mel.... Me.... M.....

What would I put the butter on ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Get an angle grinder , cut the sides off the toaster then retrieve the toast , sorted

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Get a meet sorted quickly - a guy who's hungry - and it'll be fixed. Make him bring extra bread, if you're short of it.

Otherwise I'd unplug and try wooden spoon, after turning it upside down and shaking it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My mum bought me toaster tweezers. Theyre made of wood.

I was actually offended that she thought I needed them

Seriously ..... that is sheer genius...

Im going to Google them ... "

They even have a wee magnet so you can attach them to the toaster

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Do you have any butter left?

Use it as lube, it'll slip right out "

I have enough butter to rub David Walliams all over four times.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Pry it out with a metal fork. Make sure the toaster is on though before you put the fork in... You can change your name to frazzled granny crumpets after without fear of being accused of false advertising too. "

Having a bath at the same time helps

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Echo margerine helps

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Leave the toaster plugged into the mains, switched on, plunge said toaster into a sink full of water, wait 5 seconds for toast to float to the top and pull it back out.

Remember, never peer into a toaster, in case the toast is ejected and hits you in the eye. "

Still working for Health and Safety I see.

That was the first thing I tried - Made my slippers tingle.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Do you have any butter left?

Use it as lube, it'll slip right out

I have enough butter to rub David Walliams all over four times."

That's the same as five and a half Noel Edmunds in old money isn't it?

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"remove toaster plug from wall, boil for 100years, both the toast and toaster might be fully edible"

It'd look like Theresa May .....

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Get an angle grinder , cut the sides off the toaster then retrieve the toast , sorted"

You're the person who told me to get a steam roller to make pancakes.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"remove toaster plug from wall, boil for 100years, both the toast and toaster might be fully edible

It'd look like Theresa May ..... "

she'd be great in Roald Dahl's The Witches reboot

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Get an angle grinder , cut the sides off the toaster then retrieve the toast , sorted

You're the person who told me to get a steam roller to make pancakes..... "

Hehe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've heard putting it in the bathtub whilst plugged in might help

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I haven't flicked on the telly to check the little yellow sky news update bar at the bottom of the screen for a while... How's the stuck toast situation doing?...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Abandon operation toast and order a takeaway instead. Sorted.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"I haven't flicked on the telly to check the little yellow sky news update bar at the bottom of the screen for a while... How's the stuck toast situation doing?... "

It was on every station. They called in experts.......... A mathematician worked it out with a pencil.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Burning news lol xxxx

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By *eesideMan
over a year ago

margate sumwear by the sea

Un plug toaster

Then up side down over a plate

Shake and poke till tost falls out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've heard putting it in the bathtub whilst plugged in might help "

And don't you have to be in the bath too?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tip it upside down and give it a good hard bang

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP   Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"I've heard putting it in the bathtub whilst plugged in might help

And don't you have to be in the bath too?"

Im going to try that later..

You are such wonderful folk xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Leave the toaster plugged into the mains, switched on, plunge said toaster into a sink full of water, wait 5 seconds for toast to float to the top and pull it back out.

Remember, never peer into a toaster, in case the toast is ejected and hits you in the eye.

Still working for Health and Safety I see.

That was the first thing I tried - Made my slippers tingle. "

You're supposed to be in bare feet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Time to throw toaster out as it will di it again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That settles it, I,m off to buy some Tena lady, I have wet my pants reading this thread XXX

P. S.

I hope GrannyCrumpet hasn't been electroncuted fiddling with her toaster.XXX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take it in the bath with you.. The water will make it soggy and it will fall out... Voila

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

A woman who's prepared to navigate the highways and byways of England at the wheel of a cherrypicker is surely not phased by an errant slice of Warburtons.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A woman who's prepared to navigate the highways and byways of England at the wheel of a cherrypicker is surely not phased by an errant slice of Warburtons."
.

They took her ticket off her anyhow, she's only allowed on Gogos now

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