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By *ushroom7 OP   Man
over a year ago

Bradford

Are you with Will Self's "elitist, exclusive and tupefying" games

or Tessa slack Jowells "Team GB?"

And no, i definately wouldn't give her one for the team.

£9bn blimey.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

9bn is a lot of chips.

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By *ushroom7 OP   Man
over a year ago

Bradford

I wonder if 9bn tuna would fill the mediterranean sea?

when you think about it, that is still only about 1.384615 fish each. I know they're pretty big but it wouldn't last you a year.

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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago

glasgow

would they be in tins,or free range.

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By *ushroom7 OP   Man
over a year ago

Bradford

the meek ones would be in tins, a few wild ones baring their teeth around the adriatic.

maybe the leaning tower of pisa was modelled on a stack of tins, with a few columns and windows to tart it up a bit.

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By *ushroom7 OP   Man
over a year ago

Bradford

i've just rung archimedes up and aksed him what would happen to the mediterranen sea if all the tuna, sharks too i suppose, tried to swim into the med at the same time.

"don't be so fucking stupid" he said.

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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago

Hull

But the good points to note are that all the construction has been completed ahead of time, and under budget!

For once, Britain has got it right!

Now all the individual contractors who'll work the Games from Catering, to Security and so on will fuck it all up.

I mean, my last company, Sodexo, has the catering contract! Poor buggers who have to work for them, deserve a Gold Medal!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't get me started on this!

I'm paying for it, won't be going to it, will be disrupted by it and being told to keep out of the way to enable the world and his wife to travel freely!

I think I'll spontaneously combust within the year!

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

.


"

i've just rung archimedes up and aksed him what would happen to the mediterranen sea if all the tuna, sharks too i suppose, tried to swim into the med at the same time.

"don't be so fucking stupid" he said. "

Archimedes!, screw him

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By *ushroom7 OP   Man
over a year ago

Bradford


"But the good points to note are that all the construction has been completed ahead of time, and under budget!

For once, Britain has got it right!

Now all the individual contractors who'll work the Games from Catering, to Security and so on will fuck it all up.

I mean, my last company, Sodexo, has the catering contract! Poor buggers who have to work for them, deserve a Gold Medal! "

Woukld this be the budget that was set at £2.5bn or so, give or take a few £100,000,000, that rose to £9bn shortly afterwards?

anyone could come in under budget with games like that.

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By *ushroom7 OP   Man
over a year ago

Bradford


"Don't get me started on this!

I'm paying for it, won't be going to it, will be disrupted by it and being told to keep out of the way to enable the world and his wife to travel freely!

I think I'll spontaneously combust within the year! "

lucky you, lol

lol

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

I have tickets, I am so excited... Can't wait

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By *ushroom7 OP   Man
over a year ago

Bradford


"

i've just rung archimedes up and aksed him what would happen to the mediterranen sea if all the tuna, sharks too i suppose, tried to swim into the med at the same time.

"don't be so fucking stupid" he said.

Archimedes!, screw him "

no way, i've got principles

and debenhams vouchers too

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

are you lot (apart from GENGUY and sassy) on drugs????

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

They are to fly to Switzerland for a month the day this shit starts here...

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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago

glasgow


"

the meek ones would be in tins, a few wild ones baring their teeth around the adriatic.

maybe the leaning tower of pisa was modelled on a stack of tins, with a few columns and windows to tart it up a bit. "

hmmmmm would the tide be in,or out.

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By *umourCouple
over a year ago

Rushden

Be fookin glad when it's all over! All media hijacked for the next year? Sheer hell.....

Watch the billions spent on that turn to billions more for upkeep of underused buildings, built in the wrong area of London to apease the PC brigade!

Transport??? What fookin transport!!! Stopping traffic to the "athletes" can get about? Fookin terrible if you ask me!

Bloody foreigners coming into the country??? Who fookin wants em?? Comin over here and taking all our seats at the games... Why not just get em to send the money they gonna spend here??? So much easier!

Legacy, what legacy??? Just a bunch of kids runnin, swimmin, cyclin and other stuff... Whats wrong with them playin on computers??? Was fookin good enough for me!!!

OK, think I got everything! Just thought I'd save the people who don't like the games having to post!

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By *umourCouple
over a year ago

Rushden

Forgot to mention, I don't want the games either!

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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago

glasgow


"Be fookin glad when it's all over! All media hijacked for the next year? Sheer hell.....

Watch the billions spent on that turn to billions more for upkeep of underused buildings, built in the wrong area of London to apease the PC brigade!

Transport??? What fookin transport!!! Stopping traffic to the "athletes" can get about? Fookin terrible if you ask me!

Bloody foreigners coming into the country??? Who fookin wants em?? Comin over here and taking all our seats at the games... Why not just get em to send the money they gonna spend here??? So much easier!

Legacy, what legacy??? Just a bunch of kids runnin, swimmin, cyclin and other stuff... Whats wrong with them playin on computers??? Was fookin good enough for me!!!

OK, think I got everything! Just thought I'd save the people who don't like the games having to post! "

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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago

glasgow

oops,nearly forgot,will other tinned fish be involved,salmon,mackerel,sardines,etc etc.

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay


"Forgot to mention, I don't want the games either! "

Bit bloody late to tell them that now....you should have said earlier...like before they spent all that money.

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By *ushroom7 OP   Man
over a year ago

Bradford


"

the meek ones would be in tins, a few wild ones baring their teeth around the adriatic.

maybe the leaning tower of pisa was modelled on a stack of tins, with a few columns and windows to tart it up a bit.

hmmmmm would the tide be in,or out. "

what time of day are you talking?

bet they won't pay 20 euros for an umbrella hire either.

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By *ushroom7 OP   Man
over a year ago

Bradford

Legacy?

A pound to a penny that if you went swimming on a Saturday morning after the gamesthe frigging diving boards would be out of use. Typical.

Entrepreneurial idea:

Tuna rides, come and get yer tuna rides.

200m Tuna races, with speedo clad jockeys.

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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago

glasgow


"

the meek ones would be in tins, a few wild ones baring their teeth around the adriatic.

maybe the leaning tower of pisa was modelled on a stack of tins, with a few columns and windows to tart it up a bit.

hmmmmm would the tide be in,or out.

what time of day are you talking?

bet they won't pay 20 euros for an umbrella hire either. "

say 10-11ish.

10% discount for all fish,so it's really only 18 euros.

except mackerel,they wrecked the place last year.

ok say 12ish.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

Ban the lot...

Except the swimming and diving... More close-ups and slow motion before they dive on crotch shots

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By *ushroom7 OP   Man
over a year ago

Bradford


"

bet they won't pay 20 euros for an umbrella hire either.

say 10-11ish.

10% discount for all fish,so it's really only 18 euros.

except mackerel,they wrecked the place last year.

ok say 12ish. "

yep, tide is out that day at 12

guiseppe, who's more approachable than his dad archibaldymedes, said he'll do a cheaper rate for the herrings if they'll lie in a diagonal shaped pattern, head to tail, tail to head

and saucy, one last thing..... no cod pieces this time lol

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By *ushroom7 OP   Man
over a year ago

Bradford


"Ban the lot...

Except the swimming and diving... More close-ups and slow motion before they dive on crotch shots"

Alternatively, if pissing by the roadside was an Olympic sport we may have a medal prospect.

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By *ushroom7 OP   Man
over a year ago

Bradford

How well can sheep swim, and could they hang onto a dorsal fin?

If only Socrates hadn't retired.

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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago

Hull


"are you lot (apart from GENGUY and sassy) on drugs???? "

I was too modest to point this out, so "thank you" for doing so!

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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago

glasgow


"

bet they won't pay 20 euros for an umbrella hire either.

say 10-11ish.

10% discount for all fish,so it's really only 18 euros.

except mackerel,they wrecked the place last year.

ok say 12ish.

yep, tide is out that day at 12

guiseppe, who's more approachable than his dad archibaldymedes, said he'll do a cheaper rate for the herrings if they'll lie in a diagonal shaped pattern, head to tail, tail to head

and saucy, one last thing..... no cod pieces this time lol

"

it takes a 29lb cod to cover my modesty,so that'll be a weight off.

although i will miss the gammy's.

friggin herring,bet they're allowed to smoke as well.grrrrrrrr

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By *ushroom7 OP   Man
over a year ago

Bradford

talking of cod, i'd rather have haddock, so i went in the chippy as you do

and asked for haddock and chips, as normal folks do like and the guy said "we have no haddock",

i said "Ok i'll have a special haddock and chips, please,"

getting exasperated he said "we are out of haddock", so i said "Well i'll just have the haddock then, forget about the chips"

then he glares at me an says "mushy, spell haddock without an F"

so i said "but there is no F in haddock"

"Finally, praise the lord" he says

Not going back there in a hurry. What a plaice.

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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago

Hull


"

talking of cod, i'd rather have haddock, so i went in the chippy as you do

and asked for haddock and chips, as normal folks do like and the guy said "we have no haddock",

i said "Ok i'll have a special haddock and chips, please,"

getting exasperated he said "we are out of haddock", so i said "Well i'll just have the haddock then, forget about the chips"

then he glares at me an says "mushy, spell haddock without an F"

so i said "but there is no F in haddock"

"Finally, praise the lord" he says

Not going back there in a hurry. What a plaice.

"

Yea, the guy was a dab hand and left you floundering!

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By *ushroom7 OP   Man
over a year ago

Bradford


"

Yea, the guy was a dab hand and left you floundering! "

eel come round

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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago

glasgow

this all sounds a bit fishy to me.

i'm willing to bet,there was f in haddock.

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By *ushroom7 OP   Man
over a year ago

Bradford


"this all sounds a bit fishy to me.

i'm willing to bet,there was f in haddock."

there's always one aint there, takes a serious thread off topic

spose thats a result of the credit crunchie

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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago

Hull


"this all sounds a bit fishy to me.

i'm willing to bet,there was f in haddock.

there's always one aint there, takes a serious thread off topic

spose thats a result of the credit crunchie"

Hey! Remember you moved off the thread, by mentioning Tuna fish!

Or had you forgotten, as it was that far back?

Nurse, he's out wandering again!

Get him back to his ward

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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago

glasgow


"this all sounds a bit fishy to me.

i'm willing to bet,there was f in haddock.

there's always one aint there, takes a serious thread off topic

spose thats a result of the credit crunchie"

aw cmon mushy,dont go all pink salmon on me.

oh and dont bring up the credit crunch,

fishy will be on in a minute,

oops i mean wishy.

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By *umourCouple
over a year ago

Rushden


"

Yea, the guy was a dab hand and left you floundering!

eel come round

"

Liked that little story and I was going to tell Hali.. But!!!

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By *obbytupperMan
over a year ago

Menston near Ilkley

Now Fanny Haddock she was a good cook

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