FabSwingers.com forum: Keeping a lid on it

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Anyone who has ever tried to arrange meeting me will know that I am a nightmare for it. I owe coffees and drinks and other things to various people.

But when the stars align and the planets are in the correct sequence it does happen.

Often this will mean weeks of waiting for the day itself. How does everyone else keep a lid on the excitement if a meet is a fairly long time away?

Alternatively, how do you keep things bubbling along in the meantime?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is where I struggle....if I planned a meet in advance I would usually end up getting cold feet and cancelling

So now I tend to only meet last minute. I get bored very very quickly so I have to act on impulse these days

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How do I keep a lid on it? Badly! If I'm honest.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know what you mean fella, most of my meets are weeks in the planning - I guess all you can do is take Shags advice and be patient!

It's like going on holiday - it's good to build up for a few weeks and get excited imagining all the good things you're going to do, and when you get there go fill your boots and make sure it's epic!

I usually have lots of work and domestic shit going on in the meantime to distract me (hence why I can't meet sooner!) so my mind is occupied elsewhere for most of the time anyway!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Talk to them and keep the excitement going. I like waiting and building up tension. I like chatting and getting to know them more so im not as nervous when we meet.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

Suppose that's a plus to only meeting (hopefully) unattached people as I can be impatient and keeping the monumentum going may be a little hard at time's. I also tend to thing the longer the wait the less likely it's to happen.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lots of talking, getting to know what they like. Flirting, just so many things. I don't think I'm too good at it. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was like this and had cancelled meets that were 2 weeks away. Until i started talking to someone and we arranged to meet in a month (!) I started a thread on it as i was so sure i would cancel. Anyway we spoke on whats app every day (maybe excessive) sent pics/videos. He detouted my way twice for a drink in this month wait so it wasnt too bad but the excitment just built and built and we had a great time.

So no actual tips aside from keep the communication going x

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"Lots of talking, getting to know what they like. Flirting, just so many things. I don't think I'm too good at it. X "

I'm really lousy at replying to winks....

I chat to people - in the end it doesn't matter if I meet them or not as long as they are interesting people.

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By *ryst In IsoldeWoman
over a year ago

your imagination

I'm a planner too... Rarely is anything spontaneous anymore unless there's a blue moon and I happen to be free at the same time as someone I've met before and am comfortable meeting with at very short notice. But I love the build-up, excitement and butterflies of planning ahead and knowing the person you're meeting is feeling exactly the same... Counting down the days, smiling at texts, teasing conversations, building the anticipation... Just the gleeful giddiness of knowing that the best is yet to come

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

I guess just keeping that conversation going? Not a strict daily one but the odd check in message and stuff.

It just happens for me - there have been meets that have taken several months to happen and as long as they don't mug me off, it happens.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So...

Tip 1: Patience is key

Tip 2: Communication is keyer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It took a personal record of nine months to meet with my last meet.

We talked every day via whatsapp, discussed what we'd like to do and see, talked about every topic under the sun. I also wasn't unknown to send teasing photos and one or two videos too.

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

Without fail, every meet or social I've planned too far in advance has never happened.

I keep it within the same week or wait.

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

"So...

Tip 1: Patience is key

Tip 2: Communication is keyer

...and if all else fails, telephone sex!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't. If they can't meet within a week I stop chatting.

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

Communication or even silence until nearer the time.

Some people are harder to meet than others, but then some of them are worth any wait

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

Having said that I'd not wait for some random guy who messaged me, only for forum chums really

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My next meet has just been planned for end of July. Not our first meet, we talk every day.

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"This is where I struggle....if I planned a meet in advance I would usually end up getting cold feet and cancelling

So now I tend to only meet last minute. I get bored very very quickly so I have to act on impulse these days

Exactly the same here , this way works a treat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So...

Tip 1: Patience is key

Tip 2: Communication is keyer

...and if all else fails, telephone sex!!

Is that a real thing?

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"So...

Tip 1: Patience is key

Tip 2: Communication is keyer

...and if all else fails, telephone sex!!

Is that a real thing? "

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

"Having said that I'd not wait for some random guy who messaged me, only for forum chums really

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Apologies - got dragged away just after posting the question

Thanks all. So the lessons are talk but not too much.

Keep a blanket for the cold feet and fill yer boots when you get there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can't do long waits.. as normally not interested if it takes to long.

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston

I think I need some help keeping a lid on it

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think I need some help keeping a lid on it

Knickers are the answer...

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston

"I think I need some help keeping a lid on it

Knickers are the answer..."

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston

Definitely need help

https://youtu.be/iPUmE-tne5U

No lid here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is where I struggle....if I planned a meet in advance I would usually end up getting cold feet and cancelling

So now I tend to only meet last minute. I get bored very very quickly so I have to act on impulse these days

Exactly the same here , this way works a treat

"
to be honest even a day in advance and that's me over thinking . Best times we have had is when i turn up and then realise its a meet. If i dont like someone then quick drink excuse made and leave but far better than all this silly sex talk and false flattery

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"This is where I struggle....if I planned a meet in advance I would usually end up getting cold feet and cancelling

So now I tend to only meet last minute. I get bored very very quickly so I have to act on impulse these days

Exactly the same here , this way works a treat

to be honest even a day in advance and that's me over thinking . Best times we have had is when i turn up and then realise its a meet. If i dont like someone then quick drink excuse made and leave but far better than all this silly sex talk and false flattery "

That's an interesting thought.

Hypothetically, if you started chatting to someone but meeting just wasn't possible for a few weeks, would you then tell them to come back to you when it was more convenient for all involved?

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

For me I like to build a certain level of connection and chemistry before agreeing to meet, so any meet would be after a "getting to know you" period of chatting on here anyway, as opposed to instantaneous. Once a meet has been agreed it's just a case of continuing to chat and get to know each other until it happens.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is where I struggle....if I planned a meet in advance I would usually end up getting cold feet and cancelling

So now I tend to only meet last minute. I get bored very very quickly so I have to act on impulse these days

Exactly the same here , this way works a treat

That's an interesting thought.

Hypothetically, if you started chatting to someone but meeting just wasn't possible for a few weeks, would you then tell them to come back to you when it was more convenient for all involved?"
pretty much yes.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"This is where I struggle....if I planned a meet in advance I would usually end up getting cold feet and cancelling

So now I tend to only meet last minute. I get bored very very quickly so I have to act on impulse these days

Exactly the same here , this way works a treat

That's an interesting thought.

Ok - thanks

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston

Impossible to keep a lid on something when the pot is bubbling so intensely. You know what I mean boiling not simmering

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By *ryst In IsoldeWoman
over a year ago

your imagination

"Impossible to keep a lid on something when the pot is bubbling so intensely. You know what I mean boiling not simmering

You can sing that one Pinky!!

Sizzling....

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

If ive become friends with someone the wait doesnt matter as they are friends and will chat regularly.

If its a random i usually like to meet about three weeks after chatting. I would lose interest any longer.

I have a friend whose a nightmare to meet but i dont mind cause they are worth it

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston

"Impossible to keep a lid on something when the pot is bubbling so intensely. You know what I mean boiling not simmering

You can sing that one Pinky!!

Sizzling...."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Plenty of contact via kik inc lots of flirting always keeps me bubbling along

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

KABOOM

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"KABOOM

Anyone would think you're excited. X

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston

Haha I've just seen someone's lid fly past

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"KABOOM

Are you meeting someone you've waited week's to meet?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"KABOOM

Are you meeting someone you've waited week's to meet?"

How can you tell?

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By *ryst In IsoldeWoman
over a year ago

your imagination

"KABOOM

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"KABOOM

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"KABOOM

Are you meeting someone you've waited week's to meet?

How can you tell?

Horray!!

ENJOY!!

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"KABOOM

Are you meeting someone you've waited week's to meet?

How can you tell?

I do hope you're not disappointed

. I've learned from experience not to get too excited before meeting someone,although it's great when the excitement carries on after that initial face to face contact.

I miss that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"KABOOM

Are you meeting someone you've waited week's to meet?

How can you tell?

I do hope you're not disappointed

. I've learned from experience not to get too excited before meeting someone,although it's great when the excitement carries on after that initial face to face contact.

I miss that

Ive had a mix of both. And something in the middle.

Relationships can explode and turn sour.

Some can turn to a simmer and get boiling again at the drop of a text/meeting again.

Some just never drop off, the kitting carries in, the friendship and communication continues as it always was. these are the Ines I like and are drawn to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't say I've ever felt that level of excitement over a sex meet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"KABOOM

Are you meeting someone you've waited week's to meet?

How can you tell?

I do hope you're not disappointed

. I've learned from experience not to get too excited before meeting someone,although it's great when the excitement carries on after that initial face to face contact.

I miss that

I know what you mean but the day I stop getting over excited is the day I take a look at all this and stop.

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston

"I can't say I've ever felt that level of excitement over a sex meet."

I might be way off the mark here but it sounds like a bit more than a sex meet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah it must be hard arranging meets behind your partner's back

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I can't say I've ever felt that level of excitement over a sex meet.

I might be way off the mark here but it sounds like a bit more than a sex meet

In the OP's head at least. Building someone up in my head so they can only be a disappoitment

isn't something I do either

- it's not fair to them

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By *ingle Beds LassWoman
over a year ago

Bedfordshire

"This is where I struggle....if I planned a meet in advance I would usually end up getting cold feet and cancelling

So now I tend to only meet last minute. I get bored very very quickly so I have to act on impulse these days

100% this...

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston

"I can't say I've ever felt that level of excitement over a sex meet.

I might be way off the mark here but it sounds like a bit more than a sex meet

In the OP's head at least. Building someone up in my head so they can only be a disappoitment

isn't something I do either

- it's not fair to them

*Newsflash*

It's mutual

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"I can't say I've ever felt that level of excitement over a sex meet.

I might be way off the mark here but it sounds like a bit more than a sex meet

I thought they'd met before. Fail on my part.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I can't say I've ever felt that level of excitement over a sex meet.

I might be way off the mark here but it sounds like a bit more than a sex meet

In the OP's head at least. Building someone up in my head so they can only be a disappoitment

isn't something I do either

- it's not fair to them

*Newsflash*

It's mutual

I should bloody hope so, not interested in meeting the delusional!!

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"KABOOM

Are you meeting someone you've waited week's to meet?

How can you tell?

I do hope you're not disappointed

. I've learned from experience not to get too excited before meeting someone,although it's great when the excitement carries on after that initial face to face contact.

I miss that

I know what you mean but the day I stop getting over excited is the day I take a look at all this and stop.

Yeah I get that,I just try and save getting over excited and nervous until after the social and I've clapped eyes on them and know I definitely want them. Saves on the disappoint I suppose.

I want to feel nervous and out of control of thing's again,because I know if I'm like that I really really like them

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