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Married but have separate bank accounts

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By * and M looking OP   Couple
over a year ago

Worcester

We have quite a few friends but have just discovered from our set of friends that they have separate bank accounts?

How is that being a couple?

Views please.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My parents had separate bank accounts as my dad was crap with money and my mum didn't want him pinching hers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We're engaged, have had a mortgage together since 21.

Never felt the need for a joint bank account.

What difference does it make?

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By *appy squirrelWoman
over a year ago

Norwich

in last relationship we both had our own accounts and one together for shoppingand stuff. worked well!

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By * and M looking OP   Couple
over a year ago

Worcester

Its as if they have something to hide from each other.

It just feels strange to us?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

married but both has access to the accounts nothing to hide

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Its as if they have something to hide from each other.

It just feels strange to us?"

On the other had, we trust each other enough not to feel the other one might be hiding something.

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By * and M looking OP   Couple
over a year ago

Worcester

They have been married for years btw

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

It's very sensible, apart from anything else it spreads the risk.

Love is wonderful, and sharing everything is great but when it goes bad money is the thing that will be fought over.

For women experiencing domestic abuse, financial coercion and control is one of the things that keeps them stuck in the relationship.

If you love your partner, set their bank account free.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Individual accounts here, never felt the need to change.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I was married we also had our individual accounts and then a joint account for mortgage/shopping etc

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By *omaMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

Nothing strange about having separate accounts. . can't see any problem with it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My parents had separate bank accounts as my dad was crap with money and my mum didn't want him pinching hers"

This. I am terrible with money so it's for the best for both

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I really wish we had kept separate bank accounts. It would have made detangling from eachother financially a lot easier!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We have quite a few friends but have just discovered from our set of friends that they have separate bank accounts?

How is that being a couple?

Views please."
I would never ever have a joint bank account again... dont see how being financially independent is not being a couple. We live completely seperately yet still are a couple x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have joint account which we put so much a week in.the rest is our own in separate accounts

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By *lkDomWhtSubBiCpleCouple
over a year ago

Somewhere / Everywhere /Kinksville

I've experienced both sides to this and I have to say separate accounts is by far my preference, with possibly a joint account for bills or as back up for a lower earner.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have separate accounts but the wife has my pin number and can take money out whenever she wants.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Married, both have single bank accounts,joint account, single accounts on here , joint account too... I'm trying to understand why is such a conundrum op?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I'd had a separate bank account from my ex we might of lasted longer then we did as money ended up being bone of contention between us. I don't cry about it anymore tho.

PTU xxx

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By *oxic1998Woman
over a year ago

Belfast


"I really wish we had kept separate bank accounts. It would have made detangling from eachother financially a lot easier!"

Same here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are having same descusion if we move in together

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

We have a joint account and our own single accounts

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

How is having joint accounts a status of being a couple. You are single you have an account but then get married so should have only joint accounts? It seems dangerous if one party has sending habits the other doesn't.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Plus, how do you get gifts and plan surprises for each other with the same account?

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By *ubSirVient-DefinitionCouple
over a year ago

dukinfield

I'm shit with money so we have q joint account for everything tgat I don't access. and I have my own account that my pocket money goes in lol

AJ

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We've had a joint account, but we were shit together so we went back to having separate accounts.

Mr is salaried so he pays the mortgage, sky, phone bills etc, and I'm paid weekly so I get the week to week shopping, school lunches, electricity etc.

There are no trust issues between us in any respects of our lives, this just works better for us x

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By *eardyBikerMan
over a year ago

nr stonehaven

2 seperate and 1 joint acct.

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By *otandStickyCouple
over a year ago

Poole

Whatever works best I say...no drama either way!

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By *ungBlackTopMan
over a year ago

salford

well if you sleep with other people when you're married, having separate bank accounts shouldn't be a big deal should it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd never solely have a joint account.

Two singles, and a joint for food/bills.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"well if you sleep with other people when you're married, having separate bank accounts shouldn't be a big deal should it?"

hahahahahaha Definitely this x

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

My parents have been married 62 years and never had a joint bank account. We have a joint account and individual accounts.

Just because we're married it doesn't mean we're no longer individuals.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Being a couple isn't determined by a certificate, or deeds to a house, or a joint bank account.

Sharing a toothbrush however.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"Being a couple isn't determined by a certificate, or deeds to a house, or a joint bank account.

Sharing a toothbrush however."

Shared gingivitis is a proper commitment.

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By * and M looking OP   Couple
over a year ago

Worcester

It was just a shock to us as we have had a joint account since we bought our first house together back in the 80's.

We assumed that this was the norm, but obviously not.

Just threw it out there to get your feedback.

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By *lik and PaulCouple
over a year ago

Flagrante

I've never had a joint bank account and never will.

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By * and M looking OP   Couple
over a year ago

Worcester


"Plus, how do you get gifts and plan surprises for each other with the same account?

"

That's easy, I leave our banking to hubby, I just do the company finances.

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By *elma and ShaggyCouple
over a year ago

Bedworth

We have both single accounts and a joint account. We use the joint account for all of our day to day stuff like bills and then tend to use out solo accounts as additional savings accounts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have both a joint one and the wife has her own. It's quite handy because when either of us are down to rock bottom, the other always has a few quid left until pay day.

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

Separate accounts here , nothing to hide but that's how we roll

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Completely fail to see why there should a direct connection between shared bank account and happy marriage.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We both have separate accounts as both run our own businesses easier this way we find

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By *atietvsheffTV/TS
over a year ago

Sheffield

After my divorce and being left with £47 cos she cleaned the lot out of the joint accounts before she left I would never ever ever again have anything in joint names with a partner, for those of you who do then it's only a matter of time before it goes from all fine to ripoffed time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would never have a joint account again, my ex husband quizzed me if I took £10 from the account and made me feel like I was stealing !!

I also worked full time and paid into the account !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Me and my ex had our own accounts and a joint account. The joint account we both put a bit into to cover bills and shopping. What we had left was ours

We went to work for it so could do with it as we pleased. Didn't make us any less of a couple.

I would never join all my money with a partner, I work long hours and too hard to just give it away

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By *egasus NobMan
over a year ago

Merton

Best to have join and separate account

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just need my joint account... for me, myself and I

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't think I've ever considered having seperate bank accounts in my married relationship. It doesn't really mesh with how I see my marriage.

But I have read that having separate accounts is a growing trend in modern relationships and that more people have some form of separate accounts (either completely separate or both joint and separate) than have soley joint accounts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm married, we have joint accounts that we both fund for bills, shopping and savings etc and we also have our own current accounts that our salaries go in to and our own 'spending money'. We know how much we get paid each month and contribute to the joint accounts so that we're both left with the same 'own money' each month and we spend our own money as we both see fit!

Simples!

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By *atietvsheffTV/TS
over a year ago

Sheffield


"After my divorce and being left with £47 cos she cleaned the lot out of the joint accounts before she left I would never ever ever again have anything in joint names with a partner, for those of you who do then it's only a matter of time before it goes from all fine to ripoffed time "

I suppose thinking about it, I do have a joint account, me and katie although I know who the most expensive tastes in clothes and shoes!!!

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham


"Plus, how do you get gifts and plan surprises for each other with the same account?

"

This is my reason for wanting my own account

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't see why it's anyone else's business how someone manages their finances, and certainly don't see that there's any correlation between shared finances and a strong marriage.

I don't really understand why you'd need a shared account and arguably there's a greater trust demonstrated when you don't feel you have to be able to keep tabs on what your other half is spending/buying.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We share the bills and have our own accounts. Nothing to do with hiding anything It's just convenient for us. It was a pain in the arse when we got married and got cheques made out to both of us. We had to open a joint account for that. And haven't used it since. I quite like that after the bills have been paid the money in my account is mine. I spend it on what I want and hubby does likewise. I can't understand why a couple would prefer a joint account. .unless they didn't trust their partner and had to keep tabs on them.

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By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke

Seperate accounts all the way.

Men don't appreciate paying half of the Nth pair of shoes and women don't appreciate paying half of the tip you gave the masseuse for the happy ending.

Why invent problems that you don't need to have!?

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By *rinkydonkyMan
over a year ago

Hinckley


"We have quite a few friends but have just discovered from our set of friends that they have separate bank accounts?

How is that being a couple?

Views please."
..... I was married once and we only had one bank account....."HERS" !

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By *unlovingheroMan
over a year ago

DEVIZES


"We have quite a few friends but have just discovered from our set of friends that they have separate bank accounts?

How is that being a couple?

Views please...... I was married once and we only had one bank account....."HERS" !"
made me chuckle

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By *it of fun cplCouple
over a year ago

village between York and Hull

In my first marriage we had separate accounts and a joint account, we both pu X amount a month into the joint account and paid the bills out of that.

This time we both have our own account and no joint one, no issues and saves on bank charges

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Our wages go into our own bank accounts and then we each put money into a joint account to pay the bills each month/4weeks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If we had a joint bank account we would be skint and out on the street years ago.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Its as if they have something to hide from each other.

It just feels strange to us?"

Not at all.

Each give proportionate to their salary what it takes to keep the house going.

Then they have their own money.

It doesn't mean they are being deceitful.

No one said that one doesn't know what the other has got.

I'd find it bloody odd to have to ask a partner for money to buy them a gift or do something as an individual.

People should never lose their individuality even when being half of a very strong relationship.

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston

Separate beds is more of a concern in my opinion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Separate beds is more of a concern in my opinion "

Not if one person snores like a wulrus

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston


"Separate beds is more of a concern in my opinion

Not if one person snores like a wulrus "

I'll rephrase, separate beds and never sharing one for any kind of activity

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Its as if they have something to hide from each other.

It just feels strange to us?

On the other had, we trust each other enough not to feel the other one might be hiding something. "

This

Why the need to feel you have to have joint accounts?

We are individuals.. you dont have a joint account with your children yet you love them.

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By *olliPineCouple
over a year ago

swingers clubs

[Removed by poster at 11/06/17 09:35:36]

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By *olliPineCouple
over a year ago

swingers clubs

We've been married 13 years and have never gotten around to opening a joint bank account

It's still being a couple as the finances are still pooled and the mortgage is a joint one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My ex wife robbed me from our joint account whilst I was in afgan. All my pay went into it paid the mortgage car.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This isn't surprising to me at all, I know alot of people who have 3 accounts between them, one for the joint bills in both names and one for the rest of their money in each of their names, it is fairly common these days. I don't see what the problem is with it personally, people do things their way and feel happy that way then there is no issue right?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We only have the joint account, it works for us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm married, we have joint accounts that we both fund for bills, shopping and savings etc and we also have our own current accounts that our salaries go in to and our own 'spending money'. We know how much we get paid each month and contribute to the joint accounts so that we're both left with the same 'own money' each month and we spend our own money as we both see fit!

Simples! "

Same here

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