FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Boys will be boys

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

People like this need put down

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why does it need to be a negative statement? Boys being boys could mean they're chatty and respectful and take care of others.

She needs to get a grip.

Yes there is a need to teach our kids they can be whatever they want despite their gender and the associated stereotypes but at the end of the day boys and girls are different.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rrol.BMan
over a year ago

Wrexham

Possibly you've missed the point?

The phrase has been used over the years to make light of, or explain away, many rather heinous actions and activities.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago

•+• Access Denied •+•

not a lot of feminists on here is there?

it's using the excuse that being a douche is ok coz you're male. gender does not explain behaviour.

here's your homework for today, if you don't understand why that phrase is offensive.

what type of behviours are explained away with the phrase 'boys will be boys'?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ubyroseWoman
over a year ago

London

hi is cams down....?

as cant load......

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Possibly you've missed the point?

The phrase has been used over the years to make light of, or explain away, many rather heinous actions and activities."

It's on a kids tshirt, my son doesn't know what a heinous crime is, if I buy him this shirt will he go an sexually assault someone?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In my local Asda the t-shirt reads

Boys will be Men! We're tough where I'm from.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *andemanMan
over a year ago

bedforshire

Frankly I can not see that this is worthy of much comment. No offense OP. Are boys going to be puppys? Kittens? Rocks?

A boy who is trans will be a girl. So not sure that the tshirt is offensive to them but leave the trans comminity to determin that.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think in general high-street fashion does sometimes push the limits of what constitutes common decency but it caters for a demand .....

But I don't allow myself to sexualise the motivation of the wearer of those clothes ......

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *RR68BMan
over a year ago

Bournemouth

What a non story.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"hi is cams down....?

as cant unlload......"

FIFY.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Possibly you've missed the point?

The phrase has been used over the years to make light of, or explain away, many rather heinous actions and activities.

It's on a kids tshirt, my son doesn't know what a heinous crime is, if I buy him this shirt will he go an sexually assault someone?"

Kids aren't allowed the innocence of youth apparently

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago

•+• Access Denied •+•


"hi is cams down....?

as cant load......"

you probably need to update your flash.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What a non story."

I know, I just wanted to get peoples opinions

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think she needs to chill out if she gets so wound up by a t-shirt.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"not a lot of feminists on here is there?

it's using the excuse that being a douche is ok coz you're male. gender does not explain behaviour.

here's your homework for today, if you don't understand why that phrase is offensive.

what type of behviours are explained away with the phrase 'boys will be boys'?"

Zzzzz I find the fact people like you are offended by everything offensive, don't hear me complaining though

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On a kids t shirt the phrase boys will be boys means to me that boys will get muddy, make a mess, play fight with each other.

I wish my biggest problem in life was being offended by a t shirt.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago

•+• Access Denied •+•


"not a lot of feminists on here is there?

it's using the excuse that being a douche is ok coz you're male. gender does not explain behaviour.

here's your homework for today, if you don't understand why that phrase is offensive.

what type of behviours are explained away with the phrase 'boys will be boys'?

Zzzzz I find the fact people like you are offended by everything offensive, don't hear me complaining though "

i'm not offended by everything.. i am offended that many people think explaining away poor behaviour with the excuse of male gender is stupid thinking.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"On a kids t shirt the phrase boys will be boys means to me that boys will get muddy, make a mess, play fight with each other.

I wish my biggest problem in life was being offended by a t shirt. "

Boom, that was my first thought of "boys will be boys"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I doubt she is on fab, otherwise she would know some boys are girls

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"not a lot of feminists on here is there?

it's using the excuse that being a douche is ok coz you're male. gender does not explain behaviour.

here's your homework for today, if you don't understand why that phrase is offensive.

what type of behviours are explained away with the phrase 'boys will be boys'?

Zzzzz I find the fact people like you are offended by everything offensive, don't hear me complaining though

i'm not offended by everything.. i am offended that many people think explaining away poor behaviour with the excuse of male gender is stupid thinking."

What kind of poor behaviour are you thinking of, as the poster above said who I agreed with, it means boys going out and getting muddy, cuts and scrapes from falling off their bike etc

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *RR68BMan
over a year ago

Bournemouth


"I doubt she is on fab, otherwise she would know some boys are girls "

Exactly. I fail to see how this is offensive or misleading. We live in a transgender world these days. What is the OP going to do when t-shirts say "Boys Will Be Girls" on them lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago

•+• Access Denied •+•


"not a lot of feminists on here is there?

it's using the excuse that being a douche is ok coz you're male. gender does not explain behaviour.

here's your homework for today, if you don't understand why that phrase is offensive.

what type of behviours are explained away with the phrase 'boys will be boys'?

Zzzzz I find the fact people like you are offended by everything offensive, don't hear me complaining though

i'm not offended by everything.. i am offended that many people think explaining away poor behaviour with the excuse of male gender is stupid thinking.

What kind of poor behaviour are you thinking of, as the poster above said who I agreed with, it means boys going out and getting muddy, cuts and scrapes from falling off their bike etc"

my generation explained away male violence with that phrase.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *reenleavesCouple
over a year ago

North Wales

'Boys will be boys' is essentially normalising r.a.p.e culture at its most extreme extrapolation. I'm sure the shirt makers intended it to be taken more as 'boys will play in the mud and eat worms', however.

The dangerous part is where the 'boys' are forcing themselves upon women and end up sexualy assaulting them or worse and it being dismissed as 'typical high-spirited boy behaviour'. Similarly, yelling 'complements' at women from cars or in the street or from building sites. 'just boys being boys, innit'.

If you raise people to believe that their gender/ethnicity/geographical location/social class gives them a free pass on treating others poorly then you're just reinforcing the patriarchy.

From small acorns, mighty oaks to grow.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

Oh well this must mean my t-shirt that says "airbags fitted as standard" is too overly sexual and I'm a walking hindrance on the world whilst wearing it

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 16/05/17 13:03:47]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"On a kids t shirt the phrase boys will be boys means to me that boys will get muddy, make a mess, play fight with each other.

I wish my biggest problem in life was being offended by a t shirt. "
If the phrase said Girl will be girl it would be fine with me too. I think some read to much into things at times.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"not a lot of feminists on here is there?

it's using the excuse that being a douche is ok coz you're male. gender does not explain behaviour.

here's your homework for today, if you don't understand why that phrase is offensive.

what type of behviours are explained away with the phrase 'boys will be boys'?

Zzzzz I find the fact people like you are offended by everything offensive, don't hear me complaining though

i'm not offended by everything.. i am offended that many people think explaining away poor behaviour with the excuse of male gender is stupid thinking.

What kind of poor behaviour are you thinking of, as the poster above said who I agreed with, it means boys going out and getting muddy, cuts and scrapes from falling off their bike etc

my generation explained away male violence with that phrase."

Maybe it's your generation that's the problem then, allow me and my generation to buy our kids what we please without someone getting offended

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Oh well this must mean my t-shirt that says "airbags fitted as standard" is too overly sexual and I'm a walking hindrance on the world whilst wearing it

"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *RR68BMan
over a year ago

Bournemouth


"'Boys will be boys' is essentially normalising r.a.p.e culture at its most extreme extrapolation."

Oh please. It means nothing of the sort and nor does it suggest such.

Typical of the PC brigade, hasn't anyone got anything of more concern to worry about?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"'Boys will be boys' is essentially normalising r.a.p.e culture at its most extreme extrapolation. I'm sure the shirt makers intended it to be taken more as 'boys will play in the mud and eat worms', however.

The dangerous part is where the 'boys' are forcing themselves upon women and end up sexualy assaulting them or worse and it being dismissed as 'typical high-spirited boy behaviour'. Similarly, yelling 'complements' at women from cars or in the street or from building sites. 'just boys being boys, innit'.

If you raise people to believe that their gender/ethnicity/geographical location/social class gives them a free pass on treating others poorly then you're just reinforcing the patriarchy.

From small acorns, mighty oaks to grow."

Surely its up to the parents to teach their kids whats right and wrong, rather then censoring the world to suit

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"'Boys will be boys' is essentially normalising r.a.p.e culture at its most extreme extrapolation.

Oh please. It means nothing of the sort and nor does it suggest such.

Typical of the PC brigade, hasn't anyone got anything of more concern to worry about?"

We could go back to talking about "Swingers or squirrels?" if you wish

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rrol.BMan
over a year ago

Wrexham


"Possibly you've missed the point?

The phrase has been used over the years to make light of, or explain away, many rather heinous actions and activities.

It's on a kids tshirt, my son doesn't know what a heinous crime is, if I buy him this shirt will he go an sexually assault someone?"

I recall a news story from a few years back where the phrase was used to explain the sexual assault of a five year old girl to her mother.

The phrase carries certain connotations for some people and I can understand why someone might get upset.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *RR68BMan
over a year ago

Bournemouth


"'Boys will be boys' is essentially normalising r.a.p.e culture at its most extreme extrapolation.

Oh please. It means nothing of the sort and nor does it suggest such.

Typical of the PC brigade, hasn't anyone got anything of more concern to worry about?

We could go back to talking about "Swingers or squirrels?" if you wish "

LOL I've made my point, whether people agree or not - squirrels it is then!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

What the fuck?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On the fence with this one.

Boys will be boys has been used in the past to gloss over some really quite unsavoury behaviour.

However, it's not the biggest thing in the world to worry about.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago

•+• Access Denied •+•


"not a lot of feminists on here is there?

it's using the excuse that being a douche is ok coz you're male. gender does not explain behaviour.

here's your homework for today, if you don't understand why that phrase is offensive.

what type of behviours are explained away with the phrase 'boys will be boys'?

Zzzzz I find the fact people like you are offended by everything offensive, don't hear me complaining though

i'm not offended by everything.. i am offended that many people think explaining away poor behaviour with the excuse of male gender is stupid thinking.

What kind of poor behaviour are you thinking of, as the poster above said who I agreed with, it means boys going out and getting muddy, cuts and scrapes from falling off their bike etc

my generation explained away male violence with that phrase.

Maybe it's your generation that's the problem then, allow me and my generation to buy our kids what we please without someone getting offended"

firstly, i never wrote that article. secondly i never said don't buy them. i pointed out what is wrong with that phrase.

and maybe it was my generations fault, even wife r@pe was still legal in my time so you know we didn't give ourselves enough rights, that is true. in a subliminal sense it's an offensive phrase, even in the new meaning you accept. what if boys don't like getting covered in shit or hurting themselves by doing 'boy' stuff, are they not 'boys' any more? is a girl who likes doingthis stuff now a boy? we actually used to call girls who did 'typically' boy things a tomboy, implying she was a boy in some sense when she was actually a girl. is it a phrase we really need to encourage when it basically says nothing in the literal sense?

use it if you want. i'm just not old fashioned that's all. i don't believe in traditional roles for children or acting like they should have them.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

In my eyes, that means

Breaking bones whilst climbing trees

Getting covered in mud

Making dens and behaving mischievously.

Not shooting people and crap

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm always curious as to whether these people also object to things that have a poke at men, such as when Coke turned the tables in their ads, and made men into topless sex objects?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"In my eyes, that means

Breaking bones whilst climbing trees

Getting covered in mud

Making dens and behaving mischievously.

Not shooting people and crap "
Yes that's just how I see it . Having had two sons I think of them doing things like that . Nothing bad at all .

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *andemanMan
over a year ago

bedforshire


"Oh well this must mean my t-shirt that says "airbags fitted as standard" is too overly sexual and I'm a walking hindrance on the world whilst wearing it

"

Well if its nice and tight it might breach the highway code as a serious distraction if you walk along the road. Mmmmm

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

I'm sure my boys had tshirts with that on when they were little. I didn't think 'I'd better not get that in case they grow up to be crims' and it didn't cross my mind that some people might get offended by it either

I'm more concerned that retailers make clothes for young girls (8+) that show off to much flesh.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm sure my boys had tshirts with that on when they were little. I didn't think 'I'd better not get that in case they grow up to be crims' and it didn't cross my mind that some people might get offended by it either

I'm more concerned that retailers make clothes for young girls (8+) that show off to much flesh. "

Yes!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah and ban t shirts for three year olds with cheeky monkey written on them!

It only advocates bad manners!

Honestly some of the responses that people have posted from a child's t shirts is beyond me

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he Queen of TartsWoman
Forum Mod
over a year ago

My Own Little World

It's a kids t-shirt. To me the phrase means boys will go out, get dirty, catch frogs, climb trees, jump in puddles..... or am I just old?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *RR68BMan
over a year ago

Bournemouth


"It's a kids t-shirt. To me the phrase means boys will go out, get dirty, catch frogs, climb trees, jump in puddles..... or am I just old? "

Nope, just normal and realistic.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"not a lot of feminists on here is there?

it's using the excuse that being a douche is ok coz you're male. gender does not explain behaviour.

here's your homework for today, if you don't understand why that phrase is offensive.

what type of behviours are explained away with the phrase 'boys will be boys'?

Zzzzz I find the fact people like you are offended by everything offensive, don't hear me complaining though

i'm not offended by everything.. i am offended that many people think explaining away poor behaviour with the excuse of male gender is stupid thinking.

What kind of poor behaviour are you thinking of, as the poster above said who I agreed with, it means boys going out and getting muddy, cuts and scrapes from falling off their bike etc

my generation explained away male violence with that phrase.

Maybe it's your generation that's the problem then, allow me and my generation to buy our kids what we please without someone getting offended

firstly, i never wrote that article. secondly i never said don't buy them. i pointed out what is wrong with that phrase.

and maybe it was my generations fault, even wife r@pe was still legal in my time so you know we didn't give ourselves enough rights, that is true. in a subliminal sense it's an offensive phrase, even in the new meaning you accept. what if boys don't like getting covered in shit or hurting themselves by doing 'boy' stuff, are they not 'boys' any more? is a girl who likes doingthis stuff now a boy? we actually used to call girls who did 'typically' boy things a tomboy, implying she was a boy in some sense when she was actually a girl. is it a phrase we really need to encourage when it basically says nothing in the literal sense?

use it if you want. i'm just not old fashioned that's all. i don't believe in traditional roles for children or acting like they should have them."

I was wondering when someone would pull out the sexism card, such an easy card to play.

I thought your issue was the behaviours that are often explained away with "boys will be boys". Or is it now that it doesnt include girls? Or when boys are not doing typical "boys" things? Or something to do with tomboys?

I don't know. But here's your homework for today, if your going to argue against something, make sure your argument makes sense

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"not a lot of feminists on here is there?

it's using the excuse that being a douche is ok coz you're male. gender does not explain behaviour.

here's your homework for today, if you don't understand why that phrase is offensive.

what type of behviours are explained away with the phrase 'boys will be boys'?

Zzzzz I find the fact people like you are offended by everything offensive, don't hear me complaining though

i'm not offended by everything.. i am offended that many people think explaining away poor behaviour with the excuse of male gender is stupid thinking.

What kind of poor behaviour are you thinking of, as the poster above said who I agreed with, it means boys going out and getting muddy, cuts and scrapes from falling off their bike etc

my generation explained away male violence with that phrase.

Maybe it's your generation that's the problem then, allow me and my generation to buy our kids what we please without someone getting offended

firstly, i never wrote that article. secondly i never said don't buy them. i pointed out what is wrong with that phrase.

and maybe it was my generations fault, even wife r@pe was still legal in my time so you know we didn't give ourselves enough rights, that is true. in a subliminal sense it's an offensive phrase, even in the new meaning you accept. what if boys don't like getting covered in shit or hurting themselves by doing 'boy' stuff, are they not 'boys' any more? is a girl who likes doingthis stuff now a boy? we actually used to call girls who did 'typically' boy things a tomboy, implying she was a boy in some sense when she was actually a girl. is it a phrase we really need to encourage when it basically says nothing in the literal sense?

use it if you want. i'm just not old fashioned that's all. i don't believe in traditional roles for children or acting like they should have them.

I was wondering when someone would pull out the sexism card, such an easy card to play.

I thought your issue was the behaviours that are often explained away with "boys will be boys". Or is it now that it doesnt include girls? Or when boys are not doing typical "boys" things? Or something to do with tomboys?

I don't know. But here's your homework for today, if your going to argue against something, make sure your argument makes sense "

Yes it's true that some boys don't do the things that boys typically like to do. My son is one of those boys in that he dislikes sport, bikes climbing and generally anything physical. Am I offended that there is a generalisation about boys that probably doesn't include my son? Of course not. Will he be offended when he is old enough to understand? I hope not. We've taught him to be proud of who his is and what he's good at. I still believe that most boys will be boys. I don't believe that being a 'typical' boy is a negative thing though.

Mrs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"On a kids t shirt the phrase boys will be boys means to me that boys will get muddy, make a mess, play fight with each other.

I wish my biggest problem in life was being offended by a t shirt. "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's a kids t-shirt. To me the phrase means boys will go out, get dirty, catch frogs, climb trees, jump in puddles..... or am I just old? "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So my beautiful princess t shirts & Princess outfits and sexy lingerie and high heels and jewellery and skirts and dresses - shall we remove those too.....

Perhaps a generic onesie for the whole of the human population would be more suitable for some PC opinionated people

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dumbasses will be dumbasses

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *RR68BMan
over a year ago

Bournemouth


"So my beautiful princess t shirts & Princess outfits and sexy lingerie and high heels and jewellery and skirts and dresses - shall we remove those too?"

I must say it does sound rather tempting

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a negative gender stereotype.

The feminist phrase is 'boys wil be......held accountable for their actions, just like girls'.

It rankles because it is a lame excuse for negative behaviour, and is gender specific. It'd annoy me if I was male, because it removes a male's volition, i.e. it implies that such negative behaviour is unavoidable and expected, purely because someone is male.

I'm sure the lady in Asda didn't have a problem with the words on a child's t-shirt JUST because of the shirt itself. It's just indicative of gender stereotyping, and she saw it as a symptom of a larger issue.

For example, I'd never use the phrase, 'man up!', or 'be a man', to my sons, for the same reason. Men are victims of toxic masculinity, as much as women are.

Imagine a girls t-shirt which read, 'It's ok; I've got my period!'. Would that be ok? No. It's citing gender to both excuse and expect wrongdoing.

It may be seen as 'political correctness gone mad', but people used to say that about racial slurs, and homophobic insults.

Change has to start somewhere.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

Crap if I dress my kid in a rugby kit does that mean he will tackle everyone and be a brute?

Let's all embrace the beige.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"'Boys will be boys' is essentially normalising r.a.p.e culture at its most extreme extrapolation. I'm sure the shirt makers intended it to be taken more as 'boys will play in the mud and eat worms', however.

The dangerous part is where the 'boys' are forcing themselves upon women and end up sexualy assaulting them or worse and it being dismissed as 'typical high-spirited boy behaviour'. Similarly, yelling 'complements' at women from cars or in the street or from building sites. 'just boys being boys, innit'.

If you raise people to believe that their gender/ethnicity/geographical location/social class gives them a free pass on treating others poorly then you're just reinforcing the patriarchy.

From small acorns, mighty oaks to grow."

Yes!

This!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some of you people are just unbelievable

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But Boys WILL be boys though.

I'm sure this is used as a phrase by parents of the kids who act up all the time because they're tired of explaining themselves to other parents etc. I may be wrong, but it seems easier to say boys will be boys rather than 'I'm sorry my son hit your child, we've tried telling him off, disciplining him and everything, but nothing works'

I dunno, may be wrong, don't have kids so wouldn't know.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

do they have the equivalent 'girls will be girls' slogan tshirt?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I personally hate the term Boys will be Boys. Because in my experience, it's used when they are being absolute pigs. And that's not good behaviour to encourage.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The phrase "boys will be boys" creates images of boys climbing trees and getting their clothes dirty and being generally rambunctious. There's nothing sexist about it. A boy will be a boy, it's a cold hard fact of life. The woman has an opinion which she is entitled to, don't buy the bloody t-shirt love but she shouldn't try to force the rest of the world to conform to her opinion.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Some of you people are just unbelievable "
Some just look at the negative But really there is lots of ways you can look at things I find.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"do they have the equivalent 'girls will be girls' slogan tshirt?"
or 'non-binaries will be non-binary'

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Has anyone got an example of some trying to justify r@pe as "oh well. Boys will be boys"

Really struggling to find some that connection can be made to that phrase

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"But Boys WILL be boys though.

I'm sure this is used as a phrase by parents of the kids who act up all the time because they're tired of explaining themselves to other parents etc. I may be wrong, but it seems easier to say boys will be boys rather than 'I'm sorry my son hit your child, we've tried telling him off, disciplining him and everything, but nothing works'

I dunno, may be wrong, don't have kids so wouldn't know. "

This is spot-on, actually. Just shows that you don't have to have had children to understand it.

Among other things, it's a naff excuse for poor parenting. And this is from the mother of 10 and 11 year old boys.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"But Boys WILL be boys though.

I'm sure this is used as a phrase by parents of the kids who act up all the time because they're tired of explaining themselves to other parents etc. I may be wrong, but it seems easier to say boys will be boys rather than 'I'm sorry my son hit your child, we've tried telling him off, disciplining him and everything, but nothing works'

I dunno, may be wrong, don't have kids so wouldn't know.

This is spot-on, actually. Just shows that you don't have to have had children to understand it.

Among other things, it's a naff excuse for poor parenting. And this is from the mother of 10 and 11 year old boys."

Not just a pretty face, eh

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's a negative gender stereotype.

The feminist phrase is 'boys wil be......held accountable for their actions, just like girls'.

It rankles because it is a lame excuse for negative behaviour, and is gender specific. It'd annoy me if I was male, because it removes a male's volition, i.e. it implies that such negative behaviour is unavoidable and expected, purely because someone is male.

I'm sure the lady in Asda didn't have a problem with the words on a child's t-shirt JUST because of the shirt itself. It's just indicative of gender stereotyping, and she saw it as a symptom of a larger issue.

For example, I'd never use the phrase, 'man up!', or 'be a man', to my sons, for the same reason. Men are victims of toxic masculinity, as much as women are.

Imagine a girls t-shirt which read, 'It's ok; I've got my period!'. Would that be ok? No. It's citing gender to both excuse and expect wrongdoing.

It may be seen as 'political correctness gone mad', but people used to say that about racial slurs, and homophobic insults.

Change has to start somewhere.

"

If you had a tshirt that said "It's ok; I've got my period!" I would just assume you've got your period. I wouldn't start a campaign against the shop who sold it because its gender stereotyping or it excuses you of certain behaviour

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"Has anyone got an example of some trying to justify r@pe as "oh well. Boys will be boys"

Really struggling to find some that connection can be made to that phrase"

There was the story about last year the male college that swimmer that had his way with a d*unk college girl behind a dumpster on campus and his parents did use the expression boys will be boys when being interviewed about his case/trial

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have genuinely never seen that as a negative comment whatsoever!

'Boys will be boys' is a light hearted turn of phrase, blown out of proportion only when it is used in the wrong way.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

Google the Stanford student and you'll find it somewhere given the contents of the article Fab wouldn't approve of a link to it being posted

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Has anyone got an example of some trying to justify r@pe as "oh well. Boys will be boys"

Really struggling to find some that connection can be made to that phrase

There was the story about last year the male college that swimmer that had his way with a d*unk college girl behind a dumpster on campus and his parents did use the expression boys will be boys when being interviewed about his case/trial "

And the judge let him off because the judge also used that phrase AND said "he has a bright future as an athlete".

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *avrick15Man
over a year ago

glasgow


"I have genuinely never seen that as a negative comment whatsoever!

'Boys will be boys' is a light hearted turn of phrase, blown out of proportion only when it is used in the wrong way. "

this

Straight to the point like a sexy bullet

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 16/05/17 15:52:54]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Has anyone got an example of some trying to justify r@pe as "oh well. Boys will be boys"

Really struggling to find some that connection can be made to that phrase"

How about, 'what were you wearing, the night you were sexually assaulted?'?

'How much alcohol had you consumed?'

Men are often absolved of accountability due to being unable to control behaviour linked to being male, in other words, their sexual urges.

R@pe culture often blames victims and makes excuses for perpetrators. 'Boys will be boys', paves the way for this, doesn't it?

We raise our daughters to avoid r@pe. But we don't raise our sons NOT to r@pe.

Well, I do. It doesn't make me a feminist bitch.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Has anyone got an example of some trying to justify r@pe as "oh well. Boys will be boys"

Really struggling to find some that connection can be made to that phrase

How about, 'what were you wearing, the night you were sexually assaulted?'?

'How much alcohol had you consumed?'

Men are often absolved of accountability due to being unable to control behaviour linked to being male, in other words, their sexual urges.

R@pe culture often blames victims and makes excuses for perpetrators. 'Boys will be boys', paves the way for this, doesn't it?

We raise our daughters to avoid r@pe. But we don't raise our sons NOT to r@pe.

Well, I do. It doesn't make me a feminist bitch.

"

Here here! I say this all the time and people ignore me for it. You have no idea the disgusting things I have overheard men saying working up my local

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So in conclusion, some find it potentially offensive, and some don't?

For those not offended who see it as light hearted reference to muddy knees, tadpoles in jars and playing games (I'm pretty sure Asda weren't aiming this at misogynistic pigs about to commit heinous crimes) they should crack on and buy it.

For those who are offended by what is quite obviously not intended to cause offence, I'm fairly confident you will wake up tomorrow with no ill effects other than being offended, which I don't think will harm you too much on this occasion.

We all get offended. It doesn't mean everything should change to mert what we want everytime though !!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's a negative gender stereotype.

The feminist phrase is 'boys wil be......held accountable for their actions, just like girls'.

It rankles because it is a lame excuse for negative behaviour, and is gender specific. It'd annoy me if I was male, because it removes a male's volition, i.e. it implies that such negative behaviour is unavoidable and expected, purely because someone is male.

I'm sure the lady in Asda didn't have a problem with the words on a child's t-shirt JUST because of the shirt itself. It's just indicative of gender stereotyping, and she saw it as a symptom of a larger issue.

For example, I'd never use the phrase, 'man up!', or 'be a man', to my sons, for the same reason. Men are victims of toxic masculinity, as much as women are.

Imagine a girls t-shirt which read, 'It's ok; I've got my period!'. Would that be ok? No. It's citing gender to both excuse and expect wrongdoing.

It may be seen as 'political correctness gone mad', but people used to say that about racial slurs, and homophobic insults.

Change has to start somewhere.

If you had a tshirt that said "It's ok; I've got my period!" I would just assume you've got your period. I wouldn't start a campaign against the shop who sold it because its gender stereotyping or it excuses you of certain behaviour"
Us woman get periods ..... But if it said on a tshirt Girls will be Girls it would be ok with me .

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have genuinely never seen that as a negative comment whatsoever!

'Boys will be boys' is a light hearted turn of phrase, blown out of proportion only when it is used in the wrong way.

this

Straight to the point like a sexy bullet "

It's true though, use it in jest and it's all good.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a vague statement

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago

•+• Access Denied •+•


"not a lot of feminists on here is there?

it's using the excuse that being a douche is ok coz you're male. gender does not explain behaviour.

here's your homework for today, if you don't understand why that phrase is offensive.

what type of behviours are explained away with the phrase 'boys will be boys'?

Zzzzz I find the fact people like you are offended by everything offensive, don't hear me complaining though

i'm not offended by everything.. i am offended that many people think explaining away poor behaviour with the excuse of male gender is stupid thinking.

What kind of poor behaviour are you thinking of, as the poster above said who I agreed with, it means boys going out and getting muddy, cuts and scrapes from falling off their bike etc

my generation explained away male violence with that phrase.

Maybe it's your generation that's the problem then, allow me and my generation to buy our kids what we please without someone getting offended

firstly, i never wrote that article. secondly i never said don't buy them. i pointed out what is wrong with that phrase.

and maybe it was my generations fault, even wife r@pe was still legal in my time so you know we didn't give ourselves enough rights, that is true. --in a subliminal sense it's an offensive phrase, even in the new meaning you accept.-- what if boys don't like getting covered in shit or hurting themselves by doing 'boy' stuff, are they not 'boys' any more? is a girl who likes doingthis stuff now a boy? we actually used to call girls who did 'typically' boy things a tomboy, implying she was a boy in some sense when she was actually a girl. is it a phrase we really need to encourage when it basically says nothing in the literal sense?

use it if you want. i'm just not old fashioned that's all. i don't believe in traditional roles for children or acting like they should have them.

I was wondering when someone would pull out the sexism card, such an easy card to play.

I thought your issue was the behaviours that are often explained away with "boys will be boys". Or is it now that it doesnt include girls? Or when boys are not doing typical "boys" things? Or something to do with tomboys?

I don't know. But here's your homework for today, if your going to argue against something, make sure your argument makes sense "

read what i said properly, then reply. i highlighted the bit that will make it more clear (in the best way i can on this site).

i again enforced my argument but also made one against your own additional info. it makes sense.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find it incredible how some people can link "boys will be boys" on a kids tshirt, straight to women getting sexually assaulted

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

From what I can see, everyone has had different experiences with the phrase. But this is my experience with it. I have never heard it being used for boys playing in mud and climbing trees. To me, thats just playing. When I have heard it, its when boys have gotten into fights, beating people up. My nextdoor neighbour used it when we caught her 12 year old son staring into our house. And it wasnt a case of the blinds were open. We had the blinds dropped. He was bending down and sneaking through the gap at the bottom. As I said before, I have only heard it for an excuse for disgusting behaviour, so have never associated it with light hearted fun

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I find it incredible how some people can link "boys will be boys" on a kids tshirt, straight to women getting sexually assaulted"

To be fair, a judge did let a man off for sexual assault once and simply said "Boys will be boys" so I can kind of see a correlation but other than the odd implication, I don't understand the problem with a simple phrase being seen in a negative light

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I find it incredible how some people can link "boys will be boys" on a kids tshirt, straight to women getting sexually assaulted"

Huffington Post quote in an article about bullying, which might help.

"These behaviors need to be addressed, not brushed off or allowed under the guise that it’s just a matter of fact that “boys will be boys.” .....These are the times when we need to say we expect better.

We cannot hand over a free pass for hurting others — and that’s exactly what happens when people say “boys will be boys.”

When people excuse bad behavior by attributing it to “just being boys,” they’re removing personal responsibility. If we don’t hold our kids accountable for their actions, we can’t be surprised at the future results. When young kids are taught that being mean or physical with someone else is basically expected and justified because “boys will be boys,” they learn they don’t have to be accountable for their actions. And, as they get older, they become accustomed to having their inappropriate behaviors exempted and they become bolder and commit more egregious acts."

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I find it incredible how some people can link "boys will be boys" on a kids tshirt, straight to women getting sexually assaulted

To be fair, a judge did let a man off for sexual assault once and simply said "Boys will be boys" so I can kind of see a correlation but other than the odd implication, I don't understand the problem with a simple phrase being seen in a negative light"

Wasn't he let off because the judge said he had a promising sporting career? Could be wrong, i may research it a little more but its still strange to me how having it said in one case can cause a load of commotion over it be written on a tshirt.

It's not as if the tshirt has "Maybe Hitler was right" written across it

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I find it incredible how some people can link "boys will be boys" on a kids tshirt, straight to women getting sexually assaulted"

A lot of kids clothing these days do have overly sexual tones about them, maybe this is the correlation people are making with this slogan?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hortieWoman
over a year ago

Northampton

My thoughts are: There are better things to be worried about

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think this is getting beyond my comprehension. Parents today raise their sons to be respectful to women just as parents raise their daughters to be careful. Parents will also raise their sons to be careful and their daughters to be respectful. I'm saying that as a parent. Reading this thread today is the first I knew that this expression is associated with violent or sexual crime. But I don't feel behaviour typically associated with being a boy has anything to do with violent or sexual crime.

Mrs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I find it incredible how some people can link "boys will be boys" on a kids tshirt, straight to women getting sexually assaulted

To be fair, a judge did let a man off for sexual assault once and simply said "Boys will be boys" so I can kind of see a correlation but other than the odd implication, I don't understand the problem with a simple phrase being seen in a negative light

Wasn't he let off because the judge said he had a promising sporting career? Could be wrong, i may research it a little more but its still strange to me how having it said in one case can cause a load of commotion over it be written on a tshirt.

It's not as if the tshirt has "Maybe Hitler was right" written across it "

He let him off because of both reasons. The "boys will be boys" and the athletic career

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I find it incredible how some people can link "boys will be boys" on a kids tshirt, straight to women getting sexually assaulted

Huffington Post quote in an article about bullying, which might help.

"These behaviors need to be addressed, not brushed off or allowed under the guise that it’s just a matter of fact that “boys will be boys.” .....These are the times when we need to say we expect better.

We cannot hand over a free pass for hurting others — and that’s exactly what happens when people say “boys will be boys.”

When people excuse bad behavior by attributing it to “just being boys,” they’re removing personal responsibility. If we don’t hold our kids accountable for their actions, we can’t be surprised at the future results. When young kids are taught that being mean or physical with someone else is basically expected and justified because “boys will be boys,” they learn they don’t have to be accountable for their actions. And, as they get older, they become accustomed to having their inappropriate behaviors exempted and they become bolder and commit more egregious acts.""

Surely its the parents place to tell them whats right and wrong, and not let our children learn from items of clothing

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Sorry OP but I have had to remove your first post as there was an E-mail address in it. I have copied the rest of your post to post again but sorry all that it is out of sync

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sorry OP but I have had to remove your first post as there was an E-mail address in it. I have copied the rest of your post to post again but sorry all that it is out of sync

"

Ah didn't realise, thank you, noted for next time

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I find it incredible how some people can link "boys will be boys" on a kids tshirt, straight to women getting sexually assaulted

To be fair, a judge did let a man off for sexual assault once and simply said "Boys will be boys" so I can kind of see a correlation but other than the odd implication, I don't understand the problem with a simple phrase being seen in a negative light"

I find that incredible that what I personally see as an innocent phrase, being used in that context, especially by a judge.

Anyone trying to hide behind it to lessen what they've done is disgusting.

A rapist hiding behind the phrase boys will be boys to justify their actions is no different to a terrorist hiding behind religion to justify their actions.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

There was a post going round on facebook last night.

A woman (who isn't on Fab as far as I am aware, but I won't mention her name just in case), shared a photo of a tshirt being sold in Asda with the slogan "boys will be boys" written on it, with the caption

"Quite literally gobsmacked and raging to see this in Asda Huntly! This is so damaging and we cannot possibly still be spouting this nonsense to our children. Links in comments if you'd like to read further on why these 4 words are so problematic. Please email to complain (or tweet/facebook message them) like I have."

What are your thoughts? Will having things like this encourage boys to go out and commit crimes?

My personal thoughts are, the woman wants to get a grip, if her kids are so easily influenced by a tshirt in Asda, then she needs to spend more time teaching her kids the difference between right and wrong.

Your thoughts?"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Girls will be girls would you feel bad about seeing that on a top? I would not care at all . We are all different here and see things different.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I find it incredible how some people can link "boys will be boys" on a kids tshirt, straight to women getting sexually assaulted

To be fair, a judge did let a man off for sexual assault once and simply said "Boys will be boys" so I can kind of see a correlation but other than the odd implication, I don't understand the problem with a simple phrase being seen in a negative light

Wasn't he let off because the judge said he had a promising sporting career? Could be wrong, i may research it a little more but its still strange to me how having it said in one case can cause a load of commotion over it be written on a tshirt.

It's not as if the tshirt has "Maybe Hitler was right" written across it "

It was a different case haha! I wasn't referring to the swimmer.

Do you remember they banned a Walking Dead shirt from Primark because it said 'Eeny meeny miney mo' on it and someone said the next line is a racist slur?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

Bloody hell. That's ridiculous. Bet she's on that mum forum.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I find it incredible how some people can link "boys will be boys" on a kids tshirt, straight to women getting sexually assaulted

Huffington Post quote in an article about bullying, which might help.

"These behaviors need to be addressed, not brushed off or allowed under the guise that it’s just a matter of fact that “boys will be boys.” .....These are the times when we need to say we expect better.

We cannot hand over a free pass for hurting others — and that’s exactly what happens when people say “boys will be boys.”

When people excuse bad behavior by attributing it to “just being boys,” they’re removing personal responsibility. If we don’t hold our kids accountable for their actions, we can’t be surprised at the future results. When young kids are taught that being mean or physical with someone else is basically expected and justified because “boys will be boys,” they learn they don’t have to be accountable for their actions. And, as they get older, they become accustomed to having their inappropriate behaviors exempted and they become bolder and commit more egregious acts."

Surely its the parents place to tell them whats right and wrong, and not let our children learn from items of clothing"

The point is though not all parents know what's right from wrong themselves, hence "the boys will be boys " excuse trotted out to explain away bad behaviour.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I find it incredible how some people can link "boys will be boys" on a kids tshirt, straight to women getting sexually assaulted

To be fair, a judge did let a man off for sexual assault once and simply said "Boys will be boys" so I can kind of see a correlation but other than the odd implication, I don't understand the problem with a simple phrase being seen in a negative light

Wasn't he let off because the judge said he had a promising sporting career? Could be wrong, i may research it a little more but its still strange to me how having it said in one case can cause a load of commotion over it be written on a tshirt.

It's not as if the tshirt has "Maybe Hitler was right" written across it

It was a different case haha! I wasn't referring to the swimmer.

Do you remember they banned a Walking Dead shirt from Primark because it said 'Eeny meeny miney mo' on it and someone said the next line is a racist slur?"

I heard that yes, that may be an argument for another thread. But we used to sing eeny meeny miney mo in school, but we used to catch a tiger by its toe

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

Personally, I see it as a non gender specific, generic statement meaning people are what they are and, is therefore a positive message. In the same way feminism isn't just about women; it stands for the freedoms and rights of all. I'm a feminist!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

My thoughts are, I didn't read it as negative. I am guessing some people may just look for the negative in everything

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You can see from the thread only a couple of people have been influenced by a couple of others using the phrase where it had zero relevance really

Which is a good thing because it is total BS and really doesn't need to be read into that much

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I find it incredible how some people can link "boys will be boys" on a kids tshirt, straight to women getting sexually assaulted

To be fair, a judge did let a man off for sexual assault once and simply said "Boys will be boys" so I can kind of see a correlation but other than the odd implication, I don't understand the problem with a simple phrase being seen in a negative light

Wasn't he let off because the judge said he had a promising sporting career? Could be wrong, i may research it a little more but its still strange to me how having it said in one case can cause a load of commotion over it be written on a tshirt.

It's not as if the tshirt has "Maybe Hitler was right" written across it

It was a different case haha! I wasn't referring to the swimmer.

Do you remember they banned a Walking Dead shirt from Primark because it said 'Eeny meeny miney mo' on it and someone said the next line is a racist slur?

I heard that yes, that may be an argument for another thread. But we used to sing eeny meeny miney mo in school, but we used to catch a tiger by its toe"

Neegan said 'catch a tiger by the toe' as well!

So called 'political correctness' is having a seriously twisted effect on the western world

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Bloody hell. That's ridiculous. Bet she's on that mum forum. "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"People like this need put down "
I like being a boy and I dont want to be put down for it .......ive still got a few years left in me yet

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My thoughts are, I didn't read it as negative. I am guessing some people may just look for the negative in everything"

Or a case of we have only heard it being used in a negative sense. Sayongs mutate over time. For me, that phrase has only been used for when men are being crude and negative. But for others its being used when its light hearted fun. Different situations. Different experiences

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If there was a t-shirt with something racist or anti-Semitic on it, would you say that it was the parent's responsibility to teach the child right and wrong, so the t-shirt is harmless?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I find it incredible how some people can link "boys will be boys" on a kids tshirt, straight to women getting sexually assaulted

Huffington Post quote in an article about bullying, which might help.

"These behaviors need to be addressed, not brushed off or allowed under the guise that it’s just a matter of fact that “boys will be boys.” .....These are the times when we need to say we expect better.

We cannot hand over a free pass for hurting others — and that’s exactly what happens when people say “boys will be boys.”

When people excuse bad behavior by attributing it to “just being boys,” they’re removing personal responsibility. If we don’t hold our kids accountable for their actions, we can’t be surprised at the future results. When young kids are taught that being mean or physical with someone else is basically expected and justified because “boys will be boys,” they learn they don’t have to be accountable for their actions. And, as they get older, they become accustomed to having their inappropriate behaviors exempted and they become bolder and commit more egregious acts."

Surely its the parents place to tell them whats right and wrong, and not let our children learn from items of clothing

The point is though not all parents know what's right from wrong themselves, hence "the boys will be boys " excuse trotted out to explain away bad behaviour."

Then they should learn instead of trying to censor the world

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If there was a t-shirt with something racist or anti-Semitic on it, would you say that it was the parent's responsibility to teach the child right and wrong, so the t-shirt is harmless?"
like once you have black you never want black?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If there was a t-shirt with something racist or anti-Semitic on it, would you say that it was the parent's responsibility to teach the child right and wrong, so the t-shirt is harmless?"

I would teach my child whats right and wrong. I agree the tshirt would be wrong as its a directly aimed towards a race or religion. But it is 100% my job as a parent to teach my child how the world works so he has a full understanding

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've personally heard "boys will be boys" used as a excuse for appalling behaviour. And there's still a culture of excusing awful behaviour from boys/men.

Climbing trees, getting muddy, catching tadpolrs ate all CHILDREN'S behaviour. So write a tshirt saying kids will be kids.

And yes, I would disagree with a female alternative. Why should behaviour be excused by gender? Why not just be decent people?

To other conments... of course I raise my children to think of their behaviour and impact on others. But 1 voice against a widely accepted culture can only do so much.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I find it incredible how some people can link "boys will be boys" on a kids tshirt, straight to women getting sexually assaulted

Huffington Post quote in an article about bullying, which might help.

"These behaviors need to be addressed, not brushed off or allowed under the guise that it’s just a matter of fact that “boys will be boys.” .....These are the times when we need to say we expect better.

We cannot hand over a free pass for hurting others — and that’s exactly what happens when people say “boys will be boys.”

When people excuse bad behavior by attributing it to “just being boys,” they’re removing personal responsibility. If we don’t hold our kids accountable for their actions, we can’t be surprised at the future results. When young kids are taught that being mean or physical with someone else is basically expected and justified because “boys will be boys,” they learn they don’t have to be accountable for their actions. And, as they get older, they become accustomed to having their inappropriate behaviors exempted and they become bolder and commit more egregious acts."

Surely its the parents place to tell them whats right and wrong, and not let our children learn from items of clothing

The point is though not all parents know what's right from wrong themselves, hence "the boys will be boys " excuse trotted out to explain away bad behaviour.

Then they should learn instead of trying to censor the world "

Exactly. Instead of tearing it off of the shelves, Primark should have made the point of explaining the actual nursery rhyme as opposed to the offensive re-write.

We need to stop bowing down to the people who get offended by everything. Not everything is offensive or is meant with malicious intent.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've personally heard "boys will be boys" used as a excuse for appalling behaviour. And there's still a culture of excusing awful behaviour from boys/men.

Climbing trees, getting muddy, catching tadpolrs ate all CHILDREN'S behaviour. So write a tshirt saying kids will be kids.

And yes, I would disagree with a female alternative. Why should behaviour be excused by gender? Why not just be decent people?

To other conments... of course I raise my children to think of their behaviour and impact on others. But 1 voice against a widely accepted culture can only do so much. "

This!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I find it incredible how some people can link "boys will be boys" on a kids tshirt, straight to women getting sexually assaulted"

I'm with you, it is a pathetic response by the man hating brigade. A child's t-shirt with an innocent phrase on obviously means that we all condone r@pe and even bring our sons up to be r@pists. Complete and utter nonsense.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *avrick15Man
over a year ago

glasgow


"My thoughts are: There are better things to be worried about "

This too...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If there was a t-shirt with something racist or anti-Semitic on it, would you say that it was the parent's responsibility to teach the child right and wrong, so the t-shirt is harmless?

I would teach my child whats right and wrong. I agree the tshirt would be wrong as its a directly aimed towards a race or religion. But it is 100% my job as a parent to teach my child how the world works so he has a full understanding"

If you'd explained to your son about being accountable for his actions, you wouldn't then dress him in a t-shirt that said otherwise, would you?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago

•+• Access Denied •+•


"I've personally heard "boys will be boys" used as a excuse for appalling behaviour. And there's still a culture of excusing awful behaviour from boys/men.

Climbing trees, getting muddy, catching tadpolrs ate all CHILDREN'S behaviour. So write a tshirt saying kids will be kids.

And yes, I would disagree with a female alternative. Why should behaviour be excused by gender? Why not just be decent people?

To other conments... of course I raise my children to think of their behaviour and impact on others. But 1 voice against a widely accepted culture can only do so much.

This! "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are two sexes in this world, girls and boys and there are clear differences between the two. They were designed in such a way by nature. We don't live in a gender neutral world and I for one don't bloody want to. I like the differences between girls and boys. And why does "boys will be boys" have to be negative.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I find it incredible how some people can link "boys will be boys" on a kids tshirt, straight to women getting sexually assaulted

Huffington Post quote in an article about bullying, which might help.

"These behaviors need to be addressed, not brushed off or allowed under the guise that it’s just a matter of fact that “boys will be boys.” .....These are the times when we need to say we expect better.

We cannot hand over a free pass for hurting others — and that’s exactly what happens when people say “boys will be boys.”

When people excuse bad behavior by attributing it to “just being boys,” they’re removing personal responsibility. If we don’t hold our kids accountable for their actions, we can’t be surprised at the future results. When young kids are taught that being mean or physical with someone else is basically expected and justified because “boys will be boys,” they learn they don’t have to be accountable for their actions. And, as they get older, they become accustomed to having their inappropriate behaviors exempted and they become bolder and commit more egregious acts."

Surely its the parents place to tell them whats right and wrong, and not let our children learn from items of clothing

The point is though not all parents know what's right from wrong themselves, hence "the boys will be boys " excuse trotted out to explain away bad behaviour.

Then they should learn instead of trying to censor the world "

You can't teach people who think they're right even though they're wrong.

Anyway it's an interesting debate, for some people it lies much deeper than just a slogan on a t-shirt for others it's a bit of harmless fun.

We're all different.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If there was a t-shirt with something racist or anti-Semitic on it, would you say that it was the parent's responsibility to teach the child right and wrong, so the t-shirt is harmless?

I would teach my child whats right and wrong. I agree the tshirt would be wrong as its a directly aimed towards a race or religion. But it is 100% my job as a parent to teach my child how the world works so he has a full understanding

If you'd explained to your son about being accountable for his actions, you wouldn't then dress him in a t-shirt that said otherwise, would you?"

He already has a t shirt that says "boys will be boys" thats one of the main reason I brought the subject up.

So far, he hasn't used it as an excuse for any sexual assaults or otherwise bad behaviour

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If there was a t-shirt with something racist or anti-Semitic on it, would you say that it was the parent's responsibility to teach the child right and wrong, so the t-shirt is harmless?"

Something racist would be unacceptable. Racism has caused physical and mental harm to individual people, caused human beings to not have equal opportunities and generally affected basic human rights. I'm afraid it's beyond my comprehension as to how 'saying that boys will be boys' is on a similar level such that human rights are effected. However I will stress that if that expression had been used to defend serious bad behaviour from young men, that that is very wrong.

Mrs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I find it incredible how some people can link "boys will be boys" on a kids tshirt, straight to women getting sexually assaulted

Huffington Post quote in an article about bullying, which might help.

"These behaviors need to be addressed, not brushed off or allowed under the guise that it’s just a matter of fact that “boys will be boys.” .....These are the times when we need to say we expect better.

We cannot hand over a free pass for hurting others — and that’s exactly what happens when people say “boys will be boys.”

When people excuse bad behavior by attributing it to “just being boys,” they’re removing personal responsibility. If we don’t hold our kids accountable for their actions, we can’t be surprised at the future results. When young kids are taught that being mean or physical with someone else is basically expected and justified because “boys will be boys,” they learn they don’t have to be accountable for their actions. And, as they get older, they become accustomed to having their inappropriate behaviors exempted and they become bolder and commit more egregious acts."

Surely its the parents place to tell them whats right and wrong, and not let our children learn from items of clothing

The point is though not all parents know what's right from wrong themselves, hence "the boys will be boys " excuse trotted out to explain away bad behaviour.

Then they should learn instead of trying to censor the world

You can't teach people who think they're right even though they're wrong.

Anyway it's an interesting debate, for some people it lies much deeper than just a slogan on a t-shirt for others it's a bit of harmless fun.

We're all different."

We are, but at the end of the day, it really is just words on a shirt, its not aimed at any victims or any specific demographs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There are two sexes in this world, girls and boys and there are clear differences between the two. They were designed in such a way by nature. We don't live in a gender neutral world and I for one don't bloody want to. I like the differences between girls and boys. And why does "boys will be boys" have to be negative. "

Because it's been used to explain away awful behaviour.

By all means reclaim it and make it something beautiful and positive.

But when it comes to children, what do you consider to be exclusively boys' behaviour?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I find it incredible how some people can link "boys will be boys" on a kids tshirt, straight to women getting sexually assaulted

Huffington Post quote in an article about bullying, which might help.

"These behaviors need to be addressed, not brushed off or allowed under the guise that it’s just a matter of fact that “boys will be boys.” .....These are the times when we need to say we expect better.

We cannot hand over a free pass for hurting others — and that’s exactly what happens when people say “boys will be boys.”

When people excuse bad behavior by attributing it to “just being boys,” they’re removing personal responsibility. If we don’t hold our kids accountable for their actions, we can’t be surprised at the future results. When young kids are taught that being mean or physical with someone else is basically expected and justified because “boys will be boys,” they learn they don’t have to be accountable for their actions. And, as they get older, they become accustomed to having their inappropriate behaviors exempted and they become bolder and commit more egregious acts."

Surely its the parents place to tell them whats right and wrong, and not let our children learn from items of clothing

The point is though not all parents know what's right from wrong themselves, hence "the boys will be boys " excuse trotted out to explain away bad behaviour.

Then they should learn instead of trying to censor the world

You can't teach people who think they're right even though they're wrong.

Anyway it's an interesting debate, for some people it lies much deeper than just a slogan on a t-shirt for others it's a bit of harmless fun.

We're all different.

We are, but at the end of the day, it really is just words on a shirt, its not aimed at any victims or any specific demographs"

Words reflecting a wider culture ansmd acceptance of behaviours that surely, as parents, should be actively worked against?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If there was a t-shirt with something racist or anti-Semitic on it, would you say that it was the parent's responsibility to teach the child right and wrong, so the t-shirt is harmless?

Something racist would be unacceptable. Racism has caused physical and mental harm to individual people, caused human beings to not have equal opportunities and generally affected basic human rights. I'm afraid it's beyond my comprehension as to how 'saying that boys will be boys' is on a similar level such that human rights are effected. However I will stress that if that expression had been used to defend serious bad behaviour from young men, that that is very wrong.

Mrs"

Completely agree, the judge was very wrong to use it as an reason for letting the lad off with such a bad crime.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Boys will be boys is a well know idiom but there isn't really a GWBG counterpart.... does it stem from the 'sugar & spice & all things nice, boys are from snails & puppy dog tales' in times past?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icketyClitWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

FFS to this whole thing - the world has gone PC mad!!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There are two sexes in this world, girls and boys and there are clear differences between the two. They were designed in such a way by nature. We don't live in a gender neutral world and I for one don't bloody want to. I like the differences between girls and boys. And why does "boys will be boys" have to be negative.

Because it's been used to explain away awful behaviour.

By all means reclaim it and make it something beautiful and positive.

But when it comes to children, what do you consider to be exclusively boys' behaviour?"

There is no gender exclusive behaviour, but sterotypically, boys (young children) behaviour means getting dirty, cuts and scraps from building ramps for their bike, collecting tad poles in jars.

Obviously girls can also do this and I imagine a lot do. But surely its seen as more boy behaviour then girl behaviour. To me, thats all the tshirt is saying

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I find it incredible how some people can link "boys will be boys" on a kids tshirt, straight to women getting sexually assaulted

Huffington Post quote in an article about bullying, which might help.

"These behaviors need to be addressed, not brushed off or allowed under the guise that it’s just a matter of fact that “boys will be boys.” .....These are the times when we need to say we expect better.

We cannot hand over a free pass for hurting others — and that’s exactly what happens when people say “boys will be boys.”

When people excuse bad behavior by attributing it to “just being boys,” they’re removing personal responsibility. If we don’t hold our kids accountable for their actions, we can’t be surprised at the future results. When young kids are taught that being mean or physical with someone else is basically expected and justified because “boys will be boys,” they learn they don’t have to be accountable for their actions. And, as they get older, they become accustomed to having their inappropriate behaviors exempted and they become bolder and commit more egregious acts."

Surely its the parents place to tell them whats right and wrong, and not let our children learn from items of clothing

The point is though not all parents know what's right from wrong themselves, hence "the boys will be boys " excuse trotted out to explain away bad behaviour.

Then they should learn instead of trying to censor the world

You can't teach people who think they're right even though they're wrong.

Anyway it's an interesting debate, for some people it lies much deeper than just a slogan on a t-shirt for others it's a bit of harmless fun.

We're all different.

We are, but at the end of the day, it really is just words on a shirt, its not aimed at any victims or any specific demographs"

In the context of a slogan on a kids t-shirt I wouldn't see it a negative way, I'd see it in the same vein as a 'cheeky monkey' for example.

It would be different if it was aimed at teenagers but I'm pretty sure it's meant for the younger child.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is a childrens book called "boys are stupid, throw rocks at them" its even written on girls tshirts

Surely that's promoting worse behaviour than "boys will be boys"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There are two sexes in this world, girls and boys and there are clear differences between the two. They were designed in such a way by nature. We don't live in a gender neutral world and I for one don't bloody want to. I like the differences between girls and boys. And why does "boys will be boys" have to be negative.

Because it's been used to explain away awful behaviour.

By all means reclaim it and make it something beautiful and positive.

But when it comes to children, what do you consider to be exclusively boys' behaviour?

There is no gender exclusive behaviour, but sterotypically, boys (young children) behaviour means getting dirty, cuts and scraps from building ramps for their bike, collecting tad poles in jars.

Obviously girls can also do this and I imagine a lot do. But surely its seen as more boy behaviour then girl behaviour. To me, thats all the tshirt is saying"

So reinforcing stereotypes is healthy?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There are two sexes in this world, girls and boys and there are clear differences between the two. They were designed in such a way by nature. We don't live in a gender neutral world and I for one don't bloody want to. I like the differences between girls and boys. And why does "boys will be boys" have to be negative.

Because it's been used to explain away awful behaviour.

By all means reclaim it and make it something beautiful and positive.

But when it comes to children, what do you consider to be exclusively boys' behaviour?"

We are talking about the phrase printed on a kids t-shirt in Asda. Not the misuses of the phrase itself. And who mentioned exclusive behaviour. I said there are clear differences between girls and boys and you can argue with that fact because it's true. The world has gone mad.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There are two sexes in this world, girls and boys and there are clear differences between the two. They were designed in such a way by nature. We don't live in a gender neutral world and I for one don't bloody want to. I like the differences between girls and boys. And why does "boys will be boys" have to be negative.

Because it's been used to explain away awful behaviour.

By all means reclaim it and make it something beautiful and positive.

But when it comes to children, what do you consider to be exclusively boys' behaviour?"

The number of times my mother took my brother to A&E for treatment for minor injuries. She never had to with me. The same applies to my son and daughter. I think the view was that 'boys will be boys' however sexist that may be and disregarding of the girls who were greater risk takers or the boys who were more cautious.

Mrs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There are two sexes in this world, girls and boys and there are clear differences between the two. They were designed in such a way by nature. We don't live in a gender neutral world and I for one don't bloody want to. I like the differences between girls and boys. And why does "boys will be boys" have to be negative.

Because it's been used to explain away awful behaviour.

By all means reclaim it and make it something beautiful and positive.

But when it comes to children, what do you consider to be exclusively boys' behaviour?

There is no gender exclusive behaviour, but sterotypically, boys (young children) behaviour means getting dirty, cuts and scraps from building ramps for their bike, collecting tad poles in jars.

Obviously girls can also do this and I imagine a lot do. But surely its seen as more boy behaviour then girl behaviour. To me, thats all the tshirt is saying

So reinforcing stereotypes is healthy?"

No need to twist words, I didn't say anything like that and I didn't create the sterotype, its just how things are and have been for a very long time

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Boys will be boys is a well know idiom but there isn't really a GWBG counterpart.... does it stem from the 'sugar & spice & all things nice, boys are from snails & puppy dog tales' in times past? "
nope its not from that at all its from the song boys will be boys

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There are two sexes in this world, girls and boys and there are clear differences between the two. They were designed in such a way by nature. We don't live in a gender neutral world and I for one don't bloody want to. I like the differences between girls and boys. And why does "boys will be boys" have to be negative.

Because it's been used to explain away awful behaviour.

By all means reclaim it and make it something beautiful and positive.

But when it comes to children, what do you consider to be exclusively boys' behaviour?

The number of times my mother took my brother to A&E for treatment for minor injuries. She never had to with me. The same applies to my son and daughter. I think the view was that 'boys will be boys' however sexist that may be and disregarding of the girls who were greater risk takers or the boys who were more cautious.

Mrs"

So not exclusive to a gender....

...no-one is denying traits. I have one of each. I'm aware of their differences. I'm also aware of their similarities!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There are two sexes in this world, girls and boys and there are clear differences between the two. They were designed in such a way by nature. We don't live in a gender neutral world and I for one don't bloody want to. I like the differences between girls and boys. And why does "boys will be boys" have to be negative.

Because it's been used to explain away awful behaviour.

By all means reclaim it and make it something beautiful and positive.

But when it comes to children, what do you consider to be exclusively boys' behaviour?

There is no gender exclusive behaviour, but sterotypically, boys (young children) behaviour means getting dirty, cuts and scraps from building ramps for their bike, collecting tad poles in jars.

Obviously girls can also do this and I imagine a lot do. But surely its seen as more boy behaviour then girl behaviour. To me, thats all the tshirt is saying

So reinforcing stereotypes is healthy?

No need to twist words, I didn't say anything like that and I didn't create the sterotype, its just how things are and have been for a very long time"

I'm not twisting, i'm clarifying.

"It's how things are and have been for a very long time" when it cones to issues of gender is generally negative, though.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Boys will be boys and I smile at the things my mum and gran would say to them as boys. Now grown up and become men and I feel I have done a good job and given them a positive out look on life.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There are two sexes in this world, girls and boys and there are clear differences between the two. They were designed in such a way by nature. We don't live in a gender neutral world and I for one don't bloody want to. I like the differences between girls and boys. And why does "boys will be boys" have to be negative.

Because it's been used to explain away awful behaviour.

By all means reclaim it and make it something beautiful and positive.

But when it comes to children, what do you consider to be exclusively boys' behaviour?

The number of times my mother took my brother to A&E for treatment for minor injuries. She never had to with me. The same applies to my son and daughter. I think the view was that 'boys will be boys' however sexist that may be and disregarding of the girls who were greater risk takers or the boys who were more cautious.

Mrs

So not exclusive to a gender....

...no-one is denying traits. I have one of each. I'm aware of their differences. I'm also aware of their similarities!"

I guess it's a question of whether the tee shirt is suggesting a trait that is exclusive to gender or just typical of gender.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There are two sexes in this world, girls and boys and there are clear differences between the two. They were designed in such a way by nature. We don't live in a gender neutral world and I for one don't bloody want to. I like the differences between girls and boys. And why does "boys will be boys" have to be negative.

Because it's been used to explain away awful behaviour.

By all means reclaim it and make it something beautiful and positive.

But when it comes to children, what do you consider to be exclusively boys' behaviour?

The number of times my mother took my brother to A&E for treatment for minor injuries. She never had to with me. The same applies to my son and daughter. I think the view was that 'boys will be boys' however sexist that may be and disregarding of the girls who were greater risk takers or the boys who were more cautious.

Mrs

So not exclusive to a gender....

...no-one is denying traits. I have one of each. I'm aware of their differences. I'm also aware of their similarities!

I guess it's a question of whether the tee shirt is suggesting a trait that is exclusive to gender or just typical of gender. "

I'd say it's typical of that gender but then that depends on what you think a typical boy trait is.....

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There are two sexes in this world, girls and boys and there are clear differences between the two. They were designed in such a way by nature. We don't live in a gender neutral world and I for one don't bloody want to. I like the differences between girls and boys. And why does "boys will be boys" have to be negative.

Because it's been used to explain away awful behaviour.

By all means reclaim it and make it something beautiful and positive.

But when it comes to children, what do you consider to be exclusively boys' behaviour?

The number of times my mother took my brother to A&E for treatment for minor injuries. She never had to with me. The same applies to my son and daughter. I think the view was that 'boys will be boys' however sexist that may be and disregarding of the girls who were greater risk takers or the boys who were more cautious.

Mrs

So not exclusive to a gender....

...no-one is denying traits. I have one of each. I'm aware of their differences. I'm also aware of their similarities!

I guess it's a question of whether the tee shirt is suggesting a trait that is exclusive to gender or just typical of gender. "

To which i'd question why make it gender specific at all. Our desire to pack people in neat little boxes I guess.

My girl is no less a girl for climbing a trees. My boy is no less a boy for *insert overly stereotypical girl thing here* and it makes me sad they've already come up against this.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There are two sexes in this world, girls and boys and there are clear differences between the two. They were designed in such a way by nature. We don't live in a gender neutral world and I for one don't bloody want to. I like the differences between girls and boys. And why does "boys will be boys" have to be negative.

Because it's been used to explain away awful behaviour.

By all means reclaim it and make it something beautiful and positive.

But when it comes to children, what do you consider to be exclusively boys' behaviour?

The number of times my mother took my brother to A&E for treatment for minor injuries. She never had to with me. The same applies to my son and daughter. I think the view was that 'boys will be boys' however sexist that may be and disregarding of the girls who were greater risk takers or the boys who were more cautious.

Mrs

So not exclusive to a gender....

...no-one is denying traits. I have one of each. I'm aware of their differences. I'm also aware of their similarities!

I guess it's a question of whether the tee shirt is suggesting a trait that is exclusive to gender or just typical of gender.

To which i'd question why make it gender specific at all. Our desire to pack people in neat little boxes I guess.

My girl is no less a girl for climbing a trees. My boy is no less a boy for *insert overly stereotypical girl thing here* and it makes me sad they've already come up against this."

May I ask why you wear ladies underwear and ladies clothes? If you want to live in world where there is no distinction between male and female then why not just wear a plain old boiler suit and shave your head so nobody can tell if you are male or female.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The world has gone fucking nuts

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The world has gone fucking mad "

FTFY, more gender neutral

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The world has gone fucking nuts "

I second that motion.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The world has gone fucking nuts

I second that motion. "
I think of all the other things in the world people could get upset about then this boys will be boys........... boys and girls no food no homes no mum and dads and no health care no nothing ....... wars killing people I could go on and on .

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The world has gone fucking mad

FTFY, more gender neutral "

Cheers!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *unandbuckCouple
over a year ago

Sheffield

Some complete insane over-reaction to this.

At no time, ever has anyone reacted to sexual violence with the comment 'ooh boys will be boys' . The ability to find offence is staggering.

As others have said, for youngsters it is about the wonder of childhood, involving getting mucky, collecting spiders etc

At it's eldest extreme it could be used for stag night d*unkeness and the grooms visit to a strip club.

In no way does it condone sexual violence or abuse of women.

It's a pity one womans rant has received any level of publicity.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There are two sexes in this world, girls and boys and there are clear differences between the two. They were designed in such a way by nature. We don't live in a gender neutral world and I for one don't bloody want to. I like the differences between girls and boys. And why does "boys will be boys" have to be negative.

Because it's been used to explain away awful behaviour.

By all means reclaim it and make it something beautiful and positive.

But when it comes to children, what do you consider to be exclusively boys' behaviour?

The number of times my mother took my brother to A&E for treatment for minor injuries. She never had to with me. The same applies to my son and daughter. I think the view was that 'boys will be boys' however sexist that may be and disregarding of the girls who were greater risk takers or the boys who were more cautious.

Mrs

So not exclusive to a gender....

...no-one is denying traits. I have one of each. I'm aware of their differences. I'm also aware of their similarities!

I guess it's a question of whether the tee shirt is suggesting a trait that is exclusive to gender or just typical of gender.

To which i'd question why make it gender specific at all. Our desire to pack people in neat little boxes I guess.

My girl is no less a girl for climbing a trees. My boy is no less a boy for *insert overly stereotypical girl thing here* and it makes me sad they've already come up against this.

May I ask why you wear ladies underwear and ladies clothes? If you want to live in world where there is no distinction between male and female then why not just wear a plain old boiler suit and shave your head so nobody can tell if you are male or female. "

Did I at ANY point say there is no difference?

Did I, at ANY point, make this about adult physical differences?

You have seen a brief snapshot of me. You've assumed a lot. I own and wear men's clothes. I've had short hair. I am not afraid to be judged on how I act rather than how I look.

We all make assumptions based on the information in front of us. The ability to question that makes us better. To divide by a sex makes us worse.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The world has gone fucking nuts

I second that motion. I think of all the other things in the world people could get upset about then this boys will be boys........... boys and girls no food no homes no mum and dads and no health care no nothing ....... wars killing people I could go on and on ."

They're not mutually exclusive. Compassion and awareness are not solely fixed on one thing at a time. On the contrary, when you notice a big problem, all too often you find the little things that lead there

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The world has gone fucking mad

FTFY, more gender neutral "

I know, right. Imagine questioning things that "just are"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"I find it incredible how some people can link "boys will be boys" on a kids tshirt, straight to women getting sexually assaulted

Huffington Post quote in an article about bullying, which might help.

"These behaviors need to be addressed, not brushed off or allowed under the guise that it’s just a matter of fact that “boys will be boys.” .....These are the times when we need to say we expect better.

We cannot hand over a free pass for hurting others — and that’s exactly what happens when people say “boys will be boys.”

When people excuse bad behavior by attributing it to “just being boys,” they’re removing personal responsibility. If we don’t hold our kids accountable for their actions, we can’t be surprised at the future results. When young kids are taught that being mean or physical with someone else is basically expected and justified because “boys will be boys,” they learn they don’t have to be accountable for their actions. And, as they get older, they become accustomed to having their inappropriate behaviors exempted and they become bolder and commit more egregious acts.""

This is a valid point - it is a societal problem, the old' 'Oh he was just thinking with his cock' excuse.

I would assume on a kids t-shirt it referred to getting muddy etc, and I would not be offended by it, BUT, it does raise the question of the wider meaning of the phrase - which is a valid debate.

'Boys will be boys' IS used to excuse men of irresponsible behaviour, I've heard it, even on fabs.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Some complete insane over-reaction to this.

At no time, ever has anyone reacted to sexual violence with the comment 'ooh boys will be boys' . The ability to find offence is staggering.

As others have said, for youngsters it is about the wonder of childhood, involving getting mucky, collecting spiders etc

At it's eldest extreme it could be used for stag night d*unkeness and the grooms visit to a strip club.

In no way does it condone sexual violence or abuse of women.

It's a pity one womans rant has received any level of publicity.

"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eryCuriousCouple2012Couple
over a year ago

Funville

Boys will be boys.

Girls just wanna have fun.

The same thing said a slightly different way imo.

Anything can be construed as being offensive to someone, a little common sense has to be used at some point surely?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The world has gone fucking mad

FTFY, more gender neutral

I know, right. Imagine questioning things that "just are""

I wasn't questioning. I was just taking the piss

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just this afternoon, I was in a conversation with a woman, and as part of the conversation she described herself as 'girly'. When she said that it reminded me of the thread. After all what is looking or behaving 'girly'? I knew what she meant. But as there is not an image or behaviour that is exclusively associated with girls, and that not all girls will fit in with this stereotypical image of 'girliness', should these expressions be ruled out. Should it also become non-PC to describe a boy or man as macho? Personally this is not a direction I would want to see society go in. But sometimes I fear it will.

Mrs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've personally heard "boys will be boys" used as a excuse for appalling behaviour. And there's still a culture of excusing awful behaviour from boys/men.

Climbing trees, getting muddy, catching tadpolrs ate all CHILDREN'S behaviour. So write a tshirt saying kids will be kids.

And yes, I would disagree with a female alternative. Why should behaviour be excused by gender? Why not just be decent people?

To other conments... of course I raise my children to think of their behaviour and impact on others. But 1 voice against a widely accepted culture can only do so much. "

Totally agree

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've personally heard "boys will be boys" used as a excuse for appalling behaviour. And there's still a culture of excusing awful behaviour from boys/men.

Climbing trees, getting muddy, catching tadpolrs ate all CHILDREN'S behaviour. So write a tshirt saying kids will be kids.

And yes, I would disagree with a female alternative. Why should behaviour be excused by gender? Why not just be decent people?

To other conments... of course I raise my children to think of their behaviour and impact on others. But 1 voice against a widely accepted culture can only do so much.

Totally agree

"

I agree to an extent. I'm a 30 year old male who works all the hours God sends, I'm not racist, sexist or homophobic, I help my friends, family and even strangers if I'm in a position to do so. I may not be with the mother of my son anymore but I still have lots of involvement in my child's life. Even my ex who hates me tells people I'm a great father

All these things that I am were what I got off my parents. My parents spoke to me, helped me and taught me growing up, they didn't go out shouting and ranting at anything they didn't agree with that I could have seen.

So yea, one voice in the world can make a big difference

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford


"It's a kids t-shirt. To me the phrase means boys will go out, get dirty, catch frogs, climb trees, jump in puddles..... or am I just old? "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *callycatMan
over a year ago

Mid Wales


"It's a kids t-shirt. To me the phrase means boys will go out, get dirty, catch frogs, climb trees, jump in puddles..... or am I just old?

"

I too have a t shirt worn especially for reading forum threads...it says "I'm awesome but everyone else is an arse"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

https://youtu.be/iKcWu0tsiZM

Modern educayshun.

I don't necessarily agree with all of what's said in this clip. But food for thought for those who can be bothered to look.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've personally heard "boys will be boys" used as a excuse for appalling behaviour. And there's still a culture of excusing awful behaviour from boys/men.

Climbing trees, getting muddy, catching tadpolrs ate all CHILDREN'S behaviour. So write a tshirt saying kids will be kids.

And yes, I would disagree with a female alternative. Why should behaviour be excused by gender? Why not just be decent people?

To other conments... of course I raise my children to think of their behaviour and impact on others. But 1 voice against a widely accepted culture can only do so much.

Totally agree

I agree to an extent. I'm a 30 year old male who works all the hours God sends, I'm not racist, sexist or homophobic, I help my friends, family and even strangers if I'm in a position to do so. I may not be with the mother of my son anymore but I still have lots of involvement in my child's life. Even my ex who hates me tells people I'm a great father

All these things that I am were what I got off my parents. My parents spoke to me, helped me and taught me growing up, they didn't go out shouting and ranting at anything they didn't agree with that I could have seen.

So yea, one voice in the world can make a big difference"

And sometimes for the worse.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The world has gone fucking nuts

I second that motion. I think of all the other things in the world people could get upset about then this boys will be boys........... boys and girls no food no homes no mum and dads and no health care no nothing ....... wars killing people I could go on and on .

They're not mutually exclusive. Compassion and awareness are not solely fixed on one thing at a time. On the contrary, when you notice a big problem, all too often you find the little things that lead there"
Boys are children not men .......... when a boy get older he become a man and that top is for a child not a man . Its fixed in my mind kids being killed no food nothing not this sad story of a childs top on the net from a very sad woman She needs to get a life. Next thing you will be saying Brownies and Girlguids in UK; for girl should be Boys too .

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The world has gone fucking nuts

I second that motion. I think of all the other things in the world people could get upset about then this boys will be boys........... boys and girls no food no homes no mum and dads and no health care no nothing ....... wars killing people I could go on and on .

They're not mutually exclusive. Compassion and awareness are not solely fixed on one thing at a time. On the contrary, when you notice a big problem, all too often you find the little things that lead thereBoys are children not men .......... when a boy get older he become a man and that top is for a child not a man . Its fixed in my mind kids being killed no food nothing not this sad story of a childs top on the net from a very sad woman She needs to get a life. Next thing you will be saying Brownies and Girlguids in UK; for girl should be Boys too . "

You can't argue with the feminazi's love, it's pointless trying. They twist everything you say and always have to have the last word. Obviously they are always right and the rest of the world has got it wrong.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The world has gone fucking nuts

I second that motion. I think of all the other things in the world people could get upset about then this boys will be boys........... boys and girls no food no homes no mum and dads and no health care no nothing ....... wars killing people I could go on and on .

They're not mutually exclusive. Compassion and awareness are not solely fixed on one thing at a time. On the contrary, when you notice a big problem, all too often you find the little things that lead thereBoys are children not men .......... when a boy get older he become a man and that top is for a child not a man . Its fixed in my mind kids being killed no food nothing not this sad story of a childs top on the net from a very sad woman She needs to get a life. Next thing you will be saying Brownies and Girlguids in UK; for girl should be Boys too .

You can't argue with the feminazi's love, it's pointless trying. They twist everything you say and always have to have the last word. Obviously they are always right and the rest of the world has got it wrong. "
Look how I think will never be changed ..... I think this is one very sad person saying this .

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago

•+• Access Denied •+•


"https://youtu.be/iKcWu0tsiZM

Modern educayshun.

I don't necessarily agree with all of what's said in this clip. But food for thought for those who can be bothered to look."

you got a link for that video where they make disabled people able bodied by disabling able bodied people?

i remember seeing that being used in PC debates by the losing side. didn't make sense either.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The world has gone fucking nuts

I second that motion. I think of all the other things in the world people could get upset about then this boys will be boys........... boys and girls no food no homes no mum and dads and no health care no nothing ....... wars killing people I could go on and on .

They're not mutually exclusive. Compassion and awareness are not solely fixed on one thing at a time. On the contrary, when you notice a big problem, all too often you find the little things that lead thereBoys are children not men .......... when a boy get older he become a man and that top is for a child not a man . Its fixed in my mind kids being killed no food nothing not this sad story of a childs top on the net from a very sad woman She needs to get a life. Next thing you will be saying Brownies and Girlguids in UK; for girl should be Boys too .

You can't argue with the feminazi's love, it's pointless trying. They twist everything you say and always have to have the last word. Obviously they are always right and the rest of the world has got it wrong. "

'Feminazi'? At first I thought that was a typo. Then I saw the word 'nazi' in it and though what a coincidence. Then I realised you wrote that deliberately. Actually I think 'Feminazi' sounds likes it a great word for a female contraceptive device - you know like Femidom, or whatever it is those things are called. Or maybe a sanitary product? I'm being silly now

Mrs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"https://youtu.be/iKcWu0tsiZM

Modern educayshun.

I don't necessarily agree with all of what's said in this clip. But food for thought for those who can be bothered to look.

you got a link for that video where they make disabled people able bodied by disabling able bodied people?

i remember seeing that being used in PC debates by the losing side. didn't make sense either."

I looked at the link. It wasn't about disabled people. It was a scene from a maths classroom showing in an exaggerated form of how political correctness could go too far. Obviously friends what your view is as to what the take away from the video is.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago

•+• Access Denied •+•


"https://youtu.be/iKcWu0tsiZM

Modern educayshun.

I don't necessarily agree with all of what's said in this clip. But food for thought for those who can be bothered to look.

you got a link for that video where they make disabled people able bodied by disabling able bodied people?

i remember seeing that being used in PC debates by the losing side. didn't make sense either.

I looked at the link. It wasn't about disabled people. It was a scene from a maths classroom showing in an exaggerated form of how political correctness could go too far. Obviously friends what your view is as to what the take away from the video is. "
#

i watched the video, it didn't make sense. i could see what it was trying to say but nobody has changed the subject here, they've brought up feminist points but not changed the actual topic itself.

there's a similar one used to counter PC arguments (the one i mentioned above). some people see feminist issues as bringing men down to a lower level when these men don't acknowledge their privilege in the first place. hence the making able bodied people disabled (as in making them 'worse off') to make the disabled able bodied (as in they're now 'equals').

nobody is dragging people down when it comes to rights, usually, they're asking for the same privileges other spheres have.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago

•+• Access Denied •+•


"https://youtu.be/iKcWu0tsiZM

Modern educayshun.

I don't necessarily agree with all of what's said in this clip. But food for thought for those who can be bothered to look.

you got a link for that video where they make disabled people able bodied by disabling able bodied people?

i remember seeing that being used in PC debates by the losing side. didn't make sense either.

I looked at the link. It wasn't about disabled people. It was a scene from a maths classroom showing in an exaggerated form of how political correctness could go too far. Obviously friends what your view is as to what the take away from the video is. #

i watched the video, it didn't make sense. i could see what it was trying to say but nobody has changed the subject here, they've brought up feminist points but not changed the actual topic itself.

there's a similar one used to counter PC arguments (the one i mentioned above). some people see feminist issues as bringing men down to a lower level when these men don't acknowledge their privilege in the first place. hence the making able bodied people disabled (as in making them 'worse off') to make the disabled able bodied (as in they're now 'equals').

nobody is dragging people down when it comes to rights, usually, they're asking for the same privileges other spheres have."

sorry that had kinda changed the subject now actually, lol.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top