FabSwingers.com forum: Is it rude?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Afternoon, is it rude to not respond to messages if you're not interested in a person? For me I'd rather not enter into communications with someone if I'm not interested. What are people's thoughts? Xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do not respond to flyers and leaflets put through my door....... think the same applies here to unsolicited mail. If anyone messages me here that is not to my preference then there is no issue in simply not responding- especially when they have not read my profile or are crass etc

Sometimes responding with a polite decline just causes more hassle.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No it's not

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By *ryst In IsoldeWoman
over a year ago

your imagination

"I do not respond to flyers and leaflets put through my door....... think the same applies here to unsolicited mail. If anyone messages me here that is not to my preference then there is no issue in simply not responding- especially when they have not read my profile or are crass etc

Sometimes responding with a polite decline just causes more hassle."

Exactly this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope not at all, I do this all the time, apparently others do it too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As a guy who has had a few messages go unanswered and deleted, I would much prefer a thanks but no thanks. But I appreciate a lot of guys wouldn't take that very well so I understand why people do what they do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm terrible

I get so much mail that if i reply to everyone then they'll be no time for shenanigans

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not at all. Had a few unsolicited pm's yesterday that kept coming so I had to block in the end. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have tried answering with a thanks but no thanks but most times they come back with a why not and then you either ignore or once again explain.

Deleting although I don't like to do is it certainly the less stressful of the two.

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By *p4funCouple
over a year ago

Plymouth

Try to answer to all but just block if " no thankyou" fails

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As is stated clearly in the site FAQ's OP, it is not considered rude to not reply. A non reply should be taken as a 'no, thank you'

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

If you are currently looking for someone to contact you, they meet what you have asked for and have taken the time to craft a message that speaks to everything you are seeking: yes

If a one line cut and pasted nonsense: no

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thank you, I hate ignorance on a whole and I do feel ignorant but like some have said, you'll get the ones that want an explanation as to why x

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By *eybert77Man
over a year ago

Ramsey

To start with yes, but i think with all the messages women & couples get now i just think ok i'm not what they are looking for if i don't get a reply...lifes to short to worry

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If you are currently looking for someone to contact you, they meet what you have asked for and have taken the time to craft a message that speaks to everything you are seeking: yes

If a one line cut and pasted nonsense: no"

I understand that but what if they aren't my type, am I still expected to reply? X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I used to, don't really care anymore, it's not often I send an initial message anymore, I mostly to message people I've been in a conversation with before.

Id prefer a reply, but if I don't get one I just move on and think 'meh'

7 billion people on the planet, I'm not going to get strung up because a few haven't replied

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's not rude at all. I seem to be in the minority when I say that as a guy, I'd rather receive no response than a "thanks but no thanks". There's nothing more disappointing than opening a message from someone you've messaged, and it turns out to be them saying you're not their type.

The well adjusted folk here will get the message if you don't respond.

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By *workoutMan
over a year ago

Cradley Heath

I don't find a lack of reply rude, if I can see my message was read without reply I take it they're not interested. If it remains unread them I'll consider messaging again as I'm aware my message may have been lost amongst the many messages women receive.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's up to you op.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No not at all, all the guys get this and some take it personally?

If the message is crap, they clearly haven't read your profile, there's a face pic which you don't like, why should you respond?

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By *corpio67Man
over a year ago

hillingdon

I have reached the point like a lot of people on here now.

Have had to put a phrase at the end of my profile.

Now it has to be a definite no argument delete if it's not in their message!job done!

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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago

•+• Access Denied •+•

it's not really ignorant though. if someone isn't saying a definite yes to sex with someone they should always take that as a no, society needs to learn that.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"Afternoon, is it rude to not respond to messages if you're not interested in a person? For me I'd rather not enter into communications with someone if I'm not interested. What are people's thoughts? Xx"

No it's not it's in the FAQ section no response=not interested

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No response means they're not interested, if I don't get a reply or it's just deleted I'm happy with that, you girls can't reply to every message you get, you'd never get any sleep

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By *cott89Man
over a year ago

prestatyn

ive sent a few messages and not recieved replies, i dont see it as rude at all. by the sounds of it women get mountains of attention all the time so its understandable that replies aint definate

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

It's best to ignore as men pester wanting to know why!

Also I get a lot of messages saying 'meet me tonight' when I say no I get 'why' and them wanting my schedule for that night and days after so I then just block. Manners in this way are wasted on here due to the negative/nasty replies.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd obviously prefer a reply. I know it's hard when you ladies get a thousand a day! A simple no thanks x 999 should be feasible!

I'm sure 1 out of a thousand holds your interest

Seriously though a delete is fine, just not mine

I do like and appreciate a reply that has a little effort involved..........Or a good pic.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We as a couple have had every form of rejection and feel the best way to be told "you're not for me/us" is just deleting the message saves on the excitement of seing you have a message just to open it to a "no thanks"

And the babies who want a explanation need to sort there head out as it's pretty obvious

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If someone has put obvious time & effort in to their mail (not copied & pasted) I will usually reply but if I'm not interested will let them know.

One liners or "how are you" I don't bother.

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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

Sometimes responding with a polite decline just causes more hassle."

In answer to the question,

"Is it rude..?"

No, I don't think it is.

As for being unsolicited, well if the person messaging meets all your stated criteria and your filters are off so that those you're looking to meet can get in contact then, I don't think, under those circumstances, such messages are unsolicited.

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

Yep exactly that .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is it rude? No, and the FAQs say as much.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Rudeness is very subjective.

You must think it is rude or you wouldn't be soliciting opinions.

I don't think it's rude so don't spend time thinking about it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No not at all. If you respond even with a no thanks then some will see it as ooh she's responded and mail you again....

If you don't like them just leave it. Unless it's me, then respond with filth

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Does it matter if its rude or not. You can only be responsible for yourself so if you don't want to reply then don't, that's all there is to it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Does it matter if its rude or not. You can only be responsible for yourself so if you don't want to reply then don't, that's all there is to it.

Too true I don't reply to all but some I will even if it is a polite no thanks I think it depends on the initial message

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It says in the Fab rules that it's a simple polite decline.

Unfortunately some people don't seem to understand this though and either string off abuse and/or spam.

I hate to just block people as that to me feels rude

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you are currently looking for someone to contact you, they meet what you have asked for and have taken the time to craft a message that speaks to everything you are seeking: yes

If a one line cut and pasted nonsense: no"

You as the person may think you meet everything they are seeking but how do you know that? You've probably never spoken to them before so how can you be sure that you do?

I'm sure that every leaflet that gets put through my letter box thinks I'm looking for their services like every cold caller that also thinks that along with all the junk e mails, do you think people answer every single bit of correspondence they receive? Don't you think people are fed up of the abuse they get when saying thanks but no thanks? If I knew that if I said no thanks to all the messages that do not interest me that I wouldn't get any kind of come back I probably would answer most messages but seeing as I can go from being the sexiest most gorgeous etc woman on here to bring a fat ugly slag that's why I don't reply!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes it's rude not to. Thank you but no thank you is the decent thing to do.

After that you don't have to reply.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes it's rude not to. Thank you but no thank you is the decent thing to do.

After that you don't have to reply."

That opens up to a string of abuse, plus some people get so many messages that it would take so much time to respond to everyone that they just don't have.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP only reply to the messages YOU want to. Run your profile your way. If people see no response as being rude then maybe they should join a site that doesn't have no response is a polite no thank you in the FAQ. Their issue not yours. Replying to every message can get tedious, and then there's the abuse that you may get. Remember it's supposed to be fun!

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By *asokittyWoman
over a year ago

Nr Worksop

Nope! It's the same outcome juat saves getting any shitty messages back.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I send a message and see it has been looked at or even got rid of but no reply I just take it as that person isn't interested. I don't hold anything agenst them. With the amount of messages some people get on here it is unreasonable to think they can message back every time.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

Well I do feel rude in not replying to polite well written message's,but I can live with that guilt.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Doesn't bother me at all.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Respond as you see fit - Fab rules are clear, including the meaning of not responding. It goes against some peoples' morals or something but it is definitely Fab acceptable to not respond to anyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People are different and its not rude but....i reckon it is 1 of them things adds to guys frustration.

It is rude but its not so if its not rude kind of blurrs the lines.

Hard to explain but not suprized some men get on like dicks its just the enviroment plus the knockbacks irrational shit goes on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes responding with a polite decline just causes more hassle.

In answer to the question,

"Is it rude..?"

No, I don't think it is.

The only people that can mail me are men in the age preference set, but just because he is male and 33 (for example) does not mean that I want to particularly hear from him so it is unsolicited.

Any meet that I post is also very specific so again, anyone that is not for me/I am not for them will see the message simply being deleted.

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By *icolerobbieCouple
over a year ago

walsall

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

It's not rude not to reply. If more people understood that then there would be a damn sight less anger and bewilderment on here and people's experience of using this site would be much more fun.

No reply = not interested

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"It's best to ignore as men pester wanting to know why!

So true x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We say, "no thanks" and block. We don't think it is rude if the person writing to us does not meet our preferences or we do not find attractive

- Mrs. J -

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