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Zombie apocalypse

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By *aughty_nymph OP   Woman
over a year ago

Cheltenham

If the tv or radio did a news flash saying there was a zombie apocalypse starting right now....

1. What 5 things would you keep?

2. What would you do?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Run in circles screaming probably, as for the 5 things, I'll need to think about this........ I'll probably get eaten while I'm still debating what clothes I need

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I'd leap into my BOV and shout "haha suckers!" as I drive off to my nuclear survival bunker.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fuck it I'm hungry

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By *aughty_nymph OP   Woman
over a year ago

Cheltenham

I would barocade myself in my work (I work in a basement kitchen) so I wouldn't starve, I would have access to weapons and I'm underground.

I would have access to hotel rooms too and alcohol lol!

As for the 5 items,

My phone for games, charger, clothes, make up and a vibrator lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Guns, swords, a amphibious tank, fuel for said tank and food.

Then go pick up my family and find an island...

Easy

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By *ittleAcornMan
over a year ago

visiting the beach

At last!

This is when my two-stroke mopeds come into their own!

I'd go join anyone stocking up The Redoubt (Napoleonic fort) just over the road from me...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Go back to sleep, no dead cunt can get in here.

Later, me my Kevlar vest with ceramic plates and tasteful punisher skull back spray job and super man S on the front, Kevlar gloves and grab bag of toys.

Will forage for essential things.

Like a generator to keep my box set habit happy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Head down the Winchester for a pint?

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"Head down the Winchester for a pint?"

The idea is to get away from the zombies

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"I would barocade myself in my work (I work in a basement kitchen) so I wouldn't starve, I would have access to weapons and I'm underground.

I would have access to hotel rooms too and alcohol lol!

As for the 5 items,

My phone for games, charger, clothes, make up and a vibrator lol. "

In the event of a zombie apocalypse doubt the electricity plants would be in operation to produce the electricity charge your phone or power most of the appliances in your fancy kitchen/hotel

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Head down the Winchester for a pint?

The idea is to get away from the zombies "

Only if your one of these 'survive' the zombie apocalypse pussies.

Live it. I read the survivalist novels

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By *iggles and BeardyCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

Put on my armour, pick up a sword and wait.. films already showed zombies can't bite you if you wear chain mail.

Being a geek has its bonuses

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If they are the slow zombies like walking dead

1. find shelter and reinforce

2. gather loved ones

3. gather food

4. gather weapons

5. gather supplies (first aid, anti biotics etc)

if they are the fast ones similar to the infected on 28 days later i think id just kill myself as cardio is not my thing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If they are the slow zombies like walking dead

1. find shelter and reinforce

2. gather loved ones

3. gather food

4. gather weapons

5. gather supplies (first aid, anti biotics etc)

if they are the fast ones similar to the infected on 28 days later i think id just kill myself as cardio is not my thing"

Hahahahaha.

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By *s_macWoman
over a year ago

Traffic land

I'd take my kids and head to my ex, he's one of those preppers. I'm sure even he wouldnt leave the mother of his kids to the zombies

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"Head down the Winchester for a pint?

The idea is to get away from the zombies

Only if your one of these 'survive' the zombie apocalypse pussies.

Live it. I read the survivalist novels "

It was a joke

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Head down the Winchester for a pint?"

Its got heavy doors and somewhere we can smoke. Plan!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Turn up the tunes (Loud)

Let's go!!

B&Q - Tool up

Help any damsels in distress

Secure Asda - "if it has a built in McDonalds then it's a bonus"

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By *s_macWoman
over a year ago

Traffic land


"Head down the Winchester for a pint?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

5 things I would keep:

1) my crossbow

2) my butcher's knife

3) my boxer dog (not cause she is vicious. She just barks when people she doesn't know come near. So good warning system)

4) my chain maill

5) my leather armour.

What I would do: my first plan is to lay low at home until the rush has stopped. Going to get supplies early is smart as you can get more stuff, but you could easily get swamped. Once it all dies down, I would rush down, getting what i need. I luckily know all the short cuts where there arent many people. Once I get back home, I would lay out traps so nothing can get near the house. For the first few weeks while power is till going, there will be phone service, so I would try and get in contact with friends and try and organise a plan with them

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"Head down the Winchester for a pint?

The idea is to get away from the zombies

Only if your one of these 'survive' the zombie apocalypse pussies.

Live it. I read the survivalist novels

It was a joke "

Oh fuck!! I misread it as the town not the pub!!! What a twat.

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By *andemanMan
over a year ago

bedforshire

Put my Good Bike Armour On, kevlar just as good as chain mail.

Build myself some Molitovs.

Head to the tallest building. Scavange for food and kit block the stairwells, zombies dont use lifts.

Then sit up on the roof and burn the beggers. Most efficent way to deal with them as they walk into each other burning transfering the fire to more and more. Also Fire kills all known and unkown Virus and Germs.

Kit

1) my portable Geni

2)mobile sat phone

3) Sugar Desiel vodka mix (homemade Naypalm)

4)my sex toys (hay you cant burn Zombies all day)

5) about 4 sexy subs to amuse myself with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

shag a few of them and no bj's(unless teeth removed)

at least it's not as sick as shagging dead people

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By *andemanMan
over a year ago

bedforshire

Shagging the Undead?

No not feeling that I will stick to burning them and shagging my dependent Subs.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Probably just take an overdose and have done with it rather than wait for the inevitable and a shitty world

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By *aughty_nymph OP   Woman
over a year ago

Cheltenham


"I would barocade myself in my work (I work in a basement kitchen) so I wouldn't starve, I would have access to weapons and I'm underground.

I would have access to hotel rooms too and alcohol lol!

As for the 5 items,

My phone for games, charger, clothes, make up and a vibrator lol.

In the event of a zombie apocalypse doubt the electricity plants would be in operation to produce the electricity charge your phone or power most of the appliances in your fancy kitchen/hotel "

We have a solar powered generator to run the hotel in the case of power failure

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Shagging the Undead?

No not feeling that I will stick to burning them and shagging my dependent Subs."

lol

anyway......the undead cant remain for too long, rotting flesh attracts flies..the undead would be eaten by maggots fairly quickly.

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By *aughty_nymph OP   Woman
over a year ago

Cheltenham

There's some brilliant ideas here tbh

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By *onny MCMan
over a year ago

Crawley


"At last!

This is when my two-stroke mopeds come into their own!

I'd go join anyone stocking up The Redoubt (Napoleonic fort) just over the road from me... "

I've always thought filming a zombie apocalypse movie using an old castle would be awesome!

Britain will survive the zombie apocalypse cos we have castles. Those Yanks with their complete lack of real history are fucked.

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By *onny MCMan
over a year ago

Crawley


"At last!

This is when my two-stroke mopeds come into their own!

I'd go join anyone stocking up The Redoubt (Napoleonic fort) just over the road from me... "

I've always thought filming a zombie apocalypse movie using an old castle would be awesome!

Britain will survive the zombie apocalypse cos we have castles. Those Yanks with their complete lack of real history are fucked.

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By *onny MCMan
over a year ago

Crawley


"At last!

This is when my two-stroke mopeds come into their own!

I'd go join anyone stocking up The Redoubt (Napoleonic fort) just over the road from me... "

I've always thought filming a zombie apocalypse movie using an old castle would be awesome!

Britain will survive the zombie apocalypse cos we have castles. Those Yanks with their complete lack of real history are fucked.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1. My sai (raf from the ninja turtle's weapons)

2. Steel toe cap boots

3. My van

4. My acoustic bass guitar

5. My cat

I'd travel round helping people set up camps and try to build a new world...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Head down the Winchester for a pint?"

And wait for it all to blow over?

Also a good idea!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Find my cricket bat?

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By *rrol.BMan
over a year ago

Wrexham


"shag a few of them and no bj's(unless teeth removed)

at least it's not as sick as shagging dead people "

Too right on the BJ.

If Porn of the Dead has taught me anything it is definitely don't get a blowjob from a zombie.

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By *andemanMan
over a year ago

bedforshire


"Probably just take an overdose and have done with it rather than wait for the inevitable and a shitty world "

Now young lady that is wholly unnessesary. Come along to my Tower and let me make you dinner on my camping stove while we watch all those UKIP voters Burn.

Just think when the smoke clears how delightful the world will be without them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Probably just take an overdose and have done with it rather than wait for the inevitable and a shitty world

Now young lady that is wholly unnessesary. Come along to my Tower and let me make you dinner on my camping stove while we watch all those UKIP voters Burn.

Just think when the smoke clears how delightful the world will be without them."

I'll take my option

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Head to our local spa (name unmentioned) they already have their full quota of the walking dead key janglers.

Should be safe from extras for a while

(No real offence intended really to the key jangling single men at the spa )

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

An axe.

Deodorant

A Tampon. (Don't ask)

My car

And my guitar.

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"I would barocade myself in my work (I work in a basement kitchen) so I wouldn't starve, I would have access to weapons and I'm underground.

I would have access to hotel rooms too and alcohol lol!

As for the 5 items,

My phone for games, charger, clothes, make up and a vibrator lol.

In the event of a zombie apocalypse doubt the electricity plants would be in operation to produce the electricity charge your phone or power most of the appliances in your fancy kitchen/hotel

We have a solar powered generator to run the hotel in the case of power failure "

In that case I'm joining you in the hotel bunker and my 5 things would be

A fit verile guy that knows how to fix the generator (needs to be fit so we can help repopulate the earth afterwards)

My kids

As much food as possible

Clothes

A weapon of some kind

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

in the event of a global disaster even a zombie one..its good to see what happens when there arent any people left here:-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wy7Q6wazD_E

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ive had a plan for years on how to fortify my house and get supplies. But my little brother is at school and my niece is at nursery, so I'd have to rescue them otherwise not much point trying to survive

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By *andemanMan
over a year ago

bedforshire


"Probably just take an overdose and have done with it rather than wait for the inevitable and a shitty world

Now young lady that is wholly unnessesary. Come along to my Tower and let me make you dinner on my camping stove while we watch all those UKIP voters Burn.

Just think when the smoke clears how delightful the world will be without them.

I'll take my option"

I am a very Good Cook and I have i been told good taste in wine.

Shagging as always is ladies choice. I never go anywhere univited young lady.

I assure you life afterwards will not be shitty.

The enviroment will recover niecly people will need to get along with each other to survive. High finnance will be a thing of the past. No PR no Daily Fail no tampon Tax.

You can Learn to use a sword and dress as you like go where you like. No ques at art Galleries solor powered Cinimas.

Bull shit Dark Goverment types will be outnumbered by the hardened Survivors so they will have to play nice or get sliced and diced.

Sounds rather pleasent actually.

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By *andemanMan
over a year ago

bedforshire


"Ive had a plan for years on how to fortify my house and get supplies. But my little brother is at school and my niece is at nursery, so I'd have to rescue them otherwise not much point trying to survive"

Well of course. Iam lucky most of my family are well organised so tell them to stay put till its over and meet up afterwards.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"An axe.

Deodorant

A Tampon. (Don't ask)

My car

And my guitar.

"

I really want to ask...

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By *buddie69Man
over a year ago

Stoke-on-Trent

I've watched more than enough zombie tv/films to know that I could handle the zombie apocalypse. Zombies are relatively slow moving and easily neutralised in pretty much every show with one exception. If the Zombies were the same as the film World War Z we're all fucked!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd get plenty of supplies and get my daughter and I into a submarine till they're all gone!

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By *andemanMan
over a year ago

bedforshire


"I'd get plenty of supplies and get my daughter and I into a submarine till they're all gone!"

Good plan. What about the Crew?

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By *andemanMan
over a year ago

bedforshire


"I've watched more than enough zombie tv/films to know that I could handle the zombie apocalypse. Zombies are relatively slow moving and easily neutralised in pretty much every show with one exception. If the Zombies were the same as the film World War Z we're all fucked!"

No just much more Napalm!

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By *eesideMan
over a year ago

margate sumwear by the sea

1 kill fill

2 get mum

3 rescue lizz

4 go to the wind Chester and wate for all of this to blow over, over a nice cold pint

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By *eesideMan
over a year ago

margate sumwear by the sea

I wood just stay wear I am as I'm in a block of flats with lots of lockarball does butreen me and out side.

And I wood just carry my bench bar with me wen I go to the shop to get / find food and sirpliyers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"An axe.

Deodorant

A Tampon. (Don't ask)

My car

And my guitar.

I really want to ask..."

The first time I was told this. It makes sense. Pack something if it has multiple uses. 1 item can be ten.

It's a water filter, its sterile so can be used for a wound dressing. It's also highly flammable for starting a fire,,, many more uses. Pack it in a survival kit. You can't go wrong.

*Need alert.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"1 kill fill

2 get mum

3 rescue lizz

4 go to the wind Chester and wate for all of this to blow over, over a nice cold pint "

Perfect. Wait till it blows over.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"An axe.

Deodorant

A Tampon. (Don't ask)

My car

And my guitar.

I really want to ask...

The first time I was told this. It makes sense. Pack something if it has multiple uses. 1 item can be ten.

It's a water filter, its sterile so can be used for a wound dressing. It's also highly flammable for starting a fire,,, many more uses. Pack it in a survival kit. You can't go wrong.

*Need alert. "

Have you ever tried to light a tampon? They seem a bit hard to light. Or did when a lass from AGC tried on an EAnE

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By *ittleAcornMan
over a year ago

visiting the beach


"I've watched more than enough zombie tv/films to know that I could handle the zombie apocalypse. Zombies are relatively slow moving and easily neutralised in pretty much every show with one exception. If the Zombies were the same as the film World War Z we're all fucked!"

They were a bit tricky in I Am Legend also...

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By *aughty_nymph OP   Woman
over a year ago

Cheltenham


"I would barocade myself in my work (I work in a basement kitchen) so I wouldn't starve, I would have access to weapons and I'm underground.

I would have access to hotel rooms too and alcohol lol!

As for the 5 items,

My phone for games, charger, clothes, make up and a vibrator lol.

In the event of a zombie apocalypse doubt the electricity plants would be in operation to produce the electricity charge your phone or power most of the appliances in your fancy kitchen/hotel

We have a solar powered generator to run the hotel in the case of power failure

In that case I'm joining you in the hotel bunker and my 5 things would be

A fit verile guy that knows how to fix the generator (needs to be fit so we can help repopulate the earth afterwards)

My kids

As much food as possible

Clothes

A weapon of some kind "

We have meat cleavers, hack saws and machetes here no weapon required

And food wise.... we have enough here to last about 200 meals at the moment lol

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"I would barocade myself in my work (I work in a basement kitchen) so I wouldn't starve, I would have access to weapons and I'm underground.

I would have access to hotel rooms too and alcohol lol!

As for the 5 items,

My phone for games, charger, clothes, make up and a vibrator lol.

In the event of a zombie apocalypse doubt the electricity plants would be in operation to produce the electricity charge your phone or power most of the appliances in your fancy kitchen/hotel

We have a solar powered generator to run the hotel in the case of power failure

In that case I'm joining you in the hotel bunker and my 5 things would be

A fit verile guy that knows how to fix the generator (needs to be fit so we can help repopulate the earth afterwards)

My kids

As much food as possible

Clothes

A weapon of some kind

We have meat cleavers, hack saws and machetes here no weapon required

And food wise.... we have enough here to last about 200 meals at the moment lol"

Yes should have been obvious there would be weapons of that variety

So I'll go for still bringing extra food supplies as they won't come in wrong

And medical supplies not found in standard first aid kits

I'm a very practical person if you've noticed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"An axe.

Deodorant

A Tampon. (Don't ask)

My car

And my guitar.

I really want to ask...

The first time I was told this. It makes sense. Pack something if it has multiple uses. 1 item can be ten.

It's a water filter, its sterile so can be used for a wound dressing. It's also highly flammable for starting a fire,,, many more uses. Pack it in a survival kit. You can't go wrong.

*Need alert.

Have you ever tried to light a tampon? They seem a bit hard to light. Or did when a lass from AGC tried on an EAnE "

With a flint and steel (I'm at risk of showing what a nerd I am). It catches quickly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would board up all my windows, reinforce my front door and buy a suit of armor as would love to see the zombies try and bit through steel.

Would keep all my items as I wouldn't move

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Gather as many freinds and family I can while avoiding risks, anyone bitten is killed without fail, then head to nearest prison and survive XD

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"An axe.

Deodorant

A Tampon. (Don't ask)

My car

And my guitar.

I really want to ask...

The first time I was told this. It makes sense. Pack something if it has multiple uses. 1 item can be ten.

It's a water filter, its sterile so can be used for a wound dressing. It's also highly flammable for starting a fire,,, many more uses. Pack it in a survival kit. You can't go wrong.

*Need alert. "

They can be quite filling too if you run out of food...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"An axe.

Deodorant

A Tampon. (Don't ask)

My car

And my guitar.

I really want to ask...

The first time I was told this. It makes sense. Pack something if it has multiple uses. 1 item can be ten.

It's a water filter, its sterile so can be used for a wound dressing. It's also highly flammable for starting a fire,,, many more uses. Pack it in a survival kit. You can't go wrong.

*Need alert.

They can be quite filling too if you run out of food... "

Stuff it up your nose to avoid the smell of the rotting flesh that's accumulated

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dunno. I have two small kids who can't run for toffee (asthma/small legs) and they're heavy so i wouldn't be able to stuff them under each arm

and rub.

Plus my mum can barely walk nevermind do light jogging.

Think we'd all be doomed unless we found a suped up mobility scooter in the vicinity.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"An axe.

Deodorant

A Tampon. (Don't ask)

My car

And my guitar.

I really want to ask...

The first time I was told this. It makes sense. Pack something if it has multiple uses. 1 item can be ten.

It's a water filter, its sterile so can be used for a wound dressing. It's also highly flammable for starting a fire,,, many more uses. Pack it in a survival kit. You can't go wrong.

*Need alert.

Have you ever tried to light a tampon? They seem a bit hard to light. Or did when a lass from AGC tried on an EAnE

With a flint and steel (I'm at risk of showing what a nerd I am). It catches quickly. "

Have u actually tried it?

Your better off with the proper fire lighter stuff by far.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I dunno. I have two small kids who can't run for toffee (asthma/small legs) and they're heavy so i wouldn't be able to stuff them under each arm

and rub.

Plus my mum can barely walk nevermind do light jogging.

Think we'd all be doomed unless we found a suped up mobility scooter in the vicinity."

And run not rub

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Goto the winchester pub and wait for it all to blow over...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Apparently Physics students at Leicester University calculated that in as little as 100 days, humans would be outnumbered a million-to-one if an infectious "zombie virus" were to strike....

Further education eh! tuh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

big fuck-off knives n stabbing shit

plus fire up the bike for easy travelling....

#bringitondude

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"An axe.

Deodorant

A Tampon. (Don't ask)

My car

And my guitar.

I really want to ask...

The first time I was told this. It makes sense. Pack something if it has multiple uses. 1 item can be ten.

It's a water filter, its sterile so can be used for a wound dressing. It's also highly flammable for starting a fire,,, many more uses. Pack it in a survival kit. You can't go wrong.

*Need alert.

Have you ever tried to light a tampon? They seem a bit hard to light. Or did when a lass from AGC tried on an EAnE

With a flint and steel (I'm at risk of showing what a nerd I am). It catches quickly.

Have u actually tried it?

Your better off with the proper fire lighter stuff by far. "

Like a lighter? . I know, It makes sense.

Yes, I've tried it. Get your tinder staked properly, and it works. It's cotton.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If Im honest id be like one of those old ladies who just get into bed and wait for the inevitable.

Story of my life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If Im honest id be like one of those old ladies who just get into bed and wait for the inevitable.

Story of my life "

If I'm honest, I'd like you to wait in bed for the inevitable.

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By *andemanMan
over a year ago

bedforshire

Yes we would be outnumbered vastly. But thats where Fire Comes in. it requires no great effort it travels of its own accord is highly Efficient kills all known and unknown Virus and Germs. Zombies are dead and not known for applying intelegence to thier efforts. So they walk around bumping into each other pass the fire on. No need for risky sword play or even getting near them. With no food and rotting flesh it will take about a year for the Majority of them to die out.

The rest of us having proved we can survive for a year are clearly good at it and so will survive long term.

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By *andemanMan
over a year ago

bedforshire

[Removed by poster at 12/05/17 18:42:14]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Things to keep:

Bladed weapons from my wall

My two dogs

The other half

My fpv drone

My car

What to do:

Head for the least populated area with above goods and find somewhere out of the way to hold up preferably a farm with water storage and fuel supply and use the drone with fpv goggles to scout for supplies and other survivors. Using basic supplies you should be able to survive and hopefully wait it out in a well defended farm that can also h3lp provide more food.

Yes I have given this a little thought lol

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By *thwalescplCouple
over a year ago

brecon


"5 things I would keep:

1) my crossbow

2) my butcher's knife

3) my boxer dog (not cause she is vicious. She just barks when people she doesn't know come near. So good warning system)

4) my chain maill

5) my leather armour.

What I would do: my first plan is to lay low at home until the rush has stopped. Going to get supplies early is smart as you can get more stuff, but you could easily get swamped. Once it all dies down, I would rush down, getting what i need. I luckily know all the short cuts where there arent many people. Once I get back home, I would lay out traps so nothing can get near the house. For the first few weeks while power is till going, there will be phone service, so I would try and get in contact with friends and try and organise a plan with them"

Power will go down quite quickly, phone service will last a little longer but not much (backup generators).

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By *andemanMan
over a year ago

bedforshire

Well at this Rate when the Emergancy is over and the Zimbies are all dead.

We Swingers are going to be the Norm!

Party!

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