FabSwingers.com forum: It's a disaster....

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

always have a sample of spunk in the freezer just in case

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Stop milking it...tut!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"always have a sample of spunk in the freezer just in case "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have it black ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"always have a sample of spunk in the freezer just in case "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have it black ?

Ah but once you go black...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

Quite a bit nearer and I'd bring you some. As I'm not, put extra sugar in and have it black. Then when you've woken a bit more go get some milk lazy bones

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Walk to the shop. It'll wake you up and return for the reward of a great cup of coffee.

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Can't you just lactate a little bit

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By *ost SockMan
over a year ago

West Wales and Cardiff

"I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

Send naughty messages to lonely Welshmen to distract yourself from the pain.

Obviously.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have it black ?

that's my preference

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Walk to the shop. It'll wake you up and return for the reward of a great cup of coffee.

It's 5 miles away, I ain't walking that in the weather. I may be cray but not that crazy

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

Quite a bit nearer and I'd bring you some. As I'm not, put extra sugar in and have it black. Then when you've woken a bit more go get some milk lazy bones

Nearest shop is 5 miles away, my car is where I left it last night and I ain't walking. Just bring me some please. I'd thank you

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

I'm enjoying my hot milky coffee.. Mmmmmm slurp slurp.. this fresh full fat blue top tastes lurverly .. mmmmmm mmmmmm mmmmmm

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm enjoying my hot milky coffee.. Mmmmmm slurp slurp.. this fresh full fat blue top tastes lurverly .. mmmmmm mmmmmm mmmmmm

You naughty man teasing me like that. You need your bum spanking.

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Come and get me ... The coffee pot is still hot and fresh .. just like the milk xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

Quite a bit nearer and I'd bring you some. As I'm not, put extra sugar in and have it black. Then when you've woken a bit more go get some milk lazy bones

Nearest shop is 5 miles away, my car is where I left it last night and I ain't walking. Just bring me some please. I'd thank you

Sex for milk? That'd be a new one

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By *ouplefunukCouple
over a year ago

North Bristol

Deliveroo?

Always keep an emergency pint in the freezer!

I know that doesn't help now, but still...

*Him*

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By *ost SockMan
over a year ago

West Wales and Cardiff

"I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

Quite a bit nearer and I'd bring you some. As I'm not, put extra sugar in and have it black. Then when you've woken a bit more go get some milk lazy bones

Nearest shop is 5 miles away, my car is where I left it last night and I ain't walking. Just bring me some please. I'd thank you

Sex for milk? That'd be a new one

Not really, but you're way too young to remember Benny Hill's character. Actually, I'm a bit too young even!

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Do you want it pasteurized cos pasteurized is best

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Walk to the shop. It'll wake you up and return for the reward of a great cup of coffee.

It's 5 miles away, I ain't walking that in the weather. I may be cray but not that crazy

Only one solution. Have me in your bed the night before. I'd have got up and walked for you.

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By *lovebustyladiesMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

Go to the shop maybe?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Walk to the shop. It'll wake you up and return for the reward of a great cup of coffee.

It's 5 miles away, I ain't walking that in the weather. I may be cray but not that crazy

Only one solution. Have me in your bed the night before. I'd have got up and walked for you.

Oh man, now you tell me

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Go to the shop maybe?

It would be a 5 mile walk there then 5 miles back. I ain't doing that in this weather.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

Just sent some by air mail lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

Just sent some by air mail lol

Ah thank you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

Just sent some by air mail lol

Ah thank you

Your more than welcome

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Some people say there'll be a milkman in the morning

The milkman in the morning didn't come

Some people wanted their coffee in the morning

Some people said they'd spank my bum

I'm gonna leave old Durham town

With two litres of full fat gold top

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ask a neighbour?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

Quite a bit nearer and I'd bring you some. As I'm not, put extra sugar in and have it black. Then when you've woken a bit more go get some milk lazy bones

Nearest shop is 5 miles away, my car is where I left it last night and I ain't walking. Just bring me some please. I'd thank you

I'd love to but it's a bit too far, sorry. If its any consolation my white coffee is delicious, may even have a 2nd one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've got too much milk. I might have to throw some away if the kids don't drink some later. ..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

Get on the internet and get some milk delivered. Simples

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Ask a neighbour?"

They live 2 miles away

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ask a neighbour?

They live 2 miles away"

Closer than the shop!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Buy a cow.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Buy a cow."

You're welcome.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Buy a goat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

I feel your pain, I too am hungover..... but I am without bacon. Help

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

"Buy a goat

Lady who lady who lady who who

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

Have it black you'll never go back

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Buy a goat

goats are cute. I'd like a goat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

simple - just be more organised

xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

"
sperm is a similar colour

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"simple - just be more organised

xxx"

or learn to like it black the way it should be.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"simple - just be more organised

xxx"

I know, my bad. My family used it all last night while I was out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No milk here either; I'm finishing off the other half of my large bottle of Bud instead... not an alky honest

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

"simple - just be more organised

xxx

I know, my bad. My family used it all last night while I was out."

Make them walk to the shop!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"simple - just be more organised

xxx

I know, my bad. My family used it all last night while I was out."

in that case not your fault - make them get some for you

i always use the uht milk and have half a cupboard full

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Buy a goat

goats are cute. I'd like a goat

I do hope you haven't been listening to Kevin Bloody Wilson...brings a whole new meaning to what you just said LMAO

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"simple - just be more organised

xxx

I know, my bad. My family used it all last night while I was out.

in that case not your fault - make them get some for you

i always use the uht milk and have half a cupboard full "

I've got back up coffee whitener for hubby for just these situations. I used to be a girl guide

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

"simple - just be more organised

xxx

I know, my bad. My family used it all last night while I was out.

in that case not your fault - make them get some for you

i always use the uht milk and have half a cupboard full "

You can't find the scissors to open the crumpets though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

That's fucking horrific! You have my every sympathy x

Ruby

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By *r Costa xxMan
over a year ago

stirling

Post a meet for this morning, you never know yer luck

Sexy milf looking for a sexy man, milk and gsoh essential

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"simple - just be more organised

xxx

I know, my bad. My family used it all last night while I was out.

in that case not your fault - make them get some for you

i always use the uht milk and have half a cupboard full

You can't find the scissors to open the crumpets though

i do use scissors but bugs the hell out of me that i need to do that

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Post a meet for this morning, you never know yer luck

Sexy milf looking for a sexy man, milk and gsoh essential

Haha would you reply to it?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"simple - just be more organised

xxx

I know, my bad. My family used it all last night while I was out.

in that case not your fault - make them get some for you

i always use the uht milk and have half a cupboard full

You can't find the scissors to open the crumpets though

i do use scissors but bugs the hell out of me that i need to do that "

Damn, who mentioned crumpets, I could do with those too.

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By *r Costa xxMan
over a year ago

stirling

"Post a meet for this morning, you never know yer luck

Sexy milf looking for a sexy man, milk and gsoh essential

Haha would you reply to it?

You bet I would

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

"simple - just be more organised

xxx

I know, my bad. My family used it all last night while I was out.

in that case not your fault - make them get some for you

i always use the uht milk and have half a cupboard full

You can't find the scissors to open the crumpets though

i do use scissors but bugs the hell out of me that i need to do that

Damn, who mentioned crumpets, I could do with those too."

I'd move closer to old Durham town

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Go to the shop maybe?

It would be a 5 mile walk there then 5 miles back. I ain't doing that in this weather."

I know a couple of fellas who'd happily walk 509 miles, I'll give them a call

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"simple - just be more organised

xxx

I know, my bad. My family used it all last night while I was out.

in that case not your fault - make them get some for you

i always use the uht milk and have half a cupboard full

You can't find the scissors to open the crumpets though

i do use scissors but bugs the hell out of me that i need to do that

Damn, who mentioned crumpets, I could do with those too."

me - you want to come to me - i got both - crumpets and milky coffee

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

"Go to the shop maybe?

It would be a 5 mile walk there then 5 miles back. I ain't doing that in this weather.

I know a couple of fellas who'd happily walk 509 miles, I'll give them a call

When they go can they bring back .....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"simple - just be more organised

xxx

I know, my bad. My family used it all last night while I was out.

in that case not your fault - make them get some for you

i always use the uht milk and have half a cupboard full

You can't find the scissors to open the crumpets though

i do use scissors but bugs the hell out of me that i need to do that

Damn, who mentioned crumpets, I could do with those too.

me - you want to come to me - i got both - crumpets and milky coffee"

I'm on the next train

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"simple - just be more organised

xxx

I know, my bad. My family used it all last night while I was out.

in that case not your fault - make them get some for you

i always use the uht milk and have half a cupboard full

You can't find the scissors to open the crumpets though

i do use scissors but bugs the hell out of me that i need to do that

Damn, who mentioned crumpets, I could do with those too.

I'd move closer to old Durham town

You should. It's a fantastic city. And the women are mighty fine too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"simple - just be more organised

xxx

I know, my bad. My family used it all last night while I was out.

in that case not your fault - make them get some for you

i always use the uht milk and have half a cupboard full

You can't find the scissors to open the crumpets though

i do use scissors but bugs the hell out of me that i need to do that

Damn, who mentioned crumpets, I could do with those too.

me - you want to come to me - i got both - crumpets and milky coffee

I'm on the next train

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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago

secret town

"I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

Put ice cream in it or squirty cream

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Pull some udders in nearby fields, closer than shops and neighbours.

Post a Social meet - for coffee, if they bring milk

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Pull some udders in nearby fields, closer than shops and neighbours.

Post a Social meet - for coffee, if they bring milk"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pull some udders in nearby fields, closer than shops and neighbours.

Post a Social meet - for coffee, if they bring milk

oh yeah -- look on 'who is nearby' on your phone

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

"Pull some udders in nearby fields, closer than shops and neighbours.

Post a Social meet - for coffee, if they bring milk

oh yeah -- look on 'who is nearby' on your phone

You could meet up at Costa's

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By *owdyboy 890Man
over a year ago

Country West

Any cows in the nearest field to milk

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By *ubSirVient-DefinitionCouple
over a year ago

dukinfield

"Buy a goat

goats are cute. I'd like a goat

Me too, it's nice in a curry!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Pull some udders in nearby fields, closer than shops and neighbours.

Post a Social meet - for coffee, if they bring milk

oh yeah -- look on 'who is nearby' on your phone

You could meet up at Costa's

I'd have to walk 5 miles

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Any cows in the nearest field to milk

Nope, they are beef cows not milkers

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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

flash the milkman when you see him delivering to next door

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

"Pull some udders in nearby fields, closer than shops and neighbours.

Post a Social meet - for coffee, if they bring milk

oh yeah -- look on 'who is nearby' on your phone

You could meet up at Costa's

I'd have to walk 5 miles

You must be a well fit bird .. all this walking

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Pull some udders in nearby fields, closer than shops and neighbours.

Post a Social meet - for coffee, if they bring milk

oh yeah -- look on 'who is nearby' on your phone

You could meet up at Costa's

I'd have to walk 5 miles

You must be a well fit bird .. all this walking

I don't, I drive everywhere

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

flash the milkman when you see him delivering to next door

Next door is 2 miles away. He'd need to have damn good eyesight to see me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll bring you some milk.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Surprised your inbox isn't exploding with offers of 'cream' to put in it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ring your bestie - invite them round for a cuppa.

Tell them to go to Costa en route!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bloody hell. In all seriousness how do you cope being so isolated? At least I have hubby's car as back up. And neighbours.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Bloody hell. In all seriousness how do you cope being so isolated? At least I have hubby's car as back up. And neighbours. "

It's not an issue usually. I have my own car but I left it in the town last night as I couldn't drive home after drinking. I love where I live. It isn't isolated at all, just seems it when I've ran out of milk

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Ring your bestie - invite them round for a cuppa.

Tell them to go to Costa en route!"

Best suggestion yet

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'll bring you some milk.

I'm waiting..............

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By *ust PeachyWoman
over a year ago

Prestonish

"Have it black ?

Ah but once you go black..."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have you not sorted this out yet?

Where is it you live, I could have made my way to you and brewed it myself by now.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Have you not sorted this out yet?

Where is it you live, I could have made my way to you and brewed it myself by now.

I'm waiting for a lift to go and collect my car, then I'm going grocery shopping

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By *hloe sussexTV/TS
over a year ago

Larne

"always have a sample of spunk in the freezer just in case "

Like gross ,!

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By *r Costa xxMan
over a year ago

stirling

"Ring your bestie - invite them round for a cuppa.

Tell them to go to Costa en route!

Best suggestion yet

Did someone call?????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Stop milking it...tut!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This week I had no milk but had cream, So I put a little water in cream .. it made a sort of a milk .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have you not sorted this out yet?

Where is it you live, I could have made my way to you and brewed it myself by now.

I'm waiting for a lift to go and collect my car, then I'm going grocery shopping

Via costa drive through.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Have you not sorted this out yet?

Where is it you live, I could have made my way to you and brewed it myself by now.

I'm waiting for a lift to go and collect my car, then I'm going grocery shopping

Via costa drive through.

Nearest one of those is 20 miles away

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have you not sorted this out yet?

Where is it you live, I could have made my way to you and brewed it myself by now.

I'm waiting for a lift to go and collect my car, then I'm going grocery shopping

Via costa drive through.

Nearest one of those is 20 miles away

Heading in the direction of Manchester? I do t see problems, i see opportunities.

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Time for a lovely hot steaming cup of tea .. milk of course

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By *r Costa xxMan
over a year ago

stirling

Lovely hot choclate, made with milk, lots off milk

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

Once you go black you'll never go back....apparently.

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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago

secret town

Did you get some milk?

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By *londie8399Couple
over a year ago

blackpool

"I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

Once you go black you'll never go back....apparently.

Nothing worse than being hung over and no coffee

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That was me last week but panic overted when I remembered the squirty cream in the bottom of the fridge! Lol x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That was me last week but panic overted when I remembered the squirty cream in the bottom of the fridge! Lol x "

I'm so glad I re-read that.

It was a whole different post otherwise

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Did you get some milk?"

No not yet. I'm gagging for it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Did you get some sex?

No not yet. I'm gagging for it."

Im just being presumptuous with the next question.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I finally got my coffee at 2pm ish

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By *ilary and DonaldCouple
over a year ago

chingford

"I'm slightly hungovered and craving a coffee but I have NO MILK !!! What's a girl to do

Go black , you'll never go back.

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