FabSwingers.com forum: The male straightness questionnaire

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I think with all this confusion about straight guys being contacted by bi guys and bi guys being contacted by straight guys, that before a single male profile can be set at 'straight' new male members should have to complete a questionnaire on joining.

These questionnaires are then marked by a panel of 'Fabperts' who, in turn, decide on what sexuality status is tagged to the profile.

So, between us, can we come up with a series of questions that will make up said document ?

We will start off with :

1. Have you sat through at least one whole episode of Sex and the City and enjoyed it ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

2. Describe your soft furnishings.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

3. Before leaving a meets house, do you

a) wipe your cock on the curtains, or

b) make sure they are hanging properly and the tie backs are symmetrical

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Do you have cushions on your chairs/sofa?

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By * Kiwis and a BananaMan
over a year ago

Part of your 5 a day

"Do you have cushions on your chairs/sofa?

Hey hey hey hey! I object to this question

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Trick question :

Who is better : Erasure or Bronski Beat ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Do you have cushions on your chairs/sofa?

Hey hey hey hey! I object to this question "

Are they plumped at all times ?

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Do you have cushions on your chairs/sofa?

Hey hey hey hey! I object to this question "

https://www.fabswingers.com/forum/lounge/566833

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By *ilary and DonaldCouple
over a year ago

chingford

"Trick question :

Who is better : Erasure or Bronski Beat ?"

There is a singer in our local every 6 weeks or so.

By the end of the night he goes all jimmy Somerville and Andy Bell.

It's hilarious watching men in their 50's having a dance about to this music.

You'd swear you'd entered the gay twilight zone

It's the best night out ever.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you mince when you walk?

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By * Kiwis and a BananaMan
over a year ago

Part of your 5 a day

"Do you have cushions on your chairs/sofa?

Hey hey hey hey! I object to this question

https://www.fabswingers.com/forum/lounge/566833

Haha fine I shall answer N/A

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Now, were the curtains formula red or sunset orange?

If sunset orange, I would imagine the carpet to be no other than galaxy purple in which case my chestnut brown leather brogues would look silly

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By *oretta and SebrinaCouple (MM)
over a year ago

Rubery

Met a lot of straight guys in my time-paras Marines, bareknuckle fighters, firemen, martial arts experts, 2 Cage fighters, builders, etc. One thing in common- they see femininity where it exists.X

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By *iss_Samantha_LovecockTV/TS
over a year ago

bmth /poole sometimes blandford

have u ever put on womens clothing and become aroused

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By *iss_Samantha_LovecockTV/TS
over a year ago

bmth /poole sometimes blandford

"Met a lot of straight guys in my time-paras Marines, bareknuckle fighters, firemen, martial arts experts, 2 Cage fighters, builders, etc. One thing in common- they see femininity where it exists.X"

ive met quite a few marine commandos in the past

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By *oretta and SebrinaCouple (MM)
over a year ago

Rubery

"Met a lot of straight guys in my time-paras Marines, bareknuckle fighters, firemen, martial arts experts, 2 Cage fighters, builders, etc. One thing in common- they see femininity where it exists.X

ive met quite a few marine commandos in the past "
lovely, aren't they baby.xx

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By *oretta and SebrinaCouple (MM)
over a year ago

Rubery

"Do you mince when you walk?"
Non of my guys ever have. Most were very self confident, strong and fun to be with.

All considered themselves straight, and happy to be with a trans woman.x

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

People should be able to self-identify their sexual orientation. My attachments that measure penile tumescence, whilst undergoing sexual exposure, coupled with brain scanning is more than enough to back up their selections.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you have 3 or more stage musical soundtracks

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By *roticGoddessXXWoman
over a year ago

Richmond

completely loving this thread. I have nothing to offer at the moment, other than my heartfelt laughter at all of the responses. thanks.

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By *ubSirVient-DefinitionCouple
over a year ago

dukinfield

Do you like sucking another mans cock?

Do you enjoy being fucked up the arse or fucking another man's arse?

I think these would questions would give a definitive answer in all honesty.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

You have a new male colleague at work, do you :

a) shake him firmly by the hand and offer any help you can, or

b) follow him to the loo at break time and check his cock out

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

You have a free afternoon to watch TV, which do you choose :

a) Golden Girls

b) Steel Magnolias

c) The Six Nations Rugby

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

You visit the house of a friend for the first time, what do you notice first ?

a) the size of the telly and how much tech they have, or

b) the contents of their spice rack, or

c) which flavours of Nespresso pods they use

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"You have a free afternoon to watch TV, which do you choose :

a) Golden Girls

b) Steel Magnolias

c) The Six Nations Rugby"

I'm not sure there is a straight answer to that one.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You have a free afternoon to watch TV, which do you choose :

a) Golden Girls

b) Steel Magnolias

c) The Six Nations Rugby

I'm not sure there is a straight answer to that one.

Fair point

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Do you like sucking another mans cock?

Do you enjoy being fucked up the arse or fucking another man's arse?

I think these would questions would give a definitive answer in all honesty.

Do you think you 'might' enjoy ... is probably a better approach

A lot of messages we get are from Fab curious guys - although, confusingly, one of them had 8 veris, all from men

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you leave the light on when sucking cock

Do you swallow when sucking cock

Do you push back when a man is fucking your arse

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By *osieWoman
over a year ago

Wembley

Do you have fantasies of having sex with a woman?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do you have fantasies of having sex with a woman?"

Ooh harsh. Isn't 'having sex with a woman' just a fantasy for most men on here?!

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By *osieWoman
over a year ago

Wembley

"Do you have fantasies of having sex with a woman?

Ooh harsh. Isn't 'having sex with a woman' just a fantasy for most men on here?!

Now, that is harsh but ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Trick question :

Who is better : Erasure or Bronski Beat ?"

Always erasure

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By *even inchesMan
over a year ago

nottingham

What dog do you own

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Name your 3 favourite shoe designers...

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"I think with all this confusion about straight guys being contacted by bi guys and bi guys being contacted by straight guys, that before a single male profile can be set at 'straight' new male members should have to complete a questionnaire on joining.

These questionnaires are then marked by a panel of 'Fabperts' who, in turn, decide on what sexuality status is tagged to the profile.

So, between us, can we come up with a series of questions that will make up said document ?

We will start off with :

1. Have you sat through at least one whole episode of Sex and the City and enjoyed it ?

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

But I ain't straight

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"But I ain't straight "

But you are an exception to most rules Dear Joseph x

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"But I ain't straight

But you are an exception to most rules Dear Joseph x"

Have we met?

*changes avatar*

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"But I ain't straight

But you are an exception to most rules Dear Joseph x

Have we met?

*changes avatar*"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do you have cushions on your chairs/sofa?

Yes. But they're un matched and on a sofa in a shed surrounded by tools. I can reach a chainsaw and a ferret from where I am so ya know..I figure it adds balance to the cushions.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Name your 3 favourite shoe designers..."

Magnum boots.

Don't need a second or third

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You have a free afternoon to watch TV, which do you choose :

a) Golden Girls

b) Steel Magnolias

c) The Six Nations Rugby"

Golden Girls

ain't seen it in years and the others are crap

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think this questionnaire is floored.

Firstly I have scatter cushions

Was it a shade of red or orange....they all look the same

I've done the sex and the city tour of New York

I don't really understand the cage fighter/marine comment.

I would've thought the questionnaire or test only needs two questions....

Are you attracted to the same sex?

Would you have sex with some one of the same sex?

Failing that, I'd go with....when you have a bad day, do you cry in to a tub of ice cream whilst watching made in Manhattan?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think this questionnaire is floored.

Firstly I have scatter cushions

Was it a shade of red or orange....they all look the same

I've done the sex and the city tour of New York

I don't really understand the cage fighter/marine comment.

I would've thought the questionnaire or test only needs two questions....

Are you attracted to the same sex?

Would you have sex with some one of the same sex?

Failing that, I'd go with....when you have a bad day, do you cry in to a tub of ice cream whilst watching made in Manhattan?

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By *ittleAcornMan
over a year ago

visiting the beach

"Trick question :

Who is better : Erasure or Bronski Beat ?

There is a singer in our local every 6 weeks or so.

By the end of the night he goes all jimmy Somerville and Andy Bell.

It's hilarious watching men in their 50's having a dance about to this music.

You'd swear you'd entered the gay twilight zone

It's the best night out ever.

Sounds bloody brilliant.

Have I failed the test?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I was about to suggest GHDs then I reread the title

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I was about to suggest GHDs then I reread the title

That's made my night

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Trick question :

Who is better : Erasure or Bronski Beat ?

There is a singer in our local every 6 weeks or so.

By the end of the night he goes all jimmy Somerville and Andy Bell.

It's hilarious watching men in their 50's having a dance about to this music.

You'd swear you'd entered the gay twilight zone

It's the best night out ever.

Sounds bloody brilliant.

Have I failed the test?"

Just one last test

Do you, or have you ever, owned a 'Frankie says Relax' t-shirt ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Trick question :

Who is better : Erasure or Bronski Beat ?"

Erasure! Erasure!

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"2. Describe your soft furnishings."

Tasteful and extensive. There's always something to lounge on.

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"3. Before leaving a meets house, do you

a) wipe your cock on the curtains, or

b) make sure they are hanging properly and the tie backs are symmetrical"

a followed by b

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By *ittleAcornMan
over a year ago

visiting the beach

"Trick question :

It's hilarious watching men in their 50's having a dance about to this music.

You'd swear you'd entered the gay twilight zone

It's the best night out ever.

Sounds bloody brilliant.

Have I failed the test?

Just one last test

Do you, or have you ever, owned a 'Frankie says Relax' t-shirt ?"

No, though I did have an Ipswich Town FC shirt. Which is probably worse.

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"Trick question :

Who is better : Erasure or Bronski Beat ?"

Don;t know

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"Do you like sucking another mans cock?

Do you enjoy being fucked up the arse or fucking another man's arse?

I think these would questions would give a definitive answer in all honesty.

No.

Not really. Very much yes

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"You have a new male colleague at work, do you :

a) shake him firmly by the hand and offer any help you can, or

b) follow him to the loo at break time and check his cock out "

A then B

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"You have a free afternoon to watch TV, which do you choose :

a) Golden Girls

b) Steel Magnolias

c) The Six Nations Rugby"

None of the above

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"You visit the house of a friend for the first time, what do you notice first ?

a) the size of the telly and how much tech they have, or

b) the contents of their spice rack, or

c) which flavours of Nespresso pods they use "

Always go to the toilet - it's the most revealing room in anyone's house

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Trick question :

Who is better : Erasure or Bronski Beat ?

There is a singer in our local every 6 weeks or so.

By the end of the night he goes all jimmy Somerville and Andy Bell.

It's hilarious watching men in their 50's having a dance about to this music.

You'd swear you'd entered the gay twilight zone

It's the best night out ever.

Sounds bloody brilliant.

Have I failed the test?

Just one last test

Do you, or have you ever, owned a 'Frankie says Relax' t-shirt ?"

You forgot "Do you stuff two balloons up your top at parties and dance around pretending to be Dolly Parton?"

Or "Drink pints at the bar all night?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Who's cock would you rather suck?

1. Johnny Depp

2. Brad Pitt

3. Marc Almonds

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"Who's cock would you rather suck?

1. Johnny Depp

2. Brad Pitt

3. Marc Almonds

None.

I don;t like sucking dick and they're all too old

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think I might be gay.

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"I think I might be gay.

You might get laid then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think I might be gay.

You do the balloon thing don't you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think I might be gay.

You might get laid then

Can I watch?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think I might be gay.

You might get laid then

Can I watch? "

Pleeeeeeease!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think I might be gay.

You do the balloon thing don't you. "

I don't even need a party to do it.

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"I think I might be gay.

You might get laid then

Can I watch?

Pleeeeeeease! "

I don't think Lib is ready for me.

He'd need training and breaking in first.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1)Do you suck or get your cock sucked by a male/tv.

2)Do you give or recieve anal to a male/tv.

Surely thise two questions will beat asking any other if they answer yes to either then clearly bisexual.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think I might be gay.

You might get laid then

Can I watch?

Pleeeeeeease!

I don't think Lib is ready for me.

He'd need training and breaking in first. "

I can help. I have small hands

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By *tace 309TV/TS
over a year ago

durham

"1)Do you suck or get your cock sucked by a male/tv.

2)Do you give or recieve anal to a male/tv.

Surely thise two questions will beat asking any other if they answer yes to either then clearly bisexual.

"
well I've met some who have done both 1 and 2 and they still insist they are straight with some its more of a mental block .

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"I think I might be gay.

You might get laid then

Can I watch?

Pleeeeeeease!

I don't think Lib is ready for me.

He'd need training and breaking in first.

I can help. I have small hands

Are you Donald Trump?

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By *ittleAcornMan
over a year ago

visiting the beach

"I think I might be gay.

You might get laid then

Can I watch?

Pleeeeeeease!

I don't think Lib is ready for me.

He'd need training and breaking in first.

I can help. I have small hands

I have a picture in my head of you on his back in a Stetson and spurs. It's not helping me get any work done...

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales

Is that nice sounding car that just passed you on the motorway

A. Red

B. A Mercedes Benz

C. An MB AMG C63 with options pack.

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"Is that nice sounding car that just passed you on the motorway

A. Red

B. A Mercedes Benz

C. An MB AMG C63 with options pack.

Meaningless to me. A car is something with 4 wheels that someone else drives me from A to B in.

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

Straight guys can be so competitive. Even when it comes to giving gay bj's.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A4e1hL89ppo

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales

"Is that nice sounding car that just passed you on the motorway

A. Red

B. A Mercedes Benz

C. An MB AMG C63 with options pack.

Meaningless to me. A car is something with 4 wheels that someone else drives me from A to B in."

Weirdo

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"Is that nice sounding car that just passed you on the motorway

A. Red

B. A Mercedes Benz

C. An MB AMG C63 with options pack.

Meaningless to me. A car is something with 4 wheels that someone else drives me from A to B in.

Weirdo

You say that like it's a bad thing?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think I might be gay.

You might get laid then

Can I watch?

Pleeeeeeease!

I don't think Lib is ready for me.

He'd need training and breaking in first.

I can help. I have small hands

Are you Donald Trump?

My hair would suggest not.

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"I think I might be gay.

You might get laid then

Can I watch?

Pleeeeeeease!

I don't think Lib is ready for me.

He'd need training and breaking in first.

I can help. I have small hands

Are you Donald Trump?

My hair would suggest not. "

Thank fudge for that. Never can be too sure on t'internet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think I might be gay.

You might get laid then

Can I watch?

Pleeeeeeease!

I don't think Lib is ready for me.

He'd need training and breaking in first.

I can help. I have small hands

I have a picture in my head of you on his back in a Stetson and spurs. It's not helping me get any work done..."

Spurs? You pervert!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think I might be gay.

You might get laid then

Can I watch?

Pleeeeeeease!

I don't think Lib is ready for me.

He'd need training and breaking in first.

I can help. I have small hands

Are you Donald Trump?

My hair would suggest not.

Thank fudge for that. Never can be too sure on t'internet"

I have boobs too

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"I think I might be gay.

You might get laid then

Can I watch?

Pleeeeeeease!

I don't think Lib is ready for me.

He'd need training and breaking in first.

I can help. I have small hands

Are you Donald Trump?

My hair would suggest not.

Thank fudge for that. Never can be too sure on t'internet

I have boobs too

So does he

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By *ittleAcornMan
over a year ago

visiting the beach

"I think I might be gay.

You might get laid then

Can I watch?

Pleeeeeeease!

I don't think Lib is ready for me.

He'd need training and breaking in first.

I can help. I have small hands

Are you Donald Trump?

My hair would suggest not.

Thank fudge for that. Never can be too sure on t'internet

I have boobs too

so does The-Donald.

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By *ndigo40Woman
over a year ago

secret town

Do you wear skinny jeans?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's quite simple, just ask them to name all the shades of colour in a picture.

If they stumble after 5 they are straight,more than 30 they are fake

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"Do you wear skinny jeans?"

No, and that's just pathetic on any male, straight or gay or whatever

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

In about a year's time, when you've had no straight meets in here, would you reconsider your 'straightness'

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