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Guys jokes

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

How many men does it take to open a beer ? None .It should be opened by the time she brings it................. How do u fix a women's watch ? You don't.There is a clock on the oven ...... Why do men pass gas more than women ? because women wont shut up long enough to build up pressure .................. I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months - I don't like to interrupt her . what do you call a women with two brain cells ? pregnant DONT WOREY LADYS I WILL DO A THREAD WITH JOKES ABOUT GUYS TO ADD UR OWN I WILL BE ADDING MORE

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"DONT WOREY LADYS I WILL DO A THREAD WITH JOKES ABOUT GUYS TO ADD UR OWN I WILL BE ADDING MORE "

If I pay you, will you promise not to?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ok, a few things you need to know.

On here the guys are known as the doris', and the girls are the pussy possy/pisse possy.

You're in one camp of the other, except for soapy who's just plain fookin camp anyway.

We dorises stick together so if the bints want their own male bashing joke thread they can frickin well start one themselves.

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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest


"On here the guys are known as the doris', and the girls are the pussy possy/pisse possy.

You're in one camp of the other, except for soapy who's just plain fookin camp anyway.

"

Youre showing your age now...

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

thank you but I'm going to get bashed and bullied no matter what i do sad thing is no one can take a joke or see that it is women like that women who have been attacking me from day one for as Little as saying hello

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Youre showing your age now..."

Got a year on you though.

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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest


"Youre showing your age now...

Got a year on you though. "

Bstd

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Come on then, let's have some more jokes then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I shoved a grape up my girlfreinds arse last night. She didn't say anything, just let out a little wine!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

lmfao i got to wright that one down i cant put up any more jokes what ever i put up will offend some one and at the head off the pack will be those that don't want me on this site but u sound like u will do fine on your own

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"lmfao i got to wright that one down i cant put up any more jokes what ever i put up will offend some one and at the head off the pack will be those that don't want me on this site but u sound like u will do fine on your own "

Take no notice and post them up, you will offend some and not others so post away Martyr

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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago

Hull


"lmfao i got to wright that one down i cant put up any more jokes what ever i put up will offend some one and at the head off the pack will be those that don't want me on this site but u sound like u will do fine on your own "

Go on son! Take no notice of them!

Cos if you do, they only win!

I for one, am awaiting what you can throw at us! Sod the others!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

An old couple return to the hotel they honeymooned in 30 years previous. They asked for the same room as they had before, and ordered the same food from room service that they had before. It was served on the balcony exactly the same as before and they sat in the same seats stark naked looking at the sunset as they had done before.

The wife looked lovingly at her husband and said, "This is so romantic, it's exactly how it was before. Don't you think so too darling?"

The man looked at her for a few moments and said, "Almost sweetheart, but 30 years ago your left tit wasn't in your soup."

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston


"On here the guys are known as the doris', and the girls are the pussy possy/pisse possy.

You're in one camp of the other, except for soapy who's just plain fookin camp anyway."

not forgetting snoggy who is Miss Butlins 2011

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I'm not going to fight back they are the sort of women i was talking about sadly no one can see that I would ask some off my friends to come speak up for me but u no what it will make me like them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm not going to fight back they are the sort of women i was talking about sadly no one can see that I would ask some off my friends to come speak up for me but u no what it will make me like them "

But you ARE fighting back by continuing to post about it. Let it drop and concentrate on the positive comments you've been getting.

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn


"I'm not going to fight back they are the sort of women i was talking about sadly no one can see that I would ask some off my friends to come speak up for me but u no what it will make me like them "

You had a rant last nite (which we most of us have done at some point) forget it and move on.

You will never please everyone.

Be yourself, and stop apologising all the time, And the comment above makes you sound full of self pity, these need to stop. Have fun, ignore comment you dont like and carry on using the forums.

This is a little bit of advice from my point of view.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

fair enough thank you for your point of view

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I'm only replying to posts to be fair but i get what u are saying

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

How do blonde's brain cells die ? alone___________________________________Why does a blond smile at lightning ? she thinks she's getting her picture taken ________________________________

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo


"I'm only replying to posts to be fair but i get what u are saying "

You are taking things the wrong way...Wishy's post was an ongoing joke on the forums, and he was trying to get you to join in on it.

Forget about your other thread and just join in.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

And OMG at Kev's new avatar

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I'm trying to very confusing

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Not technically a joke, but entirely true.

An ex g/f of mine decided to top up the oil in her car, 10 mins later she came back in the house asking if we had a funnel. Upon further investigation for the need for said funnel, I discovered that she had been trying to pour the oil into the dipstick hole!

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Isn't that were it goes then?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

hahahaha got me pen and paper out i am having that one lol

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago


"Isn't that were it goes then? "

No you turn the car upside down and pour it in the exhaust pipe

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