FabSwingers.com forum: FWB has dumped me..not sure wether to carry on swinging now..

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

My FWB of 3 years dumped me yesterday via Kik message. Was very attached to him. He met someone in real world about 10 days ago. Quite upset, especially as he didn't have the guts to tell me to my face.x

Not sure what to do now, wether to carry on swinging, which I do enjoy. Or wether to leave Fab. Or look for a new FWB. XXX

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if he was just a fb then thats the way of it - harsh but true

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My FWB of 3 years dumped me yesterday via Kik message. Was very attached to him. He met someone in real world about 10 days ago. Quite upset, especially as he didn't have the guts to tell me to my face.x

Not sure what to do now, wether to carry on swinging, which I do enjoy. Or wether to leave Fab. Or look for a new FWB. XXX"

Any break up is going to be tuff sweet, sending lots of hugs. If you like fab then stay as that's what it's here for fun and you never know a new FWB may come along the way. Just enjoy the forums and banter for a while and even hide profile for a few weeks of needed. X X

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *roticGoddessXXWoman
over a year ago

Richmond

Not sure what to do now, wether to carry on swinging, which I do enjoy. Or wether to leave Fab. Or look for a new FWB. XXX"

That's harsh... Just very harsh. \sorry to hear it, and hope you are doing ok. 3 years and no warning is difficult.

Go with your gut feeling of what you need to do to take care of yourself, and the answer will come to you. Good luck.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe he needed more then sex .. This sites about no strings sex if you are looking for the same as him get on a dating site and make it about dating not easy sex.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ysnomiaMan
over a year ago

Preston

*Hugs* Yeah, that does sound a little harsh. As I've found out FWB still carries enough emotion from the friendship part, and you wouldnt accept that kind of behaviour from someone who was meant to be your friend IRL, would you.

Anyway, I'm sure if you wanted to look for another friend around here you wouldnt be short of offers.

Whatever you decide, I wish you all the best.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you wished for more then sex why not say to him ? can you not tex and ask him ..? even if he has a girl-friend would give you peace of mind maybe.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

Not sure what to do now, wether to carry on swinging, which I do enjoy. Or wether to leave Fab. Or look for a new FWB. XXX"

the pain is going to be intense gorgeous hugs and cuddles on the way to you xxx .

I have been through what you are going through on more than one occasion ,it feels like apart of you has been ripped away it hurts you cant seem to think of anything apart from the friend lover confident you have lost .

the pain is no different that if you lost a love one because the truth is you were emotionally attached to the other person that's what made the relationship special and so fulfilling.

you start to think what's the point of it all if this is how I'm going to be left feeling , you find you haven't the heart to do much let alone contemplate swinging or meeting someone new .

time is your friend it doesn't heal but it does dull the pain to the point where you can start to function more like your old self .

chin up girl in time you will start to remember what was great about the relationship instead of just feeling pain at that point you will be ready to make a decision about the future because in my opinion right now with it all so raw its best to hold off until your more emotionally stable .

big manly hug for you because your honest out pouring of feeling do you credit and show you to be a truly wonderful person in my humble opinion xxxx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *orwegian BlueMan
over a year ago

Iceland, but Aldi is closer..

That is very harsh, after 3 years I would have hoped there would have been enough rapport between you so that he felt he could have spoken with you about the situation.

Just to do it by a text message... Definitely not a friend..

If that's how he deals with emotional situations, well, I cannot see him maintaining an actual physical relationship where there is much more expectation..

Move on, you will find another fwb, fab isn't too short of guys, as you say, you enjoy the scene, so why leave just because of the actions of one inconsiderate man.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's not a break up though.

Any fwb or fb situation is always with the knowledge that if they meet somone for a relationship its over

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just keep swimming

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"It's not a break up though.

Any fwb or fb situation is always with the knowledge that if they meet somone for a relationship its over"

Doesn't mean that it's not upsetting especially if it just breaks all ties and not even the friendship remains.

OP take some time out and adjust. You'll come back to it.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think reading the ops profile sheds some light on the matter.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think reading the ops profile sheds some light on the matter."

yup - open relationship with former fwb puts a different light on things

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One problem with moving from fwb to a relationship is the new partner may have doubts/concerns/intimidated by the former fwb who are now just friends.

And so there can be pressure to not just go to being friends but to cut ties.

Most people get cheated on or see a friend cheated on, and somone comming from a multi partner situation who still sees those former fb will make a lot paranoid

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A FWB dumped me by text once, that was is the days before KIK.

Has anyone been dumped by semaphore?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eliWoman
over a year ago

Do what feels right OP. You'll realise whatever that is soon enough.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do what feels right OP. You'll realise whatever that is soon enough."

Best advise.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rbane PlayerMan
over a year ago

London

Not sure what to do now, wether to carry on swinging, which I do enjoy. Or wether to leave Fab. Or look for a new FWB. XXX

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personality I've never had a FWB for anything more than few months to me 3 years is more than no strings hence why it's so upsetting

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Open relationship with a fwb !!! Obviously you have let you feelings for this person get in the way of your agreed arrangement, in all respect 3yrs I should imagine you would start having feelings for someone, and we have all been there and it's hard to be stricked on yourself where feelings start getting in the way it puts you in a no mans land and unfortunately someone gets hurt, I had a fwb/fb everything was going great then she started txtin me every day asking when I'm seeing her again and new I had to break away cus I new she started getting feelings, it's sad but have to be crawl to be kind, imagine if I'd left it longer!! You can't let yourself get emotionally attached it's either something casual or a full blown relationship and not something in the middle (no mans land) your choice

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And the jaded cynic in me thinks just hide your profile and get the mods to delete this thread because fir every genuine response there will undoubtedly be people thinking that you are both vulnerable and available right now and will try and take advantage of that

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Personality I've never had a FWB for anything more than few months to me 3 years is more than no strings hence why it's so upsetting "
same here keep it short and sweet 3-4 months is good

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At least you got a text.... my last fwb just blocked me

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd take any friendships made revolving around sex with a pinch of salt

It's really easy making friends when sex is on the plate

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rnortholtMan
over a year ago

Waveney Valley

Bit of a git for the way he did it. I'd say, just move on, but you sound very cut up so maybe hide the profile while you have a think about things?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

I can imagine how you feel. 3 yrs is a long time, he should of spoken to you face to face imo, like friends do.

Take a break but move on, quickly, don't beat yourself up. He isn't is he?

(((Hugs)))

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ancs MinxWoman
over a year ago

Burnley

"I think reading the ops profile sheds some light on the matter.

yup - open relationship with former fwb puts a different light on things"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry to hear that OP, if you enjoy swinging then carry on i say.

On another note, and i'll probably have everyone shout at me for saying this, but surely FWB exceeds being just FWB past a certain point?

If you meet the same person regularly, does it stop being FWB and become an affair?

If feelings and emotions are there then surely no strings attached is no longer possible? And after 3 years he must have had some feelings for the OP, unless he's cold as ice.

Just wondering aloud.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ah that's a hard one OP, he took the easy way out via kik.

Happened to me which is why I joined Fabs but at least he did it in person & we're still friends now.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

TBH I think the moniker FWB says it all, if you wanted it to be more it would have happened by now. whilst I feel sympathy for your situation. It cannot distract from the fact that the boundaries were established as part of the arrangement. This thing of ours whilst having wonderful joyous and exciting moments, can have low and unhappy moments. Be resilient, it's always the darkest before the dawn, and besides you have more to offer.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It may be a FWB situation, but after 3 years, I'd expect more than a KiK message.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry to hear that OP, if you enjoy swinging then carry on i say.

On another note, and i'll probably have everyone shout at me for saying this, but surely FWB exceeds being just FWB past a certain point?

If you meet the same person regularly, does it stop being FWB and become an affair?

If feelings and emotions are there then surely no strings attached is no longer possible? And after 3 years he must have had some feelings for the OP, unless he's cold as ice.

Just wondering aloud. "

Yeah, I agree with this. Even if there aren't any strong feelings, surely after 3 years, you become friends and there's a degree of comfort there.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *entle giraffeMan
over a year ago

Minehead

"It may be a FWB situation, but after 3 years, I'd expect more than a KiK message. "

to this.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry to hear that OP, if you enjoy swinging then carry on i say.

On another note, and i'll probably have everyone shout at me for saying this, but surely FWB exceeds being just FWB past a certain point?

If you meet the same person regularly, does it stop being FWB and become an affair?

If feelings and emotions are there then surely no strings attached is no longer possible? And after 3 years he must have had some feelings for the OP, unless he's cold as ice.

Just wondering aloud.

Yeah, I agree with this. Even if there aren't any strong feelings, surely after 3 years, you become friends and there's a degree of comfort there."

Having delt with tears, public break downs and anger on multiple occasions when ending things i honestly think distance is good when ending these "non relationships".

I do wonder though if the FWB ever knew that the op considered it a relationship or if it was only fuck buddies to him.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

", it's always the darkest before the dawn, and besides you have more to offer."

Completley off topic and not a dig at you, but i hate that expression.

It's just so clearly untrue, it's darkest hours bedore dawn, it gets slowly lighter towards dawn, its brightest before the dawn :p

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The 'f' in fwb stands for friend. This is not the way a friend behaves. Obviously having an fwb or fb suggests sex without emotional complication but this is very commomn and i've experienced it myself. You have my condolences but if you enjoy swinging don't give up, take a break for a while and then throw youself back into it, it's the best way to move on. X

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry to hear that OP, if you enjoy swinging then carry on i say.

On another note, and i'll probably have everyone shout at me for saying this, but surely FWB exceeds being just FWB past a certain point?

If you meet the same person regularly, does it stop being FWB and become an affair?

If feelings and emotions are there then surely no strings attached is no longer possible? And after 3 years he must have had some feelings for the OP, unless he's cold as ice.

Just wondering aloud.

Yeah, I agree with this. Even if there aren't any strong feelings, surely after 3 years, you become friends and there's a degree of comfort there.

Having delt with tears, public break downs and anger on multiple occasions when ending things i honestly think distance is good when ending these "non relationships".

I do wonder though if the FWB ever knew that the op considered it a relationship or if it was only fuck buddies to him.

There are still ways to do it that aren't so impersonal. Although, of it was an open-relationship and the FWB knew that, they've just reached upper level dick status for ending it via KiK...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It may be a FWB situation, but after 3 years, I'd expect more than a KiK message. "

True, but some people are not brave enough to do that, its just further testament to the situation. In future people should just drop it in by the way as we are fwb if you do meet someone else, then do not tell me via a messaging app.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he girl with dreadlocksWoman
over a year ago

need to know basis in Wolverhampton

There are different types of relationships they may not have had "the big one" but after 3 years they had a relationship, you deserved to be treated better then that OP and when he try's to crawl back after it doesn't work out with this 10 day old relationship for the love of god tell him to go fuck himself but don't give up fab for him he is so not worth it.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There are different types of relationships they may not have had "the big one" but after 3 years they had a relationship, you deserved to be treated better then that OP and when he try's to crawl back after it doesn't work out with this 10 day old relationship for the love of god tell him to go fuck himself but don't give up fab for him he is so not worth it.

Xx"

Remember folks when your FRIEND with benifits finds somone they love you should totaly wish it fails so you can mock and belittle them.

You should totaly not be happy for them.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry to hear that OP, if you enjoy swinging then carry on i say.

On another note, and i'll probably have everyone shout at me for saying this, but surely FWB exceeds being just FWB past a certain point?

If you meet the same person regularly, does it stop being FWB and become an affair?

If feelings and emotions are there then surely no strings attached is no longer possible? And after 3 years he must have had some feelings for the OP, unless he's cold as ice.

Just wondering aloud.

Yeah, I agree with this. Even if there aren't any strong feelings, surely after 3 years, you become friends and there's a degree of comfort there.

Having delt with tears, public break downs and anger on multiple occasions when ending things i honestly think distance is good when ending these "non relationships".

I do wonder though if the FWB ever knew that the op considered it a relationship or if it was only fuck buddies to him.

There are still ways to do it that aren't so impersonal. Although, of it was an open-relationship and the FWB knew that, they've just reached upper level dick status for ending it via KiK... "

Tbh i think we're getting so little info that its a bit jumping ro cobclusions.

The text could have said

"hey that girl i met the other week i think we really have a shot and shes not into this lifestyle so I'm sorry but we cant sleep together anymore but we can still stay friends, let me know what you decide"

And then she told him to go fuck himself or blocked him or whatever

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry to hear that OP, if you enjoy swinging then carry on i say.

On another note, and i'll probably have everyone shout at me for saying this, but surely FWB exceeds being just FWB past a certain point?

If you meet the same person regularly, does it stop being FWB and become an affair?

If feelings and emotions are there then surely no strings attached is no longer possible? And after 3 years he must have had some feelings for the OP, unless he's cold as ice.

Just wondering aloud.

Yeah, I agree with this. Even if there aren't any strong feelings, surely after 3 years, you become friends and there's a degree of comfort there.

Having delt with tears, public break downs and anger on multiple occasions when ending things i honestly think distance is good when ending these "non relationships".

I do wonder though if the FWB ever knew that the op considered it a relationship or if it was only fuck buddies to him.

There are still ways to do it that aren't so impersonal. Although, of it was an open-relationship and the FWB knew that, they've just reached upper level dick status for ending it via KiK...

Tbh i think we're getting so little info that its a bit jumping ro cobclusions.

The text could have said

And then she told him to go fuck himself or blocked him or whatever

Quite right! We never get the full story on here. However, personally, I'd expect at least a phone call after 3 years. Although, I'm not naive enough to realise that this is how other people think.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry to hear that OP, if you enjoy swinging then carry on i say.

On another note, and i'll probably have everyone shout at me for saying this, but surely FWB exceeds being just FWB past a certain point?

If you meet the same person regularly, does it stop being FWB and become an affair?

If feelings and emotions are there then surely no strings attached is no longer possible? And after 3 years he must have had some feelings for the OP, unless he's cold as ice.

Just wondering aloud.

Yeah, I agree with this. Even if there aren't any strong feelings, surely after 3 years, you become friends and there's a degree of comfort there.

Having delt with tears, public break downs and anger on multiple occasions when ending things i honestly think distance is good when ending these "non relationships".

I do wonder though if the FWB ever knew that the op considered it a relationship or if it was only fuck buddies to him.

There are still ways to do it that aren't so impersonal. Although, of it was an open-relationship and the FWB knew that, they've just reached upper level dick status for ending it via KiK...

Tbh i think we're getting so little info that its a bit jumping ro cobclusions.

The text could have said

And then she told him to go fuck himself or blocked him or whatever

Quite right! We never get the full story on here. However, personally, I'd expect at least a phone call after 3 years. Although, I'm not naive enough to realise that this is how other people think.

I think that might be an age/how you were raised thing.

I hate phone calls much prefer texts as they dont interrupt what im doing and i have time to consider my reply rather than being put on the spot like a phone call.

I think thats the same for a lot of people these days.

If they get used to texting over phones then its just the norm.

Its not seen as less personal tto l text than to ring, but simply less rude and intrusive

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry to hear that OP, if you enjoy swinging then carry on i say.

On another note, and i'll probably have everyone shout at me for saying this, but surely FWB exceeds being just FWB past a certain point?

If you meet the same person regularly, does it stop being FWB and become an affair?

If feelings and emotions are there then surely no strings attached is no longer possible? And after 3 years he must have had some feelings for the OP, unless he's cold as ice.

Just wondering aloud.

Yeah, I agree with this. Even if there aren't any strong feelings, surely after 3 years, you become friends and there's a degree of comfort there.

Having delt with tears, public break downs and anger on multiple occasions when ending things i honestly think distance is good when ending these "non relationships".

I do wonder though if the FWB ever knew that the op considered it a relationship or if it was only fuck buddies to him.

There are still ways to do it that aren't so impersonal. Although, of it was an open-relationship and the FWB knew that, they've just reached upper level dick status for ending it via KiK...

Tbh i think we're getting so little info that its a bit jumping ro cobclusions.

The text could have said

And then she told him to go fuck himself or blocked him or whatever

Quite right! We never get the full story on here. However, personally, I'd expect at least a phone call after 3 years. Although, I'm not naive enough to realise that this is how other people think.

I think that might be an age/how you were raised thing.

I hate phone calls much prefer texts as they dont interrupt what im doing and i have time to consider my reply rather than being put on the spot like a phone call.

I think thats the same for a lot of people these days.

If they get used to texting over phones then its just the norm.

Its not seen as less personal tto l text than to ring, but simply less rude and intrusive "

Alright, I'm only 4 years older than you!

I wouldn't say a phone call is rude and intrusive. Texting has simply become an easy way of communicating. Emphasis on the easy.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *exmanMan
over a year ago

Stainforth

Not sure what to do now, wether to carry on swinging, which I do enjoy. Or wether to leave Fab. Or look for a new FWB. XXX"
it's

just like falling off a bike The best thing to do is get back on it and start riding again I know it can be harsh because you do building attached to someone if it's not love but honestly I've just had a look at your photos and somehow I don't think it's going to be too long before you find yourself a merry fwb your a very sexy woman x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

id struggle with the fact someone thought i was only good enough to shag but never good enough to date.. hats off to you folk with friends with benefits..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Met someone 10 days ago

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unfortunately it's the nature of the beast, people and their situations change. I've tried not to invest in only one man on here and when one fwb leaves, I just look for another. I am very fond of my regular partners and so when one leaves or moves in, yes it can hurt a little but it's something we all have to accept.

I'd suggest you let the dust settle, keep chatting in here, get your confidence high and then get yourself a new meet. There are, after all, so many hot and gorgeous guys on here to chose from. x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I've never had a FWB relationship but it seems to me that its basically like dating but you can see other people for sex and if you don't want to continue you don't owe the other person an explanation. It sounds like someone is always going to be left hurt and the slight feeling that they haven't got the right to be.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ezzelsMan
over a year ago

cheshire and north wales

How strange..I've just been leaving through a copy of glamour magazine at my dentist..yes..I'm a man..and there was an article called 10 rules about fwb..I suggest you google it and the clouds will be lifted....x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't give up swinging if you enjoy it.

Personally I'd cut all contact with him now and take control back. Because if the 10 day real world relationship doesnt work : will he be back? Don't get into that cycle of accepting being second best. Be someone's priority not just an option.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"Sorry to hear that OP, if you enjoy swinging then carry on i say.

On another note, and i'll probably have everyone shout at me for saying this, but surely FWB exceeds being just FWB past a certain point?

If you meet the same person regularly, does it stop being FWB and become an affair?

If feelings and emotions are there then surely no strings attached is no longer possible? And after 3 years he must have had some feelings for the OP, unless he's cold as ice.

Just wondering aloud.

Yeah, I agree with this. Even if there aren't any strong feelings, surely after 3 years, you become friends and there's a degree of comfort there."

yes you do become friends and more but remember they are half way relationships. I have never ended a fwb relationship as I have no need to as they give me what I need from them .but I've had then end because someone comes along who can give more than me to my fwb .

hurts like hell some have tried to stay friends but that normally involves secrets which they need to keep from there new possible life partner so its sometimes best to just swallow the pain and have a clean brake .

I don't hate any of my ex fwb no matter how they ended it for the simple fact they did what they needed to do to have a chance of a better happier life ,how can I be mad at someone I cared deeply about for wanting that .

I not defending the guy or how he choose to end it but maybe he thought if he tried to do it face to face he wouldn't have been able to go through with it maybe he's hurting to .

I had a fwb cry her eyes out on my shoulders when she had to finish things up with me did that fact ease my own pain no nothing except things not changing could have done that .

pain is pain no matter what way its delivered sadly .

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"id struggle with the fact someone thought i was only good enough to shag but never good enough to date.. hats off to you folk with friends with benefits..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

If you got that attached it probably a good thing it ended

I've lost one last year in a similar manner by a text. I just said great news hope your happy and we can stay in touch, we're still very good friends we just socialise now and don't fuck anymore

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"id struggle with the fact someone thought i was only good enough to shag but never good enough to date.. hats off to you folk with friends with benefits..

Its not a case of not good enough just you dont live each other in that way.

I've got people who i love dearly as friends and we shag but we're not in love.

But our of curiosity does this mean youre only looking to date on here ?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hide your profile ...take a break and carry on ...you'll find another willing fwb x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure what to do now, wether to carry on swinging, which I do enjoy. Or wether to leave Fab. Or look for a new FWB. XXX"

Oh dear, it's another post from me which requires getting comfy and putting that kettle on I'm afraid! I should really buy shares in Russell Hobbs...

Technically as you were FWB and this was made clear between the pair of you he has done nothing wrong and it's understandable that if he has met someone to start a relationship with he has done the decent thing.

I would however question his tact by the manner of which he let you know; I am aware that social media is a huge part of modern life, but when it comes to emotional attachments, which after 3 years you would obviously have, any major changes like this should be discussed the "old-fashioned" way, face to face as I hardly believe a kik message offers complete closure for you, which a lot of people need.

Of course you are going to be hurt by this, as even though you weren't in a relationship per se, it is tantamount to a very close friend (which you were owing to the duration and your shared feelings of intimacy) turning around and saying they don't want to be friends with you any more. The reasons behind his decision are plain enough, but that of course doesn't stop nagging doubts about them going around in your head, because whether they are illogical or not, your mind is a maelstrom of emotions right now.

As a result when things get too much emotionally it's often a knee-jerk reaction to make other major changes in order to try and restore the calm. The thought of "If I change this, this and this that were part and parcel of my association with this person, I can get full closure and put myself back on an even keel" however right or wrong they may be are completely understandable.

My advice for you would be not to leave fab or the swinging lifestyle as a result of this. By all means take a step back for a short period, restrict yourself to chatting on the forums if need be, at least this way you will still have contact with others who have enjoyed similar lifestyles without cutting yourself off.

And in the meantime if it is possible see if you can meet up with the man you were involved with; make it clear that you're not stalking him, you don't expect anything of a sexual nature and that it can merely be in a public place such as a coffee shop etc. Just let him know that you need to say goodbye for your own mental happiness and that you bear him no ill will.

Put correctly he shouldn't have a problem with this and his new partner presumably has gone through this before or something similar so should at least understand it, make it clear she can come along if she feels compromised.

Once you do meet up, be frank and honest with each other, thank him for being honest with you and sparing some of your hurt and wish him well in his new relationship. Whilst the pain and regret may still be there to a certain degree, it will help you deal with this long term and give you the necessary closure that you need.

If this is at all possible I'd do this before you seek a new FWB if that is your choice.

Good luck!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

"id struggle with the fact someone thought i was only good enough to shag but never good enough to date.. hats off to you folk with friends with benefits..

Its not a case of not good enough just you dont live each other in that way.

I've got people who i love dearly as friends and we shag but we're not in love.

But our of curiosity does this mean youre only looking to date on here ?"

I'm same two fab friends I love dearly as friends and happen to shag but wouldn't want more from them than that, nor would they from me.

I don't think many can understand that kind of connection unless they're capable of it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he girl with dreadlocksWoman
over a year ago

need to know basis in Wolverhampton

Remember folks when your FRIEND with benifits finds somone they love you should totaly wish it fails so you can mock and belittle them.

You should totaly not be happy for them."

Yeah cause that's what I said.

You think he found love after 10 days?

I have a FWB we talk every day we see other people, if he met someone else he would do the decent thing and tell me that he meant someone and that it might lead somewhere and no doubt ask my advise so it wouldn't be a shock and hurt so much and yes I would be very happy for him. If he just dumped me over a text with no warning then yes dam straight I would be pissed.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn't jump to any hasty conclusions. Most people come back here eventually.

So take the time you need and we're all here for you when you're ready hunni.

Ps. You're gorgeous !! Xx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"id struggle with the fact someone thought i was only good enough to shag but never good enough to date.. hats off to you folk with friends with benefits..

Its not a case of not good enough just you dont live each other in that way.

I've got people who i love dearly as friends and we shag but we're not in love.

But our of curiosity does this mean youre only looking to date on here ?"

god no.. back when i did meet (not currently) i preferd the one off meets and had my own 'no more than 3 meets' rule..

it was so that i stopped myself from getting attached to people. I havent got that mentallity to cut ties once ive decided i like someone.. so i just became cold

truly was a wham bam done kinda girl

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"id struggle with the fact someone thought i was only good enough to shag but never good enough to date.. hats off to you folk with friends with benefits..

Its not a case of not good enough just you dont live each other in that way.

I've got people who i love dearly as friends and we shag but we're not in love.

But our of curiosity does this mean youre only looking to date on here ?

god no.. back when i did meet (not currently) i preferd the one off meets and had my own 'no more than 3 meets' rule..

it was so that i stopped myself from getting attached to people. I havent got that mentallity to cut ties once ive decided i like someone.. so i just became cold

truly was a wham bam done kinda girl "

Does that make you goid enough to fuck but not good enough to date by your own reasoning?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

Give yourself a little bit of time. Maybe hide your profile and see how you feel in a week or two.

Because you are in pain now it's really hard for you to make the same decision you might make in a few weeks down the line. But you can put off making any choices until this has cleared a little bit for you.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's not a break up though.

Any fwb or fb situation is always with the knowledge that if they meet somone for a relationship its over"

You sure about that...

Its a big assumption....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Xx"
well put together don't let him back in!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tight bastard, not even on WhatsApp with a little

to take the edge off.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *heRealMccoyMan
over a year ago

london

Tomorrow's another day x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's not a break up though.

Any fwb or fb situation is always with the knowledge that if they meet somone for a relationship its over

You sure about that...

Its a big assumption...."
I agree.. after 3 years you would kinda think if they were looking for a relationship the person they have invested 3 years in would be the obvious choice..

Op take time out. Its the same as any break up and you have also lost a friend which makes it hard... x at least if he has met someone outside the lifestyle you won't bump into him

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's not a break up though.

Any fwb or fb situation is always with the knowledge that if they meet somone for a relationship its over

You sure about that...

Its a big assumption...."

Otherwise what youve got is a relationship.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

Xxwell put together don't let him back in!!

Don't see why not?

With My most long term FWB we've broke off shagging between relationships then picked up the sex side again if both single

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's not a break up though.

Any fwb or fb situation is always with the knowledge that if they meet somone for a relationship its over

You sure about that...

Its a big assumption.... I agree.. after 3 years you would kinda think if they were looking for a relationship the person they have invested 3 years in would be the obvious choice..

Op take time out. Its the same as any break up and you have also lost a friend which makes it hard... x at least if he has met someone outside the lifestyle you won't bump into him "

Why would they be the obvious choice.

After being with each other for 3 years and not falling in love it's clear they are not a choice at all.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

"It's not a break up though.

Any fwb or fb situation is always with the knowledge that if they meet somone for a relationship its over

You sure about that...

Its a big assumption.... I agree.. after 3 years you would kinda think if they were looking for a relationship the person they have invested 3 years in would be the obvious choice..

Op take time out. Its the same as any break up and you have also lost a friend which makes it hard... x at least if he has met someone outside the lifestyle you won't bump into him

Why would they be the obvious choice.

After being with each other for 3 years and not falling in love it's clear they are not a choice at all."

I would have thought that logically too thx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's not a break up though.

Any fwb or fb situation is always with the knowledge that if they meet somone for a relationship its over

You sure about that...

Its a big assumption.... I agree.. after 3 years you would kinda think if they were looking for a relationship the person they have invested 3 years in would be the obvious choice..

Op take time out. Its the same as any break up and you have also lost a friend which makes it hard... x at least if he has met someone outside the lifestyle you won't bump into him

Why would they be the obvious choice.

After being with each other for 3 years and not falling in love it's clear they are not a choice at all."
why spend 3 years with someone if you dont want to be with them.. x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's not a break up though.

Any fwb or fb situation is always with the knowledge that if they meet somone for a relationship its over

You sure about that...

Its a big assumption.... I agree.. after 3 years you would kinda think if they were looking for a relationship the person they have invested 3 years in would be the obvious choice..

Op take time out. Its the same as any break up and you have also lost a friend which makes it hard... x at least if he has met someone outside the lifestyle you won't bump into him

Why would they be the obvious choice.

After being with each other for 3 years and not falling in love it's clear they are not a choice at all. why spend 3 years with someone if you dont want to be with them.. x"

Because they're your friend?

Or are you romantically involved with all your friends?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's not a break up though.

Any fwb or fb situation is always with the knowledge that if they meet somone for a relationship its over

You sure about that...

Its a big assumption.... I agree.. after 3 years you would kinda think if they were looking for a relationship the person they have invested 3 years in would be the obvious choice..

Op take time out. Its the same as any break up and you have also lost a friend which makes it hard... x at least if he has met someone outside the lifestyle you won't bump into him

Why would they be the obvious choice.

After being with each other for 3 years and not falling in love it's clear they are not a choice at all. why spend 3 years with someone if you dont want to be with them.. x

Because they're your friend?

Or are you romantically involved with all your friends?"
I've only had one person ive done going out with and meeting regularly... its been a proper relationship for a long time now. So for me i cant see why if you get on that well why it wouldn't naturally progress if you wanted a relationship

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's not a break up though.

Any fwb or fb situation is always with the knowledge that if they meet somone for a relationship its over

You sure about that...

Its a big assumption.... I agree.. after 3 years you would kinda think if they were looking for a relationship the person they have invested 3 years in would be the obvious choice..

Op take time out. Its the same as any break up and you have also lost a friend which makes it hard... x at least if he has met someone outside the lifestyle you won't bump into him

Why would they be the obvious choice.

After being with each other for 3 years and not falling in love it's clear they are not a choice at all. why spend 3 years with someone if you dont want to be with them.. x

Because they're your friend?

Or are you romantically involved with all your friends?I've only had one person ive done going out with and meeting regularly... its been a proper relationship for a long time now. So for me i cant see why if you get on that well why it wouldn't naturally progress if you wanted a relationship "

Simple. Love.

Or you're both looking for differnt things, or youre just incompatible for a full relationship.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *he girl with dreadlocksWoman
over a year ago

need to know basis in Wolverhampton

Xxwell put together don't let him back in!!

Don't see why not?

With My most long term FWB we've broke off shagging between relationships then picked up the sex side again if both single "

If it ended on good terms then yeah for sure.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple

"It's not a break up though.

Any fwb or fb situation is always with the knowledge that if they meet somone for a relationship its over"

Yes...but people still deserve some kindness and respect

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's not a break up though.

Any fwb or fb situation is always with the knowledge that if they meet somone for a relationship its over

You sure about that...

Its a big assumption.... I agree.. after 3 years you would kinda think if they were looking for a relationship the person they have invested 3 years in would be the obvious choice..

Op take time out. Its the same as any break up and you have also lost a friend which makes it hard... x at least if he has met someone outside the lifestyle you won't bump into him

Why would they be the obvious choice.

After being with each other for 3 years and not falling in love it's clear they are not a choice at all. why spend 3 years with someone if you dont want to be with them.. x

Because they're your friend?

Simple. Love.

Or you're both looking for differnt things, or youre just incompatible for a full relationship.

"
if you read the op profile it seems they had moved on.. so I can understand.

I personally couldn't meet and see someone and be intimate with somone I didn't have feelings for.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

People that dump friends for a new relationship were never real friends in my book.

Sounds like he saw it as a fuck buddy thing.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's not a break up though.

Any fwb or fb situation is always with the knowledge that if they meet somone for a relationship its over

You sure about that...

Its a big assumption.... I agree.. after 3 years you would kinda think if they were looking for a relationship the person they have invested 3 years in would be the obvious choice..

Op take time out. Its the same as any break up and you have also lost a friend which makes it hard... x at least if he has met someone outside the lifestyle you won't bump into him

Why would they be the obvious choice.

After being with each other for 3 years and not falling in love it's clear they are not a choice at all. why spend 3 years with someone if you dont want to be with them.. x

Because they're your friend?

Simple. Love.

Or you're both looking for differnt things, or youre just incompatible for a full relationship.

if you read the op profile it seems they had moved on.. so I can understand.

I personally couldn't meet and see someone and be intimate with somone I didn't have feelings for. "

A kind of bizzare _iew point for a site based around sex and intimacy with people you dont have feelings for.

But this is probbaly why youre not suited to fwb.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not getting the friendship elements to these arrangements

You meet up for sex and then go your separate ways until the next one

Long-term bootycall is probably a better term for it

But if the guys been leading her on at any point then I go back to my original post

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure what to do now, wether to carry on swinging, which I do enjoy. Or wether to leave Fab. Or look for a new FWB. XXX"

Iv had the same offer e.g fwb but unlike u it was just the talking stage he was single so he said yea right till I started asking questions then he come out with the bomb shell I would only be his fwb untill he decided to move on or find a relationship yea right on ur bike mate you aint using me till summat else comes along this is my opinion some may disagree stay on the site have a load of fun and stay a single female the guys need us more than we need them on here xxx Kaj

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's not a break up though.

Any fwb or fb situation is always with the knowledge that if they meet somone for a relationship its over

You sure about that...

Its a big assumption.... I agree.. after 3 years you would kinda think if they were looking for a relationship the person they have invested 3 years in would be the obvious choice..

Op take time out. Its the same as any break up and you have also lost a friend which makes it hard... x at least if he has met someone outside the lifestyle you won't bump into him

Why would they be the obvious choice.

After being with each other for 3 years and not falling in love it's clear they are not a choice at all. why spend 3 years with someone if you dont want to be with them.. x

Because they're your friend?

Simple. Love.

Or you're both looking for differnt things, or youre just incompatible for a full relationship.

if you read the op profile it seems they had moved on.. so I can understand.

I personally couldn't meet and see someone and be intimate with somone I didn't have feelings for.

A kind of bizzare _iew point for a site based around sex and intimacy with people you dont have feelings for.

But this is probbaly why youre not suited to fwb.

"
which is why id never have one. And am a group sex and someone who doesn't do intimacy x

But I still think if they had been going out and spending lots of time together that it was a logical conclusion that the fwb with become that. Although heard from some other lady friends that apparently they werent the type of girl that would be dated. Which makes me a little sad that they would think like that

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm not getting the friendship elements to these arrangements

You meet up for sex and then go your separate ways until the next one

Long-term bootycall is probably a better term for it

But if the guys been leading her on at any point then I go back to my original post"

Thats more fuck buddy.

For instance over the years with my fwb I've done the usual, clubbing, dinner, cinema

Birthdays and holidays,

Been to egypt, traveled europe and finland

Attended weddings and outings

Gone to theme parks.

Will be going to italy with another in a few months.

They're my best friends.

Advantage is when we do stuff we dont have to worry about going on the pull lol.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yup probably could of been handled better but we only have one side of the story. Have a break and come back refreshed and have some fun!

Doll x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd take any friendships made revolving around sex with a pinch of salt

It's really easy making friends when sex is on the plate

This

. Once the sex is no longer required, the facade of friendship can fall away pretty quickly.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm not getting the friendship elements to these arrangements

You meet up for sex and then go your separate ways until the next one

Long-term bootycall is probably a better term for it

But if the guys been leading her on at any point then I go back to my original post

Thats more fuck buddy.

For instance over the years with my fwb I've done the usual, clubbing, dinner, cinema

Birthdays and holidays,

Been to egypt, traveled europe and finland

Attended weddings and outings

Gone to theme parks.

Will be going to italy with another in a few months.

They're my best friends.

Advantage is when we do stuff we dont have to worry about going on the pull lol."

Lol... Nah mate

That sounds like the poly shit I read on another thread

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think he was not even a friend really as people who are real friends don't let you down like that ... So you move on there is loads of lovely men out there. xxx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's not a break up though.

Any fwb or fb situation is always with the knowledge that if they meet somone for a relationship its over

Yes...but people still deserve some kindness and respect

"
Maybe he just couldn't face telling you as he probably felt bad cus he new you had feelings for him !!! Us men we always look for the easiest way out of things especially when it comes to letting ppl down and that's probably how he's feeling right now, I bet he feels shit about it, but maybe he's meet someone he feels like he can have a relationship with after 10 days of knowing them, maybe they was friends before who knows, but darlin time to move forward, don't give up on stuff you enjoy you'll soon meet someone new, 1 door closes another opens

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"Sorry to hear that OP, if you enjoy swinging then carry on i say.

On another note, and i'll probably have everyone shout at me for saying this, but surely FWB exceeds being just FWB past a certain point?

If you meet the same person regularly, does it stop being FWB and become an affair?

If feelings and emotions are there then surely no strings attached is no longer possible? And after 3 years he must have had some feelings for the OP, unless he's cold as ice.

Just wondering aloud.

Yeah, I agree with this. Even if there aren't any strong feelings, surely after 3 years, you become friends and there's a degree of comfort there.

Having delt with tears, public break downs and anger on multiple occasions when ending things i honestly think distance is good when ending these "non relationships".

I do wonder though if the FWB ever knew that the op considered it a relationship or if it was only fuck buddies to him.

There are still ways to do it that aren't so impersonal. Although, of it was an open-relationship and the FWB knew that, they've just reached upper level dick status for ending it via KiK...

Tbh i think we're getting so little info that its a bit jumping ro cobclusions.

The text could have said

And then she told him to go fuck himself or blocked him or whatever

I seem to remember more than one similar thread by the OP - not sure if there have been several fwb, if this is the one from the 'open relationship' or if this is a circular occurrence....but I am confused.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry to hear that OP, if you enjoy swinging then carry on i say.

On another note, and i'll probably have everyone shout at me for saying this, but surely FWB exceeds being just FWB past a certain point?

If you meet the same person regularly, does it stop being FWB and become an affair?

If feelings and emotions are there then surely no strings attached is no longer possible? And after 3 years he must have had some feelings for the OP, unless he's cold as ice.

Just wondering aloud.

Yeah, I agree with this. Even if there aren't any strong feelings, surely after 3 years, you become friends and there's a degree of comfort there.

Having delt with tears, public break downs and anger on multiple occasions when ending things i honestly think distance is good when ending these "non relationships".

I do wonder though if the FWB ever knew that the op considered it a relationship or if it was only fuck buddies to him.

There are still ways to do it that aren't so impersonal. Although, of it was an open-relationship and the FWB knew that, they've just reached upper level dick status for ending it via KiK...

Tbh i think we're getting so little info that its a bit jumping ro cobclusions.

The text could have said

And then she told him to go fuck himself or blocked him or whatever

Better memory than me lol

I dont recognise the op in all honesty

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure what to do now, wether to carry on swinging, which I do enjoy. Or wether to leave Fab. Or look for a new FWB. XXX"

You need time to grieve. Give yourself time. Sooner or later yr gonna need a good fucking. When that time comes, you've grieved enough xx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

"A FWB dumped me by text once, that was is the days before KIK.

Has anyone been dumped by semaphore?"
dumped by husband of nine years by skype type...that's got to take some beating.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

do what you gotta do op xx hugs to you..dont leave just dip in and out socially until you feel ready to make a decision based on what you want next xx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

Oh well, onwards and upwards

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry to hear that OP, if you enjoy swinging then carry on i say.

On another note, and i'll probably have everyone shout at me for saying this, but surely FWB exceeds being just FWB past a certain point?

If you meet the same person regularly, does it stop being FWB and become an affair?

If feelings and emotions are there then surely no strings attached is no longer possible? And after 3 years he must have had some feelings for the OP, unless he's cold as ice.

Just wondering aloud.

Yeah, I agree with this. Even if there aren't any strong feelings, surely after 3 years, you become friends and there's a degree of comfort there.

Having delt with tears, public break downs and anger on multiple occasions when ending things i honestly think distance is good when ending these "non relationships".

I do wonder though if the FWB ever knew that the op considered it a relationship or if it was only fuck buddies to him.

There are still ways to do it that aren't so impersonal. Although, of it was an open-relationship and the FWB knew that, they've just reached upper level dick status for ending it via KiK...

Tbh i think we're getting so little info that its a bit jumping ro cobclusions.

The text could have said

And then she told him to go fuck himself or blocked him or whatever

Quite right! We never get the full story on here. However, personally, I'd expect at least a phone call after 3 years. Although, I'm not naive enough to realise that this is how other people think.

I think that might be an age/how you were raised thing.

I hate phone calls much prefer texts as they dont interrupt what im doing and i have time to consider my reply rather than being put on the spot like a phone call.

I think thats the same for a lot of people these days.

If they get used to texting over phones then its just the norm.

Its not seen as less personal tto l text than to ring, but simply less rude and intrusive

Alright, I'm only 4 years older than you!

I wouldn't say a phone call is rude and intrusive. Texting has simply become an easy way of communicating. Emphasis on the easy. "

Agree, and a perfect way out for cowards.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure what to do now, wether to carry on swinging, which I do enjoy. Or wether to leave Fab. Or look for a new FWB. XXX"

This is a horrible situation to be in, and needs time to get over/consider your next move. But I am all for Mae West's dictum that the best way to get over a man is to get under another one.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have you told him that you feeling for him ?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure what to do now, wether to carry on swinging, which I do enjoy. Or wether to leave Fab. Or look for a new FWB. XXX"

Having chatted to you and seen a pic, it shouldn't take you along te to find a new one.... although Advice wise don't get to attached if you can help it!! Xxx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ire_thornMan
over a year ago

no comment

Not sure what to do now, wether to carry on swinging, which I do enjoy. Or wether to leave Fab. Or look for a new FWB. XXX"

What a jerk...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uperhorny69erWoman
over a year ago

NORTHAMPTON

i really feel for you with this as 3 years is along time to see someone on a regular basis & having all those good & fun times with one another but very bad that he didn't feel the need to sit down with you & tell you face to face after all that time & to do it in a text,so so bad,my heart goes out to you & a big hug x,as opposed to you not knowing wether to carry on swinging or staying on the site just do what feels right for you but if you enjoy this lifestyle why stop enjoying yourself,time will be your healer,wishing you well x.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

Just goes to reinforce that even the strongest forthright forum personas can be impacted by rejection. The OP certainly doesn't hold back in her _iews and isn't shy at sticking it to people.

I guess, everyone feels pain and hurt.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"id struggle with the fact someone thought i was only good enough to shag but never good enough to date.. hats off to you folk with friends with benefits..

Its not a case of not good enough just you dont live each other in that way.

I've got people who i love dearly as friends and we shag but we're not in love.

But our of curiosity does this mean youre only looking to date on here ?

I'm same two fab friends I love dearly as friends and happen to shag but wouldn't want more from them than that, nor would they from me.

I don't think many can understand that kind of connection unless they're capable of it "

You don't know *what* you are capable of until you try, or find yourself *in* that position.

I have a few guys I see for more than just one off casual encounters. I enjoy the *getting to know a person* stage, and find friendships CAN be forged here.

In the end it depends on what you are seeking and hoping for!

I can put a lot into my "relationships" & in the past began to get *feels* for a FWB.

When I told him how I felt, he was very sad, and said in hearing the (3 little words) that he HAD to end it and not see me again.

It was clear at that point that I had let my heart rule my head.

And I lost a great guy and lover as a result. :/

Time moved on, and now instead of JUST having ONE FWB,(which can perhaps put way too much pressure on just one person) I have taken to searching for MY ideal situation of finding 3 or 4 super guys who I would want to consider to be my *regular* partners.

Happy days! This means we don't live in each others pockets, but still can enjoy the benefits that come from when you have got past the initial stage of a new partnership to the point that you know what the other person likes!

To the OP...The loss of any relationship hurts. Only time will ease the way you are feeling right now, but it WILL hurt less as time passes.

I wish you all the best. x