FabSwingers.com mobile

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Do you think school ever ends?

Jump to newest
 

By *urvymama OP   Woman
over a year ago

Doncaster

I don't mean In The sense that you never stop having opportunities to learn, I mean more of the school yard mentality. We all know at school there was a division (pardon the terms used I mean no offence) likes the cool kids, the bullies, the sporty kids, the bookworms etc.

I've recently started a new venture and I'm finding the similar division in the working environment (of course I'm the fat kid on the block at the mo) and I've noticed it in previous working environments, these very forums are regularly considered to be a bit of a clique.

So do you think the school yard mentality ever ends?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *appytrailmanMan
over a year ago

Manchester

Personally I don't think the cool kids and geeky kids and all those carry on being that type any more.

The sporty types don't carry on being sporty unless they are very good at it with the exception of Sunday league football.

The ones I believe carry on the playground mentality are the bullies as unfortunately they exisist in all walks of life.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.

I think that in all forms of life there are naturally occurring groups/cliques.

When I started my current role I was surrounded by older white men who had bonded over shared work trips and deals struck and I found it slightly intimidating and cold.

I guess over time you find those you naturally have more in common with? And you should keep on being you regardless of those preexisting groups. You'll find people you get on with.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *urvymama OP   Woman
over a year ago

Doncaster

Oh yes I'm always me regardless

But this is what I mean you find certain people your drawn to and the your seemingly pigeon holed onto that grouping and no one bats an eyelid

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't think it's a playground thing or even inherently immature; it's human nature to form small groups based on shared characteristics or experiences.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You never stop learning but those school days are long gone. I was watching The Breakfast Club and wished l was in school again but retrospect is in 20/20. School was pretty shit at times.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.


"Oh yes I'm always me regardless

But this is what I mean you find certain people your drawn to and the your seemingly pigeon holed onto that grouping and no one bats an eyelid "

Why is that an issue for you? Not in a harsh way but why does it bother you? I guess I'm in a group of old vaguely misogynistic white men but that doesn't make me one.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is in human nature to form groups, so I don't think it never ends. It just shift its form.

I learnt to be a chameleon and adapt myself to any situation I can find myself in.

Humour helps me a lot though.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *urvymama OP   Woman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"Oh yes I'm always me regardless

But this is what I mean you find certain people your drawn to and the your seemingly pigeon holed onto that grouping and no one bats an eyelid

Why is that an issue for you? Not in a harsh way but why does it bother you? I guess I'm in a group of old vaguely misogynistic white men but that doesn't make me one. "

It's not really an issue, I know I started a thread so it makes it seem it , but it's really more of a curiosity

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As others have said - it's purely human nature to form groups.

Having said that, I've always been more been interested in individuals than groups as a whole so have always just done my own thing.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.


"Oh yes I'm always me regardless

But this is what I mean you find certain people your drawn to and the your seemingly pigeon holed onto that grouping and no one bats an eyelid

Why is that an issue for you? Not in a harsh way but why does it bother you? I guess I'm in a group of old vaguely misogynistic white men but that doesn't make me one.

It's not really an issue, I know I started a thread so it makes it seem it , but it's really more of a curiosity

"

Ah okies. It happens. Human nature (as clichéd as that may sound) means we will gravitate towards certain people. I don't really see the pigeonholing in effect though.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Does anyone else notice there's a serious cyclical nature to threads on here? It start with a ton of "who is on your hotlist" threads. Then it moves on to threads focussed on specific body types - which then sometimes morphs into a miasma of "appreciation" threads. Then it concludes with "clique" "playground" and "group-think" threads. Just wondering if anyone else notices the cycle of forum threads? There are others but this one is the most reliable.

I find the way people think en mass to be really interesting and I like noticing patterns. People do form groups and this is true throughout life. I think it's fascinating. Along these lines, some anthropologists have suggested that humans are inherently tribal and that state formation is abnormal for our social patterns. Interesting in any case.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" Interesting in any case."

ZZzzzz...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Does anyone else notice there's a serious cyclical nature to threads on here? It start with a ton of "who is on your hotlist" threads. Then it moves on to threads focussed on specific body types - which then sometimes morphs into a miasma of "appreciation" threads. Then it concludes with "clique" "playground" and "group-think" threads. Just wondering if anyone else notices the cycle of forum threads? There are others but this one is the most reliable.

I find the way people think en mass to be really interesting and I like noticing patterns. People do form groups and this is true throughout life. I think it's fascinating. Along these lines, some anthropologists have suggested that humans are inherently tribal and that state formation is abnormal for our social patterns. Interesting in any case."

l think people underestimate the Tribalism of humanity. We could use it for the better.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Does anyone else notice there's a serious cyclical nature to threads on here? It start with a ton of "who is on your hotlist" threads. Then it moves on to threads focussed on specific body types - which then sometimes morphs into a miasma of "appreciation" threads. Then it concludes with "clique" "playground" and "group-think" threads. Just wondering if anyone else notices the cycle of forum threads? There are others but this one is the most reliable.

I find the way people think en mass to be really interesting and I like noticing patterns. People do form groups and this is true throughout life. I think it's fascinating. Along these lines, some anthropologists have suggested that humans are inherently tribal and that state formation is abnormal for our social patterns. Interesting in any case."

I have noticed patterns in threads usually when I've been off the site for a few weeks.

Before joining in again I have a quick catch up / look through the threads to see who's here,who's left, who's top banana that kind of thing too.

Looking at how threads / ideas / competitions are pushed through into the main spectrum is also fascinating, the recent forum awards being just one example.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *reakShow90Man
over a year ago

Manchester/halifax

I don't think it dose always goner be the cool kids and such just it's a little less in your face as you get older more back biting and sly digs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" Interesting in any case.

ZZzzzz..."

* throws chalk aggressively *

YOU BOY........ WAKE UP !!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think if you're in to that type of thing you seek it out (perhaps unintentionally).

Personally I didn't give a shit about it at school and I don't now.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *urvymama OP   Woman
over a year ago

Doncaster

Sorry I've been away for i while I've been at SW and kettle bells

Been Some interesting responses here i my absence

I do wonder what it is inhuman nature that does make us gravitate towards certain types of people.

I'm inclined to think it could possibly be a fear of loneliness (even if a subconscious one) as we are a social species, but then of course you can be surrounded by loved ones and still feel lonely.

I sometimes think life would be so much easier if we weren't such an emotionally complex species

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ig1gaz1Man
over a year ago

bradford

Its there on most things even on the internet or when out for a drink.

As its there choice I dont tend to bother with it other than to think its there loss not mine.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think people tend to pigeonhole themselves rather than others defining who they are.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't mean In The sense that you never stop having opportunities to learn, I mean more of the school yard mentality. We all know at school there was a division (pardon the terms used I mean no offence) likes the cool kids, the bullies, the sporty kids, the bookworms etc.

I've recently started a new venture and I'm finding the similar division in the working environment (of course I'm the fat kid on the block at the mo) and I've noticed it in previous working environments, these very forums are regularly considered to be a bit of a clique.

So do you think the school yard mentality ever ends? "

School yard mentality never stops, everyone wants to be liked, everyone wants to be funny, everyone thinks their opinion matters more than other peoples. There are the rare few who break these rules, in general though, the mentality stays with us. Unfortunately and we've all either fallen victim of it or done it ourselves, probably without knowing.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's a song about this isn't there?

Bowling for soup - High school never ends.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think people tend to pigeonhole themselves rather than others defining who they are."

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agree with lots of responses here, schoolyard behaviour is a reflection of group dynamics/social identity needs that underly human psychology, adults included. Look up Sherif (1966 etc) Realistic Conflict Theory, the robbers cave experiment is very interesting. Also Tajfel and Turner (1979) Social Identity Theory.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top