FabSwingers.com forum: I think I'm boring...

By *yldstyle OP Woman
over a year ago

A world of my own

Really I do!

I see you all having wild orgies and exciting sex.

I love the thought of it and think yes that's what I want to try.

Then it comes down to it and I get the fear!

Sex still feels like kinda a big deal to me. Don't get me wrong I'm not suggesting its got to lead anywhere its just not as casual a thing to me as it seems to others.

Maybe I'm a prude or boring? Maybe I have too many fantasies that reality can't live up to?

Maybe I just need to have more fun to get over the hurdle that makes it a bit scary?

I'm pretty envious of the exciting times some of you appear to be having. Tell me how lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

no you are just the same as the rest of us , when it comes down to it we are all a tad nervous . some times our fantasies out strip our reality .

just be your glorious self x

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Maybe the 'wild orgies' look good in an ad but really two old men, a nympho and and a virgin male turn up ..... who knows.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"no you are just the same as the rest of us , when it comes down to it we are all a tad nervous . some times our fantasies out strip our reality .

just be your glorious self x"
Well said Taff

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We all get nervous when it comes down to it so don't you feel as though you are alone you're not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I understand. I think I prefer sex to be part of getting to know someone rather than seeing sex as a sport.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're not boring!

I think some people have a tendency to over exaggerate just how good their experiences are, just to save face! Take your time, do things at your own pace and enjoy the journey!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're not alone in the way that you feel. We don't really fit in with swinging as bdsm is more our thing than swinging. In fact we haven't been out or met anyone since Halloween and i don't think that that is going to change anytime soon.

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By *crumdiddlyumptiousMan
over a year ago

Yeah while most of people on fab are talking about it only a handful are actually doing something about it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe you just know what you like and what you don't like? If it's not the same as what others boast about here, does it really matter?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well, I must be boring too. I would much rather find one guy to have lots of sex with than a load of random fucks.

Then maybe we could have fun together.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

First, sex can still be a big deal to you even if it is casual. It's not like you become a living fuck doll when you have casual encounters. That's the one part that didn't read right to me.

That aside, OP, a lot of people will undoubtedly tell the highlights and gloss over the negatives. Or exaggerate.

Lots of people have fantasies that they just try. You don't know it won't live up to reality until you try it.

Just take your time and try not to believe everything you read on here or let it influence your journey.

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By *iver2015Woman
over a year ago

middlesbrough

I feel the same. I feel very sexy and confident one on one but some people seem to ooze sex appeal and could just join in a massive orgy without any reservations. That's just an assumption though xx

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

If you look around sex is a big deal to a lot of people on here. Read between the lines, all the profiles who want "something regular", aren't here to work their way through the site, the people who get upset when someone they arrange to meet for a social cancels for a definite sex meet, those who want intimacy as well as sex...I could go on. Very few of us are genuinely able to separate sex and emotion but the reality is that sex really is just sex when it's casual and means no more than a handshake.

If you don't or can't feel that way there is the possibility that you'll feel bad about yourself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think everyone gets the fear...it's all part of the package..

I also think a lot of people talk the talk but very often they can't walk the walk ..

But obviously you don't know this unless you actually meet them

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By *wiftieeMan
over a year ago

near Glasgow

"Really I do!

I see you all having wild orgies and exciting sex.

I love the thought of it and think yes that's what I want to try.

Then it comes down to it and I get the fear!

Sex still feels like kinda a big deal to me. Don't get me wrong I'm not suggesting its got to lead anywhere its just not as casual a thing to me as it seems to others.

Maybe I'm a prude or boring? Maybe I have too many fantasies that reality can't live up to?

Maybe I just need to have more fun to get over the hurdle that makes it a bit scary?

I'm pretty envious of the exciting times some of you appear to be having. Tell me how lol

But you say that you're not meeting, and have no plans to do so. Hardly inviting!

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By *yldstyle OP Woman
over a year ago

A world of my own

Thank you for all the words of wisdom. There are so many reasons why its complicated for us all.

Our own hang ups and feelings play a big part.

Its good to know I'm not the only one and that others sometimes feel similar xx

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

The second people start to grandstand their sexual conquests for all to see, behave like sex is all that is important in their lives, the more I think bullshit.

Build your confidence up, there is no pressure and do it all at your pace. I think it's all more meaningful then.

Good luck

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"Thank you for all the words of wisdom. There are so many reasons why its complicated for us all.

Our own hang ups and feelings play a big part.

Its good to know I'm not the only one and that others sometimes feel similar xx"

We're all different in so many different ways. The only healthy way to live within this lifestyle, is to do it in your own way, at your own pace and within your own boundaries. Be true to yourself and enjoy whatever you are comfortable with.

Cal

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're not boring OP we're all on here looking for different things but that doesn't mean some of us are boring or less exciting than others. I'm looking for something similar to you, from what you have said, and there are plenty of others too.

Its your fab experience so enjoy it the way that you want to. As others have said people on here often over exaggerate and cut out the bad bits, so take no notice.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Thank you for all the words of wisdom. There are so many reasons why its complicated for us all.

Our own hang ups and feelings play a big part.

Its good to know I'm not the only one and that others sometimes feel similar xx

Cal"

I agree with that. I also feel the more people try to insist they their way is the right way the less secure they are in what they're doing. My mum always says "empty vessels make the most noise".

having said that very few people do that most of us are just carrying on doing what we do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Prior to the swinging scene whenever I was not in a relationship I was having lots of casual sex in the form of one night stands and still do, so the transition to swinging wasn't really that much different.

Casual sex can still be very enjoyable and great fun without it having to be meaningful, works for me. It may not be for everybody but isn't that the case with everything?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel the same. I'm scared to take that first step. Scared of doing wrong. Scared of looking wrong. I want to be abe to do this. But something stopping me.

How do we get over this. Please need a magic wand . Thanks xx

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By *eeBee67Man
over a year ago

Masked and Distant

Everyone has nerves and hangups.

I would love to be as "active" as everyone on here but sadly age, opportunity and confidence get in the way.

Doesnt mean Im boring just normal.

Gorgeous pics

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Please don't believe the tripe people post on here and feel like you're doing something wrong or you're a boring person.

People have lived and died for 1,000 years without experiencing an orgy , mmf , mff , and kink...

Think of swinging as driving a car. Only you can control your journey

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

You aren't boring.

I just say my meets are amazing to make them feel better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm so boring I bore myself stupid

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP I totally get where you're coming from & I've admitted in threads before I sometimes wonder if I'm a boring meet compared to others, as in the big picture I'm not that overly experienced sexually.

But then I think do I really want to participate in the these things other are doing, for example a greedy girl gang bang would do nothing for me whatsoever.

From reading what other people are into has given me ideas that I'd like to play out in the future, ideas though, not a to do list...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP, We are not active anymore, but before my wife's career change we did the club's, parties, and home meets quite a lot. been in an orgy or three think the largest one had about 20 people involved.

Thing is we were both nervous on every occasion, and if we were not then we probably wouldn't have done it at all.

When L is home we mostly just spend time with each other, but occasionally we meet another woman or couple, and we still feel the butterflies when arranging it.

Swinging for us is not about having more sex, it's about having adventures, and not fear, but similar, is a part of that.

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

I'm pretty envious of the exciting times some of you appear to be having. Tell me how lol

If you have had some fun don't worry about it. If you haven't, I'd recommend to at least go and have a little. My health is terrible at the mo so I'm glad to have met some of the most outrageous women in the world - I could not begin to recount my journey.

Prudish or cautious, some of the unexpected openings people bring you are just delicious. Experiencing what your body can do is something else that if you don't experience you will never know exist. Thought it does take practice, patience and openness.

Everybody in the world has sex - in positions probably still to be discovered, just on here, people discuss it more openly.

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

wrong smiley

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