FabSwingers.com forum: timewasters

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi peeps, your views on timewasters? The last few weeks, I've been actively msging, and spoke to some seemingly lovely people, wanting to meet, so I thought, same every single time, I'm busy, kids, fell out a window, parallel universed etc, every excuse you could imagine, whilst still meeting people, I wait, re message, still want to meet, then same again, I've drawn the conclusion, yes we have lives, busy,kids etc, but its always the same, full if promise, full of shit, then ignored, I've five it soz names floating round in.my head, shame because I really wanted to meet some if them, just seems like you get any old excuse, example, your lovely, I wana meet you blah blah, so I try and arrange, busy, another time,but posting stuff like...can't wait for tomorrows meet with Mr x-y blah blah, can these people not see they actually are taking the poss completely? Ruins a bloody good site in my opinion, feel like listing the whole bloody lot on my next post

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Apologies for the type errors Xx

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

How did they waste your time? Time wasters are people who arrange to meet then don't turn up, not people who don't arrange to meet. That's just frustrating.

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Naming and shaming is not permitted so best not make that your next post.

It happens. If people are not interested then move on and don't waste any more of your time on them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I used to make up shit excuses cos my anxiety would take over n I'd Chicken out of a meet. Now I'm activity not meeting I'm much better and if I want to meet I'm more inclined to hold a group social first n then pick someone from there or just message someone I've already meet. I'm satisfying my sexual needs myself atm with a little help from others on Kik. Xxx

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I waste too much time on here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People can genuinely have limited free time or circumstances where they can't meet at the drop of a hat.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can only speak for us. But it does take time to organise something. Mr works f/t and I am doing a f/t college course and working 2 p/t jobs. We then have kids and other home commitments on top of that, so yeah, our lives are pretty hectic.

That said though, if we arrange a meet, we will always show up x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To me that's not a timewaster. A timewaster is someone who arranges a meet, then doesn't show, or let's you down at the last minute. Could be that they don't want to meet you, but rather than come out and say it, they make excuses as to why they can't meet, to try and spare your feelings. Some chat to quite a few men at a time. It's impossible to meet all of them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I waste too much time on here "

Preach

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just because you desparately want to meet them it doesn't mean they necessarily have the time or inclination to meet you OP.

That meet they are talking about for tomorrow may have been planned ages ago. Get over it.

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By *oletiCouple
over a year ago

Doncaster

We have 3 kids hubby works nights and we have limited childcare options so takes a while to plan a meet. Not everyone can meet at the drop of a hat.

Maybe these people arent that interested and just dont know how to say so?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"To me that's not a timewaster. A timewaster is someone who arranges a meet, then doesn't show, or let's you down at the last minute. Could be that they don't want to meet you, but rather than come out and say it, they make excuses as to why they can't meet, to try and spare your feelings. Some chat to quite a few men at a time. It's impossible to meet all of them. "

It would be considered timewasting if men did it to women though. I got called a time waster and blocked for not wanting to meet at 3am.

I admit that I sometimes don't reply as well if l don't find their face attractive but l don't want hurt feelings.

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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago

leeds

If chatting to someone on line is fun then it isn't timewasting even if there is no follow through. If it isn't fun then you are the one wasting your own time. "Timewaster"is a label that is too readily used in my opinion.

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By *andomfodCouple
over a year ago

walsall

I work evenings, N works days and we get about an hour between to hand over our baby and spend time together. Weekends we are off but finding a sitter is a nightmare, so we tend not to arrange stuff, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't be able to get to know people.

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By *ultry SuccubusTV/TS
over a year ago

London

"Time wasters are people who arrange to meet then don't turn up"

That's my definition too.

Plus they didn't have the courtesy to inform that they can't turn up/cancel.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi peeps, your views on timewasters? The last few weeks, I've been actively msging, and spoke to some seemingly lovely people, wanting to meet, so I thought, same every single time, I'm busy, kids, fell out a window, parallel universed etc, every excuse you could imagine, whilst still meeting people, I wait, re message, still want to meet, then same again, I've drawn the conclusion, yes we have lives, busy,kids etc, but its always the same, full if promise, full of shit, then ignored, I've five it soz names floating round in.my head, shame because I really wanted to meet some if them, just seems like you get any old excuse, example, your lovely, I wana meet you blah blah, so I try and arrange, busy, another time,but posting stuff like...can't wait for tomorrows meet with Mr x-y blah blah, can these people not see they actually are taking the poss completely? Ruins a bloody good site in my opinion, feel like listing the whole bloody lot on my next post

We have had very few experiences of timewasters.

Maybe that is due to a positive approach incorporating common sense and not expecting to gel with everyone?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's the whole point of chatting to see IF you want to meet the peeps you are chatting too. Nobody is committed to sex from messaging. It happens to me quite a bit, men get cold feet too and some are just fantasy.

OP it is not a brothel, where you can pick a girl and fk her.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They're only time wasters if they arrange a meet and don't turn up.

I'd probably say you're the one wasting your own time chasing them and then overthinking it. Move on OP and find other women. If the ones you've chatted too are interested , they know where to find you

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

Been here seven years and yet to encounter a time waster. Then again op my definition differs from yours.

Talk to someone at length, conversation dries up/lose interest/better offer...not a time waster.

Get glammed up, arrive at meeting point and they don't show: time waster!

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"They're only time wasters if they arrange a meet and don't turn up.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Expect to chat with more people than you'll meet and that most won't give you a clear 'no thanks' or decline.

Many of us here take months to meet, we're just not usually fast at it. People who sustain an interest in us are worth meeting, as we know they're a good match or desperate - or both

Consider discussion of meet timeframes early on, so you're more clued up.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I'm quite a clever clued up guy I like to think, but I appreciate what you say, when I get approached,messages, saying this and that, telling me would like to meet, I'm courteous, polite, respectful, but I think that's where I go wrong, from then its excuses why can't meet, whilst putting up for meets, and yes I have drove over 40 miles,on request, just to get there and be ignored, not nice at all, my point is, whycsay you want to meet, then pull the excuse book out, but make it obvious, be straight, much more respect for that Xx

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Sometimes OP it takes patience and not being pushy to try and pin someone down to a meet, just because they say they'd like to meet doesn't necessarily mean they want to meet straight away, or anytime soon (could be for any number of reasons).

Perhaps the way to go is carry on chatting to the people concerned, building a rapport and a connection, and not keep pushing for a meet until they are ready to do so. Or as others have said if it seems they're never going to meet, just move on and don't over analyse.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

False promises are part of life on here, best way to be is not to get excited until date, time and place have been arranged.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Timewasters are all those who plan to meet and then cancel it at last minute with all sorts of excuses. Would it not be better to be honest and say that you are here just to fantasize or you are too shy/nervous to meet someone?

To be fair, we all have jobs, kids, family matters, holidays etc, but some nice profiles will remain just nicely written profiles as those behind them have nothing else to show!

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By *asokittyWoman
over a year ago

Nr Worksop

Agree with the fact time wasters are those that don't show up when you've arranged a meet.

Anything else is just chatting even if you say you want to meet until that meet is arranged it's still just chatting.

Like someone else on the thread my anxiety takes over at times, I have physical problems that flare without warning so there have been times I've had to cancel. But it's always with plenty of time and not leaving someone standing. So I don't consider myself a time waster. I imagine in your eyes I am though.

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By *iss_Samantha_LovecockTV/TS
over a year ago

bmth /poole sometimes blandford

i find the best way to deal with them is to block them, then assume everyone that messages you will fuck u about as most of them will.

next , dont make plans .. just do the spontaneous meets thing ..that way youve not wasted hours of your life mailing each other saying what your gonna get up to when u meet

its just a fact of life that sites like fab will be full of bored smartfone fantasy wankers and women that like all the attention.. they will run a mile when they get to actually meet anyone

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So there we have it, can I meet tomorrow? I'm very wanted (explicit message content) , again, tomorrow has come, as in today, the day am I free, not a message all day, not a reply, only sent two so not gone ott, and I feel like the bad one again... This is why I kick off, its not unreasonable to get pissed off surely ? X

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"So there we have it, can I meet tomorrow? I'm very wanted (explicit message content) , again, tomorrow has come, as in today, the day am I free, not a message all day, not a reply, only sent two so not gone ott, and I feel like the bad one again... This is why I kick off, its not unreasonable to get pissed off surely ? X"

If they arrange to meet then go quiet, block them. Don't arrange to meet them again.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi x I've had lots of time for the girl and really enjoyed talking to her, quite a yearn to meet tbh, my chemustrys on fire, and she has said stuff at times I feel she's genuine, perhaps why I don't wanna let go maybe? Really few and far between meets for me tbh with yoy lovely x j

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Chemistry sorry haha x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Really think I ruined it though, she is lovely and seemed very genuine, gutted x

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By *itsAndTaffCouple
over a year ago

Grays, Essex

Sometimes it is s timings thing

We joined the site about a month ago and were inundated with messages it was impossible to meet with everyone who took our eye so we made a list and try and meet a couple of people a week, some guys were outraged they may have to wait 3 weeks so they received s block, impatience won't get them jumped to the front of the queue

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not sure there's a clear definition on what a time waster actually is. If someone is saying they're going to meet and continually dishes out excuses, I'd say they're wasting my time. Although, I'd probably give up suggesting a meet after I'd asked twice.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah me too!!

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By *lowercandyWoman
over a year ago

Lancashire

While I understand the frustration your profile says you've been here 4 mths and you have verifications

There are a LOT of guys on here who would be jumping for joy!!

Speaking personally... yes there are people I want to meet but either

Don't have the time

Don't feel in the right place

Then I may think yes ..

Now I may decide to spend that time with someone who I already know as against the "new meet"

There's so many permiatations...no one knows except the ladies you are talking to

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"Hi x I've had lots of time for the girl and really enjoyed talking to her, quite a yearn to meet tbh, my chemustrys on fire, and she has said stuff at times I feel she's genuine, perhaps why I don't wanna let go maybe? Really few and far between meets for me tbh with yoy lovely x j"

If she's going quiet on you, she's not interested. Leave it.

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By *ohnlauraCouple
over a year ago

wirral

We don't send facial photos or cam because we like to be discrete,we get loads of interesting looking replies which used to take a lot of time sorting through many of which lead to nothing so the method that we find most usefull to sort out the phonies is to ask the guy to send a photo of themselves tributing our photos,hey presto 80% don't get back to you but 75%of those that do result in a meet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 04/01/17 23:03:39]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i find the best way to deal with them is to block them, then assume everyone that messages you will fuck u about as most of them will.

next , dont make plans .. just do the spontaneous meets thing ..that way youve not wasted hours of your life mailing each other saying what your gonna get up to when u meet

its just a fact of life that sites like fab will be full of bored smartfone fantasy wankers and women that like all the attention.. they will run a mile when they get to actually meet anyone "

Excellent post ... you're very wise

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks mate, I must be wise, last few messages ignored, now blocked, I knew it, could just tell, "what about tomorrow?" Was gonna say Tuesday but you're being funny' "I'm on my period" whilst putting up for sex... Took me for a right twat, looks like I was right Hey , thanks a fucking bunch

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It happens to all of us. Not nice but you have to move on. I've become very harsh this time and I don't chase anymore like I use too.

There are some lovely people on here you just have to find them.

Don't they give up OP.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks flossy Xx you are right, people like that really taint it for the more genuine straight up ppl, then you end up tarring with the same brush, others think you mean them when you let off, and causes just ill feeling all round Xx northampton ain't too far for me though lovely

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Oh and it gets better, a girl said yesterday, she wanted to meet tonight, and appreciates what happened, not a timewaster etc, said four times yesterday, definite, don't worry, were good, so I went on to cancel a shift. And get a sitter like I said, today now its, can we do Monday or Tuesday, I say about the sitter, work etc, and get deleted, thankyou very much, what is wrong with some fucking people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh and it gets better, a girl said yesterday, she wanted to meet tonight, and appreciates what happened, not a timewaster etc, said four times yesterday, definite, don't worry, were good, so I went on to cancel a shift. And get a sitter like I said, today now its, can we do Monday or Tuesday, I say about the sitter, work etc, and get deleted, thankyou very much, what is wrong with some fucking people

I think most people work out very quickly to not make plans around the people on here.

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