FabSwingers.com forum: Swingers out, loud and proud?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So today at work there were customers who were quite loudly and openly talking about fabswingers and their experiences at swinging clubs. Even whilst I was at there table taking the card payment.

It made feel a little awkward because I was worried I'd subconsciously react and give my secret away

So how many of you are out and proud and who plays the innocent?

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

We don't hide the fact

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe they recognised you? Dropping hints?

Some people don't know the meaning of discretion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dont hide it, but respect that some people do (in other words if we met in a bar I wouldn't make you wear a badge)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Innocent here, although Mrs does have friends who are aware of we've been up to but not exact details.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So today at work there were customers who were quite loudly and openly talking about fabswingers and their experiences at swinging clubs. Even whilst I was at there table taking the card payment.

It made feel a little awkward because I was worried I'd subconsciously react and give my secret away

So how many of you are out and proud and who plays the innocent?"

It was a trap, someone recognised you!...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Maybe they recognised you? Dropping hints?

Some people don't know the meaning of discretion "

Agreed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My close circle know what I'm about, but I don't shout it from the rooftops.

I'm not bothered about people finding out, but I don't want anything being mentioned around or to my children so ill only keep stuff from the bigmouth people who pounce on gossip, and don't care where they spread it.

Other than that I'm an open book

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutely no one knows that I even have an interest in swinging, let alone that I'm on here. I like to keep my private life private. It adds to the excitement of it all...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My family know and some friends, it's certainly not a secret in my house and have frank and candid conversations on a semi regular basis. Beyond that no, it's not anyone else's business what I get up to and certainly can't be bothered fielding questions or judgement in the work place.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So today at work there were customers who were quite loudly and openly talking about fabswingers and their experiences at swinging clubs. Even whilst I was at there table taking the card payment.

It made feel a little awkward because I was worried I'd subconsciously react and give my secret away

So how many of you are out and proud and who plays the innocent?"

That's a close call considering your face is on here

but yeah, noone except you lovely folk know I'm on here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Absolutely no one knows that I even have an interest in swinging, let alone that I'm on here. I like to keep my private life private. It adds to the excitement of it all...

We love it being our naughty little secret!

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Nope it's only known to us and anyone within the swinging world whose paths we may have crossed.

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By *nmgCouple
over a year ago

Liverpool

Sweet and innocent here. We're actually still virgins....

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By *at69driveMan
over a year ago

Hertford

"So today at work there were customers who were quite loudly and openly talking about fabswingers and their experiences at swinging clubs. Even whilst I was at there table taking the card payment.

It made feel a little awkward because I was worried I'd subconsciously react and give my secret away

So how many of you are out and proud and who plays the innocent?"
My private life is exactly that. What possible interest would it be to anyone else what I get up to. ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"So today at work there were customers who were quite loudly and openly talking about fabswingers and their experiences at swinging clubs. Even whilst I was at there table taking the card payment.

It made feel a little awkward because I was worried I'd subconsciously react and give my secret away

So how many of you are out and proud and who plays the innocent?

That's a close call considering your face is on here

but yeah, noone except you lovely folk know I'm on here

Good point

face hidden

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So today at work there were customers who were quite loudly and openly talking about fabswingers and their experiences at swinging clubs. Even whilst I was at there table taking the card payment.

It made feel a little awkward because I was worried I'd subconsciously react and give my secret away

So how many of you are out and proud and who plays the innocent?

That's a close call considering your face is on here

but yeah, noone except you lovely folk know I'm on here

Good point

face hidden

Gutted

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Absolutely no one knows that I even have an interest in swinging, let alone that I'm on here. I like to keep my private life private. It adds to the excitement of it all...

We love it being our naughty little secret! "

The only bit I don't like is lying to my friends about why I won't be around..

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By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed

Very few actually know what we do.

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By *rs mischiefWoman
over a year ago

Manchester

keeping it innocent

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I keep it quiet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So today at work there were customers who were quite loudly and openly talking about fabswingers and their experiences at swinging clubs. Even whilst I was at there table taking the card payment.

It made feel a little awkward because I was worried I'd subconsciously react and give my secret away

So how many of you are out and proud and who plays the innocent?

That's a close call considering your face is on here

but yeah, noone except you lovely folk know I'm on here

Good point

face hidden

Gutted"

Oh bollocks! I'm with Pauly here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Camp innocent here. I like it that way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One or 2 friends know I'm on here, but I keep my private life private usually

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Only 1 person knows and I want it kept that way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would suggest people keep their swinging life separate from their vanilla life......

I have seen friends and family initially except people swinging.... then later on in life use swinging against that same person to their advantage... such as divorce , child custody , and work

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would suggest people keep their swinging life separate from their vanilla life......

I have seen friends and family initially except people swinging.... then later on in life use swinging against that same person to their advantage... such as divorce , child custody , and work"

Good point

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By *iSTARessWoman
over a year ago

London

Super out, everyone knows. I think positively talking about it takes the stigma out of it.

Perfectly respect those who don't have the same freedom

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Super out, everyone knows. I think positively talking about it takes the stigma out of it.

Perfectly respect those who don't have the same freedom "

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"Super out, everyone knows. I think positively talking about it takes the stigma out of it.

Perfectly respect those who don't have the same freedom "

I'm retired, my children are adults, I have enough money to not work again and own my home, therefore I have nothing to lose if I wanted to discuss my lifestyle.

I choose not to discuss my private life with all and sundry because it's "private". I accept some people are not discreet and think everyone is interested in everything they do/aim to shock, but citing freedom...Please!

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Super out, everyone knows. I think positively talking about it takes the stigma out of it.

Perfectly respect those who don't have the same freedom "

Freedom also covers the choice not to inform people about my sex life.

I would argue that talking about swinging will only titillate many people. I'm often surprised how many swingers attach stigma to other swingers activities too.

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

I'd mainly be worried about the kids at school finding out.

Cal

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd mainly be worried about the kids at school finding out.

Cal"

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By *iSTARessWoman
over a year ago

London

"Super out, everyone knows. I think positively talking about it takes the stigma out of it.

Perfectly respect those who don't have the same freedom

I'm retired, my children are adults, I have enough money to not work again and own my home, therefore I have nothing to lose if I wanted to discuss my lifestyle.

Funny. I've no interest in shock value or attention, I get enough of that from my jobs. I'm privileged to be in a position not have to worry about others, I call that a freedom. I respect your right to remain private, is it so wrong that I'm not?

It's not like I introduce myself down the pub as a swinger or tell folk intimate details. I'm no sexpert but I've been open about sex, sexuality and BDSM my whole adult life and hosted workshops too. It's rewarding when folk tell me I've helped enhance their sex life or attitude to sex.

This country is still incredibly inhibited about talking openly about sex positively. The more people are open, better education, better sex for everyone, less stigma, less shaming.

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By *iSTARessWoman
over a year ago

London

"Super out, everyone knows. I think positively talking about it takes the stigma out of it.

Perfectly respect those who don't have the same freedom

Freedom also covers the choice not to inform people about my sex life.

I would argue that talking about swinging will only titillate many people. I'm often surprised how many swingers attach stigma to other swingers activities too."

Absolutely, that freedom goes both ways. As above, zero interest in titillating. When someone asks me, I'm frank and honest rather than salacious. Takes the giggle factor out of the subject.

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By *onny MCMan
over a year ago

Crawley

No one knows except the friends I've bumped into on Fabs, lol.

Got photoed by The Sun at Swingfields and nobody spotted me, think I can get away with it for a little longer. Work wouldn't care, there's far worse goes on here. Mum would go overboard but even she'd calm down eventually. I'm not massively worried about being outed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Super out, everyone knows. I think positively talking about it takes the stigma out of it.

Perfectly respect those who don't have the same freedom "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Super out, everyone knows. I think positively talking about it takes the stigma out of it.

Perfectly respect those who don't have the same freedom

I'm retired, my children are adults, I have enough money to not work again and own my home, therefore I have nothing to lose if I wanted to discuss my lifestyle.

This is a little harsh. While there's respect for the choice to not be open about swinging, there's absolutely nothing wrong if others want to be open about it. I'm not really sure why you think it's so wrong.

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

For me I have a few friends that know

Mainly as I told them a few years ago.....but they weren't surprised

To my close uni mates I was known as cockney perv so they weren't suppressed and they can't complain as 2 of them are nearly as bad

A few football lads know because someone else on here outed me. TBH a few lads were a bit funny at first but we talked and they were like so you shagged 2 women at same time.....

Other than that I have a number of friends that are ex swingers that I have played with or seen me naked so they know.

One girl from school knows but she was in a club at same time

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By *exmanMan
over a year ago

Stainforth

I'm open about being a swinger although I do know it's very important to respect those who are not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a good topic of discussion this.

For me personally I keep this section of my life private. No one at all knows (other than those who I've met/confided in through her and other sites).

I think for me personally, this discretion comes from my work online as a webcam model and the consequences of me being "caught" or outed in my last "day job". I took huge risks to work online, and in many cases, still do.

I liken this to my swinging activities too. They are for me and those that I choose to include only.

I have a lot of respect for those that are able to speak freely about it.

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By *abat40xWoman
over a year ago

North Lincolnshire

I keep this side of my life very private that's why no face pics on my profile. It adds a little more fun when your out and about and bump into people you've seen on fab xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not sure innocent is quite the right word

but only one other person knows i'm on here (I met him through another site.)

This side of my life is private, occasionally i discuss sex with my friends but it's pretty generic when we do.

Sometimes I'd think for the pure shock factor alone I'd love to say something, maybe one day!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its a funny thing, there is one person that I don't want to know I'm into bdsm, and that's an old school pal, who is also into bdsm, the problem is that he keeps posting stuff about bdsm on Facebook, and I don't feel like I can trust him to not tag me in stuff that he's posting.

He's a good lad, but he's very new to bdsm, and I think he just gets a bit over zealous with his new found activities.

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By *arlee72Couple
over a year ago

Ewell

A few fiends/work colleagues have an idea. We never deny it but neither confirm what we get up to. Leaves them guessing and gossiping which adds to the intrigue on their part but none of them have the balls to ask directly!

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"Super out, everyone knows. I think positively talking about it takes the stigma out of it.

Perfectly respect those who don't have the same freedom

I'm retired, my children are adults, I have enough money to not work again and own my home, therefore I have nothing to lose if I wanted to discuss my lifestyle.

I don't think it's wrong at all!

What irks me is the connotation from *some* that not discussing your sex life equates to shame/lack of freedom etc.

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By *evaquitCouple
over a year ago

Catthorpe

Innocent. Certain forumites know why.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Super out, everyone knows. I think positively talking about it takes the stigma out of it.

Perfectly respect those who don't have the same freedom

I'm retired, my children are adults, I have enough money to not work again and own my home, therefore I have nothing to lose if I wanted to discuss my lifestyle.

I don't think it's wrong at all!

What irks me is the connotation from *some* that not discussing your sex life equates to shame/lack of freedom etc.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

there's some very stupid people that think anyone else gives a shit about their sex lives

and they tell everyone who they fucked with no thought for other peoples privacy or lives

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"there's some very stupid people that think anyone else gives a shit about their sex lives

and they tell everyone who they fucked with no thought for other peoples privacy or lives"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Super out, everyone knows. I think positively talking about it takes the stigma out of it.

Perfectly respect those who don't have the same freedom

I'm retired, my children are adults, I have enough money to not work again and own my home, therefore I have nothing to lose if I wanted to discuss my lifestyle.

I don't think it's wrong at all!

What irks me is the connotation from *some* that not discussing your sex life equates to shame/lack of freedom etc.

It was more...

"I accept some people are not discreet and think everyone is interested in everything they do"

I don't think It was meant that not talking about your sex life equates to lack of freedom or shame, its more choice. However, for some, it is the former.

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

I have one friend who knows.

I'm not going to shout about the fact I'm here, work would be shocked

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have one friend who knows.

I'm not going to shout about the fact I'm here, work would be shocked

Nevermind work; what would the ladies in your chapter of the WI say?

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

"I have one friend who knows.

I'm not going to shout about the fact I'm here, work would be shocked

Nevermind work; what would the ladies in your chapter of the WI say?

Personally I think June would benefit from a good dicking

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always play that I'm sweet and innocent

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Our little secret and determined it stays that

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

The important people in my life know, some don't approve at all, (I accept and expect that) some don't approve but just tell me to be careful, others find it exciting and intriguing (a female friend as just joined for that reason) and others take the non judgemental approach of saying I wouldn't have the confidence to do it but good for you, enjoy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Many people on here haven't told their wives/husbands they are on here, let alone the wider world!

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By *iSTARessWoman
over a year ago

London

"Super out, everyone knows. I think positively talking about it takes the stigma out of it.

Perfectly respect those who don't have the same freedom

I'm retired, my children are adults, I have enough money to not work again and own my home, therefore I have nothing to lose if I wanted to discuss my lifestyle.

I don't think it's wrong at all!

What irks me is the connotation from *some* that not discussing your sex life equates to shame/lack of freedom etc.

Not my intention at all

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By *iSTARessWoman
over a year ago

London

"Super out, everyone knows. I think positively talking about it takes the stigma out of it.

Perfectly respect those who don't have the same freedom

I'm retired, my children are adults, I have enough money to not work again and own my home, therefore I have nothing to lose if I wanted to discuss my lifestyle.

I don't think it's wrong at all!

What irks me is the connotation from *some* that not discussing your sex life equates to shame/lack of freedom etc.

It was more...

"I accept some people are not discreet and think everyone is interested in everything they do"

I don't think It was meant that not talking about your sex life equates to lack of freedom or shame, its more choice. However, for some, it is the former. "

Exactly.

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By *lactontogMan
over a year ago

Clacton on Sea

Everybody who knows us know what we do as its a little town, people don't take any notice & life carries on quite normal.

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By *onny MCMan
over a year ago

Crawley

"I'm not sure innocent is quite the right word

but only one other person knows i'm on here (I met him through another site.)

This side of my life is private, occasionally i discuss sex with my friends but it's pretty generic when we do.

Sometimes I'd think for the pure shock factor alone I'd love to say something, maybe one day!"

Yeah, there's this idiot at work who's made plenty of jokes suggesting I've not gotten laid since my last relationship ended 3 or 4 years ago. Be funny one day to let him know how much sex I actually get. He's married with 2 young kids so it's probably more than he does. it'd probably get our shift's boring old God-botherer to stop talking to me as well.

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