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Horrendous work courses.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Yesterday I had to partake in a particularly horrendous course for work. I was strapped into a metal box, submerged in cold water in pitch black and spun upside down to learn to escape. Several times.

So what is the worst work based course you have had to do?

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

I had to get up tomorrow, at ten past midnight in the morning and walk 3 miles in the rain, eating nothing but a lump of coal.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've just finished doing 17th Edition, Building Regs and Part P - the most boring 3 weeks of my life, but worth it for the qualification.

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

I've said this before but...

They once had us do a 2-day workshop on Diversity that was the most staggering waste of time and money, a truly tedious, worthy box-ticking exercise.

Anyway, they had a Speaking Stone, and as the discussion went around the room you could only speak when holding the Stone. One of those.

So at the end of day 2 we had to go round the circle and say, "Hi, I'm Bob and I'm 50% more diverse than I was yesterday," or whatever...

And I was the penultimate one in the circle. So when the Stone got to me I said:

"Hi, my name's [Joe], I'm an alcoholic. It's been 12 hours since my last drink and I think I might be in the wrong session."

There was uproar.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am fully qualified to administer rectal diazepam in the case of a severe epileptic seizure.

The course was quite horrendous as we had to practise on a plastic arse. Thank Christ we didn't have to practice on each other!!

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville


"I've said this before but...

They once had us do a 2-day workshop on Diversity that was the most staggering waste of time and money, a truly tedious, worthy box-ticking exercise.

Anyway, they had a Speaking Stone, and as the discussion went around the room you could only speak when holding the Stone. One of those.

So at the end of day 2 we had to go round the circle and say, "Hi, I'm Bob and I'm 50% more diverse than I was yesterday," or whatever...

And I was the penultimate one in the circle. So when the Stone got to me I said:

"Hi, my name's [Joe], I'm an alcoholic. It's been 12 hours since my last drink and I think I might be in the wrong session."

There was uproar.

"

And somebody got paid for picking up that rock outside that classroom!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I've said this before but...

They once had us do a 2-day workshop on Diversity that was the most staggering waste of time and money, a truly tedious, worthy box-ticking exercise.

Anyway, they had a Speaking Stone, and as the discussion went around the room you could only speak when holding the Stone. One of those.

So at the end of day 2 we had to go round the circle and say, "Hi, I'm Bob and I'm 50% more diverse than I was yesterday," or whatever...

And I was the penultimate one in the circle. So when the Stone got to me I said:

"Hi, my name's [Joe], I'm an alcoholic. It's been 12 hours since my last drink and I think I might be in the wrong session."

There was uproar.

"

I did one of those. At the start of the session we all had to introduce ourselves and have an interesting facts about ourselves...going round the room the interesting facts included

'I like pizza'

'I like sleeping'

Face meet palm, palm meet face. Fuck this is going to be a long couple of days

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

A couple of years ago I also did a highly technical course and the instructor stood up on the Monday morning and said -'I don't care if the IT goes down, I can talk about this for a week' and he did. He set an alarm on his phone for 1 hour 15 mins and went on transmit for that time..5 min break and same again (this was 20 mins longer than most bladders are comfortable with...so I could only thinknow about going for a pee!)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

5 days detox acupuncture course in a freezing cold cottage in the middle of nowhere where with several new age type people (trying to be more pc than hippy) where one brought his own urine in a bottle to drink at tea break

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yesterday I had to partake in a particularly horrendous course for work. I was strapped into a metal box, submerged in cold water in pitch black and spun upside down to learn to escape. Several times.

So what is the worst work based course you have had to do?"

But did you learn the 2 key points from the course?

point 1, move boxes away from water before working on them.

point 2, make the box from the outside.

sub point for trainers, always think outside the box

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By *unandbuckCouple
over a year ago

Sheffield


"Yesterday I had to partake in a particularly horrendous course for work. I was strapped into a metal box, submerged in cold water in pitch black and spun upside down to learn to escape. Several times.

So what is the worst work based course you have had to do?"

That's a bit much, since you work in accounts in Debenhams.

Are you sure there wasn't more behind this 'training' ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think the worst was a close call between diversity and team inspiration.

the best was moving a dummy supposedly an injured person cross country over a river down a cliff etc. especially as at 5pm we left the stretcher and dummy in the woods and went to spend the evening in a 5 star hotel. Never was quite sure how it enabled us to perform our router coding better, but it was fun

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"5 days detox acupuncture course in a freezing cold cottage in the middle of nowhere where with several new age type people (trying to be more pc than hippy) where one brought his own urine in a bottle to drink at tea break "

Sounds....delightful

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"Yesterday I had to partake in a particularly horrendous course for work. I was strapped into a metal box, submerged in cold water in pitch black and spun upside down to learn to escape. Several times.

So what is the worst work based course you have had to do?"

Oh God I went on a weekend 'headfuck' in a country mansion, where we had to work all night on an impossible brief and present in the morning, whereupon they skewed all the results to mess with our heads even more.

On the way home I made the decision to leave London...........

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I once went to a union meeting where there was some unrest in the ranks. Two facilitators were brought in to run the discussion! and before you spoke, you had to "check in" then once you had said all you had to say you had to "check out"

I was reprimanded for saying in my best bo selecta Craig David impression "cchheckin art"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have clearly been on all the wrong courses!

I once went on a course in a plush Welsh Hotel and saw Warren Gatland and a few welsh rugby players in the lobby. I think they were Rugby Players, they had shorts on.

That's as exciting as that course got.

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