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if i had a £1 for.......

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By *eeside OP   Man
over a year ago

margate sumwear by the sea

Evey time sumone took the piss over sumthing about me I wood be a moltiy millionaire....

Wot wood make you a moltiy millionaire if you had a £1 for sumthing that happons ???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Every time people act surprised about my surname. Obviously can't say it here but they make a comment as if it's the first time I've ever heard it

Kinky

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everytime I forge.....oh hang on what was I replying to? xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Every time I cried. I'm just so damn sensitive!

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By *edonistic ExplorersCouple
over a year ago

Stratford

If I had a £1 for every time someone cut me up on the A14 I'd be very rich On another note will someone else please ask BMW to fit indicators as standard rather than being an optional extra? They've ignored my pleas...

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By *rightonfranceMan
over a year ago

brighton - chalais france

if I had a £1 for every thing that skips a spellchecker on here I'd be a molty (Multi) millionaire lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"if I had a £1 for every thing that skips a spellchecker on here I'd be a molty (Multi) millionaire lol"

He's dyslexic

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.

Every time I rolled my eyes or sighed in exasperation would make me wealthier.

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By *iffraffMan
over a year ago

Gloucester

I'm a painter. £1 for every time a customer says your supposed to get it on the wall, not on you ....... Yes I'd retire !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 25/11/16 18:40:06]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A pound for every time we've overheard someone saying 'I wonder how they manage sex'

With Mrs being short n skinny and me being tall n fat.

I usually take great glee in informing them that we do it the same way they do, only better.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

£1 for every time I got distracted by boobies, bums and cocks on fab.

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By *im le2Man
over a year ago

AYLESTONE

I stared wanking age 12 Work it out im now aged 61 and still enjoy it at least twice a day .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For every time I pretend I don't know what "WUU2" means.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Every time Norwich lost a match

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By *horltzMan
over a year ago

heysham

Every time I had a message

I would have a pound

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If I had a £1 for every time someone cut me up on the A14 I'd be very rich On another note will someone else please ask BMW to fit indicators as standard rather than being an optional extra? They've ignored my pleas..."

If have been a millionaire in my first 2 years of driving down the A14, especially near Cambridge. Unfortunately 18 years later I'm still not

If I had a pound for every time people spelt out surname incorrectly we'd also be millionaires

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

If I had a pound for every gay man who asked me to fuck him bb... I'd probably have the downpayment on AIDS meds

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"Evey time sumone took the piss over sumthing about me I wood be a moltiy millionaire....

Wot wood make you a moltiy millionaire if you had a £1 for sumthing that happons ??? "

I remember when you first joined and people took the piss. You didn't react. "Here's a stayer" I thought and here you are.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Commented on my lips and what they think the really reason I have them x

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By *eeside OP   Man
over a year ago

margate sumwear by the sea


"Evey time sumone took the piss over sumthing about me I wood be a moltiy millionaire....

Wot wood make you a moltiy millionaire if you had a £1 for sumthing that happons ???

I remember when you first joined and people took the piss. You didn't react. "Here's a stayer" I thought and here you are.

"

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By *ollyGWoman
over a year ago

Southampton


"Every time people act surprised about my surname. Obviously can't say it here but they make a comment as if it's the first time I've ever heard it

Kinky "

Can't be as bad as mine? GREENTREE lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Every time I didn't get a reply on this site! Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Every time someone off here says they wanna meet but don't

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

...every time I am called 'Mum', I would be a squillionaire

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Evey time sumone took the piss over sumthing about me I wood be a moltiy millionaire....

Wot wood make you a moltiy millionaire if you had a £1 for sumthing that happons ??? "

Bad spelling ??

I've made £10 just from OP's post already

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By *ficouldMan
over a year ago

a quandary, could you change my mind?

Every time someone said 'can you just'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Every time I'm called by the wrong name! I'm a twin and my last name is a common girls name, so it happens regularly!

Then I might actually be able to pay my student loans!

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By *ecretlyASoftieWoman
over a year ago

Hull but travel regularly

Every time my mother gets my name wrong. She goes round the houses and calls me by my sisters, nieces and other people's name before she'll finally get to mine. I now refer to myself as 'whoever you are' or 'that one who turns up now and again'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everytime someone spells my name wrong.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For everytime I masturbated.

Brb, I'm off to earn some hard cash.

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By *ex LutherMan
over a year ago

Closer than you think


"Everytime I forge.....oh hang on what was I replying to? xxx"

You're a forgerer!!

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By *im le2Man
over a year ago

AYLESTONE

A pound for every pint of Newcastle brown I've drank.

Would give me another three pints a night . Times that by 45years . 45x365x3 bloody hell im pissed just on the free ones.

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Every time someone asked if I'm really dirty!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For every time I get slagged for me accent.here 14 years and even the patients slag me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If i had a pound for everyone that mailed mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm gawd i hate it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Every time someone asked if I'm really dirty! "

In my case, if I'm really innocent

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Farting.

When you're a vegetarian who has their arse fucked regularly you fart. Lots

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...


"Farting.

When you're a vegetarian who has their arse fucked regularly you fart. Lots "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"if I had a £1 for every thing that skips a spellchecker on here I'd be a molty (Multi) millionaire lol"

Wow, you are quite the twat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I had a £1 for everytime my kids told me they couldn't find something. They've got the man look down to a t

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"if I had a £1 for every thing that skips a spellchecker on here I'd be a molty (Multi) millionaire lol

He's dyslexic "

Every time someone claims to be dyslexic because they don't proof read their post before hitting "post message"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everytime someone told me 'I've never done such a thing before with anyone"

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By *layfulCouple86Couple
over a year ago

Lancashire


"A pound for every time we've overheard someone saying 'I wonder how they manage sex'

With Mrs being short n skinny and me being tall n fat.

I usually take great glee in informing them that we do it the same way they do, only better. "

We get that a lot as well

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By *yldstyleWoman
over a year ago

A world of my own

For every time someone points out I started young (with having children)

Or for every time they wrongly assume they have different dads

And for the look on their faces when I tell them I was married.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I had a pound for every message I've sent on here and got no reply I'd be out buying a Ferrari

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Every time people act surprised about my surname. Obviously can't say it here but they make a comment as if it's the first time I've ever heard it

Kinky "
. I'm very intrigued now (Kat) xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Every time someone posts a bitchy comment regarding someone's spelling on the forums

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By *yldstyleWoman
over a year ago

A world of my own


"Every time someone posts a bitchy comment regarding someone's spelling on the forums "

Or mentions popcorn!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"if I had a £1 for every thing that skips a spellchecker on here I'd be a molty (Multi) millionaire lol

Wow, you are quite the twat "
Agree xx

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury


"Everytime someone told me 'I've never done such a thing before with anyone" "

Yes, a few men say that to me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Every time someone posts a bitchy comment regarding someone's spelling on the forums

Or mentions popcorn!"

Or cake

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everytoime I spotted bad grammer.

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

If I had £1 for every £1 I have, I'd have the same amount of money.

Ha! Impeccable logic

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By *uthTVDerbysTV/TS
over a year ago

Derby

If I had a £ for every time somebody made fun of my terrible numerical ability ... I'd have £4.83.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Or every time I upset someone with honesty.

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Every mile I travel for work

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury


"Every time someone asked if I'm really dirty! "

Have you had a bath recently..?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For every time my first name is spelt wrong. I know it's not a common one, but 80% misspell it.

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury


"Every time people act surprised about my surname. Obviously can't say it here but they make a comment as if it's the first time I've ever heard it

Kinky . I'm very intrigued now (Kat) xx"

Should try my surname. I enjoy watching people flail about trying to pronounce it before telling them it's pronounced "Smith" (which it clearly isn't) or just saying "Mr Unpronounceable will do."

Once in a generation some says it correctly and gives me a nice surprise

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"For every time my first name is spelt wrong. I know it's not a common one, but 80% misspell it. "

Yep, or they mispronounce my surname too. The postman who delivers our mail to work and needs special delivery signed for has spelt my surname in numerous ways

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

Am I really 6ft??? No I'm lying I'm really 5ft 3

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I had a £1 everytime I got asked if I was Miranda Hart I'd have at least £5

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By *imjohnCouple
over a year ago

Clacton on sea, Essex


"Evey time sumone took the piss over sumthing about me I wood be a moltiy millionaire....

Wot wood make you a moltiy millionaire if you had a £1 for sumthing that happons ??? "

If we had a £1 every time someone pirated one of our films we would be millionaires many times over lol.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

For every time someone asked me if my hair is real or extensions. Rude!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"For every time someone asked me if my hair is real or extensions. Rude!"

*deletes message I was just about to send*

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh


"Am I really 6ft??? No I'm lying I'm really 5ft 3 "

Weirdly I noticed that on your profile yesterday and thought you're how tall?! Not my mental picture at all and now I can't work out if you're really 5ft3 after all!

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"For every time someone asked me if my hair is real or extensions. Rude!

*deletes message I was just about to send* "

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum


"Am I really 6ft??? No I'm lying I'm really 5ft 3

Weirdly I noticed that on your profile yesterday and thought you're how tall?! Not my mental picture at all and now I can't work out if you're really 5ft3 after all! "

She's taller than me, and I'm tall

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Every message sent that I've not received a reply from

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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago

Filthy Fuckeryville

For everytime I am asked in a club or at a social if I am Hanky.

I then ask them if the hair gave it away.....

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By *ngel n tedCouple
over a year ago

maidstone

People mispronounce our second name all the time, it aint hard to pronounce, in fact it's pronounced the same as an everday word with a different letter at the start. Yet for some reason folk think the letter changes the whole pronunciation, it really doesn't....ya cunts.

Angel had a bit of a problematic surname before we married, she thought she'd be ok with her new surname......lol!

My 10 year old son has started noticing people doing it now, he mentioned it to me the other week. I said "yep, you've got a lifetime of that to come matey".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Every time someone posts a bitchy comment regarding someone's spelling on the forums "

Unnecessary apostrophe there! Tut tut..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Every time someone posts a bitchy comment regarding someone's spelling on the forums

Unnecessary apostrophe there! Tut tut..

"

Nope, I was correct

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"People mispronounce our second name all the time, it aint hard to pronounce, in fact it's pronounced the same as an everday word with a different letter at the start. Yet for some reason folk think the letter changes the whole pronunciation, it really doesn't....ya cunts.

Angel had a bit of a problematic surname before we married, she thought she'd be ok with her new surname......lol!

My 10 year old son has started noticing people doing it now, he mentioned it to me the other week. I said "yep, you've got a lifetime of that to come matey"."

Our surname has a lot of consonants in it. If we had £1 for every time its spelled incorrectly we would have a LOT of dosh.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Everytoime I spotted bad grammer."

But not spelling?

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By *arlee72Couple
over a year ago

Ewell

"What's the weather like up there?"!!!!!

Cracks me up every time!

Mr. Marlee

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Every time someone posts a bitchy comment regarding someone's spelling on the forums

Unnecessary apostrophe there! Tut tut..

Nope, I was correct "

Damn! That's my brain getting all fuddled already,serves me right for trying to be a grammar nazi bastard

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Every time someone posts a bitchy comment regarding someone's spelling on the forums

Unnecessary apostrophe there! Tut tut..

Nope, I was correct

Damn! That's my brain getting all fuddled already,serves me right for trying to be a grammar nazi bastard "

I did have to check to be honest

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


""What's the weather like up there?"!!!!!

Cracks me up every time!

Mr. Marlee "

pissed me off no end when I was in School

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

for every time someone says 'I didn't realise you were really that tall'

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

If I had a £1 for every time I was stuck for a clever or witty riposte only to think of one half an hour or so later when it's too late......

......I'd have been able to give up buying lottery tickets years ago!!

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By *odareyouMan
over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

If I had a £ every time I received a no thanks message I'd be on holiday now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Evey time sumone took the piss over sumthing about me I wood be a moltiy millionaire....

Wot wood make you a moltiy millionaire if you had a £1 for sumthing that happons ??? "

For a everytime I read a comment that has so many spelling mistakes its nearly unreadable

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"Evey time sumone took the piss over sumthing about me I wood be a moltiy millionaire....

Wot wood make you a moltiy millionaire if you had a £1 for sumthing that happons ???

For a everytime I read a comment that has so many spelling mistakes its nearly unreadable "

Same as if I had a pound for everyone that doesn't realise Seeside is dyslexic and comments on his spelling I guess

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By *arlee72Couple
over a year ago

Ewell


""What's the weather like up there?"!!!!!

Cracks me up every time!

Mr. Marlee

pissed me off no end when I was in School"

We people of height need to stick together!

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

Men that say 'oh, you are tiny aren't you' I'd have maybe £50 by now

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

"Oh you are a cute little thing"

I would have enough to buy the shoes I want!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hey, you're tall!

Fuck off, really? Here was me thinking I was short.

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By *eaded_BazMan
over a year ago

Truro


"If I had a £ every time I received a no thanks message I'd be on holiday now. "

I'd have enough to make me more attractive pmsl

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

'cheer up it might never happen' or something along those lines.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"'cheer up it might never happen' or something along those lines. "

Someone on a train once told me "cheer up pet, you look like you're going to a funeral". I was going to a funeral

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Evey time sumone took the piss over sumthing about me I wood be a moltiy millionaire....

Wot wood make you a moltiy millionaire if you had a £1 for sumthing that happons ???

For a everytime I read a comment that has so many spelling mistakes its nearly unreadable

Same as if I had a pound for everyone that doesn't realise Seeside is dyslexic and comments on his spelling I guess "

Surely spellchecker would help a lot though?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"'cheer up it might never happen' or something along those lines.

Someone on a train once told me "cheer up pet, you look like you're going to a funeral". I was going to a funeral "

Ah the Geordie sense of humour, still getting used to it after 17 years.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Someone said I look like a boy because of my short hair.

Someone said my boobs looked fake.

Someone said my ass looks fake.

Someone said I look older than I am.

I'd be a bloody billionaire

~Mia

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By *rs-Naughty_Mr-CuddlesCouple
over a year ago

Nr coleford

£1 for every email return on here and people turning up we would have £2

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By *eeside OP   Man
over a year ago

margate sumwear by the sea


"Evey time sumone took the piss over sumthing about me I wood be a moltiy millionaire....

Wot wood make you a moltiy millionaire if you had a £1 for sumthing that happons ???

For a everytime I read a comment that has so many spelling mistakes its nearly unreadable

Same as if I had a pound for everyone that doesn't realise Seeside is dyslexic and comments on his spelling I guess

Surely spellchecker would help a lot though?"

Hear we go agen .....

Im out of hear.....

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By *ali 69Man
over a year ago

jersey

Every time Lenny Henry never made me laugh ..... I'd be able to buy the fucking Moon.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Everytoime I spotted bad grammer.

But not spelling?"

Woooooosh!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Evey time sumone took the piss over sumthing about me I wood be a moltiy millionaire....

Wot wood make you a moltiy millionaire if you had a £1 for sumthing that happons ???

For a everytime I read a comment that has so many spelling mistakes its nearly unreadable "

98 posts and counting, it clearly isn't that unreadable.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Men offering me a blowjob/sex. I'd be exceedingly rich.

If only woman were as eager!

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By *iffraffMan
over a year ago

Gloucester

If I had a

Pound for every time I failed a maths exam I'd have £6.30

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville


"Evey time sumone took the piss over sumthing about me I wood be a moltiy millionaire....

Wot wood make you a moltiy millionaire if you had a £1 for sumthing that happons ??? "

Number of wanks I've had in one day.

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By *ex on fire500Man
over a year ago

chesterfield

Every time I've been called ugly I would be a bilionaire

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

Customers phone up to ask what a fault code means, when it is in the handbook

Dick

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everytime im called ginger and im not even ginger. Will prove it to anyone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Everytime im called ginger and im not even ginger. Will prove it to anyone "
. Are you strawberry blonde (Kat) xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope i will send you a pic if you want to judge

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Nope i will send you a pic if you want to judge"
. Unfortunately we have single men blocked (Kat) xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fair enough. I was even once called a "ginger ni#@a" im not racist or anything but im pastey white as im welsh, i really dont get it haha

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