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Most embarrassing moment of your life

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By *isscheekychops OP   Woman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

Mine was when I was in Spain about 5 stone heavier than I am now and I sat down on one of them plastic chairs in a bar and it just broke...

Hence when I got home the chocolate went in the bin and the salads came out..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bosses secretary stooped down to get something off the bottom shelf of a cabinet and let a right fookin' ripper go

Fookin' windows were still rattling 1/2 hr later

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By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

That dam chicken and rubber glove story always flashes back at times like this...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was having sex at chams in the room and was so full of wind from having sex... I let out one big fanny fart... I COULD HAVE DIED.lol

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

It might surprise you to know that I'm a complete fucking tool and have a long list of embarrassing moments

One of my favourites is, I was at a night club once and in the loos above the urinals they had a blackboard to write graffiti on (yes it wasn't a classy establishment as you may have already surmised). As an artist I couldn't resist wanting to draw a knob on it but there was no chalk. But! I had the cunning idea to use a blue loo block thing that was on a window sill, you know those little blocks of detergent that sit in a urinal.

So I drew an AWESOME knob on the black board and then had a wee then left to return to my friends and my pint. I was sat chatting and started to feel a burning sensation between my legs. It was just mildly uncomfortable at first through my d*unken haze but the burning was getting more and more fierce until I had to stand up and re-adjust myself then I started to panic it was like my cock was on fire!!! Yes the detergent had been all over my fingers when I took a piss .

At this point my mates were crying laughing at my panic and groping myself in public. I ran to the loo, filled a sink with cold water, dropped my kegs and shreddies leaned over and sunk my balls and cock into the water and just stood there trying to calm down with a slight smile on my face. As stated before this was a low rent establishment the kind where the girls use the men's cubicles when their's are full. There was a queue of girls inside the loo waiting to get into the cubicles all laughing at me and/or tutting and looking away. I just shouted something like have you never seen a cock before! I didn't care. However I had the strangest looks for the rest of night, and of course my mates ripped me to shreds as two of them followed me into the loo to mock. Not my finest moment all round really, my mates still like to bring it up now

And the Adam Ant story but I will leave that for another day...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Being told to get undressed and then examined by 20 medical students, after turning up for a hospital appointment wearing underwear I wear at home!

I think the consultant was a perv as there was no need for me to be in my underwear for a rash on my arms!

Now, I wear matching underwear even if I go to the dentist!

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By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

I once goosed a woman dressed as a nun from behind confident in the knowledge it was my wife...

...it wasn't.

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By *isscheekychops OP   Woman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon


"I once goosed a woman dressed as a nun from behind confident in the knowledge it was my wife...

...it wasn't. "

That is just you... you nutter

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Im thinking im thinking

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By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston


"I once goosed a woman dressed as a nun from behind confident in the knowledge it was my wife...

...it wasn't.

That is just you... you nutter

"

It's true as well

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By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston


"Im thinking im thinking "

Plenty of material to work on I suspect.

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Ooooh just thought of this little embarrassing moment

I was trying on a top that was similar to a corset once in Debenhams and I could'nt get the zip undone to take it off,the more I tried the hotter and more frustrated I got

I had to get the assistant to come in and help me before I just ripped the zip apart,it ended up with her struggling to pull it up over my head and getting more than a faceful of my boobs in the process

I don't show my boobs to just anyone you know!

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By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston


"

I don't show my boobs to just anyone you know!"

Damn

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

once i was on a stage at a festival (im a singer) i saw a friend of ours down the front who was dancing in a crazy way, to try and encourage more people to come and dance i said "come and join the nutters at the front!", unfortunately i didnt see a mentally disabled boy and his careers thought i meant him, so they stormed down the front and gave me a lecture on

discrimination, i was too flustered to explain in front of everyone , eeeeeeeek ! x

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By *acktilMan
over a year ago

Tewkesbury

2005 works do in a 5* hotel, off my face dancing on the table in boxers and bow tie with MD's PA.

Oh the shame. Ohhh Ahhh the feeling as the horney bitch gound herself into me.

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

.

Many years ago was having a smear test at my GPs and was asked if it was ok if a trainee doctor did it.

I assumed the position and closed my eyes, the deed was done and I was asked to get dressed.

When the 'doctor' turned round it was a guy I went to junior school with.

My comment was, well you always did like playing doctors and nurses.

You could have heard a pin drop.

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By *arkandjaneCouple
over a year ago

Lancaster

Mark dared me to get a porn mag from a newsagents when i went in to get a sunday paper, Oh thats easy i said and went marching into the shop, had a look at the top shelf , i thought right no one around get the magazine put it down with the paper pay for it and leave,

I went to get it but being small i couldnt reach so had to ask the guy to get it down for me, by which time 2 or 3 customers had walked in, i think i was the colour of a beetroot.

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By *drianukMan
over a year ago

Spain, Lancs

I was 22 and placed ad in paper to meet a cpl for fun. I got a reply and went round at the stated time. It was a wind up! There was a woman in her 40s there but it was her friends who had replied to the ad. I had quite a bit of explaining to do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was showing a porno mag to a couple of mates years ago and as they were flicking through it I told them to wait till they got to the centre page, she was a real babe. They flick the mag to the centre pages for an eager look.... only to find them stuck together!

There's just no explaining your way out of that one.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Far far to many to mention. I usually try to block them from my mind. One of the most recent, i walked round downtown at grantham with my knickers tucked in my skirt for at least ten minutes before a lady told me.

Fell down numreous flights of stairs in front of people.

Saw my mum parked up so, jumped in and sat in the car only it wasnt my mum.

Went out on a date with the wrong guy once and didnt know till he told me at the end of the night

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

sex wise, ive gone straight back over a brick wall. Had sex at the top of some scaffolding and the guy fell off.

Was at the camp and discretely having sex behind one of the fire engines, on the ground until the fire engine pulled off. The watch in the knickers that i mentioned the other night

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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago

Hull

I can laugh about this now, but at the time, I was mortified!

Many years ago, I was in a London based choir and one performance was in St. Paul's Cathedral in London. The event was being recorded by Thames Television (shows how long ago that was!) as the programme was highly significant for some reason and anybody who was important was there.

These included Clergy, MP's, Landed Gentry, high ranking Armed Forces personnel and so on. There was a lavish reception first, then the event. I was due to sing a duet with one of our Contraltos; come the point in time, we walked out to the front of the stage as the orchestral introduction began.

Now, I never usually got nervous, but I was this time, but thought I'd be ok once I began singing, around 1 "bar" ahead of my female colleague. But as I drew in a deep breath and opened my mouth for my first word, all that emerged was.... "Buuuuuurp!"

Then my female colleague collapsed in fits of giggles, along with the chorus behind us, as did our orchestra, TV and stage crews. Looks that would kill came from the distinguished audience.

I wanted the Crypt below to open up and swallow me!

We did 2 retakes, but each time, whilst I was now OK, my female colleague, corpsed into giggles, and that section was shelved!

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn

had quite a few, but the latest one was a few weeks ago. i dont work fridays and was waiting on mr a to come home, the door went and i went down to answer it as i thought it was him, i was completely naked and opened door to find postman standing there.it was wishing ground would open up moment.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

getting my cock stuck in my zip, being taken to the hospital in an ambulance.. in A&E with nurses my mum worked beside..

staying overnight in a ward.. and my sister coming to visit with her school pal and giggling..

I was 14..

bitch.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Happiness is a dry fart...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 19/05/11 21:27:00]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Getting my head attached to a wardrobe door and ending up re colouring me mates new cream bedroom...twas blood red after.

And ending up in sellyoak ozzie. still have a horse shoe scar.

And once when with two guys at chams and have a whopper of an orgasm....I sat up after and promptly threw up all over the place .

Ahem !!!

Oh and yes....did clean up with the help of the guys

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside


"Mine was when I was in Spain about 5 stone heavier than I am now and I sat down on one of them plastic chairs in a bar and it just broke...

Hence when I got home the chocolate went in the bin and the salads came out.. "

Getting run over by an ambulance.

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