FabSwingers.com forum: Adulting

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So I hope I'm not in the minority here (ethnic pun intended!) but was hoping to get some opinions...

Some people will be incredibly lucky in that they are very confident and/or amazingly approachable that they can make friends incredibly easily. Also some will have kept their friends from childhood/school/university that they don't have to worry too much about making new ones.

For those people, who like myself, moved across the country for a job so lost contact with the few friends they had and/or they lost their friends due to a falling out, people in relationships who only go out with other couples and not their single friends etc - how do you go about making new friends as an adult? What would you do to gain new friends to chill out witg, go out with etc?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't find it particularly easy to make friends. I've made 3 friends in my adult life: one I met through a common interest which we both blogged about, one I worked with and one I met from here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't find it particularly easy to make friends. I've made 3 friends in my adult life: one I met through a common interest which we both blogged about, one I worked with and one I met from here. "

I'll be your friend... in a non sexual way xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

*shrugs*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good thing I like my own company.

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

Do you have any hobbies? If so maybe try to find a group or club for that. I dont know how busy you are how but what about doing some kind of night class? Jack.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I like my own company - until "we" argue. And I lose the argument lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's difficult alright. Best thing to do is to start getting involved in hobbies you'd enjoy, or things that are important to your personality.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Oh yeah forgot to add - since I'm not terribly good looking, bit low on the self confidence... I work night shift too!

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By *adyDangerWoman
over a year ago

land of debauchery and kink

I tend to make friends very easily I'm very approachable and friendly. Gab the leg off anyone I will x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's a website called Meetup which has all sorts of different groups for people to meet up, some are based round an interest or hobby and others are just social groups.

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By *adyDangerWoman
over a year ago

land of debauchery and kink

"Oh yeah forgot to add - since I'm not terribly good looking, bit low on the self confidence... I work night shift too!

Join some Local clubs for socialising or see if your work have social nights /days out x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you have hobbies see if there are any groups in your area. There are Meetup groups you could sign up for.

Not much help as I'm more of a loner, but if I wanted to get sociable I'd join a rambling group or something.

Good luck

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By *eesideMan
over a year ago

margate sumwear by the sea

I find it verry hard these days to make friends simpley cos in the parst I've had ''Friends'' and ''famley'' stab me in the back. 1ce literally in school.

As a side effect my trust for others just don't exzist thees days.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Keep the replies coming guys much appreciated!

One reason I'm bringing it up is because I'm more anonymous on here than Facebook. Just talking on there about men suffering depression etc and that they just don't have friends. Didn't wanna really admit on there I'm lonely and struggle to make friends so thought I'd bring it up on here.

So kinda hoping any guy (or woman) who's a loner like me can make friends from tips on here then I thought I'd be that guy to bring it up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just develop an unhealthy obsession with the internet and most of the time you forget you're alone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There's a website called Meetup which has all sorts of different groups for people to meet up, some are based round an interest or hobby and others are just social groups."

A friend of mine relocated from London to Manchester a couple of years ago and didn't know anyone at all. She's found MeetUp really good for getting to know people with similar interests and establishing a social circle in a new city.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't find it particularly easy to make friends. I've made 3 friends in my adult life: one I met through a common interest which we both blogged about, one I worked with and one I met from here.

I'll be your friend... in a non sexual way xxx"

I should add...I'm quite happy with not making friends easily, I'm not someone who needs loads and loads of "friends", a few good ones is plenty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't find it particularly easy to make friends. I've made 3 friends in my adult life: one I met through a common interest which we both blogged about, one I worked with and one I met from here.

I'll be your friend... in a non sexual way xxx

I should add...I'm quite happy with not making friends easily, I'm not someone who needs loads and loads of "friends", a few good ones is plenty

Hey, it's always worth a try

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By *rcticFoxxxWoman
over a year ago

Hereabouts

I moved from Surrey to Yorkshire to Lancashire the space of a year. I had no friends in Yorkshire and my only friends in Lancashire are my boyfriend's friends. I'm no good at making friends. Online friends, yeah. Real life friends, nah I wouldn't even know where to start...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't find it particularly easy to make friends. I've made 3 friends in my adult life: one I met through a common interest which we both blogged about, one I worked with and one I met from here.

I'll be your friend... in a non sexual way xxx

I should add...I'm quite happy with not making friends easily, I'm not someone who needs loads and loads of "friends", a few good ones is plenty

Totally agree with this

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don't find it particularly easy to make friends. I've made 3 friends in my adult life: one I met through a common interest which we both blogged about, one I worked with and one I met from here.

I'll be your friend... in a non sexual way xxx

I should add...I'm quite happy with not making friends easily, I'm not someone who needs loads and loads of "friends", a few good ones is plenty

See I agree with this too. Im just talking about making a few quality friends who can be there for yiu and just chill with etc

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By *adyDangerWoman
over a year ago

land of debauchery and kink

"I don't find it particularly easy to make friends. I've made 3 friends in my adult life: one I met through a common interest which we both blogged about, one I worked with and one I met from here.

I'll be your friend... in a non sexual way xxx

I should add...I'm quite happy with not making friends easily, I'm not someone who needs loads and loads of "friends", a few good ones is plenty

See I agree with this too. Im just talking about making a few quality friends who can be there for yiu and just chill with etc"

That comes with time. I've 3 very close true friends. But lots of people I know who I still class as friends, i just wouldn't tell them my intimate personal stuff as I do with my best 3 friends. X

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By *eanut Butter CupWoman
over a year ago

B & M Bargains

I'm lucky I have a hobby so I have friends through that. Lost all my school friends, and only in contact with one person I worked with (and now because of fab

I struggle to make friends even though I'm clearly awesome

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I moved here from another country and found it pretty hard to make friends where I never found it that difficult in the past. I don't really have any advice. I used Meetup but found the people to be really unreliable. I would say that work is a good place to meet knew people, but personally everyone at my former job was way older than me and I couldn't relate. I dunno, OP.

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

I've moved around a lot but have kept school and uni friends. Plus I make friends easily.

If you struggle a bit then socials on here can help or use the meetup dot come website

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it's particularly hard if you're a little socially awkward or are lacking self-esteem. I've made my friends through hobbies and classes, but then I'll go and chat to anyone.

CitySocialiser is quite good or maybe a social from here!

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By *obwithkiltMan
over a year ago

Belton

Volunteer for something sir! Gets you socialising, you help out and you meet people... I was going to have a really lonely summer when I first split with ex wife..... I volunteered for a festival, 5years on I work in the industry and have friends that live all over place but meet up every now and then... And you are already making friends by participating in the forums

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

arrange a social in your area? or go to them. see what's on in your area with your interests.

i have the confidence, just don't have the trust...but every single person i interact with helps me gain that trust and since my first 1 on 1 social with someone from here i have started gaining that trust, and it's gone up immensely this past 6 months.

my non-fab friend is from toddler groups i used to go to, a type of social for parents i suppose but that's who i needed at that time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are websites where you can meet up with people who dont have a huge amount of friends and/or who want to meet for a coffee or meal as they have just moved to a new area. You can meet as a group or just with another person. Worth considering.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I don't have any male friends and the lady friends are friends of my wife, the husbands of which are boring drones. I would like a bi married friend just like me (called Narcissus lol) but no one is interested. There again, I don't actively look or ask, I just thought such a thing might happen.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I moved away from all my friends earlier in the year and since then I've had just ads to talk to, I've got a good social job now so that should improve it somewhat but I struggle at first, I find conversations difficult.

Try as I might to keep my old friends I know I've lost many of them as I seem to be the one always willing to travel to see them, never the other way round (granted I was the one that moved but still) they get on with their lives, still go out with each other and that's quite hard

G x

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Making friends on here should be encouraged.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a wide circle of friends - some going back to primary school - but only a handful of besties.

I moved up from London to the North West as a young newlywed and the culture change was a big shock. Luckily I easily made friends through work, the gym, church, and later toddler groups and school, so I've never felt isolated away from my family.

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

I don't have any real friends, I have some acquaintances but I'm an army brat so moved around a lot and lost contact with all school friends and Aberdeen is not the friendliest unless you are born and bred here so will always be an outsider but I am used to it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't have any real friends, I have some acquaintances but I'm an army brat so moved around a lot and lost contact with all school friends and Aberdeen is not the friendliest unless you are born and bred here so will always be an outsider but I am used to it

You could always move.

FYI - Dublin is a friendly place.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a lot of friends from my travels. Don't keep in touch as much as I'd like sometimes. But u find once I'm in a position of getting to know people, I tend to come out of my shell a little more.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know what you mean. I've lived here for years and don't know many people, I work away & my family/friends are miles away. It is hard to meet people, dating or just to socialise.

I found this website yesterday, worth a look to see what's on near you. Www.meet up.com

Seems to be loads of people in the same boat.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've always had trouble meeting people in my adult life, especially as over the course of my marriage I lost touch with all of my friends. Recently though I've been lucky to meet some lovely people and as time goes on I'm open to more people entering my life

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

I don't make friends easily, but I've made one through work, a few through here, and a couple through Meet Ups.

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By *trawberry-popWoman
over a year ago

South East Midlands NOT

I've met some great girls on here, which is nice cos otherwise I wouldn't have known a soul in this shire! I also have made friends with a couple of work colleagues.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find it quite easy to make friends as an adult, one person will say something I agree with or find funny, and that's it they have made a friend, if they continue that friendship, that's up to them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dude..

You can have one of mine.

They're fucking nutcases.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't have any real friends Geeky is the only person who I talk to even the people I work with do things with each other but I'm never invited other people I thought were my friends dropped me as soon as my circumstances changed only "friend" who still talks to me was deported last year so can't hang out with him

Ads

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman
over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!

I think I'm way to antisocial at time's,I don't do myself any favours

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You aren't alone. I've recently moved and did put a plea on Facebook and found another mum living in the same place as me but that's it. I don't do the school run either as I'm at work so haven't really struck up conversations there either.

So if anyone is in the Somerset area and fancies a natter, male or female give me a shout

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

play sport

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hope you make some new friends following advice from here.

I saw a cartoon caption once.It was a cute cartoon person hugging a computer screen. It read,(I love my computer because all of my friends are in here) Aww'.

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By *ysnomiaMan
over a year ago

Preston

There are apps for the phone and computer that let you sign up and meet like minded folk in your area, for all areas and interests.

And as was said above, go to a fab social in your area, or even organise one. You already know you have something in common there...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't find it particularly easy to make friends. I've made 3 friends in my adult life: one I met through a common interest which we both blogged about, one I worked with and one I met from here.

I'll be your friend... in a non sexual way xxx

I should add...I'm quite happy with not making friends easily, I'm not someone who needs loads and loads of "friends", a few good ones is plenty

Better to have a few close friends who you trust with your life than loads of people in varying shades of friendship.

I have a handful of very close friends and I like it that way.

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By *ust RachelTV/TS
over a year ago

Horsham

I have made one or two friends in my interests that I have, or through work.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll someone with a stock of Nutella, kinder buenos and a soft skin shoulder to cry on while watching Lassie.

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Adulting - making friends