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You guys keep asking for the recipe, here it is!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Once again this year I've had requests for my vodka Christmas cake recipe so here goes. Please keep it in your files as I'm beginning to get tired of typing this up every year! (Made mine this morning!!!)

1 cup sugar, half pound butter, 1tsp baking powder, 1 cup water, 1tsp salt, 1cup brown sugar, lemon juice, 4 large eggs, nuts, 1....bottle vodka, 2 cups dried fruit, 4 cups self raising flour.

Sample a cup of vodka to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the vodka again to be sure it is of the highest quality, then repeat. Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add 1 teaspoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point, it's best to make sure the vodka is still ok. Try another cup just in case.

Turn off the mixer thingy. Break 2 eegs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Pick the fruit off the floor, wash it and put it in the bowl a piece at a time trying to count it. Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers, just pry it loose with a drewscriver. Sample the vodka to test for tonsisticity. Next sift 2 cups of salt, or something. Check the vodka. Now shit shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar or somefink. Whatever you can find. Greash the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl through thfeckin window. Finish off the vodka and wipe the worktop with the feckin cat.

Enjoy!

BG x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside


"Once again this year I've had requests for my vodka Christmas cake recipe so here goes. Please keep it in your files as I'm beginning to get tired of typing this up every year! (Made mine this morning!!!)

1 cup sugar, half pound butter, 1tsp baking powder, 1 cup water, 1tsp salt, 1cup brown sugar, lemon juice, 4 large eggs, nuts, 1....bottle vodka, 2 cups dried fruit, 4 cups self raising flour.

Sample a cup of vodka to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the vodka again to be sure it is of the highest quality, then repeat. Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add 1 teaspoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point, it's best to make sure the vodka is still ok. Try another cup just in case.

Turn off the mixer thingy. Break 2 eegs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Pick the fruit off the floor, wash it and put it in the bowl a piece at a time trying to count it. Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers, just pry it loose with a drewscriver. Sample the vodka to test for tonsisticity. Next sift 2 cups of salt, or something. Check the vodka. Now shit shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar or somefink. Whatever you can find. Greash the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl through thfeckin window. Finish off the vodka and wipe the worktop with the feckin cat.

Enjoy!

BG x"
haha made me laugh out loud... so wish i liked fruit cake...got any vodka left?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hehe love it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So basically, what you're saying is...forget making a cake and just drink a bottle of vodka?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford

At first I seriously thought you were starting a cookery thread, and you have the cheek to call me old!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Made my night

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

What size bottle of vodka?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"What size bottle of vodka?

"

I like to use a litre. No point over doing it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"At first I seriously thought you were starting a cookery thread, and you have the cheek to call me old! "

It's like you don't know me!

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"What size bottle of vodka?

I like to use a litre. No point over doing it. "

Thanks. I wanted to ensure I followed the recipe exactly. You know what it's like when making a cake.

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By *atelotmanMan
over a year ago

Chatham

I use a bottle of 100% proof rum myself.

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford


"At first I seriously thought you were starting a cookery thread, and you have the cheek to call me old!

It's like you don't know me! "

Where's my fucking cheesecake, woman?

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"At first I seriously thought you were starting a cookery thread, and you have the cheek to call me old!

It's like you don't know me!

Where's my fucking cheesecake, woman?"

Cheesecake that fucks? It sounds too good to be true but I'd really enjoy the oral.

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

I have this on Fax paper I think

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 19/11/16 21:53:27]

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"I have this on Fax paper I think "

Ah, the days of thermal fax paper.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

and you want me to cook with you in the kitchen ----- DONT BRING VODKA

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i can't follow that method quite. can i substitute the cat for a ferret without detriment to this recipe?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"i can't follow that method quite. can i substitute the cat for a ferret without detriment to this recipe? "

A little rule-bending is allowed!

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By *orwegian BlueMan
over a year ago

Iceland, but Aldi is closer..

After half a bottom of jacket Daniel, the last bits made perfectly sense..

Gonna make that npw while I eat me kebab..

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"After half a bottom of jacket Daniel, the last bits made perfectly sense..

Gonna make that npw while I eat me kebab.. "

Bon apetit

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"i can't follow that method quite. can i substitute the cat for a ferret without detriment to this recipe?

A little rule-bending is allowed! "

noted..

right...to the hutches!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"i can't follow that method quite. can i substitute the cat for a ferret without detriment to this recipe?

A little rule-bending is allowed!

noted..

right...to the hutches! "

I don't need to taste. Thanks!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"At first I seriously thought you were starting a cookery thread, and you have the cheek to call me old!

It's like you don't know me!

Where's my fucking cheesecake, woman?"

I missed this... you'll be baking it, I'll be dictating!

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