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If your pets could talk

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By *uckOfTheBay OP   Man
over a year ago

Mold

What would they say to you ?

My dog would be saying "Where's my dinner? !"

It's a common theme of his

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By *ooking for bbwsCouple
over a year ago

secret garden chilling, always something to do in the garden


"What would they say to you ?

My dog would be saying "Where's my dinner? !"

It's a common theme of his "

my cat, I need a cuddle, leave me alone I'm asleep, makes a grunt, or I want my foooooood... sometimes in a loud mmmmeeeeoooowwww mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My fish would have said 'help!' - it was swimming around perfectly well earlier but died suddenly

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By *uckOfTheBay OP   Man
over a year ago

Mold


"My fish would have said 'help!' - it was swimming around perfectly well earlier but died suddenly "

Did he drown ?

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

my cat does not make noise.. she stares and has telepathic ability.

she communicates with me, from the'what the hell, is that?' type, to,

'oh no, its not him again (about my other cat), to

'it's time for bed, now..err yes it is!' type messages, all of which i totally obey..of course ..cos have you seen her stare, its serious, you dont mess with that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Food!

Stroke!

Drink!

Out!

In!

GIVEMEATTENTIONORISHALLACTUPLIKEANAUGHTYTODDLER.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My Patterdales are really vocal. The bitch especially. If she could speak in a language I understand I bet she would be very needy and demanding. The dog is only interested in his tummy and the potential food available. The only word he'd need is 'more'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Demons know better than to talk

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mine would be saying

Wtf i need a wee let me out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What do you mean IF ? pets could talk .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My much loved and missed Lab used to look at me with a quizzical expression and say "if you wanted the ball why did you throw it away?"

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By *a Fee VerteWoman
over a year ago

Limbo

My cats: Gimme food, gimme food now!, gimme even more space on the sofa/bed, let me in/let me out/let me in/let me out (ad infinitum), gimme a stroke, gimme a cuddle, tell me how beautiful I am (ad infinitum), what do you mean, you don't like ripped up pigeon all over the hall?, you can fuck off with that worming pill or I'll bite your fingers .....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My fish would have said 'help!' - it was swimming around perfectly well earlier but died suddenly

Did he drown ? "

Heartless ..

.

.

.

lol

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By *uckOfTheBay OP   Man
over a year ago

Mold


"My fish would have said 'help!' - it was swimming around perfectly well earlier but died suddenly

Did he drown ? "

Sorry, that was rather uncalled for

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mine would be saying. Enough with the Fireworks now!!!

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By *oddyWoman
over a year ago

between havant and chichester

My cats what you mean no i cant have that i want it no i wont be quiet then they run to see whose knocked the door and if on phone they have to say hello to

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales

Our Akita.

"Where's dad? Where's dad? Where's dad? Yeah, yeah I'm glad your back now fuck off out the way! Where's dad? Where's dad?" etc.etc. or when cooking or dishing up dinner

"Will you fuck off dog?"

"But I like sausages/pie/spag bol, chicken,fish etc.."

"& I only got this dried shit! You wankers!"

S

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My fish would have said 'help!' - it was swimming around perfectly well earlier but died suddenly "

Same happened to one of our lizards the other day

Later the same day 2 more hatched

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside


"Our Akita.

"Where's dad? Where's dad? Where's dad? Yeah, yeah I'm glad your back now fuck off out the way! Where's dad? Where's dad?" etc.etc. or when cooking or dishing up dinner

"Will you fuck off dog?"

"But I like sausages/pie/spag bol, chicken,fish etc.."

"& I only got this dried shit! You wankers!"

S

"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

my penny would have said am sick get the vet told! she was a rabbit

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

'It's bloody cold outside mum'

'are you sure you've fed me? '

' give me a cuddle '

Are just some of the things he says.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My cat only goes out to go to the loo and calls to come in. If I make her wait, when I do open the door she does a noise for which there is no onomatopoeia but you know she's saying "took ya time, ya cunt

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By *uckOfTheBay OP   Man
over a year ago

Mold

My dog's currently drooling on my knee, looking intently into my eyes, and saying

"If you let me lick the gravy from your plate, I'll be the most faithful hound ever "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Food!

Stroke!

Drink!

Out!

In!

GIVEMEATTENTIONORISHALLACTUPLIKEANAUGHTYTODDLER."

Actually that sounds like me too...

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales


"My cat only goes out to go to the loo and calls to come in. If I make her wait, when I do open the door she does a noise for which there is no onomatopoeia but you know she's saying "took ya time, ya cunt "

Took the dog out late nearly dark round the fields, off the lead off he goes, now he usually foes a long two fielder, anyway O lost him in the dark, walks the two fields on my own on the pissing rain.

Gets back towards home and he's sitting under the patio table with a look that says

"You do know it's raining you daft cunt? I only wanted a poo, fuck staying out here"

S

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By *umpkinMan
over a year ago

near the sounds of the wimborne quarter jack!

My cat certainly recognises words used to her routinely. "you coming?" "box(litter tray) is done" "come and see!" and she responds vocally to "aaooowt" and "night"

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By *umpkinMan
over a year ago

near the sounds of the wimborne quarter jack!


"My cat only goes out to go to the loo and calls to come in. If I make her wait, when I do open the door she does a noise for which there is no onomatopoeia but you know she's saying "took ya time, ya cunt

Took the dog out late nearly dark round the fields, off the lead off he goes, now he usually foes a long two fielder, anyway O lost him in the dark, walks the two fields on my own on the pissing rain.

Gets back towards home and he's sitting under the patio table with a look that says

"You do know it's raining you daft cunt? I only wanted a poo, fuck staying out here"

S"

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

My pups got hiccups and has just woken himself up... He's looking at me if it's my fault

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My dog Wld probably say ffs woman stop blow drying my fur with round brush I'm not one of ur kids!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My pups got hiccups and has just woken himself up... He's looking at me if it's my fault "

Fantastic, love it when they do that.

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury


"My pups got hiccups and has just woken himself up... He's looking at me if it's my fault

Fantastic, love it when they do that. "

He's now snoring away

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My dogs would probably just ask me why they can't spend more time with Marc.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My cat wouldn't need to talk, he makes a mournful face which says "feed me, do you want me to starve? I was abandoned as a kitten, you're giving me flashbacks".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't have kids so my beautiful dog is my baby. Tonight I reckon she'd be saying "come on mum, I know you're sad, let's cuddle up on the sofa and eat shit"

Furry friends are definitely therapy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

my dog is currently saying "shift over and let me on that bed. it's far too big for one person you greedy git" followed by a big huff.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't think I'd want to know what mine would say, especially as they are tarantulas!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My cats would say I like you and that's why we aren't going to kill you in your sleep, but instead we'll sit on top of the wardrobe so we can watch you sleep

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By *ellbound_GhoulwarpWoman
over a year ago

Fifth Circle of Hell

My cat would probably say something along the lines of "your a fucking bitch but like your fluffy jacket and the expensive food you give me so i'll forgive you" haha

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By *trawberry-popWoman
over a year ago

South East Midlands NOT

The guinea pigs always say 'feed us again mum'. I see it on their faces and hear it in their wheekings!

My female rabbit would say 'get out of my way bitch' then she maybe wouldn't need to head-butt me and bite my ankles. Male bun would be with the pigs asking for more food.

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham


"What do you mean IF ? pets could talk ."

Mine chatter loads

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If my pets could talk, they would swear all the time having been sworn at (in an affectionate way) their entire lives. One dog thinks he has a whole list of names as well as his real one, from 'fat arse' to 'umpalumpa'!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My cats would tell me I spend too much of my day perving gorgeous women on this site and wanking!

and wanking...

and wanking...

and more wanking...

ad infinitum...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My cats would say I like you and that's why we aren't going to kill you in your sleep, but instead we'll sit on top of the wardrobe so we can watch you sleep"

Pervy cats you have!

Actually, I might like to join them on that!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What would they say to you ?

My dog would be saying "Where's my dinner? !"

It's a common theme of his "
3 dogs 3 cats 6 horses 3 sheep all very spoilt . Would say what ever I need I get. lol

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

My pet giraffe would be saying, "Can't we move to somewhere with higher ceilings"

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By *ust RachelTV/TS
over a year ago

Horsham

My Shih Tzu would be,

can I have that, normally when you are eating.

I want you here now

I want picking up.

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Ma pet hippopotamus would be saying, "Can't we get a bigger bath"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My dog would say "oh good you're back you've been ages I was lonely all by myself I thought you'd left forever I'm so happy you're back I'm gonna run backwards and forwards like an idiot and maybe do a little wee wee" when I've been 5 minutes putting the bins out!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My cat only goes out to go to the loo and calls to come in. If I make her wait, when I do open the door she does a noise for which there is no onomatopoeia but you know she's saying "took ya time, ya cunt

Took the dog out late nearly dark round the fields, off the lead off he goes, now he usually foes a long two fielder, anyway O lost him in the dark, walks the two fields on my own on the pissing rain.

Gets back towards home and he's sitting under the patio table with a look that says

"You do know it's raining you daft cunt? I only wanted a poo, fuck staying out here"

S"

Funny how they can demean us without saying a word

...and yes, very therapeutic furry little buggers

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By *ficouldMan
over a year ago

a quandary, could you change my mind?

[Removed by poster at 06/11/16 23:24:59]

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By *ficouldMan
over a year ago

a quandary, could you change my mind?

This thread is brilliant..

My lab would be saying..

'o please can we stay out just a bit longer'

'I't wasn't me' (looking up with guilty eyes after going into the bin)

'catch me if you can'

'no it's mine'

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

My pet crocodile would be saying, "Can we have a game of snap"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

my dog would probably say, 'I love you daddy'..

well i'd hope she'd say that after all the effort I put into her

harry

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My Greyhound would say put the bloody fire on

The lab would say....i love you mummy.....mummy, mummy i love you mummy....give me a treat

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

My pet Goldfish would be saying, "Can you let me out of this plastic bag now"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My degus would tell me to go forth and multiply, my hamster would scream that he loves mummy time

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By *aeganaWoman
over a year ago

birmingham

Mine talks enough already weird when ur cat says no mom ans nan but yea he would ask for food 24/7 and belly rubs

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

My pet seal would be saying, "Get that fucking Hippo out of the bath!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My cats would be telling me to piss off trying to hug them and to put some clothes on.

Mr Susan would be telling me to kick Michael out of the house for they night as she hates him.

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

My pet Penguin would be saying, "Are you gonna p.p.p.pick me up or what?"

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

My pet snake would be saying, "Are we going on this bloody plane or what?"

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

My pet Polar Bear would be saying, "I don't think I can stomach anymore glacier mints, can I have some of the seal's fish please?"

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

My pet Gorilla would be saying, "Can't we listen to something else now, I'm fed up with In The Air Tonight"

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

My parrot would say ha you think that silly little catch will stop me getting out your wrong. I'm going to bite the dogs ears..

Both dogs would be saying the others pitched their food and please keep that blasted parrot locked up it keeps biting our ears..

And finally the rabbit would be saying if any of them twats come near me I'm going to kick the shit out of them.

Yes I live in a blasted zoo

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By *ellowbabesCouple
over a year ago

newport/cwmbran

If the cat could talk....he,d either be blackmailing me or demanding therapy

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

My cat right now is sat on the settee arm and asking when I'm going to put the pad down so he can come sit on my knee

Bless him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If the cat could talk....he,d either be blackmailing me or demanding therapy "

Something like that lol he's seen too much

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales


"If the cat could talk....he,d either be blackmailing me or demanding therapy

Something like that lol he's seen too much "

Ours would also say

"If you do that in the same room again i'm gonna lick your foot at an inopportune moment again! at least shut me in the kitchen next time i'm only four ffs!"

S

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By *G LanaTV/TS
over a year ago

Gosport

One of my cats is busy telling me how good a hunter it is because it has 'caught' a toy mouse. The other is probably trying to point out how rude it would be for its hot water bottle to get up.

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By *uckOfTheBay OP   Man
over a year ago

Mold

"You threwthrew that bloody ball, you go fetch it "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pretty sure our dog would say

"You seriously expect me to go out in that to pee?!"

"Shove over you gits middle of the beds MINE"

"This spot right here the only bit of sun coming through the window is ALL mine"

Or

"Touch me, touch me, touch me"

He's a bigger princess than me, if it's windy or wet he hates going out, if we're cuddled up he tries his hardest to get in the middle of us, and he constantly wants a fuss and loves nothing more than sun bathing.

Mrs Dirty

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By *atietvsheffTV/TS
over a year ago

Sheffield

Feckin hell not again, my dads become my mum.........

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By *ylvanSeathMan
over a year ago

Finchley

"I see you making out over there, I'm very happy for you and I'mma let you finish... but at present my need for attention is greater than yours"

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By *andm_69Couple
over a year ago

Stevenage

Our ferrets would be like come on guys open the door so we can ruining the garden and then be like where's are rabbit dinner/ I want dinner now (all in a child's voice)

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