FabSwingers.com forum: Am I wrong

By *ild-1 OP Woman
over a year ago

york

So I'm new to all this & have arranged my 1st social for tonight. Am I wrong in wanting it to be in a public place & not my home? From the start I've said the first meet has to be no pressure & no sex. Am I the odd one out??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope you're not, most socials tend to be in a publicity place. I certainly wouldn't have someone I didn't know at my house. Best to be safe than sorry.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's the sensible choice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope, that's what I do too.

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By *imply_SensualMan
over a year ago

warrington

If a guy is not happy meeting you in a public place first, you have to question the reasons why.... and then question whether its right to meet him at all.

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

[Removed by poster at 20/10/16 09:53:32]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Probably best somewhere you'd quite like to be anyway in case of a no show.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So I'm new to all this & have arranged my 1st social for tonight. Am I wrong in wanting it to be in a public place & not my home? From the start I've said the first meet has to be no pressure & no sex. Am I the odd one out?? "

Not the odd one out. And personally any man who doesn't want a public social raises suspicions

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

No, you're spot on there missus, always arrange a first social in a public place. That way both of you should feel safe

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By *ild-1 OP Woman
over a year ago

york

Thank you I'm glad you agree that makes me feel better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No that's how it should be, never invite or even tell a stranger where you live. If possable have a friend who you can ring or gem ring you to check your ok

D and L

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutely not no Op. Very sensible choice

Enjoy and have fun

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By *uckOfTheBayMan
over a year ago

Mold

I would never consider inviting a stranger to my house

For personal safety, and other considerations, you should always meet in a public place, where either party has the obligation of walking away if things don't go the way they're planned.

I also find that it's much more relaxing as you're under far less pressure

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

"Thank you I'm glad you agree that makes me feel better "

Good luck, I hope you end up having some horny fun with the lucky guy in question

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it's the safest choice OP. You don't know this man, you wouldn't want him knowing where you live. Who knows what type of man he is until you meet him?! You did completely the right thing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not odd at all. Its for you to choose.

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By *erbyDalesCplCouple
over a year ago

Derbyshire

"If a guy is not happy meeting you in a public place first, you have to question the reasons why.... and then question whether its right to meet him at all."

I'd agree with that.

We always do a public social first, even if we're planning to move on to play. For women on their own I'd say it is a must. Any man pressuring you to compromise on what makes you feel safe or comfortable isn't someone we'd want to meet.

Mr ddc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why would you think it wrong? A very very sensible choice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

no definatley not wrong at all,

always be safe until you feel comfortable,and always meet in a public place 1st

then if you are comfortable let the fun begin

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree with all the sensible advice already given.

Keep it safe at all times!! Well at least until the second meet lol. Then get as kinky as you're happy with xx

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

Meet, however works best for you. Stick to your guns and don't feel pressured to change, just to suit others.

Some will share your approach and some won't. No one is right or wrong as such, just different.

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By *an_WoodMan
over a year ago

Stafford

Great approach

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

You are perfectly fine and I would do it no other way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

no, I think the majority of people would opt to meet that way, me included...it's the safest option

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If a guy is not happy meeting you in a public place first, you have to question the reasons why.... and then question whether its right to meet him at all."

safety is top priority too many weirdo's about.

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By *inkySlinkyCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

I hope you have a lovely social and both get on well.

Sally

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I personally think it's commendable that you're opting for a public place first, that way you can gauge how the other person is and if it's going well or not.

If it goes well, you can arrange another meet, if not, you can walk away.

Imagine if you met at your home first, and god forbid it turns nasty, you're trapped. At least in a public place you can easily obtain help if it does turn a bit sour.

Thankfully these nasty scenarios are rare, but you're certainly showing you're sensible by arranging to meet in a public place first; I would happily meet a lady in a public place first if that is what she wishes.

Good luck OP, and I hope everything turns out OK for you!

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By *ild-1 OP Woman
over a year ago

york

"I personally think it's commendable that you're opting for a public place first, that way you can gauge how the other person is and if it's going well or not.

If it goes well, you can arrange another meet, if not, you can walk away.

Imagine if you met at your home first, and god forbid it turns nasty, you're trapped. At least in a public place you can easily obtain help if it does turn a bit sour.

Good luck OP, and I hope everything turns out OK for you!

Thank you I will stick to my guns xx

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By *orkie321bWoman
over a year ago

Nottingham

Definitely stick to your guns. If anyone is pressuring you to do something you're not comfortable with tell them to fuck off!

I prefer a social meet first in a public place and if they are not willing to do this i won't meet them.

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By *ild-1 OP Woman
over a year ago

york

"Definitely stick to your guns. If anyone is pressuring you to do something you're not comfortable with tell them to fuck off!

I prefer a social meet first in a public place and if they are not willing to do this i won't meet them."

I'm waiting on his response ....

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By *ureTemptationWoman
over a year ago

Off the grid

I'm really worried why you're asking if it's wrong?

If he doesn't want to meet socially in a public place, that would be alarm bells for me. It's easy for women to meet men on Fab, there are a lot of guys who will be happy to stick to your rules. If he doesn't like it, find the next one who does.

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman
over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!

Of course not,there's no right and wrong way just do what is best for you.

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

"Thank you I will stick to my guns xx "

Ah shit, I'm not gonna arrange a social with you if you've got a gun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No no no you're not wrong that's really good and safe for you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope your not and your 'meet' should respect your decision to have it in a public place, no pressure and no sex. If they can't respect that then they are not worth the effort.

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman
over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!

"If a guy is not happy meeting you in a public place first, you have to question the reasons why.... and then question whether its right to meet him at all.

safety is top priority too many weirdo's about."

Are there,I tend to meet fairly sane people I can honestly say I haven't come across any weirdo's yet. Maybe it's because I speak to them for quite a while first or perhaps I just don't attract that type.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're not wrong.

I meet in clubs first few times. I like dominant strong men and that could be potentially a bit dangerous.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure if others have said it as haven't read all posts but :

Meet in social place.

Tell a friend you have a date.

Tell her/him where your meeting.

Give him/her a time you will call.

Tell him/her if you don't call to call you.

If you don't pick up tell her to go there ASAP.

Don't do anything your guy instinct says not to do. Guy instinct is usually right.

Don't drink too much.

Have a bloody good time and enjoy it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 20/10/16 11:25:23]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If a guy is not happy meeting you in a public place first, you have to question the reasons why.... and then question whether its right to meet him at all.

safety is top priority too many weirdo's about.

Perhaps it's more a case of you've ben lucky. Everybody who gets attacked always says "I never thought it would happen to me".

There are weirdos in society. Unfortunately the lure of Internet meeting, especially on a sex orientated site often attracts them.

Every single person male or female and couples actually should be careful until trust has been earned.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Public meeting is not for everyone and it is fine to not want one, it is preferences and it is up to each one if they want one, but yes, it is a good idea to have one to see how the other person are.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If a guy is not happy meeting you in a public place first, you have to question the reasons why.... and then question whether its right to meet him at all.

safety is top priority too many weirdo's about.

ummm yes there are

i know women who have been raped or been very close to being attacked and one who was murdered by a guy she was dating who she met on pof

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not wrong at all, that's what I'd expect when it's a first meet.

But most guys don't seem to be happy with a social meet only, from what my Mrs has told me, they expect a blow job at least

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

wise woman - is what most would do to be safe

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman
over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!

"If a guy is not happy meeting you in a public place first, you have to question the reasons why.... and then question whether its right to meet him at all.

safety is top priority too many weirdo's about.

Perhaps it's more a case of you've ben lucky. Everybody who gets attacked always says "I never thought it would happen to me".

There are weirdos in society. Unfortunately the lure of Internet meeting, especially on a sex orientated site often attracts them.

Every single person male or female and couples actually should be careful until trust has been earned."

It's not a case of thinking it won't happen to me,I'm sure I am lucky. I don't meet much to be fair and I'm sure the chances of meeting some lunatic are pretty high if I met more. I realise the need to be cautious obviously but if I worried to much then as a single woman I wouldn't be on here. We all do thing's differently,I don't do any of the things you advice.

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman
over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!

"If a guy is not happy meeting you in a public place first, you have to question the reasons why.... and then question whether its right to meet him at all.

safety is top priority too many weirdo's about.

ummm yes there are

i know women who have been raped or been very close to being attacked and one who was murdered by a guy she was dating who she met on pof"

but that happen anywhere can't it. We've all heard the horror stories,if someone is a twat then they're a twat,whether you initially meet them on here or in a pub.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No.

Next question?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If a guy is not happy meeting you in a public place first, you have to question the reasons why.... and then question whether its right to meet him at all."

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman
over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!

"If a guy is not happy meeting you in a public place first, you have to question the reasons why.... and then question whether its right to meet him at all.

safety is top priority too many weirdo's about.

Perhaps it's more a case of you've ben lucky. Everybody who gets attacked always says "I never thought it would happen to me".

There are weirdos in society. Unfortunately the lure of Internet meeting, especially on a sex orientated site often attracts them.

Every single person male or female and couples actually should be careful until trust has been earned.

Oh that's a lie actually I didnt read them properly,I do meet in a social place (most of the time).

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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

Hope it goes well. I usually go to a Costa as that way in doesn't matter if they turn up or not.

Take on board the advice given above.

Don't be afraid to tell them you don't want to meet again either. It's not always a definite that you'll get on.

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By *eesideMan
over a year ago

margate sumwear by the sea

Nothing rong with a social 1st.

In fact I insist on a social 1st with my meets to.

But mabey that's y I've had no luck...hoo nows ?....o well im not changing it lol

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

you are never wrong in making the decisions that suit you best, frankly anyone who has an issue and wont accept your choices may be best left to one side..

personal safety is paramount..

enjoy the meet..

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By *ild-1 OP Woman
over a year ago

york

Funnily enough he isn't so keen to meet now! ...... next

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never lose the element of control in your encounters through fab; do what you feel comfortable doing. A fab meet is where two people (or more

) agree to meet each other in person; it should be done where all parties feel mutually comfortable; anyone asking you to move outside your comfort zone should be avoided.

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By *ild-1 OP Woman
over a year ago

york

Thanks I am going to avoid xx

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