FabSwingers.com forum: The Fab Fantasy Bordello

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Inspired by a couple of other threads, I'm opening up a Fab brothel.

To make the business a success I need some employees and some customers.

Who's up to come join me in the red room and sell their wares, and who's buying?

So JUST FOR FUN (no *real* commercial transactions here, mods!

) what's your price or how much are you prepared to pay?

Keep it light-hearted and play nicely with each other!

I'll be the 'Madam' of the house taking a cut from everyone else as nobody would want to pay for me!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I just work at the bar, Dan? I'd like to watch it all from a safe place

I'll wear my bestest lingerie

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

"Can I just work at the bar, Dan? I'd like to watch it all from a safe place

I'll wear my bestest lingerie

I'll hand out nibbles and collect glasses.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Can I just work at the bar, Dan? I'd like to watch it all from a safe place

I'll wear my bestest lingerie

As long as you're flirting with the customers and they're racking up a bar bill in the hundreds it's all good with me!

The bouncers are on hand to march the unsuspecting punters under threat of violence to the nearest cashpoint after they realise drinks are £30 a pop x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Please can I be the Lap Dancer...I'm learning how to do it properly so it will give me chance to practice. Private Room Sessions only and I'll wear whatever the customer desires

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

D'ya need a fluffer?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can make some mean cocktails and was a pretty good waitress once upon a time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I be the one that you pay extra for to sit in the corner and watch

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Need anyone on the door?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Need anyone on the door?

With your current flowing locks surely you'll be the 'in demand' Dame that people will cross county lines just to visit?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm happyytonkeep the fire burning to keep you all warm. In fact, for free coffee, I can poke it all night if you want.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ill be the glass collector as long as I can watch from a distance

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd stand on the door to decide who comes in!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry but I just thought of this

Start Wearing Purple by Gogol Bordello

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_6IJfo4q1zk

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

The good news is we're well stocked now for bar and general housekeeping staff.

And a lapdancer (no touching - even in private rooms and if mangement hear that private 'extras' are on offer there will be hell to play!

)

But we definitely need more ladies, and gentlemen, 'hostesses' or 'hosts' to bring a smile to the clientele's faces

And punters, what are you offering even if it's non-financial in exchange for an hour of a hostesses company?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd stand on the door to decide who comes in!"

Tape measure in hand of course?

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By *exysuzi and Mr.SCouple
over a year ago

CONISTON .Stoke Suburbia. Staffs. BARMOUTH. The Lakes (Monthly)

Sounds quiet in here at the moment.

Oh wait.

In bounces Suzi, loud n proud. A small bundle of energy.

Now let's get this party started

xxxxxx Suzi

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By *randMrs Spanish BrunetteCouple
over a year ago

home sweet home

I like dancing. Can I be a go-go girl?

Hubby could be security

MrsSB

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll be master of the red room and I'll administer to those who are naughty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd stand on the door to decide who comes in!

Tape measure in hand of course?"
is that a sky remote

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

$5 and me love you long time licky licky sucky sucky

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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

I can sit in the corner and play lounge jazz on the piano for tips. Classy bordello.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll do you an awesome spreadsheet and source funding for your expansion plans. And refuse expenses claims like a motherfucker.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'll do you an awesome spreadsheet and source funding for your expansion plans. And refuse expenses claims like a motherfucker."

Whatever, I'm claiming my vibrating butt plug. And you can't stop me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I be the lifeguard / towel provider at the hot tub area...you can never be too careful around wet areas...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'll do you an awesome spreadsheet and source funding for your expansion plans. And refuse expenses claims like a motherfucker.

Whatever, I'm claiming my vibrating butt plug. And you can't stop me.

Not if it wasn't procured through the proper channels

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I could serve drinks and nibbles

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By *randMrs Spanish BrunetteCouple
over a year ago

home sweet home

"I could serve drinks and nibbles

Can I nibble your butt?

MrsSB

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I could serve drinks and nibbles

Can I nibble your butt?

MrsSB

"
please do . But be gentle with me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll provide my Snake Oil free of charge. It's very good for the complexion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well it looks like being the shittest brothel ever with no actual sex. Typical of the forum

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well it looks like being the shittest brothel ever with no actual sex. Typical of the forum

Okay I'll do it but I can't see Dan making much unless he can sell me by the pound

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I ain't paying for it

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By *oddyWoman
over a year ago

between havant and chichester

Ile make the steak buttys and fish finger buttys

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Well it looks like being the shittest brothel ever with no actual sex. Typical of the forum

It's typical - I can't even score in a brothel FFS!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Will do most things for biscuits

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

I'll pole dance if you like

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well it looks like being the shittest brothel ever with no actual sex. Typical of the forum

It's typical - I can't even score in a brothel FFS!

At this rate it's an overpriced bar

....nice try though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm in if you offer a nice cup of tea and an attractive partner for rude Scrabble...

I don't want to stay out too late though.

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

Is there any sex going on? If you have a rotating bed I'm on it

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By *eforfuncplCouple
over a year ago

Morecambe

Beds a spinning lol

I'll work for free lol xxx

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By *oddyWoman
over a year ago

between havant and chichester

"Is there any sex going on? If you have a rotating bed I'm on it

"
It was a water bed but someone has punchtered it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is there any sex going on? If you have a rotating bed I'm on it

A lazy Susan? Interesting...

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By *iSTARessWoman
over a year ago

London

I'll administer the kinky stuff.

But I'm very expensive.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'll administer the kinky stuff.

But I'm very expensive. "

Totally worth it.

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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

"I'll administer the kinky stuff.

But I'm very expensive.

Totally worth it.

Plus you can come and sit on my piano and sing.

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By *aughty_amazonWoman
over a year ago

BRISTOL

Hell yeah if fags on the door I'll be a Ho. They'll all be fit with massive cocks Pmsl

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'll administer the kinky stuff.

But I'm very expensive.

Totally worth it.

Plus you can come and sit on my piano and sing."

That's what you're calling it these days....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll do the fucking and sucking, someone has to bring in the punters

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'll do the fucking and sucking, someone has to bring in the punters

I'll bring my sex pants!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'll do the fucking and sucking, someone has to bring in the punters

I'll bring my sex pants! "

Your electric ones?

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By *iSTARessWoman
over a year ago

London

"I'll administer the kinky stuff.

But I'm very expensive.

Totally worth it.

Plus you can come and sit on my piano and sing."

Aah yes

Have vagina, can multi task

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As I can multi-task and inbetween the Lap Dancing, I'd like to offer my services at the Glory Hole. Would that bring in some extra punters???

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

"I can sit in the corner and play lounge jazz on the piano for tips. Classy bordello."

I do like a bit of jazz

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