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How to improve a sleepy libido?

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By *ureTemptation OP   Woman
over a year ago

Off the grid

Ok. Bored of reading how women who don't put out are asking for their husbands to leave them.

Fed up of being asked why aim tired all the time.

I would officially like someone to tell me what the hell I have to do to want sex more?

Answers on a postcard.

(Unfortunately due to the nature of this competition, no postcards can be returned.)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you are sleepy its so diffcult to get aroused. Not sure if its the same for women. Last night I tried to masturbate on more than one occasion when i woke only 3.5hrs after I fell asleep. Do you think I could even muster a sensation? nope. Nothing. On any other day .. when I am not tired it takes me minutes to cum.

So I dont the answer for a sleepy libido. Maybe only have sex when you are wide awake.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 11/10/16 19:04:16]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I misunderstood the question, sorry!

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

It may be worth asking your GP to check your B12 and Vit D levels. Both are very common deficiencies and often the culprit of what you describe.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"Ok. Bored of reading how women who don't put out are asking for their husbands to leave them.

Fed up of being asked why aim tired all the time.

I would officially like someone to tell me what the hell I have to do to want sex more?

Answers on a postcard.

(Unfortunately due to the nature of this competition, no postcards can be returned.)"

Has your doc checked your thyroid function??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There could be a fair few reasons you are not in the mood. Is it a new thing or something that has always been?

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales

Tiredness is a big factor, I used to drive 8-10 hours a day walk indoors at sixish be asleep by sevenish H would let me sleep, watch TV then wake me up to go to bed A lot of the time I couldn't be bothered for anything just too tired..

Answer, change jobs...solved

S

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I recently got on a health kick, lost weight, got fitter and I feel better on all counts. My libido is higher and I feel more awake and positive generally. I used to fall asleep on the sofa at 9 most nights, now not at all. It's amazing what small changes can do

Beard

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Ok. Bored of reading how women who don't put out are asking for their husbands to leave them.

Fed up of being asked why aim tired all the time.

I would officially like someone to tell me what the hell I have to do to want sex more?

Answers on a postcard.

(Unfortunately due to the nature of this competition, no postcards can be returned.)

Has your doc checked your thyroid function??"

I second that.

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By *ureTemptation OP   Woman
over a year ago

Off the grid

Thyroid normal. I take the supplements suggested.

Been like this since marriage/kids.

I think it's a combination of reasons and I'm not sure there's any quick and/or permanent fix to any of them.

I can't get rid of the kids. So I'm told anyway. It's definitely frowned upon.

I'm always tired by the end of the day and that's the only opportunity we get for sex.

Husband has switched jobs around so he often works on the weekend and has a day or two off in the week. That's helped a bit but realistically I have stuff to do during the day, and he always seems to see these days off as sex days. And is always a minimum of mildly disappointed if sex doesn't appear.

I'm way beyond even knowing what I want in bed. To roll over and go to sleep possibly? ??

So sex is mostly about what my husband wants because I can't tell him what I want because I don't know really.

I like flirting with other guys, that's always been a turn on. And that can help a bit. Plus he loves to see me with other guys.

I don't know, its lack of energy that's the underlying factor in all of this.

My doctor doesn't seem that interested.

I might go back and see him. See what he says.

I do agree a bit about fitness. I need to do some, but I'm slightly worried it will just make me more tired in the short- term, at least!

I've always been tired. I do have chronic illness stuff going on but nothing major?

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"Ok. Bored of reading how women who don't put out are asking for their husbands to leave them.

Fed up of being asked why aim tired all the time.

I would officially like someone to tell me what the hell I have to do to want sex more?

Answers on a postcard.

(Unfortunately due to the nature of this competition, no postcards can be returned.)

Has your doc checked your thyroid function??"

This. An under active thyroid can lead to tiredness and who wants sex when they want sleep? You can dream about it when you're asleep instead. Seriously though, daytime tiredness for apparent reason (as opposed to sports etc) is, ironically, a wake up call. See your doc.

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By *horltzMan
over a year ago

heysham

This comment will be of no help whatsoever but , I always get the horn when I'm tired

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Make sure they check your T3 and TSH as well as the usual T4 levels. For some reason you have to ask for them to check the whole thyroid function instead of just T4. Good luck x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Op do you feel appreciated ?

Has your confidence maybe took a beating both mentally or physically ?

Sounds to me ( im no expert )

You do sound a bit down ?

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By *ureTemptation OP   Woman
over a year ago

Off the grid


"Make sure they check your T3 and TSH as well as the usual T4 levels. For some reason you have to ask for them to check the whole thyroid function instead of just T4. Good luck x"

Is that what I have to ask for? I've just been googling and I have a TON of symptoms for hypothyroidism.

But the test came back normal. Apparently the standard blood test can miss a lot of cases.

My brain is in permanent fog. Hate feeling like this.

Will try and get an appointment asap. Thanks guys.

(And yep, husband really does worship the ground I walk on. He's lovely and helps me loads round the house. He was up at 5am for work, and came in after a long day and looked after the kids and cooked dinner as I'm wiped out. Again. But my tiredness grinds us both down after a while. It's not easy for either of us.)

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Good, regular rest and sleep are essential as well as stress busting. We're all unique but pursuing satisfaction of our core needs is important. Mastet your nutrition, rest and health as well as you're able.

Trying to force libido is often self-defeating - pushing natural desires away.

Whilst pressure doesn't really help, you can add lots of touching and intimacy, so that your body is not isolated from other people.

Hang out with friends who have high sexual energy levels, if it's not a pressure.

Sometimes we just need to pace ourselves and be ready for the right point.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

You are approaching middle age ( sos x ) and the menopause will be looming soon.

You have children, a house , a husband.

I don't know if you have a job.

Punch my lights out if you wish but I pick up that your sex life is like a wank. It's just there for relief.

It needs livening up where your needs are put first at times. Where you both do something different like going out somewhere you've never been before.

Surprising each other is a great turn on.

No matter how much you love each other fucking every Tuesday at 6.45 , starting and ending each sex session in the same way ........ and saying same time next week is enough to make anyone feel there's no fucking point.

It gets to be another duty to perform between the dishes and the shopping list.

Am I way off the mark ?

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

The brain fog could be a grain/gluten thing. If you are B12 deficient, it can't be supplemented orally, it's treated with injections every three months.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ask to see another Dr if you're not getting much help off your usual one. Some think of things that others don't and they do a different set of tests and bingo!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Op were you on here before as CHW? I think we chatted if so.

I have a chronic illness too and sometimes my sex drive is none existent, at the moment it's ok tho. Exercise helped, a lor

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By *egasus NobMan
over a year ago

Merton

Binge on porn works. I told myself I will focus on life and the goals I set for myself not going to masturbate or have sex. So I did for a couple of months and my sex drive went away, got worried for a few days then binged on porn and my libido came back.

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford

I hesitate to reccomend excercise, but will do so with the following caveat. IF you are otherwise healthy (thyrid, vitamin deficiencies etc all OK), then it can be the answer. It really does give you more energy even though you might think that it won't because you are currently tired.

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By *ureTemptation OP   Woman
over a year ago

Off the grid


"Op were you on here before as CHW? I think we chatted if so.

I have a chronic illness too and sometimes my sex drive is none existent, at the moment it's ok tho. Exercise helped, a lor "

Yep that's me.

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By *ureTemptation OP   Woman
over a year ago

Off the grid


"I hesitate to reccomend excercise, but will do so with the following caveat. IF you are otherwise healthy (thyrid, vitamin deficiencies etc all OK), then it can be the answer. It really does give you more energy even though you might think that it won't because you are currently tired. "

Ok. You lie underneath me and I will do press ups. That could motivate me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The more some wanks, the more the libido will increase, because it is the same as sex as both ends with an orgasm

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Thyroid normal. I take the supplements suggested.

Been like this since marriage/kids.

I think it's a combination of reasons and I'm not sure there's any quick and/or permanent fix to any of them.

I can't get rid of the kids. So I'm told anyway. It's definitely frowned upon.

I'm always tired by the end of the day and that's the only opportunity we get for sex.

Husband has switched jobs around so he often works on the weekend and has a day or two off in the week. That's helped a bit but realistically I have stuff to do during the day, and he always seems to see these days off as sex days. And is always a minimum of mildly disappointed if sex doesn't appear.

I'm way beyond even knowing what I want in bed. To roll over and go to sleep possibly? ??

So sex is mostly about what my husband wants because I can't tell him what I want because I don't know really.

I like flirting with other guys, that's always been a turn on. And that can help a bit. Plus he loves to see me with other guys.

I don't know, its lack of energy that's the underlying factor in all of this.

My doctor doesn't seem that interested.

I might go back and see him. See what he says.

I do agree a bit about fitness. I need to do some, but I'm slightly worried it will just make me more tired in the short- term, at least!

I've always been tired. I do have chronic illness stuff going on but nothing major? "
what supplement????????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rather than hubby just expecting sex to happen because you have a window of time with no kids have either of you tried to get each other wound up leading up to the event? Text sex,flirting, even a butt touch as you're loading the dishwasher can go a long way to getting you in the mood.

I really struggle if I'm expected to perform just because this is the time we have to get this done. My libido expects wooing as I get older otherwise it would rather just sleep

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The more some wanks, the more the libido will increase, because it is the same as sex as both ends with an orgasm "

Very true. The body likes to be stimulated, if it isn't, then the sexual energy lies dormant or is used in other ways.

Try a Tantric massage to reset your sexual energy and rediscover your erogenius zones.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The more some wanks, the more the libido will increase, because it is the same as sex as both ends with an orgasm

Very true. The body likes to be stimulated, if it isn't, then the sexual energy lies dormant or is used in other ways.

Try a Tantric massage to reset your sexual energy and rediscover your erogenius zones. "
my qu....massage anybody?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The more some wanks, the more the libido will increase, because it is the same as sex as both ends with an orgasm

Very true. The body likes to be stimulated, if it isn't, then the sexual energy lies dormant or is used in other ways.

Try a Tantric massage to reset your sexual energy and rediscover your erogenius zones. "

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