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Lack of etiquette

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Heres where I sound like an old fart i think - when i first joined years ago on my first profile there was a sense of humour in the chatrooms - now its a complete zoo. Messages were answered with a polite no thanks or a please tell me more ( if you were lucky)

Now theres no reply and a block in lots of cases - a block used to be used to get rid of people who harass now its a filter.

I ventured into the chatroom in the week and was chatting happily to a nice lady and received a private message from a random guy ' you're a fucking nob!! ' im assuming from he got a no thanks and didnt like it.

So the point of the rambling whinge is - do you think that if this was a pay site many of these wankers ( i use that term on the evidence of most cams in the rooms) would crawl back under the stines that they came out of or actually pay to use the site? And - sadly im not finished . Do you think the general standard of behaviour would improve if they had to pay?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Heres where I sound like an old fart i think - when i first joined years ago on my first profile there was a sense of humour in the chatrooms - now its a complete zoo. Messages were answered with a polite no thanks or a please tell me more ( if you were lucky)

Now theres no reply and a block in lots of cases - a block used to be used to get rid of people who harass now its a filter.

I ventured into the chatroom in the week and was chatting happily to a nice lady and received a private message from a random guy ' you're a fucking nob!! ' im assuming from he got a no thanks and didnt like it.

So the point of the rambling whinge is - do you think that if this was a pay site many of these wankers ( i use that term on the evidence of most cams in the rooms) would crawl back under the stines that they came out of or actually pay to use the site? And - sadly im not finished . Do you think the general standard of behaviour would improve if they had to pay? "

Maybe.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

No they wouldn't

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

The ability to pay isn't related to the standard of social interaction someone has. People with wealth can often be rude bastards and poverty stricken souls can be as polite as a saucepan.

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By *enard ArgenteMan
over a year ago

London and France

No; if anything worse ;

Since once paid; there becomes an entitlement ( in some peoples' minds).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Paying won't get rid of the eejits, i avoid the chat rooms cause it is full of wankers

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The ability to pay isn't related to the standard of social interaction someone has. People with wealth can often be rude bastards and poverty stricken souls can be as polite as a saucepan. "

My point there us there is a financial penalty to getting banned from site whereas they now get banned and create a new profile ir have 10 on the go at once and jump from ond to the other freely.

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By *ustfortonightMan
over a year ago

Kent

Surely it would get worse.

From what I've heard the sense of entitlement is bad enough already, imagine how bad it would be if they had to pay.

I think it's fine how it is, free to use with payment for optional extras.

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By *litheroevoyeurMan
over a year ago

Clitheroe

Around 40% (at the last count)of chatroom users are site supporters so I don't think a mandatory fee would change anything.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've seen this several times...make this a pay site, thought it was already? Yes I know you can join free but to be able to interact then you have to pay, no?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I've seen this several times...make this a pay site, thought it was already? Yes I know you can join free but to be able to interact then you have to pay, no? "

No dont think so - only pay gor extras

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"I've seen this several times...make this a pay site, thought it was already? Yes I know you can join free but to be able to interact then you have to pay, no? "

No, people like me pay so some people don't have to. All contact is free, paying or not. It's a special thing about this site so should be considered a privilege.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The ability to pay isn't related to the standard of social interaction someone has. People with wealth can often be rude bastards and poverty stricken souls can be as polite as a saucepan. "

I couldn't have put this better myself.

Unfortunately due to the "walkers" I myself use the block button far too readily, however rarely unless they have messaged several times and really not got the point.

I use ignore messages as a default for not interested, if I replied politely to each inbox I would spend much of my time either receiving "thankyous" or "whys".

On my previous profile I took the time to reply to each message with a courteous "thankyou for your message, but no thanks. Happy swinging "

This however took up so much time that I lost the ability to speak to people I genuinely felt compatible with.

I don't see myself as rude, just wise x

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By *uperGuy68Man
over a year ago

Southampton


"The ability to pay isn't related to the standard of social interaction someone has. People with wealth can often be rude bastards and poverty stricken souls can be as polite as a saucepan. "

Nothing polite about my saucepans, they're always boiling over!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I go in chat I do it to get naked and wank off with a guy. I get tons of pms and I only answer the ones I want to. I'm there to cum, not to say "no thanks" to every shadow profile that messages me.

If people had to pay I don't think I'd ever go in chat. I could just imagine what many people would think they were entitled to if they had paid to be there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Haha! Wankers not walkers....Sorry too much Walking dead

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"When I go in chat I do it to get naked and wank off with a guy. I get tons of pms and I only answer the ones I want to. I'm there to cum, not to say "no thanks" to every shadow profile that messages me.

If people had to pay I don't think I'd ever go in chat. I could just imagine what many people would think they were entitled to if they had paid to be there."

When ya'll on cam next?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, wankers and the folk you refer to, have money as well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The ability to pay isn't related to the standard of social interaction someone has. People with wealth can often be rude bastards and poverty stricken souls can be as polite as a saucepan. "

Money does not make the Man!

We are not paid up members, don't believe that the behaviour of those in the chat rooms would change too much, it's the nature of the beast.

Do believe that there would be far less members on the site, would it improve the quality? Please refer to first point.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The ability to pay isn't related to the standard of social interaction someone has. People with wealth can often be rude bastards and poverty stricken souls can be as polite as a saucepan.

I couldn't have put this better myself.

Unfortunately due to the "walkers" I myself use the block button far too readily, however rarely unless they have messaged several times and really not got the point.

I use ignore messages as a default for not interested, if I replied politely to each inbox I would spend much of my time either receiving "thankyous" or "whys".

On my previous profile I took the time to reply to each message with a courteous "thankyou for your message, but no thanks. Happy swinging "

This however took up so much time that I lost the ability to speak to people I genuinely felt compatible with.

I don't see myself as rude, just wise x"

Might be a potential to have a default thanks but no thanks tick box on messages which then ignores all further messages - one tick does the lot

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The ability to pay isn't related to the standard of social interaction someone has. People with wealth can often be rude bastards and poverty stricken souls can be as polite as a saucepan.

I couldn't have put this better myself.

Unfortunately due to the "walkers" I myself use the block button far too readily, however rarely unless they have messaged several times and really not got the point.

I use ignore messages as a default for not interested, if I replied politely to each inbox I would spend much of my time either receiving "thankyous" or "whys".

On my previous profile I took the time to reply to each message with a courteous "thankyou for your message, but no thanks. Happy swinging "

This however took up so much time that I lost the ability to speak to people I genuinely felt compatible with.

I don't see myself as rude, just wise x

Might be a potential to have a default thanks but no thanks tick box on messages which then ignores all further messages - one tick does the lot "

I like this idea, especially if they then can't reply.

However you know people will then moan about the default setting and class it as not personal

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"When I go in chat I do it to get naked and wank off with a guy. I get tons of pms and I only answer the ones I want to. I'm there to cum, not to say "no thanks" to every shadow profile that messages me.

If people had to pay I don't think I'd ever go in chat. I could just imagine what many people would think they were entitled to if they had paid to be there.

When ya'll on cam next? "

Every once in a while

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The ability to pay isn't related to the standard of social interaction someone has. People with wealth can often be rude bastards and poverty stricken souls can be as polite as a saucepan.

I couldn't have put this better myself.

Unfortunately due to the "walkers" I myself use the block button far too readily, however rarely unless they have messaged several times and really not got the point.

I use ignore messages as a default for not interested, if I replied politely to each inbox I would spend much of my time either receiving "thankyous" or "whys".

On my previous profile I took the time to reply to each message with a courteous "thankyou for your message, but no thanks. Happy swinging "

This however took up so much time that I lost the ability to speak to people I genuinely felt compatible with.

I don't see myself as rude, just wise x

Might be a potential to have a default thanks but no thanks tick box on messages which then ignores all further messages - one tick does the lot

I like this idea, especially if they then can't reply.

However you know people will then moan about the default setting and class it as not personal "

I think at thst point its tough - - you been told - not blocked and all other messaging is ignored so you wouldnt see them foaming at. The mouth and smashing their keyboard

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales

I still think everyone should pay to join, say £25 but it is on the proviso that if you are still here in three months you get it back, the surplus can go towards funding the site in the first place.

This may not get rid of the arrogant but it would deter to at least some extent the late night joiners, the here today gone tomorrow merchants & probably many of the fakes, especially if you stipulated "If proved to be a fake you will be banned & money not refunded..

Doubt that bits legal, but might be..

S

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I still think everyone should pay to join, say £25 but it is on the proviso that if you are still here in three months you get it back, the surplus can go towards funding the site in the first place.

This may not get rid of the arrogant but it would deter to at least some extent the late night joiners, the here today gone tomorrow merchants & probably many of the fakes, especially if you stipulated "If proved to be a fake you will be banned & money not refunded..

Doubt that bits legal, but might be..

S"

Would help with card verification - at present anyone including 14 year old spotty kids could join as theres no verification of age. If they did card veri and someone got banned they could block the card number so user would have to Use a different card to set up new account - soon run out of cards or stop being a pain in the arse just a thought.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Heres where I sound like an old fart i think - when i first joined years ago on my first profile there was a sense of humour in the chatrooms - now its a complete zoo. Messages were answered with a polite no thanks or a please tell me more ( if you were lucky)

Now theres no reply and a block in lots of cases - a block used to be used to get rid of people who harass now its a filter.

I ventured into the chatroom in the week and was chatting happily to a nice lady and received a private message from a random guy ' you're a fucking nob!! ' im assuming from he got a no thanks and didnt like it.

So the point of the rambling whinge is - do you think that if this was a pay site many of these wankers ( i use that term on the evidence of most cams in the rooms) would crawl back under the stines that they came out of or actually pay to use the site? And - sadly im not finished . Do you think the general standard of behaviour would improve if they had to pay? "

I would hazard a guess that years ago the site was relatively new and unheard of amongst the vanilla world and wasn't so easy to find. The site now is far more commercialised, and as such the more people that join, the more word spreads of it and gets around and more and more people join, (after all, you can pretty much say that's what the business plan of the site operates on), making it less personalised and as such generally desensitises the user.

I for instance first learned of the site from a work colleague who had no idea we were swingers, she was very open about it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Heres where I sound like an old fart i think - when i first joined years ago on my first profile there was a sense of humour in the chatrooms - now its a complete zoo. Messages were answered with a polite no thanks or a please tell me more ( if you were lucky)

Now theres no reply and a block in lots of cases - a block used to be used to get rid of people who harass now its a filter.

I ventured into the chatroom in the week and was chatting happily to a nice lady and received a private message from a random guy ' you're a fucking nob!! ' im assuming from he got a no thanks and didnt like it.

So the point of the rambling whinge is - do you think that if this was a pay site many of these wankers ( i use that term on the evidence of most cams in the rooms) would crawl back under the stines that they came out of or actually pay to use the site? And - sadly im not finished . Do you think the general standard of behaviour would improve if they had to pay?

I would hazard a guess that years ago the site was relatively new and unheard of amongst the vanilla world and wasn't so easy to find. The site now is far more commercialised, and as such the more people that join, the more word spreads of it and gets around and more and more people join, (after all, you can pretty much say that's what the business plan of the site operates on), making it less personalised and as such generally desensitises the user.

I for instance first learned of the site from a work colleague who had no idea we were swingers, she was very open about it. "

I want a job at your place!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Heres where I sound like an old fart i think - when i first joined years ago on my first profile there was a sense of humour in the chatrooms - now its a complete zoo. Messages were answered with a polite no thanks or a please tell me more ( if you were lucky)

Now theres no reply and a block in lots of cases - a block used to be used to get rid of people who harass now its a filter.

I ventured into the chatroom in the week and was chatting happily to a nice lady and received a private message from a random guy ' you're a fucking nob!! ' im assuming from he got a no thanks and didnt like it.

So the point of the rambling whinge is - do you think that if this was a pay site many of these wankers ( i use that term on the evidence of most cams in the rooms) would crawl back under the stines that they came out of or actually pay to use the site? And - sadly im not finished . Do you think the general standard of behaviour would improve if they had to pay? "

No

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By *obbytupperMan
over a year ago

Menston near Ilkley


"I still think everyone should pay to join, say £25 but it is on the proviso that if you are still here in three months you get it back, the surplus can go towards funding the site in the first place.

This may not get rid of the arrogant but it would deter to at least some extent the late night joiners, the here today gone tomorrow merchants & probably many of the fakes, especially if you stipulated "If proved to be a fake you will be banned & money not refunded..

Doubt that bits legal, but might be..

S"

Some would not be able to afford the £25 you suggest, though are genuine. The idiots would still pay and be arseholes. The block button is a good tool.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

If people are not happy with fab why dont they pay to join s site they are happy with. Plenty of paid sites out there

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

An interesting point someone made ( ive enjoyed reading everyones thoughts so far) is to do with entitlement - because I never considered myself entitled to anything on here - it never crossed my mind - it would explain the behaviour of some ive come across and their attitudes to others on here - a combination of the , stupidity, arrogance & ignorance - it has to be said thst the forums do restore my faith in genuine swingers however.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If people are not happy with fab why dont they pay to join s site they are happy with. Plenty of paid sites out there"

I think my point was to try and ensure its a fun environment for people - ive known so many that have left because of the bad behaviour - - its a real shame as they are the genuine swingers.

Im a member on another site where the membership is paid and generally the behaviour is better - someone else mentioned the profile of swinging and this site (which has been in the press more than others) and i think that may have a lot to do with it the here today gone tomorrow members. Lots of really good points being made here

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By *inzi LTV/TS
over a year ago

The Garden of Eden in Beautiful North Wales

As you mentioned in your OP, block those that harass or are just plain rude.

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By *elma and ShaggyCouple
over a year ago

Bedworth

The site provides plenty of tools that we can use to reduce interaction with the numpties, we just have to utilise them.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Paying seems to give some an even bigger sense of entitlement. I don't think that's going to improve communication.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Only on this site could someone called hughspunktrumpet be complaining about etiquette

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Only on this site could someone called hughspunktrumpet be complaining about etiquette "

I'll have you know there were Spunktrumpets at the Battle Of Hastings, Agincourt, Wars of The Roses, The Somme, - i come from a long line of spunkttumpets some are decorated!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Heres where I sound like an old fart i think - when i first joined years ago on my first profile there was a sense of humour in the chatrooms - now its a complete zoo. Messages were answered with a polite no thanks or a please tell me more ( if you were lucky)

Now theres no reply and a block in lots of cases - a block used to be used to get rid of people who harass now its a filter.

I ventured into the chatroom in the week and was chatting happily to a nice lady and received a private message from a random guy ' you're a fucking nob!! ' im assuming from he got a no thanks and didnt like it.

So the point of the rambling whinge is - do you think that if this was a pay site many of these wankers ( i use that term on the evidence of most cams in the rooms) would crawl back under the stines that they came out of or actually pay to use the site? And - sadly im not finished . Do you think the general standard of behaviour would improve if they had to pay? "

Reality check - you're not a paying member yourself so your rant is irrelevant old man

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Heres where I sound like an old fart i think - when i first joined years ago on my first profile there was a sense of humour in the chatrooms - now its a complete zoo. Messages were answered with a polite no thanks or a please tell me more ( if you were lucky)

Now theres no reply and a block in lots of cases - a block used to be used to get rid of people who harass now its a filter.

I ventured into the chatroom in the week and was chatting happily to a nice lady and received a private message from a random guy ' you're a fucking nob!! ' im assuming from he got a no thanks and didnt like it.

So the point of the rambling whinge is - do you think that if this was a pay site many of these wankers ( i use that term on the evidence of most cams in the rooms) would crawl back under the stines that they came out of or actually pay to use the site? And - sadly im not finished . Do you think the general standard of behaviour would improve if they had to pay? "

Paying would probably make it worse in my opinion. The rude arrogant people would think just because they pay they have rights to get what they want.

As for chat rooms I always turn pm off if I wanna chat to someone then I'll pm them if their pm is off I politely ask them if they would like to chat x

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

No.

The semi-anonymous internet helps fuel poor behaviour on pretty much any site, paid or not.

It's better to have more users to find the right partners from than fewer. Admin help filter the dross, we users do the rest.

Just behave as you expect and appreciate others doing. Blocking reduces potential for repetitive mistakes, when you know someone is inappropriate. It's not a cosy, local group of friends - it's a massive collection of thousands of people.

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