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"I just laughed out loud. I actually said that once Not because I have a flappy fanny before anyone says....he had a pencil cock. The guy thought it was hilarious and wanted to meet me again " And did you? You could have got him a girthy nobbled sleeve | |||
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"I just laughed out loud. I actually said that once Not because I have a flappy fanny before anyone says....he had a pencil cock. The guy thought it was hilarious and wanted to meet me again And did you? You could have got him a girthy nobbled sleeve I've missed you" Missed you too sweet cheeks ..... mwah | |||
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"I just laughed out loud. I actually said that once Not because I have a flappy fanny before anyone says....he had a pencil cock. The guy thought it was hilarious and wanted to meet me again And did you? You could have got him a girthy nobbled sleeve " Now that's just a cool idea!! Lol | |||
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"'If you cum inside me, I'll kill you' I was 17. I remember it clearly to this day. I decided I'll wait until I got some condoms. " Coward | |||
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"Someone elses name?" Your name said in the wrong way can be just as devastating... I imagine. | |||
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"Things you don't want to hear during sex " Not during but at 14 a boyfriend asked if I was ready for a stick up. | |||
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"I just laughed out loud. I actually said that once Not because I have a flappy fanny before anyone says....he had a pencil cock. The guy thought it was hilarious and wanted to meet me again And did you? You could have got him a girthy nobbled sleeve " No I didn't, he was a bit straight and I'm not talking about his cock this time sweet chap though. Nice to see you back xx | |||
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"Can I squeeze that spot ?" Yep. I can say for certain that kills the moment | |||
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""Is this your poo or mine?"" I only just had my brekkie Joe. | |||
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""Is this your poo or mine?" I only just had my brekkie Joe." Tee hee | |||
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"'You know I could kill you right now don't you?' Bit scary that " That. Is. Odd. | |||
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"oh I remember now. "you should lose weight" " I hope you slapped whoever said that | |||
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"another one "you fucking bitch, you fucking bitch" over and over as he came. " Oh sweet Jesus | |||
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"'Was that it?!' I said that once to a meet from here. Luckily we'd been talking long enough for him to realise it was a joke. His face was a picture at first though " That's just awful | |||
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"oh I remember now. "you should lose weight" I hope you slapped whoever said that " I dealt with him, yes. | |||
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"another one "you fucking bitch, you fucking bitch" over and over as he came. Oh sweet Jesus " Hahahaha. | |||
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"oh I remember now. "you should lose weight" " Or 'wow, your belly is getting big isn't it' courtesy of my lovely ex | |||
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"Cheering. GOAL because your team just scored on the TV " | |||
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""I'm just going to recite some poetry I've written..."" That's a bad thing to say? Damn. | |||
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"oh I remember now. "you should lose weight" Or 'wow, your belly is getting big isn't it' courtesy of my lovely ex " b a s t a r d | |||
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"oh I remember now. "you should lose weight" Or 'wow, your belly is getting big isn't it' courtesy of my lovely ex " Can't think why he's now an ex lol | |||
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"I just laughed out loud. I actually said that once Not because I have a flappy fanny before anyone says....he had a pencil cock. The guy thought it was hilarious and wanted to meet me again " Been there - met someone with a micro cock. I try and see a pic first now | |||
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"oh I remember now. "you should lose weight" Or 'wow, your belly is getting big isn't it' courtesy of my lovely ex b a s t a r d " Yea im glad he's out of my life | |||
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"oh I remember now. "you should lose weight" Or 'wow, your belly is getting big isn't it' courtesy of my lovely ex Can't think why he's now an ex lol" Its a mystery | |||
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"Was 10mins late for a meet and knocked on the door, she shouted come up. Playing on her own she was I get there she says am ready for you 5 mins later she came pussy pulsating and she said "that's it am done you can go now " " So that's why you never keep a lady waiting. Got it lol | |||
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"'If you cum inside me, I'll kill you' I was 17. I remember it clearly to this day. I decided I'll wait until I got some condoms. Coward " It was a game I was unwilling to play. During sex, I guarantee nothing! | |||
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"Fuck me from behind, Corrie's good tonight " I think staring into Norris's face would put me off my stroke. | |||
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"oh I remember now. "you should lose weight" Or 'wow, your belly is getting big isn't it' courtesy of my lovely ex " "shame I can't say the same about your dick!" You know that's what you should've said. It ended there surely. | |||
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"Jeez I think your piercing caught my coil threads. (True ouchy story)" Ouch | |||
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"I think the handbreak has just gone. Pretty sure we've started moving." Oops | |||
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"My old habit was to say to my husband "wait until the adverts, I'm watching this"" This must be a wife thing | |||
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"I think the handbreak has just gone. Pretty sure we've started moving. Oops " Oops was not the word. We were in the back seat of a car with pants round our ankles rolling backwards down a hill | |||
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"I think the handbreak has just gone. Pretty sure we've started moving. Oops Oops was not the word. We were in the back seat of a car with pants round our ankles rolling backwards down a hill " how did you get out of that situation | |||
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"I think the handbreak has just gone. Pretty sure we've started moving. Oops Oops was not the word. We were in the back seat of a car with pants round our ankles rolling backwards down a hill how did you get out of that situation " Luckily it hadn't gone completely so I threw myself between the seats and pulled on the handbreak as hard as I could and the Mrs got in the drivers seat and put it into 1st gear lol In the end only rolled back a few feet | |||
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""Have you ever considered voting for the Conservative Party?" " Don't mention them. They're at my workplace next week | |||
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"Sorry I just jizzed in your hair " Nooooooo. Worst nightmare | |||
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"I think the handbreak has just gone. Pretty sure we've started moving. Oops Oops was not the word. We were in the back seat of a car with pants round our ankles rolling backwards down a hill how did you get out of that situation Luckily it hadn't gone completely so I threw myself between the seats and pulled on the handbreak as hard as I could and the Mrs got in the drivers seat and put it into 1st gear lol In the end only rolled back a few feet " phew! Not too bad then | |||
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"Sorry I just jizzed in your hair Nooooooo. Worst nightmare " I know right! | |||
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"Sorry I just jizzed in your hair Nooooooo. Worst nightmare I know right! " No, no it isn't. "Errm, that's not my jizz" | |||
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"Sorry I just jizzed in your hair Nooooooo. Worst nightmare I know right! No, no it isn't. "Errm, that's not my jizz" " | |||
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"Ran out of condoms once and he went to put a used one back on!!! I was like it's ok, really it is.... " Oh god lol | |||
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""Is this your poo or mine?"" Think I'd rather hear the papa smurf line | |||
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"I went to a house for a meet. He asked if I would lay on the bed. When I did he said "that's my side. Can't you lay on the other side". During sex he said "my psoriasis is flaking off " Sally " Ewwwwwwwww!!!! | |||
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""Have you ever considered voting for the Conservative Party?" Don't mention them. They're at my workplace next week " Years ago we had a visit by john carlisle,very right wing tory,my bosses took one look at the sandinista t-shirt I was wearing and sent me for lunch break. No sense of humour | |||
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"Not yet but I'm tryin..... xxx" Ah the sound of one too many sherberts before hand | |||
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"Things you don't want to hear during sex " Excuse me but...... how long are you going to be ! This was said to me once | |||
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"Where's the condom? Whoops, still inside " That has happened to me more than once........... | |||
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""Do you actually know what your doing?" is one ive used And we have a code word for when a meet goes bad, have shouted it on the past, several times " I guess if you're ever asked that you're left with 2 answers. Sorry, no. Well I thought I did right up until you asked that | |||
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""Do you actually know what your doing?" is one ive used And we have a code word for when a meet goes bad, have shouted it on the past, several times " Just get off, I do a better job on my own True story- useless boy | |||
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"'Push it all the way in' how was I supposed to know that he was referring to his willy in my throat and not my finger in his bum must admit I did laugh when he squealed like a little girl " | |||
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"'Push it all the way in' how was I supposed to know that he was referring to his willy in my throat and not my finger in his bum must admit I did laugh when he squealed like a little girl " I like you more everyday | |||
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"'Push it all the way in' how was I supposed to know that he was referring to his willy in my throat and not my finger in his bum must admit I did laugh when he squealed like a little girl " OMG even I had to laugh at that!! | |||
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"'Push it all the way in' how was I supposed to know that he was referring to his willy in my throat and not my finger in his bum must admit I did laugh when he squealed like a little girl I like you more everyday " well the feeling is mutual as im sure you know by now | |||
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"'Push it all the way in' how was I supposed to know that he was referring to his willy in my throat and not my finger in his bum must admit I did laugh when he squealed like a little girl " Pmsl awesome!... I might have to try that on dax | |||
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"It's not a trough. Eat it properly or not at all. You are like a hog searching for truffles Yawning I got my kindle out once while they were down there " | |||
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"'Push it all the way in' how was I supposed to know that he was referring to his willy in my throat and not my finger in his bum must admit I did laugh when he squealed like a little girl Pmsl awesome!... I might have to try that on dax " I like it, sorry Dax | |||
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"'Push it all the way in' how was I supposed to know that he was referring to his willy in my throat and not my finger in his bum must admit I did laugh when he squealed like a little girl " Private note added. Be specific with requests | |||
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"'Push it all the way in' how was I supposed to know that he was referring to his willy in my throat and not my finger in his bum must admit I did laugh when he squealed like a little girl Private note added. Be specific with requests " You can never be too careful | |||
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