FabSwingers.com forum: "Nice guys"

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Being overly "nice" is a little too much, right?

Would you rather a man not lick your arse 24/7 with compliments and just be direct and a little "bad" sometimes?

There is nothing wrong with being nice and respectful for sure. However, it can only get you so far before it comes boring and borderline sad.

Is this were the "gentleman" card comes in? Nice, respectful and understanding. But doesn't come across too over the top and doesn't take shit?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's a fine line between being too nice & coming across as superficial.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I go for nice guy all day long.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am too nice I think. One of the words always used to describe me. A bit of bad gets the naughty girls I am concluding.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

there's nice where you are nice as opposed to being nasty and then there creepy sickly over nice which is just awful

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Too nice, not nice enough, too short a message, too long a message, not enough chat, too much chat.

The impossible world of FAB and in fact the world in general. Although it's a site ripe for adjusting your personality to get results, I aim for just being who I am, saying what I'd usually say and if I click, I click. If I get on with someone whilst acting differently chances are it'll be a rubbish meet in person.

Now I need a coffee immediately

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Would you rather a man not lick your arse 24/7 "

My mate ain't too bad at rimming actually

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We could name someone lol but best to just say a woman likes a man to be a man and vice versa in my humble opinion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There's a fine line between being too nice & coming across as superficial."

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

"Being overly "nice" is a little too much, right?

Would you rather a man not lick your arse 24/7 with compliments and just be direct and a little "bad" sometimes?

There is nothing wrong with being nice and respectful for sure. However, it can only get you so far before it comes boring and borderline sad.

Is this were the "gentleman" card comes in? Nice, respectful and understanding. But doesn't come across too over the top and doesn't take shit?

That last part

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It had been said I'm too nice. I'd rather someone say that than call me a cunt though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It had been said I'm too nice. I'd rather someone say that than call me a cunt though. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Be too nice and you can be sure ppl will walk all over you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Be too nice and you can be sure ppl will walk all over you. "

Some people like that

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Be too nice and you can be sure ppl will walk all over you. "

This is exactly what I mean.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Being overly "nice" is a little too much, right?

Would you rather a man not lick your arse 24/7 with compliments and just be direct and a little "bad" sometimes?

There is nothing wrong with being nice and respectful for sure. However, it can only get you so far before it comes boring and borderline sad.

Is this were the "gentleman" card comes in? Nice, respectful and understanding. But doesn't come across too over the top and doesn't take shit?

Trying to be nice as I realise I tend to have an angry streak which isn't a nice thing, trying to be nice is a difficult thing at times but im working on it and realise my faults

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Be too nice and you can be sure ppl will walk all over you. "

That's not always the case.

You can be nice and still stand your ground without being a "bad boy" or a cunt.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Be too nice and you can be sure ppl will walk all over you.

That's not always the case.

You can be nice and still stand your ground without being a "bad boy" or a cunt. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It had been said I'm too nice. I'd rather someone say that than call me a cunt though. "

Yep

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everyone's different, some like nice some like rude some just want attention of any variety

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Be too nice and you can be sure ppl will walk all over you.

That's not always the case.

You can be nice and still stand your ground without being a "bad boy" or a cunt.

Yes very true

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like to think of myself as a nice chap, a gentleman but with an ever so naughty streak

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I go for nice guy all day long. "

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

I would rather been seen as authentic, I can be nice and not so nice when I need to be.

Swinging can bring out the exploitative in people and I am no one's fool now.

That's from experience.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm an absolute knobhead but a likeable knobhead I like to think

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nice guys for me though not afraid to speak there minds when the need arises ohp plenty will take advance and walk all over you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Advantage is what i meant

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nice guys for me though not afraid to speak there minds when the need arises ohp plenty will take advance and walk all over you"

I think I disagree. You can politely and nicely say no. Nice doesn't mean being a yes man. Just not being a dickhead

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

with nice guys i always want to see if there's a wild man inside..

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Be too nice and you can be sure ppl will walk all over you.

That's not always the case.

You can be nice and still stand your ground without being a "bad boy" or a cunt. "

This is also what I mean. How do you not take shit with avoiding coming across like a bad boy or a cunt?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ejay, how do you see yourself?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nice guys for me though not afraid to speak there minds when the need arises ohp plenty will take advance and walk all over you

I think I disagree. You can politely and nicely say no. Nice doesn't mean being a yes man. Just not being a dickhead

i didnt say anything about being a yes man by speaking his mind i actually meant being assertive enough to say no etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I suppose it really depends on the individual's benchmark doesn't it?

I like nice - polite, listening, feedback, intuitive, strong, kind and thinking kinda fellow who can hold his own and say and do what he thinks....now that guy is NICE and has the sort of characteristics that are yummy to play with....

Mwah

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

"Advantage is what i meant"

I won't take advantage of you, we can call it love at 40-40

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 06/09/16 08:49:49]

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Ejay, how do you see yourself?"

I like to think I found a good balance between nice, polite and respectful but equally direct and upfront/honest.

It just got me thinking because I was told I was far "too nice" to meet from one person and another person said I was to much of a "bad boy"

I've never tried to be either. But I am who I am.

I like Views post above about being authentic. That made a lot of sense

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It had been said I'm too nice. I'd rather someone say that than call me a cunt though. "

But i thought you're a twat?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It had been said I'm too nice. I'd rather someone say that than call me a cunt though.

But i thought you're a twat?"

I'm many things to many people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It had been said I'm too nice. I'd rather someone say that than call me a cunt though.

But i thought you're a twat?

I'm many things to many people. "

Your a jolly splendid chap Sir

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"with nice guys i always want to see if there's a wild man inside..

I have my more devilish side

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ejay, how do you see yourself?

I like to think I found a good balance between nice, polite and respectful but equally direct and upfront/honest.

It just got me thinking because I was told I was far "too nice" to meet from one person and another person said I was to much of a "bad boy"

I've never tried to be either. But I am who I am.

I like Views post above about being authentic. That made a lot of sense "

It does, doesn't it?

I guess as he said you learnt it by experience as well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It had been said I'm too nice. I'd rather someone say that than call me a cunt though.

But i thought you're a twat?

I'm many things to many people. "

As am i mr.hatter as am i

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would class myself as and old school gent.

Good manners cost nothing. But I find are priceless.

Respectful to your _iews and opinions.

I have a very checky sense of humour but can be very sarcastic and if anyone upets or annoys me I can and will speak my mind.

I only give complements if I mean them. If they are thrown back I don't say it again.

I can't abide mind games. If I like you I'll tell you. If you txt me. I'll message you back. If I say I'll be there for 7. I'll generally turn up at 6 45.

If this makes me a nice person then yeah guilty as charged.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Advantage is what i meant

I won't take advantage of you, we can call it love at 40-40

sounds good to me

x x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ejay, how do you see yourself?

I like to think I found a good balance between nice, polite and respectful but equally direct and upfront/honest.

It just got me thinking because I was told I was far "too nice" to meet from one person and another person said I was to much of a "bad boy"

I've never tried to be either. But I am who I am.

I like Views post above about being authentic. That made a lot of sense "

From what I know I think that's a pretty accurate summary

Authentic was the other word I was looking for earlier.

People can come across as overly nice or as a bad boy but are they being authentic / true to themselves or is it all an act.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Being overly "nice" is a little too much, right?

Would you rather a man not lick your arse 24/7 with compliments and just be direct and a little "bad" sometimes?

There is nothing wrong with being nice and respectful for sure. However, it can only get you so far before it comes boring and borderline sad.

Is this were the "gentleman" card comes in? Nice, respectful and understanding. But doesn't come across too over the top and doesn't take shit?

It's insincere and infantilising to who it's aimed at.

It's also a means of control.

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By *ucyfur77Woman
over a year ago

Pleasuretown

Nice is kinda meh.

I prefer gentleman but I guess I'm old-fashioned

Fuck boy = not nice

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By *ordonBennettMan
over a year ago

dover

There's nice as in respectful without resorting to crudeness, which is fine, and there's nice as in oily and obsequious with persistent praise and compliments whose sincerity quickly wears thin...which is irritating.

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By *eather_Loves_SexWoman
over a year ago

Halfway Between London and Brighton

"Being overly "nice" is a little too much, right?

Would you rather a man not lick your arse 24/7 with compliments and just be direct and a little "bad" sometimes?

There is nothing wrong with being nice and respectful for sure. However, it can only get you so far before it comes boring and borderline sad.

Is this were the "gentleman" card comes in? Nice, respectful and understanding. But doesn't come across too over the top and doesn't take shit?

I like a mixture, a gentleman who is also a little frisky and cheeky, who will open the door for you but give your arse a little tap on the way through it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A psychologist would have a field day with me. I don't like overly nice people, they make me uneasy, but by that i mean in general day to day life.

As far as who I'm attracted to... I married a "nice" guy. Not sickeningly nice, but not a bad boy by any means. He bored me silly and we eventually split up. I'm now in a relationship with someone who's definitely not nice, I don't mean he's horrible, but he has an obvious naughty streak. He keeps me on my toes and he's just what I need right now... However i'm not 100% sure we have a future together.

I guess that means maybe nice guys are for settling down with, bad boys are for fun? But if i were ever to settle down again, it'd need to be with someone who's a mixture of the two. The old "someone who holds the door open then slaps my arse on the way through"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nice is kinda meh.

I prefer gentleman but I guess I'm old-fashioned

Fuck boy = not nice"

Fuck boys are never nice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A psychologist would have a field day with me. I don't like overly nice people, they make me uneasy, but by that i mean in general day to day life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There's a fine line between being too nice & coming across as superficial."

yeah. too many compliments, or nothing but compliments, and i start feeling bored of that.

i like frequent compliments from nice, genuine guys i find attractive, if any perviness is gonna happen i like them to leave it to me to start that rolling.

so no, i don't find nice guy boring at all, i know how to amuse myself and them, and i don't mind if they don't get pervy with me. although if i start anything i always hope they will join in.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes i snt mind ppl walking over me and sometimes i dnt realize thats how nice i am and i love my life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm too nice and trusting and get walked over, I'm trying to be a bad ass but it doesn't suit me

I'd rather talk to someone who is honest and nice, but also lets there intentions known from the beginning and stands their ground.

Better than 'oh god I think I'm falling in love with you, will you marry me' after talking for a couple of days

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By *odareyouMan
over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

[Removed by poster at 06/09/16 09:59:02]

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By *odareyouMan
over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

[Removed by poster at 06/09/16 09:59:48]

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By *odareyouMan
over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

Bloody auto carrot !!

I find 'Nice' to be / is a pretty non descript word..

If being polite and respectful having manners is too 'nice' then I'm guilty although for me those aren't bad traits to have.. if folk don't wish to meet me because I'm those that's fine chances are we wouldn't have got on.. I can't be someone else

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"Being overly "nice" is a little too much, right?

Would you rather a man not lick your arse 24/7 with compliments and just be direct and a little "bad" sometimes?

There is nothing wrong with being nice and respectful for sure. However, it can only get you so far before it comes boring and borderline sad.

Is this were the "gentleman" card comes in? Nice, respectful and understanding. But doesn't come across too over the top and doesn't take shit?

'A gentleman is just a patient wolf' - that's my kind of fella.

Nice is a ghastly word often used as a euphemism for other characteristics which can be positive or negative - weak, boring, sycophantic, fake on the one hand, or thoughtful, respectful, charming yet authentic on the other.

We pretty much all want the latter without any of the former. But that doesn't mean I don't also want someone who is witty, strong, intense, passionate and edgy as well!

I like a man's man who is a risk-taker, charismatic, a winner, maybe a touch full of himself, someone who challenges authorities - but knows how to treat his woman well. No reason why exciting cannot go hand in hand with integrity.

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By *aughty_amazonWoman
over a year ago

BRISTOL

I'm a sucker for a bad boy with a heart

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There's a fine line between being too nice & coming across as superficial."

This. Sickly nice guys make me feel uncomfortable. And on here, it makes them look desperate and needy. Yes its good to be polite and respectful but don't arse lick for attention.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Be too nice and you can be sure ppl will walk all over you.

That's not always the case.

You can be nice and still stand your ground without being a "bad boy" or a cunt.

This is also what I mean. How do you not take shit with avoiding coming across like a bad boy or a cunt?"

In my opinion it's all about how you write it (text, email) or say it and even come across in general.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"with nice guys i always want to see if there's a wild man inside..

There always is.

Unless there isn't, then it sucks for you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Be too nice and you can be sure ppl will walk all over you. "

I read that really very badly wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"there's nice where you are nice as opposed to being nasty and then there creepy sickly over nice which is just awful "

This

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm a nice guy, and I don't let people walk over me. If someone doesn't like me being nice, they can fuck off

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By *ordonBennettMan
over a year ago

dover

"I'm a nice guy, and I don't let people walk over me. If someone doesn't like me being nice, they can fuck off

That's not very nice!

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By *ancs MinxWoman
over a year ago

Burnley

Prefer nice with a very naughty streak as well..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What you see is what you get with me...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There's a fine line between being too nice & coming across as superficial."

There is also the question of how genuine the niceness is..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I often wonder if these self appointed 'nice guys' are actually nice guys, or simply ordinary guys who don't have the balls to be bad boys, so make do with the only option left.

A genuine nice guy, a good, strong compassionate MAN will never have to tell you he is or claim it, you'll see it in his actions and his choice of words, and this takes time to see and realise.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Assume nothing, respectfully state your wishes and give space. Give me a reason to reply to you and think, hmm, maybe... just maybe ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I often wonder if these self appointed 'nice guys' are actually nice guys, or simply ordinary guys who don't have the balls to be bad boys, so make do with the only option left.

A genuine nice guy, a good, strong compassionate MAN will never have to tell you he is or claim it, you'll see it in his actions and his choice of words, and this takes time to see and realise."

Yep, I'm definitely nice because I lack the balls to be a bad boy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I doubt any one would describe me as "nice".

I take shit from no one.

I give people the benefit of doubt until I know different.

I generally respect peoples choices.

If someone is being a Dick IMO I will call them a Dick, man or woman.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I often wonder if these self appointed 'nice guys' are actually nice guys, or simply ordinary guys who don't have the balls to be bad boys, so make do with the only option left.

A genuine nice guy, a good, strong compassionate MAN will never have to tell you he is or claim it, you'll see it in his actions and his choice of words, and this takes time to see and realise."

Or flip that argument on its head, are the 'bad boys' just ordinary men who lack the balls and integrity to do the right thing and act correctly consistently with everyone so revert to child like selfish behaviour patterns?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I often wonder if these self appointed 'nice guys' are actually nice guys, or simply ordinary guys who don't have the balls to be bad boys, so make do with the only option left.

A genuine nice guy, a good, strong compassionate MAN will never have to tell you he is or claim it, you'll see it in his actions and his choice of words, and this takes time to see and realise.

Lol you beat me to it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I often wonder if these self appointed 'nice guys' are actually nice guys, or simply ordinary guys who don't have the balls to be bad boys, so make do with the only option left.

A genuine nice guy, a good, strong compassionate MAN will never have to tell you he is or claim it, you'll see it in his actions and his choice of words, and this takes time to see and realise."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

'A gentleman is just a patient wolf' - that's my kind of fella.

We pretty much all want the latter without any of the former. But that doesn't mean I don't also want someone who is witty, strong, intense, passionate and edgy as well!

Well said

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

I like a man's man too and if he can bring along another's mans' man...... Happy days

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I stand up for myself and am fiery so for example a man is letting me away with bad behaviour then yes, he's too nice.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I like a man's man too and if he can bring along another's mans' man...... Happy days

many manly men..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not into too nice, in men or women (e.g. people I'm friends with). Simpering idiots revolt me. But I hate the whole "bad boy" schtick as well. Just be who you actually are, and you'll always find your place and the people who want to be with you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nice guys bore me. I'd eat them alive. If you're not a challenge to me, then you're not of interest to me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like men who are a challenge. After my initial shyness phase has passed (about 3 weeks) I get very minxy.

Now nice men are fine and much more preferable than evil bastards who treat women like shit, but for me a guy has to be assertive and no nonsense and able to handle my sass, otherwise they'll be so tightly wound around my finger they won't know what happened.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I prefer men who are comfortable being themselves, have courage in their convictions and a sense of respect for self and others. You don't have to be overly nice to achieve this.

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By *rotiquexxxMan
over a year ago

Unquenchable Desires

Cher sings it's in his kiss. From reading this thread, women can spot a bullshitter from the way they speak. Especially if people write they way they gob. Do wot naa? Generally speaking, manners go a long way but sucky compliments do not.

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