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I like people like the ones you describe. It means I don't waste any time meeting them.  | |||
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"Yep. I normally ask them their opinions on subspace and aftercare. Most haven't got a fucking *clue* what I'm on about. Says it all." Yes aftercare , what is that some say,, its to prevent sub drop , errrrm ok off to google they go | |||
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"Yep. I normally ask them their opinions on subspace and aftercare. Most haven't got a fucking *clue* what I'm on about. Says it all. Yes aftercare , what is that some say,, its to prevent sub drop , errrrm ok off to google they go "Out of curiosity,how did you learn about sub drop and how to deal with it? | |||
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Too many "doms" about now.
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"Yep. I normally ask them their opinions on subspace and aftercare. Most haven't got a fucking *clue* what I'm on about. Says it all. Yes aftercare , what is that some say,, its to prevent sub drop , errrrm ok off to google they go
Out of curiosity,how did you learn about sub drop and how to deal with it? " | |||
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"
Too many "doms" about now.
"How does that affect you? | |||
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"Yep. I normally ask them their opinions on subspace and aftercare. Most haven't got a fucking *clue* what I'm on about. Says it all. Yes aftercare , what is that some say,, its to prevent sub drop , errrrm ok off to google they go
Out of curiosity,how did you learn about sub drop and how to deal with it? "I learnt by having experienced the above type of men and me not knowing really why I felt so deflated and lethargic feelings of guilt after having intense sex or role play. I didn't know what it was. Any dom with any know how will prevent this by slowing down the scene towards the end of play ensuring I'm hydrated and talk to me. Cuddle maybe and contact me hrs later the day after check I'm ok, stuff like that generally x | |||
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"Shut up and make me a sandwich ! Ok sir "And go easy on the mayo biatch | |||
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"Yep. I normally ask them their opinions on subspace and aftercare. Most haven't got a fucking *clue* what I'm on about. Says it all. Yes aftercare , what is that some say,, its to prevent sub drop , errrrm ok off to google they go
Out of curiosity,how did you learn about sub drop and how to deal with it?
I learnt by having experienced the above type of men and me not knowing really why I felt so deflated and lethargic feelings of guilt after having intense sex or role play. I didn't know what it was. Any dom with any know how will prevent this by slowing down the scene towards the end of play ensuring I'm hydrated and talk to me. Cuddle maybe and contact me hrs later the day after check I'm ok, stuff like that generally x"My partner and I have had to learn the hard way about 'sub drop'..I don't identify as a Dom, but we have explored different dynamics quite a bit..it is sometimes difficult as we don't live close and work schedules etc...but we now recognise it, and can plan for it to an extent. | |||
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"Yep. I normally ask them their opinions on subspace and aftercare. Most haven't got a fucking *clue* what I'm on about. Says it all. Yes aftercare , what is that some say,, its to prevent sub drop , errrrm ok off to google they go
Out of curiosity,how did you learn about sub drop and how to deal with it?
I learnt by having experienced the above type of men and me not knowing really why I felt so deflated and lethargic feelings of guilt after having intense sex or role play. I didn't know what it was. Any dom with any know how will prevent this by slowing down the scene towards the end of play ensuring I'm hydrated and talk to me. Cuddle maybe and contact me hrs later the day after check I'm ok, stuff like that generally x"There is a time and a place for everything. The build up the heightened sexual activity (in what ever form) and the post coital sense are all equally important. In my humble opinion.........does that make me submissive? | |||
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"You don't seem very submissive OP!
I like people like the ones you describe. It means I don't waste any time meeting them. "really she sounds like every true submissive I've ever known they no their own mind what the want and how they expect it to be delivered . as for guys thinking they can make a sub submit because they demand they do, its never going to happen you have to win that submission it can never be taken from them its a precious gift given to those who prove themselves worthy of handing the responsibility of that gift. | |||
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"Yep. I normally ask them their opinions on subspace and aftercare. Most haven't got a fucking *clue* what I'm on about. Says it all. Yes aftercare , what is that some say,, its to prevent sub drop , errrrm ok off to google they go
Out of curiosity,how did you learn about sub drop and how to deal with it?
I learnt by having experienced the above type of men and me not knowing really why I felt so deflated and lethargic feelings of guilt after having intense sex or role play. I didn't know what it was. Any dom with any know how will prevent this by slowing down the scene towards the end of play ensuring I'm hydrated and talk to me. Cuddle maybe and contact me hrs later the day after check I'm ok, stuff like that generally x
There is a time and a place for everything. The build up the heightened sexual activity (in what ever form) and the post coital sense are all equally important. In my humble opinion.........does that make me submissive?"The mind has to be gently led and cohercised and then repaired the body will always follow. | |||
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"Yep. I normally ask them their opinions on subspace and aftercare. Most haven't got a fucking *clue* what I'm on about. Says it all. Yes aftercare , what is that some say,, its to prevent sub drop , errrrm ok off to google they go
Out of curiosity,how did you learn about sub drop and how to deal with it?
I learnt by having experienced the above type of men and me not knowing really why I felt so deflated and lethargic feelings of guilt after having intense sex or role play. I didn't know what it was. Any dom with any know how will prevent this by slowing down the scene towards the end of play ensuring I'm hydrated and talk to me. Cuddle maybe and contact me hrs later the day after check I'm ok, stuff like that generally x
My partner and I have had to learn the hard way about 'sub drop'..I don't identify as a Dom, but we have explored different dynamics quite a bit..it is sometimes difficult as we don't live close and work schedules etc...but we now recognise it, and can plan for it to an extent. "It can be really soul destroying if you've had a really intense scene , glad you've worked it out as I did. It made such a difference after I started to educate myself and network talk to people in the bdsm community about my feelings and realised I was feeling this way because of lack of after care. X | |||
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"Yep. I normally ask them their opinions on subspace and aftercare. Most haven't got a fucking *clue* what I'm on about. Says it all. Yes aftercare , what is that some say,, its to prevent sub drop , errrrm ok off to google they go
Out of curiosity,how did you learn about sub drop and how to deal with it?
I learnt by having experienced the above type of men and me not knowing really why I felt so deflated and lethargic feelings of guilt after having intense sex or role play. I didn't know what it was. Any dom with any know how will prevent this by slowing down the scene towards the end of play ensuring I'm hydrated and talk to me. Cuddle maybe and contact me hrs later the day after check I'm ok, stuff like that generally x"i don't think its a good idea to give away the dark arts of being a true caring dominant. as you arm the fuckwits and wane bees with just enough knowledge to trick some unsuspecting newbie into a bad mistake at best a terrible one at worst. | |||
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"Yep. I normally ask them their opinions on subspace and aftercare. Most haven't got a fucking *clue* what I'm on about. Says it all. Yes aftercare , what is that some say,, its to prevent sub drop , errrrm ok off to google they go
Out of curiosity,how did you learn about sub drop and how to deal with it?
I learnt by having experienced the above type of men and me not knowing really why I felt so deflated and lethargic feelings of guilt after having intense sex or role play. I didn't know what it was. Any dom with any know how will prevent this by slowing down the scene towards the end of play ensuring I'm hydrated and talk to me. Cuddle maybe and contact me hrs later the day after check I'm ok, stuff like that generally x
i don't think its a good idea to give away the dark arts of being a true caring dominant.
as you arm the fuckwits and wane bees with just enough knowledge to trick some unsuspecting newbie into a bad mistake at best a terrible one at worst. "Ooops sorry | |||
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"Real Dom/sub relationships keep it to themselves. " Do they? | |||
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"Yep. I normally ask them their opinions on subspace and aftercare. Most haven't got a fucking *clue* what I'm on about. Says it all. Yes aftercare , what is that some say,, its to prevent sub drop , errrrm ok off to google they go
Out of curiosity,how did you learn about sub drop and how to deal with it?
I learnt by having experienced the above type of men and me not knowing really why I felt so deflated and lethargic feelings of guilt after having intense sex or role play. I didn't know what it was. Any dom with any know how will prevent this by slowing down the scene towards the end of play ensuring I'm hydrated and talk to me. Cuddle maybe and contact me hrs later the day after check I'm ok, stuff like that generally x
i don't think its a good idea to give away the dark arts of being a true caring dominant.
as you arm the fuckwits and wane bees with just enough knowledge to trick some unsuspecting newbie into a bad mistake at best a terrible one at worst. "So is there a set curriculum for this kind of requirement. Do you attend Hogwarts for instruction in the black art of BDSM? Its in the soul and is played out in the mind to bring pleasure to the flesh........... | |||
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"Yep. I normally ask them their opinions on subspace and aftercare. Most haven't got a fucking *clue* what I'm on about. Says it all. Yes aftercare , what is that some say,, its to prevent sub drop , errrrm ok off to google they go
Out of curiosity,how did you learn about sub drop and how to deal with it?
I learnt by having experienced the above type of men and me not knowing really why I felt so deflated and lethargic feelings of guilt after having intense sex or role play. I didn't know what it was. Any dom with any know how will prevent this by slowing down the scene towards the end of play ensuring I'm hydrated and talk to me. Cuddle maybe and contact me hrs later the day after check I'm ok, stuff like that generally x
i don't think its a good idea to give away the dark arts of being a true caring dominant.
as you arm the fuckwits and wane bees with just enough knowledge to trick some unsuspecting newbie into a bad mistake at best a terrible one at worst.
So is there a set curriculum for this kind of requirement. Do you attend Hogwarts for instruction in the black art of BDSM? Its in the soul and is played out in the mind to bring pleasure to the flesh..........."Yes but some diddly doms aren't naturally caring or aware of elements about bdsm role play edge play etc and think to be dom you just have to be demanding and rough and a Nasty bas**rd. And will disregard a subs safety and well being. X | |||
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"Yep. I normally ask them their opinions on subspace and aftercare. Most haven't got a fucking *clue* what I'm on about. Says it all. Yes aftercare , what is that some say,, its to prevent sub drop , errrrm ok off to google they go
Out of curiosity,how did you learn about sub drop and how to deal with it?
I learnt by having experienced the above type of men and me not knowing really why I felt so deflated and lethargic feelings of guilt after having intense sex or role play. I didn't know what it was. Any dom with any know how will prevent this by slowing down the scene towards the end of play ensuring I'm hydrated and talk to me. Cuddle maybe and contact me hrs later the day after check I'm ok, stuff like that generally x
i don't think its a good idea to give away the dark arts of being a true caring dominant.
as you arm the fuckwits and wane bees with just enough knowledge to trick some unsuspecting newbie into a bad mistake at best a terrible one at worst.
So is there a set curriculum for this kind of requirement. Do you attend Hogwarts for instruction in the black art of BDSM? Its in the soul and is played out in the mind to bring pleasure to the flesh...........
Yes but some diddly doms aren't naturally caring or aware of elements about bdsm role play edge play etc and think to be dom you just have to be demanding and rough and a Nasty bas**rd. And will disregard a subs safety and well being. X"While I don't disagree with you, I do struggle with the somewhat condescending tone that is being used Yes dimly Doms are often clueless but some will learn and more importantly be open to learning. Which is more than can be said for the 'real' Doms who know it all and more annoyingly believe that their way is the right way and those who don't share their mindset are somehow inferior. BDSM can take many forms along as it is Risk Aware and Consensual them how others play is up to them as far as I'm concerned. I'd reiterate I don't disagree with your sentiment as such but this thread could easily become horribly elitest. Everyone was new to kink once, people forget that. | |||
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"Real Dom/sub relationships keep it to themselves. " | |||
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"Yep. I normally ask them their opinions on subspace and aftercare. Most haven't got a fucking *clue* what I'm on about. Says it all. Yes aftercare , what is that some say,, its to prevent sub drop , errrrm ok off to google they go
Out of curiosity,how did you learn about sub drop and how to deal with it?
I learnt by having experienced the above type of men and me not knowing really why I felt so deflated and lethargic feelings of guilt after having intense sex or role play. I didn't know what it was. Any dom with any know how will prevent this by slowing down the scene towards the end of play ensuring I'm hydrated and talk to me. Cuddle maybe and contact me hrs later the day after check I'm ok, stuff like that generally x
i don't think its a good idea to give away the dark arts of being a true caring dominant.
as you arm the fuckwits and wane bees with just enough knowledge to trick some unsuspecting newbie into a bad mistake at best a terrible one at worst.
So is there a set curriculum for this kind of requirement. Do you attend Hogwarts for instruction in the black art of BDSM? Its in the soul and is played out in the mind to bring pleasure to the flesh..........."now don't be silly I'm not saying that at all if one is truly drawn to bdsm and d/s dynamic one will read books on the subject and learn that way or attend a local munch to discuss the dynamic they love with others . sadly lots of fuckwits try to use the bdsm dynamic to get laid they have no real love for it or interest in it past getting a fuck and as such thses types of individuals do more harm than good . do you really think its a good idea to arm such people with just enough knowledge to trick a newbie into a mistake at best a terrible dangerous situation at worst...? if so then maybe you should attend a munch designed around hearing and reassuring such individuals that this has happened to that that is not the way a true dominate would behave and what happened to them wasn't their thought at all. | |||
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"Yep. I normally ask them their opinions on subspace and aftercare. Most haven't got a fucking *clue* what I'm on about. Says it all. Yes aftercare , what is that some say,, its to prevent sub drop , errrrm ok off to google they go
Out of curiosity,how did you learn about sub drop and how to deal with it?
I learnt by having experienced the above type of men and me not knowing really why I felt so deflated and lethargic feelings of guilt after having intense sex or role play. I didn't know what it was. Any dom with any know how will prevent this by slowing down the scene towards the end of play ensuring I'm hydrated and talk to me. Cuddle maybe and contact me hrs later the day after check I'm ok, stuff like that generally x
i don't think its a good idea to give away the dark arts of being a true caring dominant.
as you arm the fuckwits and wane bees with just enough knowledge to trick some unsuspecting newbie into a bad mistake at best a terrible one at worst.
So is there a set curriculum for this kind of requirement. Do you attend Hogwarts for instruction in the black art of BDSM? Its in the soul and is played out in the mind to bring pleasure to the flesh...........
Yes but some diddly doms aren't naturally caring or aware of elements about bdsm role play edge play etc and think to be dom you just have to be demanding and rough and a Nasty bas**rd. And will disregard a subs safety and well being. X
While I don't disagree with you, I do struggle with the somewhat condescending tone that is being used
Yes dimly Doms are often clueless but some will learn and more importantly be open to learning. Which is more than can be said for the 'real' Doms who know it all and more annoyingly believe that their way is the right way and those who don't share their mindset are somehow inferior.
BDSM can take many forms along as it is Risk Aware and Consensual them how others play is up to them as far as I'm concerned.
I'd reiterate I don't disagree with your sentiment as such but this thread could easily become horribly elitest. Everyone was new to kink once, people forget that."It wasn't meant elitist in the slightest or for people wanting to explore as everyone starts somewhere. I am only new and learning but I am not soft and know you have to research and network etc. That was more my point the wanna be doms who think they know it all without any regard for exploring or researching etc | |||
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Funny enough, I get numerous so called Doms asking to submit to me. They like to present themselves as all macho, masculine and dominant but in a BDSM context, can't Dom their way out of a wet paper bag.
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" My partner and I have had to learn the hard way about 'sub drop'..I don't identify as a Dom, but we have explored different dynamics quite a bit..it is sometimes difficult as we don't live close and work schedules etc...but we now recognise it, and can plan for it to an extent.
It can be really soul destroying if you've had a really intense scene , glad you've worked it out as I did. It made such a difference after I started to educate myself and network talk to people in the bdsm community about my feelings and realised I was feeling this way because of lack of after care. X"It was a new for me especially. Having never experienced it, it was quite unnerving initially..and we don't do bdsm play. Even though I am not Dom, I can be assertive,but I am normally too playful, and switch easily. It was just through pushing each other...  | |||
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"thing is you've got to want it too OP. while i agree and have come across wannabes, not everyone wants a brat or top be topped from the bottom..just because you know what you like doesn't mean to say you are going to get it. its a reciprocal relationship as unique as any pairing and that means allowing him to learn how to be the best Dom to you and that means commitment to being the best sub you can be..if not willing to understand this journey... you are both wannabes.." Yes I totally understand this and I'm aware of the dynamics and that I have to grow along with my dom and it's a dynamic that takes time and trust. It's something not something I've just jumped into the last week or so. I've been to munches and I talk to experenced members of the community they are a great help and support have already taught me lots | |||
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" My partner and I have had to learn the hard way about 'sub drop'..I don't identify as a Dom, but we have explored different dynamics quite a bit..it is sometimes difficult as we don't live close and work schedules etc...but we now recognise it, and can plan for it to an extent.
It can be really soul destroying if you've had a really intense scene , glad you've worked it out as I did. It made such a difference after I started to educate myself and network talk to people in the bdsm community about my feelings and realised I was feeling this way because of lack of after care. X
It was a new for me especially. Having never experienced it, it was quite unnerving initially..and we don't do bdsm play. Even though I am not Dom, I can be assertive,but I am normally too playful, and switch easily. It was just through pushing each other... "You don't have to be 'dom' to be kinky or into bdsm, just like you don't have to be sub. X | |||
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" My partner and I have had to learn the hard way about 'sub drop'..I don't identify as a Dom, but we have explored different dynamics quite a bit..it is sometimes difficult as we don't live close and work schedules etc...but we now recognise it, and can plan for it to an extent.
It can be really soul destroying if you've had a really intense scene , glad you've worked it out as I did. It made such a difference after I started to educate myself and network talk to people in the bdsm community about my feelings and realised I was feeling this way because of lack of after care. X
It was a new for me especially. Having never experienced it, it was quite unnerving initially..and we don't do bdsm play. Even though I am not Dom, I can be assertive,but I am normally too playful, and switch easily. It was just through pushing each other... "i crashed badly once, through lack of maintenance, back last winter, with someone very good for me, then i realised i have far greater capacity to be in altered states for longer than most people due to my previous training in such..the topping and bottoming books are good and so is screw the roses bring me thorns available as PDF, if anyones interested x | |||
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" My partner and I have had to learn the hard way about 'sub drop'..I don't identify as a Dom, but we have explored different dynamics quite a bit..it is sometimes difficult as we don't live close and work schedules etc...but we now recognise it, and can plan for it to an extent.
It can be really soul destroying if you've had a really intense scene , glad you've worked it out as I did. It made such a difference after I started to educate myself and network talk to people in the bdsm community about my feelings and realised I was feeling this way because of lack of after care. X
It was a new for me especially. Having never experienced it, it was quite unnerving initially..and we don't do bdsm play. Even though I am not Dom, I can be assertive,but I am normally too playful, and switch easily. It was just through pushing each other...
i crashed badly once, through lack of maintenance, back last winter, with someone very good for me, then i realised i have far greater capacity to be in altered states for longer than most people due to my previous training in such..the topping and bottoming books are good and so is screw the roses bring me thorns available as PDF, if anyones interested x"I will look that one up thank you is it on iTunes ! ? X | |||
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" My partner and I have had to learn the hard way about 'sub drop'..I don't identify as a Dom, but we have explored different dynamics quite a bit..it is sometimes difficult as we don't live close and work schedules etc...but we now recognise it, and can plan for it to an extent.
It can be really soul destroying if you've had a really intense scene , glad you've worked it out as I did. It made such a difference after I started to educate myself and network talk to people in the bdsm community about my feelings and realised I was feeling this way because of lack of after care. X
It was a new for me especially. Having never experienced it, it was quite unnerving initially..and we don't do bdsm play. Even though I am not Dom, I can be assertive,but I am normally too playful, and switch easily. It was just through pushing each other...
i crashed badly once, through lack of maintenance, back last winter, with someone very good for me, then i realised i have far greater capacity to be in altered states for longer than most people due to my previous training in such..the topping and bottoming books are good and so is screw the roses bring me thorns available as PDF, if anyones interested x
I will look that one up thank you is it on iTunes ! ? X"i found them with google search, so i dont know xx | |||
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" My partner and I have had to learn the hard way about 'sub drop'..I don't identify as a Dom, but we have explored different dynamics quite a bit..it is sometimes difficult as we don't live close and work schedules etc...but we now recognise it, and can plan for it to an extent.
It can be really soul destroying if you've had a really intense scene , glad you've worked it out as I did. It made such a difference after I started to educate myself and network talk to people in the bdsm community about my feelings and realised I was feeling this way because of lack of after care. X
It was a new for me especially. Having never experienced it, it was quite unnerving initially..and we don't do bdsm play. Even though I am not Dom, I can be assertive,but I am normally too playful, and switch easily. It was just through pushing each other...
i crashed badly once, through lack of maintenance, back last winter, with someone very good for me, then i realised i have far greater capacity to be in altered states for longer than most people due to my previous training in such..the topping and bottoming books are good and so is screw the roses bring me thorns available as PDF, if anyones interested x
I will look that one up thank you is it on iTunes ! ? Xi found them with google search, so i dont know xx"Found it my bedtime reading tonight. Thank you x | |||
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"Ahh you see I'm not in my day to day life but it seems to be a thing were as men assume because your submissive then in your daily life your weak and need guidance "Nah, they think you're weak and will enjoy being their servant and have them tell you what to do. You'll serve all of their needs and desires, on demand, without question. You'll accept whatever treatment they dish out, and you'll love it, or at least not complain. | |||
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"Ahh you see I'm not in my day to day life but it seems to be a thing were as men assume because your submissive then in your daily life your weak and need guidance
Nah, they think you're weak and will enjoy being their servant and have them tell you what to do.
You'll serve all of their needs and desires, on demand, without question. You'll accept whatever treatment they dish out, and you'll love it, or at least not complain."with the right one...yes...and? | |||
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"thing is you've got to want it too OP. while i agree and have come across wannabes, not everyone wants a brat or top be topped from the bottom..just because you know what you like doesn't mean to say you are going to get it. its a reciprocal relationship as unique as any pairing and that means allowing him to learn how to be the best Dom to you and that means commitment to being the best sub you can be..if not willing to understand this journey... you are both wannabes.." Very true | |||
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"Ahh you see I'm not in my day to day life but it seems to be a thing were as men assume because your submissive then in your daily life your weak and need guidance
Nah, they think you're weak and will enjoy being their servant and have them tell you what to do.
You'll serve all of their needs and desires, on demand, without question. You'll accept whatever treatment they dish out, and you'll love it, or at least not complain."yes so what are you saying the right to all that is earned not taken or demanded again that dynamic can only come about with a sub who enjoys the things you listed if not its not going to happen no matter how much pressure the guy tries to exert . | |||
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"Ahh you see I'm not in my day to day life but it seems to be a thing were as men assume because your submissive then in your daily life your weak and need guidance
Nah, they think you're weak and will enjoy being their servant and have them tell you what to do.
You'll serve all of their needs and desires, on demand, without question. You'll accept whatever treatment they dish out, and you'll love it, or at least not complain.with the right one...yes...and?"With the right one and nothing. With the right one I'm sure it's great, (not being a sub, I can't speak from personal experience). It's those that expect this from the very beginning with everyone who identifies as sub, just because they say they are Dom, that are the problem. They expect the sub to make this happen for them, according to what they want, without realising it's a two-way street and that just being told what to do is not necessarily going to be rewarding for a sub. | |||
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"Ahh you see I'm not in my day to day life but it seems to be a thing were as men assume because your submissive then in your daily life your weak and need guidance
Nah, they think you're weak and will enjoy being their servant and have them tell you what to do.
You'll serve all of their needs and desires, on demand, without question. You'll accept whatever treatment they dish out, and you'll love it, or at least not complain.
yes so what are you saying the right to all that is earned not taken or demanded again that dynamic can only come about with a sub who enjoys the things you listed if not its not going to happen no matter how much pressure the guy tries to exert ."It needs to be a mutual thing, like any good relationship. Anyone who thinks a sub is someone who'll enjoy being told what to do so much that it's all they need is an idiot. | |||
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"Ahh you see I'm not in my day to day life but it seems to be a thing were as men assume because your submissive then in your daily life your weak and need guidance
Nah, they think you're weak and will enjoy being their servant and have them tell you what to do.
You'll serve all of their needs and desires, on demand, without question. You'll accept whatever treatment they dish out, and you'll love it, or at least not complain.
yes so what are you saying the right to all that is earned not taken or demanded again that dynamic can only come about with a sub who enjoys the things you listed if not its not going to happen no matter how much pressure the guy tries to exert .
It needs to be a mutual thing, like any good relationship.
Anyone who thinks a sub is someone who'll enjoy being told what to do so much that it's all they need is an idiot." | |||
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"Ahh you see I'm not in my day to day life but it seems to be a thing were as men assume because your submissive then in your daily life your weak and need guidance
Nah, they think you're weak and will enjoy being their servant and have them tell you what to do.
You'll serve all of their needs and desires, on demand, without question. You'll accept whatever treatment they dish out, and you'll love it, or at least not complain.with the right one...yes...and?
With the right one and nothing. With the right one I'm sure it's great, (not being a sub, I can't speak from personal experience).
It's those that expect this from the very beginning with everyone who identifies as sub, just because they say they are Dom, that are the problem.
They expect the sub to make this happen for them, according to what they want, without realising it's a two-way street and that just being told what to do is not necessarily going to be rewarding for a sub."i agree it takes some effort on the part of both to establish structure, some really are wannabes, however some are experienced Doms that wish the prospective sub to know what its like with them as a Dom..its about finding out about yourself and which one fits. but i do have slave tendencies, so for me once ive met, connected and there is a willingness to develop a relationship along these dynamics, i require them to take control of the structure and exhibit protocol to maintain that. but all subs are different, all preferences are different..i dont want that much say, once trust has been established. i give away that, as part of the power exchange, but that suits me and it suits whom i see. it works for us x | |||
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"Incidentally, I don't think submission is a gift any more than domination is a gift. It's a symbiotic relationship - at least it should be - and mutually rewarding, with each person is giving the other what they need. Domination is hard work and has a lot of responsibility. It can be mentally and physically draining. Anyone dominating a sub well is giving them as much of a gift as the submission they receive in return." Hi Dee I agree with you to an extent that it should be mutually rewarding. However the gift for me is the trust that person puts in me | |||
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"Incidentally, I don't think submission is a gift any more than domination is a gift. It's a symbiotic relationship - at least it should be - and mutually rewarding, with each person is giving the other what they need. Domination is hard work and has a lot of responsibility. It can be mentally and physically draining. Anyone dominating a sub well is giving them as much of a gift as the submission they receive in return. Hi Dee I agree with you to an extent that it should be mutually rewarding. However the gift for me is the trust that person puts in me " | |||
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"Incidentally, I don't think submission is a gift any more than domination is a gift. It's a symbiotic relationship - at least it should be - and mutually rewarding, with each person is giving the other what they need. Domination is hard work and has a lot of responsibility. It can be mentally and physically draining. Anyone dominating a sub well is giving them as much of a gift as the submission they receive in return. Hi Dee I agree with you to an extent that it should be mutually rewarding. However the gift for me is the trust that person puts in me " True, but the Dom also has to trust the sub. The sub receives just as much back, in a good relationship, so the submission is no more of a gift than what they receive in return. | |||
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"Incidentally, I don't think submission is a gift any more than domination is a gift. It's a symbiotic relationship - at least it should be - and mutually rewarding, with each person is giving the other what they need. Domination is hard work and has a lot of responsibility. It can be mentally and physically draining. Anyone dominating a sub well is giving them as much of a gift as the submission they receive in return." yes your quite right it is symbiotic relationship and as such i can not play in a dynamic that is not fulfilling my needs as well. because of this fact i view any consent i receive that works for me as well as my play partner as a gift. i take the responsibility of my role very seriously because a true dynamic that works perfectly for both parties is so fulfilling for me its like a grift a special exhilarating gift. a relationship that is so hard to find that when you do find one that works you cherish nurture it and do all you can to keep it special and exhilarating for the both of you .  | |||
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"Ahh you see I'm not in my day to day life but it seems to be a thing were as men assume because your submissive then in your daily life your weak and need guidance
Nah, they think you're weak and will enjoy being their servant and have them tell you what to do.
You'll serve all of their needs and desires, on demand, without question. You'll accept whatever treatment they dish out, and you'll love it, or at least not complain.with the right one...yes...and?
With the right one and nothing. With the right one I'm sure it's great, (not being a sub, I can't speak from personal experience).
It's those that expect this from the very beginning with everyone who identifies as sub, just because they say they are Dom, that are the problem.
They expect the sub to make this happen for them, according to what they want, without realising it's a two-way street and that just being told what to do is not necessarily going to be rewarding for a sub.i agree it takes some effort on the part of both to establish structure, some really are wannabes, however some are experienced Doms that wish the prospective sub to know what its like with them as a Dom..its about finding out about yourself and which one fits. but i do have slave tendencies, so for me once ive met, connected and there is a willingness to develop a relationship along these dynamics, i require them to take control of the structure and exhibit protocol to maintain that. but all subs are different, all preferences are different..i dont want that much say, once trust has been established. i give away that, as part of the power exchange, but that suits me and it suits whom i see. it works for us x"The "met and connected" part is key here, I think. Subs, by definition, want to give up control, (though the extent and way will vary). Doms shouldn't assume that they'll enjoy doing it all the Dom's way. Some will, some won't. That connection is the vital part, and a willingness to work to develop things together. | |||
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"You don't seem very submissive OP!
I like people like the ones you describe. It means I don't waste any time meeting them.
really she sounds like every true submissive I've ever known they no their own mind what the want and how they expect it to be delivered .
as for guys thinking they can make a sub submit because they demand they do,
its never going to happen you have to win that submission it can never be taken from them its a precious gift given to those who prove themselves worthy of handing the responsibility of that gift. "I was joking. Play on words. I often forget that people take things literally on here. | |||
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"Real Dom/sub relationships keep it to themselves. Do they?" Yea,they don't have to go to clubs and join groups to let people know how marvellous they are at it. Or patronise others who aren't doing it "correctly". They just quietly get on with it with no fuss. | |||
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"Incidentally, I don't think submission is a gift any more than domination is a gift. It's a symbiotic relationship - at least it should be - and mutually rewarding, with each person is giving the other what they need. Domination is hard work and has a lot of responsibility. It can be mentally and physically draining. Anyone dominating a sub well is giving them as much of a gift as the submission they receive in return. Hi Dee I agree with you to an extent that it should be mutually rewarding. However the gift for me is the trust that person puts in me True, but the Dom also has to trust the sub. The sub receives just as much back, in a good relationship, so the submission is no more of a gift than what they receive in return." Off course its a two way thing. One is never more superior than the other. I find equality is very important just because i am Dom it doesnt mean my sub is beneath me or that i am a superior being. With out each other we do not exist. | |||
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"Ahh you see I'm not in my day to day life but it seems to be a thing were as men assume because your submissive then in your daily life your weak and need guidance "Totally agree. I've blocked several so called Doms due to their attitude and lack of knowledge about the lifestyle. | |||
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"Real Dom/sub relationships keep it to themselves. Do they? Yea,they don't have to go to clubs and join groups to let people know how marvellous they are at it. Or patronise others who aren't doing it "correctly". They just quietly get on with it with no fuss. " so all that do go to clubs and mix in the scene, are patronising arseholes..? you are imo, such a shit stirrer.. | |||
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"Real Dom/sub relationships keep it to themselves. Do they? Yea,they don't have to go to clubs and join groups to let people know how marvellous they are at it. Or patronise others who aren't doing it "correctly". They just quietly get on with it with no fuss. " Sorry but that's nonsense. Some do, some don't. All is valid nor better than the other. | |||
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"Adrenaline can damage your heart,in case anyone didn't know that. " and so can running for the bus or watching a horror film your point being..? | |||
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"Real Dom/sub relationships keep it to themselves. Do they? Yea,they don't have to go to clubs and join groups to let people know how marvellous they are at it. Or patronise others who aren't doing it "correctly". They just quietly get on with it with no fuss. " I wasnt patronising if that's aimed at me ? I was mearly stating an opinion of the ignorance of some men who think they can get a whip pull my hair and disregard every other aspect of a d/s dynamic or bdsm | |||
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"Real Dom/sub relationships keep it to themselves. Do they? Yea,they don't have to go to clubs and join groups to let people know how marvellous they are at it. Or patronise others who aren't doing it "correctly". They just quietly get on with it with no fuss. Sorry but that's nonsense. Some do, some don't. All is valid nor better than the other. " so a "real d/s dynamic can't mention a word or talk on a forum so they must be fake hey. | |||
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"Adrenaline can damage your heart,in case anyone didn't know that. and so can running for the bus or watching a horror film your point being..?" | |||
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"Real Dom/sub relationships keep it to themselves. Do they? Yea,they don't have to go to clubs and join groups to let people know how marvellous they are at it. Or patronise others who aren't doing it "correctly". They just quietly get on with it with no fuss. so all that do go to clubs and mix in the scene, are patronising arseholes..? you are imo, such a shit stirrer.." Im have to agree on this | |||
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"Yep. I normally ask them their opinions on subspace and aftercare. Most haven't got a fucking *clue* what I'm on about. Says it all. Yes aftercare , what is that some say,, its to prevent sub drop , errrrm ok off to google they go
Out of curiosity,how did you learn about sub drop and how to deal with it?
I learnt by having experienced the above type of men and me not knowing really why I felt so deflated and lethargic feelings of guilt after having intense sex or role play. I didn't know what it was. Any dom with any know how will prevent this by slowing down the scene towards the end of play ensuring I'm hydrated and talk to me. Cuddle maybe and contact me hrs later the day after check I'm ok, stuff like that generally x
i don't think its a good idea to give away the dark arts of being a true caring dominant.
as you arm the fuckwits and wane bees with just enough knowledge to trick some unsuspecting newbie into a bad mistake at best a terrible one at worst.
So is there a set curriculum for this kind of requirement. Do you attend Hogwarts for instruction in the black art of BDSM? Its in the soul and is played out in the mind to bring pleasure to the flesh...........
Yes but some diddly doms aren't naturally caring or aware of elements about bdsm role play edge play etc and think to be dom you just have to be demanding and rough and a Nasty bas**rd. And will disregard a subs safety and well being. X
While I don't disagree with you, I do struggle with the somewhat condescending tone that is being used
Yes dimly Doms are often clueless but some will learn and more importantly be open to learning. Which is more than can be said for the 'real' Doms who know it all and more annoyingly believe that their way is the right way and those who don't share their mindset are somehow inferior.
BDSM can take many forms along as it is Risk Aware and Consensual them how others play is up to them as far as I'm concerned.
I'd reiterate I don't disagree with your sentiment as such but this thread could easily become horribly elitest. Everyone was new to kink once, people forget that." | |||
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"Real Dom/sub relationships keep it to themselves. Do they? Yea,they don't have to go to clubs and join groups to let people know how marvellous they are at it. Or patronise others who aren't doing it "correctly". They just quietly get on with it with no fuss. so all that do go to clubs and mix in the scene, are patronising arseholes..? you are imo, such a shit stirrer.." You would think that. Didn't you say you were intelligent on another thread? Anyway,I'm using my life experiences to make my opinions,which keeps me well away from the show and tellers. I'm sure there are some lovely people in your club who like to help people to understand how your way works. I'm sure there are other people in other clubs who do the same. You're enjoying yourself,that's what matters. | |||
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"Real Dom/sub relationships keep it to themselves. Do they? Yea,they don't have to go to clubs and join groups to let people know how marvellous they are at it. Or patronise others who aren't doing it "correctly". They just quietly get on with it with no fuss. so all that do go to clubs and mix in the scene, are patronising arseholes..? you are imo, such a shit stirrer.. Im have to agree on this "That's fine. I wasn't expecting anyone to agree with me | |||
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"Real Dom/sub relationships keep it to themselves. Do they? Yea,they don't have to go to clubs and join groups to let people know how marvellous they are at it. Or patronise others who aren't doing it "correctly". They just quietly get on with it with no fuss. so all that do go to clubs and mix in the scene, are patronising arseholes..? you are imo, such a shit stirrer.. You would think that. Didn't you say you were intelligent on another thread? Anyway,I'm using my life experiences to make my opinions,which keeps me well away from the show and tellers. I'm sure there are some lovely people in your club who like to help people to understand how your way works. I'm sure there are other people in other clubs who do the same. You're enjoying yourself,that's what matters." if you really think thats what im all about, that im 'enjoying myself', so nothing else matters, then you are seriously deluded about me..what i think is that you are enjoying yourself, just constantly getting reactions from your negativity and that's all that matters to you.. you are telling so much about your own 'kinks' while you assume others, are like yourself..speak from the I, dont be speaking about whats important to me, or anyone i associate with. | |||
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"Real Dom/sub relationships keep it to themselves. Do they? Yea,they don't have to go to clubs and join groups to let people know how marvellous they are at it. Or patronise others who aren't doing it "correctly". They just quietly get on with it with no fuss. so all that do go to clubs and mix in the scene, are patronising arseholes..? you are imo, such a shit stirrer.. You would think that. Didn't you say you were intelligent on another thread? Anyway,I'm using my life experiences to make my opinions,which keeps me well away from the show and tellers. I'm sure there are some lovely people in your club who like to help people to understand how your way works. I'm sure there are other people in other clubs who do the same. You're enjoying yourself,that's what matters.if you really think thats what im all about, that im 'enjoying myself', so nothing else matters, then you are seriously deluded about me..what i think is that you are enjoying yourself, just constantly getting reactions from your negativity and that's all that matters to you.. you are telling so much about your own 'kinks' while you assume others, are like yourself..speak from the I, dont be speaking about whats important to me, or anyone i associate with." To me it's not something I enjoy like knitting or such its more a deep psychological need that runs deeper than spanking and name calling it's a journey that is making me learn about myself. I wouldn't expect (nana) to understand this as she has admitted herself she dosent understand it as such. It's very personal journey to me much more than physical and not just about 'enjoying myself' to me it's self discovery x | |||
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I find it equally as weird that ladies on here say they are into Sub/Dom relationships. Yet they think a mild spanking suffices. They have no concept of what it is. They say they have met many Dom's etc etc. A true Dom/Sub friendship is a journey of progression. No demands but guidance into the dark realms. To many people have read that crappy book or watched the film. Ive not btw but can only imagine its quality. | |||
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"Know your place lady
I find it equally as weird that ladies on here say they are into Sub/Dom relationships. Yet they think a mild spanking suffices. They have no concept of what it is. They say they have met many Dom's etc etc. A true Dom/Sub friendship is a journey of progression. No demands but guidance into the dark realms. To many people have read that crappy book or watched the film. Ive not btw but can only imagine its quality. "it is. thank you x | |||
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"Real Dom/sub relationships keep it to themselves. Do they? Yea,they don't have to go to clubs and join groups to let people know how marvellous they are at it. Or patronise others who aren't doing it "correctly". They just quietly get on with it with no fuss. so all that do go to clubs and mix in the scene, are patronising arseholes..? you are imo, such a shit stirrer.. You would think that. Didn't you say you were intelligent on another thread? Anyway,I'm using my life experiences to make my opinions,which keeps me well away from the show and tellers. I'm sure there are some lovely people in your club who like to help people to understand how your way works. I'm sure there are other people in other clubs who do the same. You're enjoying yourself,that's what matters.if you really think thats what im all about, that im 'enjoying myself', so nothing else matters, then you are seriously deluded about me..what i think is that you are enjoying yourself, just constantly getting reactions from your negativity and that's all that matters to you.. you are telling so much about your own 'kinks' while you assume others, are like yourself..speak from the I, dont be speaking about whats important to me, or anyone i associate with." | |||
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"Real Dom/sub relationships keep it to themselves. Do they? Yea,they don't have to go to clubs and join groups to let people know how marvellous they are at it. Or patronise others who aren't doing it "correctly". They just quietly get on with it with no fuss. so all that do go to clubs and mix in the scene, are patronising arseholes..? you are imo, such a shit stirrer.. You would think that. Didn't you say you were intelligent on another thread? Anyway,I'm using my life experiences to make my opinions,which keeps me well away from the show and tellers. I'm sure there are some lovely people in your club who like to help people to understand how your way works. I'm sure there are other people in other clubs who do the same. You're enjoying yourself,that's what matters.if you really think thats what im all about, that im 'enjoying myself', so nothing else matters, then you are seriously deluded about me..what i think is that you are enjoying yourself, just constantly getting reactions from your negativity and that's all that matters to you.. you are telling so much about your own 'kinks' while you assume others, are like yourself..speak from the I, dont be speaking about whats important to me, or anyone i associate with. "I haven't spoken about my kinks. If you're not enjoying yourself why are you doing it? I'm not being negative,I'm conveying my thoughts on Doms. You have yours,I have mine. | |||
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"Real Dom/sub relationships keep it to themselves. Do they? Yea,they don't have to go to clubs and join groups to let people know how marvellous they are at it. Or patronise others who aren't doing it "correctly". They just quietly get on with it with no fuss. so all that do go to clubs and mix in the scene, are patronising arseholes..? you are imo, such a shit stirrer.. You would think that. Didn't you say you were intelligent on another thread? Anyway,I'm using my life experiences to make my opinions,which keeps me well away from the show and tellers. I'm sure there are some lovely people in your club who like to help people to understand how your way works. I'm sure there are other people in other clubs who do the same. You're enjoying yourself,that's what matters.if you really think thats what im all about, that im 'enjoying myself', so nothing else matters, then you are seriously deluded about me..what i think is that you are enjoying yourself, just constantly getting reactions from your negativity and that's all that matters to you.. you are telling so much about your own 'kinks' while you assume others, are like yourself..speak from the I, dont be speaking about whats important to me, or anyone i associate with.
I haven't spoken about my kinks. If you're not enjoying yourself why are you doing it? I'm not being negative,I'm conveying my thoughts on Doms. You have yours,I have mine. "I also didn't say that nothing else matters. You seem to be reading a lot between lines that isn't there. Seen you do that before. | |||
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"Incidentally, I don't think submission is a gift any more than domination is a gift. It's a symbiotic relationship - at least it should be - and mutually rewarding, with each person is giving the other what they need. Domination is hard work and has a lot of responsibility. It can be mentally and physically draining. Anyone dominating a sub well is giving them as much of a gift as the submission they receive in return."
This whole submission is a gift thing kinda makes me  | |||
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"Shut up and make me a sandwich !" I tried that and she turned into a Witch made out of sand 
And that reminded me of the Dessert Island incident a few years back | |||
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"Know your place lady
I find it equally as weird that ladies on here say they are into Sub/Dom relationships. Yet they think a mild spanking suffices. They have no concept of what it is. They say they have met many Dom's etc etc. A true Dom/Sub friendship is a journey of progression. No demands but guidance into the dark realms. To many people have read that crappy book or watched the film. Ive not btw but can only imagine its quality. " | |||
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"Know your place lady
I find it equally as weird that ladies on here say they are into Sub/Dom relationships. Yet they think a mild spanking suffices. They have no concept of what it is. They say they have met many Dom's etc etc. A true Dom/Sub friendship is a journey of progression. No demands but guidance into the dark realms. To many people have read that crappy book or watched the film. Ive not btw but can only imagine its quality.
"What if a mild spanking is all they need? What if no physical contact is administered apart from regular intercourse? | |||
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"I am sick of people telling me they want to make me their slut or make me submit. Not sure what part of masochist they don't understand. " You can be submissive and a masochist, don't pigeon hole it, I have masochistic tendencies I enjoy breath play edge play impact play and my pain threshold is much higher than others I enjoy sharp objects and blood play stuff but I am very much submissive x | |||
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"I'm still learning this stuff. Turns out I can be quite dom but I have to trust the sub and vice versa. Most important thing I've learned is that like in poker everyone has a 'tell' so even if you can't call safe word (particularly when gagged) sometimes you just know. But I'm still learning. Im a diddly dom. So far..." My point about being a diddly dom was about the ignorance and the men who don't understand, quite the opposite to yourself. And yes your right a top dom etc has to know his sub if doing intense scenes as such as if your gagged and restrained safe words are not an option so they look at other cues such as body language , eye contact etc. Safe words should in my opinion never need to be used as they should know how to push and back off slow down etc, yellow maybe (slow, be careful) but never red. Good luck on your journey I'm finding it fascinating and it's opened my eyes and had me thinking about who I am considerably X | |||
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"Yep. I normally ask them their opinions on subspace and aftercare. Most haven't got a fucking *clue* what I'm on about. Says it all." The most important bit of a D/S relationship.... | |||
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"Yep. I normally ask them their opinions on subspace and aftercare. Most haven't got a fucking *clue* what I'm on about. Says it all. The most important bit of a D/S relationship...." Along with rules and honesty imo | |||
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"Yep. I normally ask them their opinions on subspace and aftercare. Most haven't got a fucking *clue* what I'm on about. Says it all. The most important bit of a D/S relationship...." For some. Not all. | |||
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"I am sick of people telling me they want to make me their slut or make me submit. Not sure what part of masochist they don't understand. You can be submissive and a masochist, don't pigeon hole it, I have masochistic tendencies I enjoy breath play edge play impact play and my pain threshold is much higher than others I enjoy sharp objects and blood play stuff but I am very much submissive x" Yes you can but it's more about the assumptions that are made rather than asking questions. I have not one single submissive cell in my body. | |||
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"I am sick of people telling me they want to make me their slut or make me submit. Not sure what part of masochist they don't understand. You can be submissive and a masochist, don't pigeon hole it, I have masochistic tendencies I enjoy breath play edge play impact play and my pain threshold is much higher than others I enjoy sharp objects and blood play stuff but I am very much submissive x Yes you can but it's more about the assumptions that are made rather than asking questions. I have not one single submissive cell in my body. " Exactly , you are what you are | |||
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"Ask them which Munches they attend... And their Fet name.... that would probably eliminate the '50 shades" types (which we still havent watched) PS look carefully at our pics." There is a clear hierarchy in BDSM circles. People should know their place.
They should innately know everything. If they need to Google or ask questions they are weak and should be banished.
It's not possible to learn new desires later in life from reading books. Books can't teach anything. | |||
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"Ask them which Munches they attend... And their Fet name.... that would probably eliminate the '50 shades" types (which we still havent watched) PS look carefully at our pics. There is a clear hierarchy in BDSM circles. People should know their place.
They should innately know everything. If they need to Google or ask questions they are weak and should be banished.
It's not possible to learn new desires later in life from reading books. Books can't teach anything. "I don't know if I would entirely agree with that. In some cases people have had for a long time a "feeling" that the couldn't explain or are not familiar with the scene. Sometimes asking questions or reading can help them understand their own feelings and show them that their outlook isn't different or strange in fact it's perfectly normal | |||
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"Ask them which Munches they attend... And their Fet name.... that would probably eliminate the '50 shades" types (which we still havent watched) PS look carefully at our pics. There is a clear hierarchy in BDSM circles. People should know their place.
They should innately know everything. If they need to Google or ask questions they are weak and should be banished.
It's not possible to learn new desires later in life from reading books. Books can't teach anything.
I don't know if I would entirely agree with that. In some cases people have had for a long time a "feeling" that the couldn't explain or are not familiar with the scene. Sometimes asking questions or reading can help them understand their own feelings and show them that their outlook isn't different or strange in fact it's perfectly normal "I think that was tongue in cheek, I assume so otherwise is a load of bollocks | |||
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"Ask them which Munches they attend... And their Fet name.... that would probably eliminate the '50 shades" types (which we still havent watched) PS look carefully at our pics. There is a clear hierarchy in BDSM circles. People should know their place.
They should innately know everything. If they need to Google or ask questions they are weak and should be banished.
It's not possible to learn new desires later in life from reading books. Books can't teach anything. "Hahaha!! There's a reason I remained off scene for so long. I love it so but there's so much frickin snobbery surrounding BDSM | |||
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"Ask them which Munches they attend... And their Fet name.... that would probably eliminate the '50 shades" types (which we still havent watched) PS look carefully at our pics. There is a clear hierarchy in BDSM circles. People should know their place.
They should innately know everything. If they need to Google or ask questions they are weak and should be banished.
It's not possible to learn new desires later in life from reading books. Books can't teach anything.
Hahaha!!
There's a reason I remained off scene for so long. I love it so but there's so much frickin snobbery surrounding BDSM "I'm sure as I said above that was tongue in cheek, if it wasn't it's a load of bollocks | |||
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"Ask them which Munches they attend... And their Fet name.... that would probably eliminate the '50 shades" types (which we still havent watched) PS look carefully at our pics. There is a clear hierarchy in BDSM circles. People should know their place.
They should innately know everything. If they need to Google or ask questions they are weak and should be banished.
It's not possible to learn new desires later in life from reading books. Books can't teach anything.
I don't know if I would entirely agree with that. In some cases people have had for a long time a "feeling" that the couldn't explain or are not familiar with the scene. Sometimes asking questions or reading can help them understand their own feelings and show them that their outlook isn't different or strange in fact it's perfectly normal
I think that was tongue in cheek, I assume so otherwise is a load of bollocks " I was being sarcastic.  | |||
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"Ask them which Munches they attend... And their Fet name.... that would probably eliminate the '50 shades" types (which we still havent watched) PS look carefully at our pics. There is a clear hierarchy in BDSM circles. People should know their place.
They should innately know everything. If they need to Google or ask questions they are weak and should be banished.
It's not possible to learn new desires later in life from reading books. Books can't teach anything.
Hahaha!!
There's a reason I remained off scene for so long. I love it so but there's so much frickin snobbery surrounding BDSM "That was my point. x | |||
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"Ask them which Munches they attend... And their Fet name.... that would probably eliminate the '50 shades" types (which we still havent watched) PS look carefully at our pics. There is a clear hierarchy in BDSM circles. People should know their place.
They should innately know everything. If they need to Google or ask questions they are weak and should be banished.
It's not possible to learn new desires later in life from reading books. Books can't teach anything.
Hahaha!!
There's a reason I remained off scene for so long. I love it so but there's so much frickin snobbery surrounding BDSM
That was my point. x"Yeah I'm a lazy fucker so only read the last post in context it's very tongue in cheek hehe So I'll just go google my place now | |||
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"Ask them which Munches they attend... And their Fet name.... that would probably eliminate the '50 shades" types (which we still havent watched) PS look carefully at our pics. There is a clear hierarchy in BDSM circles. People should know their place.
They should innately know everything. If they need to Google or ask questions they are weak and should be banished.
It's not possible to learn new desires later in life from reading books. Books can't teach anything.
Hahaha!!
There's a reason I remained off scene for so long. I love it so but there's so much frickin snobbery surrounding BDSM "Some people can get eaten alive to a degree in a certain popular fet site which I can't name here but it can be intimidating for newcomers trying to avoid those within the scene who are either so superior they view anyone not as 'knowledgable' as inferior or those who are just pretending to get sex is good advice for any newcomer I'd say | |||
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"Ask them which Munches they attend... And their Fet name.... that would probably eliminate the '50 shades" types (which we still havent watched) PS look carefully at our pics. There is a clear hierarchy in BDSM circles. People should know their place.
They should innately know everything. If they need to Google or ask questions they are weak and should be banished.
It's not possible to learn new desires later in life from reading books. Books can't teach anything.
Hahaha!!
There's a reason I remained off scene for so long. I love it so but there's so much frickin snobbery surrounding BDSM
Some people can get eaten alive to a degree in a certain popular fet site which I can't name here but it can be intimidating for newcomers
trying to avoid those within the scene who are either so superior they view anyone not as 'knowledgable' as inferior or those who are just pretending to get sex is good advice for any newcomer I'd say"I was lucky I guess I found that fet site was really good for me I got contacted by some really good knowledgeable people very friendly and kind of took me under their wing gave me help advice and what to look out for red flags etc also if I needed advice I knew they'd be honest with me and they seem to look out for each other within the community x | |||
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"Ask them which Munches they attend... And their Fet name.... that would probably eliminate the '50 shades" types (which we still havent watched) PS look carefully at our pics. There is a clear hierarchy in BDSM circles. People should know their place.
They should innately know everything. If they need to Google or ask questions they are weak and should be banished.
It's not possible to learn new desires later in life from reading books. Books can't teach anything. "sorry scarlet i can't agree with that which is very unusual for me because i think you normally talk sense in your posts . i can only speak for myself here i knew i was different the moment i had sex for the first time. you see nothing happened by that i mean i got hard but didn't climax the girl in question ask me to stop after about a hour of sex . she thought i was great i thought i was a freak after all my mates and their older brothers had told me sex was great and i wouldn't last thirty seconds when a girl finally took pity on me and fucked me . the truth was way different i was 13 she told her girl friends after about 6 sexual encounters and still no orgasm for me she and her mates began to tease me saying i must be gay not really into girls . teenagers can be hurtful i knew i wasn't gay or bisexual my mind just wouldn't switch off during sex nor was i ever truly in the moment . their teasing made me very mistrustful of girls so much so i became very very hard to bed a very unusual trait in a teenage boy. i began to believe i was a freak had something wrong with me no internet back then i ended up in the library reading about sexual disfunctions when a came across a book called spanking the maid it blew my mind and set me on the path to finding my true sexuality and place in the world . | |||
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"Ask them which Munches they attend... And their Fet name.... that would probably eliminate the '50 shades" types (which we still havent watched) PS look carefully at our pics. There is a clear hierarchy in BDSM circles. People should know their place.
They should innately know everything. If they need to Google or ask questions they are weak and should be banished.
It's not possible to learn new desires later in life from reading books. Books can't teach anything.
sorry scarlet i can't agree with that which is very unusual for me because i think you normally talk sense in your posts .
i can only speak for myself here i knew i was different the moment i had sex for the first time.
you see nothing happened by that i mean i got hard but didn't climax the girl in question ask me to stop after about a hour of sex .
she thought i was great i thought i was a freak after all my mates and their older brothers had told me sex was great and i wouldn't last thirty seconds when a girl finally took pity on me and fucked me .
the truth was way different i was 13 she told her girl friends after about 6 sexual encounters and still no orgasm for me she and her mates began to tease me saying i must be gay not really into girls .
teenagers can be hurtful i knew i wasn't gay or bisexual my mind just wouldn't switch off during sex nor was i ever truly in the moment .
their teasing made me very mistrustful of girls so much so i became very very hard to bed a very unusual trait in a teenage boy.
i began to believe i was a freak had something wrong with me no internet back then i ended up in the library reading about sexual disfunctions when a came across a book called spanking the maid it blew my mind and set me on the path to finding my true sexuality and place in the world .
"That's exactly how I've felt much of my adult life , strange, freaky weird. Until I discovered the world of bdsm and d/s dynamic. It to me is more than experimentation it's a deep pshycological need that I feel I need to discover to find myself, not many will relate but some will x | |||
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"Ask them which Munches they attend... And their Fet name.... that would probably eliminate the '50 shades" types (which we still havent watched) PS look carefully at our pics. There is a clear hierarchy in BDSM circles. People should know their place.
They should innately know everything. If they need to Google or ask questions they are weak and should be banished.
It's not possible to learn new desires later in life from reading books. Books can't teach anything.
sorry scarlet i can't agree with that which is very unusual for me because i think you normally talk sense in your posts .
i can only speak for myself here i knew i was different the moment i had sex for the first time.
you see nothing happened by that i mean i got hard but didn't climax the girl in question ask me to stop after about a hour of sex .
she thought i was great i thought i was a freak after all my mates and their older brothers had told me sex was great and i wouldn't last thirty seconds when a girl finally took pity on me and fucked me .
the truth was way different i was 13 she told her girl friends after about 6 sexual encounters and still no orgasm for me she and her mates began to tease me saying i must be gay not really into girls .
teenagers can be hurtful i knew i wasn't gay or bisexual my mind just wouldn't switch off during sex nor was i ever truly in the moment .
their teasing made me very mistrustful of girls so much so i became very very hard to bed a very unusual trait in a teenage boy.
i began to believe i was a freak had something wrong with me no internet back then i ended up in the library reading about sexual disfunctions when a came across a book called spanking the maid it blew my mind and set me on the path to finding my true sexuality and place in the world .
That's exactly how I've felt much of my adult life , strange, freaky weird. Until I discovered the world of bdsm and d/s dynamic. It to me is more than experimentation it's a deep pshycological need that I feel I need to discover to find myself, not many will relate but some will x"i was friends with that feeling for a long time made me very self reflective which is no bad thing really as the true path to happiness is knowing ones self and becoming at ease with what one discovers when reflecting on who one is . | |||
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"It just depends on there who you chat to - I've chatted to loads of really nice people on there who would be excellent friends and guides - there's a few people on there with massive superiority complexes but they can usually be easily avoided!" There are plenty of dimdoms on there too that have read THAT book and think they know it all. They don't tend to last that long though. I found most people on there to be very helpful and met and made some great friends too. | |||
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"I'm disappointed that this thread isn't about Tom Bombadil" Ring a dong dillo | |||
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"What does intrigue me is why we like it so much and crave the physical punishments men dish out. " And mental domination. | |||
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"What does intrigue me is why we like it so much and crave the physical punishments men dish out. " but a dom wouldnt be punishing you with sonething you enjoy and would have found out what makes you a submissive so the relationship can be personal to you | |||
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"What does intrigue me is why we like it so much and crave the physical punishments men dish out. but a dom wouldnt be punishing you with sonething you enjoy and would have found out what makes you a submissive so the relationship can be personal to you" I'm talking more about a dominant relationship than a Dom. Why do I crave the pain? It's not punishment per se,but I don't discourage it. I'm a naturally passive person who doesn't like conflict,but he excites me. I've never had a conversation with him about being a submissive. | |||
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"What does intrigue me is why we like it so much and crave the physical punishments men dish out. but a dom wouldnt be punishing you with sonething you enjoy and would have found out what makes you a submissive so the relationship can be personal to you I'm talking more about a dominant relationship than a Dom. Why do I crave the pain? It's not punishment per se,but I don't discourage it. I'm a naturally passive person who doesn't like conflict,but he excites me. I've never had a conversation with him about being a submissive. " only you can find your own answers to that | |||
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"What does intrigue me is why we like it so much and crave the physical punishments men dish out. but a dom wouldnt be punishing you with sonething you enjoy and would have found out what makes you a submissive so the relationship can be personal to you I'm talking more about a dominant relationship than a Dom. Why do I crave the pain? It's not punishment per se,but I don't discourage it. I'm a naturally passive person who doesn't like conflict,but he excites me. I've never had a conversation with him about being a submissive. only you can find your own answers to that" A psychologist might be helpful | |||
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