FabSwingers.com forum: What happened to being spontaneous?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

what happened to being spontaneous now a days or is it just me that finds it a turn on? I get that a lot of ladies like to build up a connection and have socials etc first and i'm all for that but every now and again is it just guys that get the massive horn and want to go and play with the next hot lady they chat to??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People seam to spontaneously block me does that count

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"what happened to being spontaneous now a days or is it just me that finds it a turn on? I get that a lot of ladies like to build up a connection and have socials etc first and i'm all for that but every now and again is it just guys that get the massive horn and want to go and play with the next hot lady they chat to??"

Spontaneous is great, for me personally it's hard to do! Pesky children

but I've done spontaneous and it's been out of this world!

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

I get horny, sure, but I'd have to have an exceptionally good feeling about someone to want to meet immediately for sex.

Firstly, there's my safety to consider.

Secondly, a guy being hot is not enough to make me want to fuck him.

I also prefer to feel prepared for a meet. I like the time to ensure I am scrubbed, buffed and polished with my nails done, the outfit I've had time to choose and so on.

I'd feel rushed and thrown together if I just showered and dashed out to meet someone. I'd feel uncomfortable and wouldn't enjoy it.

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By *hangovCouple
over a year ago

sheffield

I find spontaneity difficult but I am planning on doing some soon.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I really wish I could be spontaneous but my circumstances just don't allow it ...

Back to the drawing board

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

That's a man thing.

When men are horny, it's NOW.

Try a little planning. You can always be spontaneous in the bedroom

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Safety would be my main concern, unfortunately. However I did have a spontaneous meet with a guy I'd met before on Sunday and it was excellent

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm easy with spontaneity. The problem is, every time anybody messages me for a spontaneous get together, it's always at an inconvenient time.

I guess that means I'm not as spontaneous as I thought!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always regret spontaneous meets. Always. I don't do it now to avoid safety issues and disappointment.

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"I always regret spontaneous meets. Always. I don't do it now to avoid safety issues and disappointment. "

This is also a danger

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Boo!

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

For me, spontaneous requires at least an hour's notice so I can glam up

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"People seam to spontaneously block me does that count

I think it's the pink hat

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By *ed LipstickWoman
over a year ago

Fucksville

"I get horny, sure, but I'd have to have an exceptionally good feeling about someone to want to meet immediately for sex.

Firstly, there's my safety to consider.

Secondly, a guy being hot is not enough to make me want to fuck him.

I also prefer to feel prepared for a meet. I like the time to ensure I am scrubbed, buffed and polished with my nails done, the outfit I've had time to choose and so on.

I'd feel rushed and thrown together if I just showered and dashed out to meet someone. I'd feel uncomfortable and wouldn't enjoy it."

This for me too. I can do spontaneous at clubs though

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I get horny, sure, but I'd have to have an exceptionally good feeling about someone to want to meet immediately for sex.

Firstly, there's my safety to consider.

Secondly, a guy being hot is not enough to make me want to fuck him.

I also prefer to feel prepared for a meet. I like the time to ensure I am scrubbed, buffed and polished with my nails done, the outfit I've had time to choose and so on.

I'd feel rushed and thrown together if I just showered and dashed out to meet someone. I'd feel uncomfortable and wouldn't enjoy it."

You could always meet at his in the shower and both get lathered up

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I really wish I could be spontaneous but my circumstances just don't allow it ...

Back to the drawing board

That's what I find with most unfortunately

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A good number of women can be spontaneous. Many of the women I've had impulsive fun with I've then gone on to meet under more planned circumstances.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have a little circle of friends that we can be spontaneous with and meet at short notice.

But with new people we find that doesn't fit in with how we like to do things.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"That's a man thing.

When men are horny, it's NOW.

Try a little planning. You can always be spontaneous in the bedroom

I'm all for the planned meets but sometimes there's a little too much planning and it doesn't end up meeting expectations

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I used to but I'm older now so I can't move as fast.

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales

Ermm you could always go to a club or meet through here first..have a play etc..

Then phone rings "Fancy a fck like now!"

Is that not spontanious? But without the associated worries..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I plan to be spontaneous next Tuesday.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Safety would be my main concern, unfortunately. However I did have a spontaneous meet with a guy I'd met before on Sunday and it was excellent

I think that would be everyone's concern, it would even be in the back of my mind as a man....that's why I'd only meet verified people

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I always regret spontaneous meets. Always. I don't do it now to avoid safety issues and disappointment. "

Why the regrets though?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" I want sex now, stop Fannying about ladies, I'm not your boyfriend nor want to be. is it just guys that get the massive horn and want to go and play with the next lady or table leg they chat to??"

Fixed that for you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm very spontaneous it just takes me 54 messages and a couple of weeks

I mean I've just posted on here, right now and didn't dilly dally at all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But seriously though...i had a spontaneous meet last night actually.

Was at work, felt like i needed to release a bit of sexual tension so i texted someone i met a few months ago.

An hour later, we were going at it like rabbits!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have a life beyond meeting random strangers for sex. Our time for play is rare and requires too much effort and organisation to risk wasting it on someone we haven't vetted beforehand.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm sooooo impatient **** I always want things right now

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"I get horny, sure, but I'd have to have an exceptionally good feeling about someone to want to meet immediately for sex.

Firstly, there's my safety to consider.

Secondly, a guy being hot is not enough to make me want to fuck him.

I also prefer to feel prepared for a meet. I like the time to ensure I am scrubbed, buffed and polished with my nails done, the outfit I've had time to choose and so on.

I'd feel rushed and thrown together if I just showered and dashed out to meet someone. I'd feel uncomfortable and wouldn't enjoy it.

You could always meet at his in the shower and both get lathered up

You've missed my point. Just showering is not enough. I need time to prepare properly.

Guys don't understand this but then you don't have to consider if your legs and other bits are shaved or if your nails are done. You don't have to consider putting on makeup, styling your hair, choosing lingerie, making sure you have stockings and the rest.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We have a life beyond meeting random strangers for sex. Our time for play is rare and requires too much effort and organisation to risk wasting it on someone we haven't vetted beforehand."

Yes but you're a couple so you can at least have spontaneous sex with each other! I'm not jealous...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I get horny, sure, but I'd have to have an exceptionally good feeling about someone to want to meet immediately for sex.

Firstly, there's my safety to consider.

Secondly, a guy being hot is not enough to make me want to fuck him.

I also prefer to feel prepared for a meet. I like the time to ensure I am scrubbed, buffed and polished with my nails done, the outfit I've had time to choose and so on.

I'd feel rushed and thrown together if I just showered and dashed out to meet someone. I'd feel uncomfortable and wouldn't enjoy it.

You could always meet at his in the shower and both get lathered up

You've missed my point. Just showering is not enough. I need time to prepare properly.

I don't consider half of that and I'm a woman too

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We have a life beyond meeting random strangers for sex. Our time for play is rare and requires too much effort and organisation to risk wasting it on someone we haven't vetted beforehand.

Yes but you're a couple so you can at least have spontaneous sex with each other! I'm not jealous...

Well being in a couple takes effort of it's own. Nor can you demand sex on tap from your partner.

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"We have a life beyond meeting random strangers for sex. Our time for play is rare and requires too much effort and organisation to risk wasting it on someone we haven't vetted beforehand.

Yes but you're a couple so you can at least have spontaneous sex with each other! I'm not jealous...

Well being in a couple takes effort of it's own. Nor can you demand sex on tap from your partner."

What?!

What's the point of a partner if you can't demand sex?!

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales

"We have a life beyond meeting random strangers for sex. Our time for play is rare and requires too much effort and organisation to risk wasting it on someone we haven't vetted beforehand.

Yes but you're a couple so you can at least have spontaneous sex with each other! I'm not jealous...

I can't H is at work till ten thirty...So....anyone want to come round.....and babysit the kids so I can go out on my bike??

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

I think some guys really think women are glamed up, freshly shaven or waxed, styled and groomed and ready to meet at the drop of a hat 24/7.

Most of us have lives you know? We have families, jobs, responsibilities.

Guys say oh I don't care what you look like, come as you are but they really aren't picturing the leggings and t-shirt, covered in cat hair, that I've been wearing to do whatever chores or DIY or whatever I've been doing. They're not imagining the no make up, chipped nail varnish and legs that need epilating.

I really don't want to turn up to a meet feeling rough and knowing I look rough, like I've made no effort (because I haven't).

The spontaneous meet might scratch an itch but I don't want to be the rough meet they talk about with their mates afterwards.

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"I get horny, sure, but I'd have to have an exceptionally good feeling about someone to want to meet immediately for sex.

Firstly, there's my safety to consider.

Secondly, a guy being hot is not enough to make me want to fuck him.

I also prefer to feel prepared for a meet. I like the time to ensure I am scrubbed, buffed and polished with my nails done, the outfit I've had time to choose and so on.

I'd feel rushed and thrown together if I just showered and dashed out to meet someone. I'd feel uncomfortable and wouldn't enjoy it.

You could always meet at his in the shower and both get lathered up

You've missed my point. Just showering is not enough. I need time to prepare properly.

I don't consider half of that and I'm a woman too

That's fine, we're all different.

I'm explaining why I don't feel comfortable doing spontaneous meets and the things I have to think about that guys probably never consider.

I don't, personally, style my hair, because it's a lost cause but I do like it freshly washed for a meet. When I'm at home studying, I'll only wash it every 2 or 3 days because it wrecks the condition to do it every day. So just in terms of freshly washed hair, I am meet-ready 2-3 days per week.

I am also happy to meet without makeup but I know many women who aren't.

Guys tend to shower, maybe shave, splash on some smell, put on clean clothes and (hopefully) check they have condoms.

It's a bit easier to meet immediately when that's all the preparation needed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I get horny, sure, but I'd have to have an exceptionally good feeling about someone to want to meet immediately for sex.

Firstly, there's my safety to consider.

Secondly, a guy being hot is not enough to make me want to fuck him.

I also prefer to feel prepared for a meet. I like the time to ensure I am scrubbed, buffed and polished with my nails done, the outfit I've had time to choose and so on.

I'd feel rushed and thrown together if I just showered and dashed out to meet someone. I'd feel uncomfortable and wouldn't enjoy it.

You could always meet at his in the shower and both get lathered up

You've missed my point. Just showering is not enough. I need time to prepare properly.

I don't consider half of that and I'm a woman too

That's fine, we're all different.

I'm explaining why I don't feel comfortable doing spontaneous meets and the things I have to think about that guys probably never consider.

I am also happy to meet without makeup but I know many women who aren't.

Guys tend to shower, maybe shave, splash on some smell, put on clean clothes and (hopefully) check they have condoms.

It's a bit easier to meet immediately when that's all the preparation needed."

Maybe you're underestimating the prep many guys and many women do on a daily basis just to feel comfortable within themselves on their working day.

Not everybody needs a huge amount of additional preparation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is why there's so many straight guys sucking each other off in dogging spots.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

last club visit we saw a couple in a mingle of bodies - i sat on the edge of the bed and stroked the lovely ladies bum - what we all got up to next was very spur of the moment - so we dont plan everything all the time - its fun not to

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Spontaneous does nothing for me... I talk to people for a while before we meet - I talked to my last meet for five months before we met! - and even with a repeat meet I like arranging things in advance. I like the anticipation.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

that next hot lady could be an axe murderer....

or more likely on here... that next "hot lady" is a man, who could be an axe murderer......

some men just think with their cocks too much..... and the potential reward is worth the risks.....

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"I get horny, sure, but I'd have to have an exceptionally good feeling about someone to want to meet immediately for sex.

Firstly, there's my safety to consider.

Secondly, a guy being hot is not enough to make me want to fuck him.

I also prefer to feel prepared for a meet. I like the time to ensure I am scrubbed, buffed and polished with my nails done, the outfit I've had time to choose and so on.

I'd feel rushed and thrown together if I just showered and dashed out to meet someone. I'd feel uncomfortable and wouldn't enjoy it.

You could always meet at his in the shower and both get lathered up

You've missed my point. Just showering is not enough. I need time to prepare properly.

I don't consider half of that and I'm a woman too

That's fine, we're all different.

I'm explaining why I don't feel comfortable doing spontaneous meets and the things I have to think about that guys probably never consider.

I am also happy to meet without makeup but I know many women who aren't.

Guys tend to shower, maybe shave, splash on some smell, put on clean clothes and (hopefully) check they have condoms.

It's a bit easier to meet immediately when that's all the preparation needed.

Maybe you're underestimating the prep many guys and many women do on a daily basis just to feel comfortable within themselves on their working day.

Not everybody needs a huge amount of additional preparation. "

Most men don't, I agree.

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

This is why there's so many straight guys sucking each other off in dogging spots."

So true!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The good thing about doing my socials is that there's a few guys I could certainly be spontaneous for.

xxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

that next hot lady could be an axe murderer....

or more likely on here... that next "hot lady" is a man, who could be an axe murderer......

some men just think with their cocks too much..... and the potential reward is worth the risks....."

You've commented about potential risks on a few of my posts recently.....you don't work for health and safety by any chance do you?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 03/08/16 11:53:25]

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

This is why there's so many straight guys sucking each other off in dogging spots.

Is it?? Ewwww!!!!

So true!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just had grilled halloumi with mushrooms on ciabbatta.

(regrets not being spontaneous on bread choices before now!)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I just had grilled halloumi with mushrooms on ciabbatta.

(regrets not being spontaneous on bread choices before now!)"

That sound amazing....correct choice with the ciabatta in my opinion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I get horny, sure, but I'd have to have an exceptionally good feeling about someone to want to meet immediately for sex.

Firstly, there's my safety to consider.

Secondly, a guy being hot is not enough to make me want to fuck him.

I also prefer to feel prepared for a meet. I like the time to ensure I am scrubbed, buffed and polished with my nails done, the outfit I've had time to choose and so on.

I'd feel rushed and thrown together if I just showered and dashed out to meet someone. I'd feel uncomfortable and wouldn't enjoy it.

You could always meet at his in the shower and both get lathered up

You've missed my point. Just showering is not enough. I need time to prepare properly.

Some men think women are dressed like that all the time. XXX

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I get horny, sure, but I'd have to have an exceptionally good feeling about someone to want to meet immediately for sex.

Firstly, there's my safety to consider.

Secondly, a guy being hot is not enough to make me want to fuck him.

I also prefer to feel prepared for a meet. I like the time to ensure I am scrubbed, buffed and polished with my nails done, the outfit I've had time to choose and so on.

I'd feel rushed and thrown together if I just showered and dashed out to meet someone. I'd feel uncomfortable and wouldn't enjoy it.

You could always meet at his in the shower and both get lathered up

You've missed my point. Just showering is not enough. I need time to prepare properly.

Some men think women are dressed like that all the time. XXX"

Maybe some women under estimate men, yes we all like a glammed up lady but I honestly mean it when I say you could turn up in your scraggy trackies with hair all over the place as long as you're "fresh" it wouldn't bother me.....I wouldn't plan on staying clothes for long anyway

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We have a life beyond meeting random strangers for sex. Our time for play is rare and requires too much effort and organisation to risk wasting it on someone we haven't vetted beforehand.

Yes but you're a couple so you can at least have spontaneous sex with each other! I'm not jealous...

Well being in a couple takes effort of it's own. Nor can you demand sex on tap from your partner.

What?!

What's the point of a partner if you can't demand sex?!

Well, you can demand it, getting it is another story

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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

no spontaneous fun for me due to two facts one I'm never free to meet at the drop of a hat which is fine .the kind of fun I like demands a connection so no spontaneous I've got a hard on who can sort me out meets for me.plus at least three socials or sometimes more before we even have a trail run of fun we both like .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It does make me laugh when I get messages asking to meet now.

I point out that usually neither of us can accommodate and I don't drive and I don't like car meets anyway so when I ask where this spontaneous meet is going to occur, they can't answer me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I will answer later

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By *andsonjohnMan
over a year ago

in the eye of the storm

"It does make me laugh when I get messages asking to meet now.

I point out that usually neither of us can accommodate and I don't drive and I don't like car meets anyway so when I ask where this spontaneous meet is going to occur, they can't answer me

I'm surprized that after having the bare faced cheek to believe women meet at the drop of a hat they don't follow through by answering your question about where this spontaneous meets going occur with.

in knickers of coarse

but then again they would demand a sense of wit and a bit of brain something they have already shown the lack by thinking a single woman is stupid enough to meet a stranger at the drop of a hat.

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By *lik and PaulCouple
over a year ago

cahoots

"I find spontaneity difficult but I am planning on doing some soon."

Funny

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By *GHertsCouple
over a year ago

North Herts

Spontaneous with someone you've met before (so no safety worries) might potentially be great ... providing that coincided with already being minimally groomed! I'd be happy enough to take a quick shower, apply a bit of eyeliner and perfume, forgetting 'styling' my hair, doing my nails or getting especially dressed up but there's no way I'd meet with legs - and other places - looking like they belonged to an orangutan. I know some guys, or other women for that matter, might brush your concerns away but as a previous poster said, few of us would like to take the risk of being thought of as a rough old shag. More importantly, I know I'd feel so horribly self conscious that all the excitement of a spontaneous meet would be cancelled out anyway.

Give me an hour or so - if that's not too unspontaneous - and I might be up for one though ... !

Ms G

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Spontaneous with someone you've met before (so no safety worries) might potentially be great ... providing that coincided with already being minimally groomed! I'd be happy enough to take a quick shower, apply a bit of eyeliner and perfume, forgetting 'styling' my hair, doing my nails or getting especially dressed up but there's no way I'd meet with legs - and other places - looking like they belonged to an orangutan. I know some guys, or other women for that matter, might brush your concerns away but as a previous poster said, few of us would like to take the risk of being thought of as a rough old shag. More importantly, I know I'd feel so horribly self conscious that all the excitement of a spontaneous meet would be cancelled out anyway.

Give me an hour or so - if that's not too unspontaneous - and I might be up for one though ... !

Ms G"

An hour or so is spontaneous enough, to be fair I'd consider 12 hours pretty spontaneous, I could be chatting to someone from morning to evening getting on really well then happen to suggest we meet for a drink (yes I do mean a spontaneous social as well) the usual response I get is maybe in a few weeks when I have a spare evening. I know people are busy as am I but I get rapidly bored of the messages backwards and forwards for weeks on end and usually find I lose interest if that drags on without sign of a meet.....maybe Its a reflection on me I don't know lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Give me an hour or so - if that's not too unspontaneous - and I might be up for one though ... !

Ms G

I often meet for a drink like this. A spontaneous social meet is fine but the meet now messages are always about meeting for sex.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I also prefer to feel prepared for a meet. I like the time to ensure I am scrubbed, buffed and polished with my nails done, the outfit I've had time to choose and so on.

What? I thought all women were always trimmed, shaved, scrubbed, buffed, and polished, with full make up and dressed ready for sexual encounters at all times...

Why else would L have made me install a second bathroom so I can rinse myself off in cold water (all the hot went in her bath)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not everybody has the time to drop everything for a shag when they are horny

I'm a single mum working two jobs I meet about once every couple of months simply because that all I have time to meet, I'd love a more active sex life but real life gets in the way

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Spontaneous can be great, if you have no barriers and absolutely everyone is a complete match for you.

In the real world, many of us have many other things going on, apart from just being able to get shagged senseless. And often we're not in the vicinity of a safe haven for the sex. Plus it's likely that most people who contact us are just not the right match.

If you absolutely must have only spontaneous meets, then go along to a club at a busy time and hope that others find you appropriate for their desires.

Or develop relationships, so that you all can get together at spontaneous human sexual combustion moments. It'll help if they're just seconds from you.

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By *urpurseCouple
over a year ago

North West

Clearly what we need to do is help each other out by looking after each other's children while we go on spontaneous meets, like a babysitting circle!!! At least there would be no questions from the babysitter!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i love spontaneous. unfortuantely had a couple of dodgy experiences so i only meet trusted guys now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Love spontaneity.

How ever life / work events get in the way. I know exactly what I'd be doing right now if I could (sorry Fabers but it wouldn't be looking and posting on the forums)

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