FabSwingers.com forum: Name and shame the Colgate way!

By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

Get it off your chest people, spew out all your bike and angst!

For those of you out there who have met me or those of you that haven't, tell all your tallest story about the alleged escapades and heinous dirty deeds that I may or may not have committed when we did or didn't meet!

Did I not wipe my feet on the way in? Did I wipe my dick on the curtains? Leave a used condom hanging out of the letterbox as I left the premises?

Was i escorted out by two burley bouncers with the sound of sirens approaching?

Spill the beans, people need to know

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Couldn't stop Knitter and kinky putting ribbons in my hair. You were no help. I saw the fear in your eyes.

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By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

"Couldn't stop Knitter and kinky putting ribbons in my hair. You were no help. I saw the fear in your eyes. "

I was paid to turn a blind eye

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Couldn't stop Knitter and kinky putting ribbons in my hair. You were no help. I saw the fear in your eyes.

I was paid to turn a blind eye

It still hurts. You saw what they did. Animals the pair of them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Where is Knitter gone btw

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Where is Knitter gone btw

Holiday

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By *odareyouMan
over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

Last meet I saw you at you were combing your pubes with the ladies toothbrush...

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By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

I met Colgate once and he forced me to eat donuts off his thumbs the utter cad

them we played a game of strip poker until we were naked all but for our hats, after that despicable things ensued

I'm not here to shame him, I'm just waiting for another go

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By *alacious RedWoman
over a year ago

croydon

I met Colgate, he inserted a bayonet light bulb up my butt! I'm still wondering ........... If he took it out the lamp 1st

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By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

"I met Colgate, he inserted a bayonet light bulb up my butt! I'm still wondering ........... If he took it out the lamp 1st

Can I have the extension lead back please?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've met Colgate socially.

Twice.

He's awright I s'pose.

If I'd known he was going to be at the second social I'd have stayed home and washed me socks though.

On the flipside his guide dog is lovely.

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Happy birthday matey

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

If I were any more relaxed, my dear man, I'd slip into a coma.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dFdas-kMF74

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

"Get it off your chest people, spew out all your bike and angst!

Did I not wipe my feet on the way in? Did I wipe my dick on the curtains? Leave a used condom hanging out of the letterbox as I left the premises?

Was i escorted out by two burley bouncers with the sound of sirens approaching?

Spill the beans, people need to know

He smothered his naked body in peanut butter and made me chase him around. When I finally caught him, it was crunchy and not smooth!

I mean who buys crunchy! Timewaster!

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By *alacious RedWoman
over a year ago

croydon

"I met Colgate, he inserted a bayonet light bulb up my butt! I'm still wondering ........... If he took it out the lamp 1st

Can I have the extension lead back please?"
can I keep the plug? Bulb still works & still a tad warm! Now let me out the cupboard please.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I met _olgate under his old user name,

Minty fresh - 25 year old female virgin , Blonde with huge tits,

Turned out to be a total lie,

32A tits are not huge

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Colgate said he'd fuck me senseless over a car bonnet. Then he fucked off.

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By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

"Colgate said he'd fuck me senseless over a car bonnet. Then he fucked off.

I'd do it again too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Where is Knitter gone btw

Holiday "

That makes sense

, thanks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Remember when I caught you taking a new pair of pants out of a 3 pack in Asda,and putting your worn pair back in their place?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never met him. Have I missed much ?

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

"Never met him. Have I missed much ?"

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

I met Colgate for lunch and he just spewed a bike

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By *randMrs Spanish BrunetteCouple
over a year ago

home sweet home

We have not met him yet. But he's the boom. And we love him

MrsSB

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I heard he was a Swinger.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

He tweaked my bicep and said 'not as muscular as your arse' and did a moue

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

"He tweaked my bicep and said 'not as muscular as your arse' and did a moue

Do you need a boobie cuddle to get over it Steve?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never met him. Have I missed much ?

That's alright then ......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I heard he was a Swinger.

I heard he's a swinger.

But it's spelt minger.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Couldn't stop Knitter and kinky putting ribbons in my hair. You were no help. I saw the fear in your eyes.

I was paid to turn a blind eye

It still hurts. You saw what they did. Animals the pair of them."

Hey you loved it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Where is Knitter gone btw

Hey Handsome did you miss me ?

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By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

"Where is Knitter gone btw

Hey Handsome did you miss me ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Where is Knitter gone btw

Hey Handsome did you miss me ?

No"

I wasnt asking you grumpy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Couldn't stop Knitter and kinky putting ribbons in my hair. You were no help. I saw the fear in your eyes.

I was paid to turn a blind eye

It still hurts. You saw what they did. Animals the pair of them.

Hey you loved it

I don't deny that.

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By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

"Where is Knitter gone btw

Hey Handsome did you miss me ?

I wasnt asking you grumpy

You got my tuppence worth anyway, free of charge too

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"I heard he was a Swinger.

Definitely! Around the pole, I seem to remember. Not from the chandeliers or a rope but definitely swinging.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Where is Knitter gone btw

Hey Handsome did you miss me ?

I wasnt asking you grumpy

You got my tuppence worth anyway, free of charge too

Just admit it you've missed me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Where is Knitter gone btw

Hey Handsome did you miss me ?

I wasnt asking you grumpy

You got my tuppence worth anyway, free of charge too

Just admit it you've missed me

I have

. Felt weird here without you, the kindness/niceness balance was messed up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Where is Knitter gone btw

Hey Handsome did you miss me ?

I wasnt asking you grumpy

You got my tuppence worth anyway, free of charge too

Just admit it you've missed me

I have

. Felt weird here without you, the kindness/niceness balance was messed up

Knitter and balance aren't words you normally see in the same sentence. Specially if she's had a drop of grappa.....

Missing yoo my wuv.....

Hope you're enjoying your holibobs. Mwah.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Where is Knitter gone btw

Hey Handsome did you miss me ?

I wasnt asking you grumpy

You got my tuppence worth anyway, free of charge too

Just admit it you've missed me

I have

. Felt weird here without you, the kindness/niceness balance was messed up

Well I'll pop in when I can but there is lots of niceness in here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Where is Knitter gone btw

Hey Handsome did you miss me ?

I wasnt asking you grumpy

You got my tuppence worth anyway, free of charge too

Just admit it you've missed me

I have

. Felt weird here without you, the kindness/niceness balance was messed up

Knitter and balance aren't words you normally see in the same sentence. Specially if she's had a drop of grappa.....

Missing yoo my wuv.....

Hope you're enjoying your holibobs. Mwah. "

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

"Happy birthday matey

Happy Birthday to you,

Happy Birthday dear Colgate,

Happy Birthday to you...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Where is Knitter gone btw

Hey Handsome did you miss me ?

I wasnt asking you grumpy

You got my tuppence worth anyway, free of charge too

Just admit it you've missed me

I have

. Felt weird here without you, the kindness/niceness balance was messed up

Well I'll pop in when I can but there is lots of niceness in here

Yeah, enjoy your holidays

Perdita has been so nice to me... no worries

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"Couldn't stop Knitter and kinky putting ribbons in my hair. You were no help. I saw the fear in your eyes.

I was paid to turn a blind eye

It still hurts. You saw what they did. Animals the pair of them.

Hey you loved it

He so did

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

Colgate got us thrown out of a bar

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 25/07/16 22:35:20]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Couldn't stop Knitter and kinky putting ribbons in my hair. You were no help. I saw the fear in your eyes.

I was paid to turn a blind eye

It still hurts. You saw what they did. Animals the pair of them.

Hey you loved it

He so did

I've already said I did. Two lovely ladies playing with my hair, who wouldn't love that?

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

"Get it off your chest people, spew out all your bike and angst!

Did I not wipe my feet on the way in? Did I wipe my dick on the curtains? Leave a used condom hanging out of the letterbox as I left the premises?

Was i escorted out by two burley bouncers with the sound of sirens approaching?

Spill the beans, people need to know

No no no, you don't want folk knowing THAT story, do you?

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By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

Yep! That one too, don't leave out any of the salacious details

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Get it off your chest people, spew out all your bike and angst!

Did I not wipe my feet on the way in? Did I wipe my dick on the curtains? Leave a used condom hanging out of the letterbox as I left the premises?

Was i escorted out by two burley bouncers with the sound of sirens approaching?

Spill the beans, people need to know

I've met Collate, he's an aunt.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Grrrrrr prudish autocarot.... he's NOT an aunt.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Iv got the feeling hes a little puddycat

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By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

"Grrrrrr prudish autocarot.... he's NOT an aunt....."

I have not undergone gender reassignment

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Grrrrrr prudish autocarot.... he's NOT an aunt.....

I have not undergone gender reassignment "

Don't blame me for my prudish autocarrot.

I keep trying to type "Colgate is a aunt", but autocarrot changes aunt to aunt every time.

I honestly don't think your an aunt, I think you're a complete aunt......

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By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

There is truth in that statement but I'm ducked if I can find it

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By *iSTARessWoman
over a year ago

London

Met him at a social.

Nice guy but not as funny as he likes to think he is

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I met Colgate once, he said that my long hair made me look like a hippy and he wanted to put flowers in my hair. He neglected to mention beforehand he meant a wreath.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There is truth in that statement but I'm ducked if I can find it

I think I've got it sorted now;

Colgate is a ducking punt.

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By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

"Met him at a social.

Nice guy but not as funny as he likes to think he is "

Humour is a serious business

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not a fan.

Prefer sensodyne

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"He tweaked my bicep and said 'not as muscular as your arse' and did a moue

Do you need a boobie cuddle to get over it Steve?

I do. I really do.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Colgate came to visit Titz Towers last week and it has taken the minions and I 5 days to get over it. The fun began when Colgate ignored the monorail that leads deep into my extinct volcano (address no 3, Magma Sidings) and instead used a ruddy skateboard, the rattling of which really ignored Mr and Mrs Jong Un in their Summer cottage (no 2, Magma Sidings). Upon arrival, he ate all of the choc ices, interrupted a missile launch by insisting on us all going on a picnic, instead of trying to achieve world domination through controlling the Mr Whippy brand and then to top it all, someone put a Chubby Brown dvd on, rendering the secret base uninhabitable until it had finished. He then left, carrying the mangle.

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By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

"Colgate came to visit Titz Towers last week and it has taken the minions and I 5 days to get over it. The fun began when Colgate ignored the monorail that leads deep into my extinct volcano (address no 3, Magma Sidings) and instead used a ruddy skateboard, the rattling of which really ignored Mr and Mrs Jong Un in their Summer cottage (no 2, Magma Sidings). Upon arrival, he ate all of the choc ices, interrupted a missile launch by insisting on us all going on a picnic, instead of trying to achieve world domination through controlling the Mr Whippy brand and then to top it all, someone put a Chubby Brown dvd on, rendering the secret base uninhabitable until it had finished. He then left, carrying the mangle. "

I had a pressing engagement

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Grrrrrr prudish autocarot.... he's NOT an aunt.....

I have not undergone gender reassignment

Don't blame me for my prudish autocarrot.

I keep trying to type "Colgate is a aunt", but autocarrot changes aunt to aunt every time.

I honestly don't think your an aunt, I think you're a complete aunt......"

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By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

That's quite auntish

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Be humbled by the bicep, my good man

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By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

"Be humbled by the bicep, my good man

It looks like you have a willy growing out of your elbow

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