FabSwingers.com forum: Straw poll: "Hi, how are you?"

By *LUK OP Couple
over a year ago

Loughborough

Just wondering what % of the emails you receive solely consist of the thread title (or variations thereof)?

We've even put in our profile " Also to save you asking "How are you both?" We are just dandy." yet I would say at least 60% of the messages we receive are still "Hi, how are you?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dunno. Don't count.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What should they put in a first mail?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What should they put in a first mail?"

"You are awesome and I want to fuck you."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

less than 10 mails a day have this messages. most of them are complimenting me on something sexual about me.

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

"What should they put in a first mail?

"You are awesome and I want to fuck you."

takes notes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What should they put in a first mail?

"You are awesome and I want to fuck you."

I got one of those mails once. Then they realised they'd clicked on the wrong profile.

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

Depends on whether or not I'm bored enough to play hunt the sausage with some dickhead random

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well how do we start a conversation with anyone on here then ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't get mail from strangers just get mail from friends mainly so don't need to ask how they are.

Even if I am fine or not I would just say I'm good thank you how are you. No need to be rude and it breaks the ice a bit

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By *LUK OP Couple
over a year ago

Loughborough

"Well how do we start a conversation with anyone on here then ?"

A little more than a one-liner?

If someone emails with "Hi, How are you? x" and their profile is another one-liner about wanting to have fun, how are you supposed to form an opinion if it's something you want to pursue?

When we initiate contact we introduce ourselves and write a little bit about us so the people we email can form some sort of opinion as to how compatible we'd be.

If you're going to send a generic one-liner you might as well just wink.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Friend of mine received a three letter message yesterday......"grr". That was it. WTF was she meant to do with that?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I avoid this by simply being too repulsive to message.

It's going well so far, I must say.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Friend of mine received a three letter message yesterday......"grr". That was it. WTF was she meant to do with that?"

its better than the 'x' I got

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By *hoenixandflamesCouple
over a year ago

Stockport

A couple of times a day...

If I am in a rush, it's delete and block.

If I have a moment I just say "Fine".

Or I say "Once more, with feeling"

Or I just give them a quick profile critique if there is time...

Granted, I can appreciate the single guy frustration, but I spent two years on here as a single guy with 1 "result".

But I *always* made an effort. Every single time.

It doesn't take much to read a profile and send a decent message.

But seemingly that little is too much for too many.

Flames

(Just having deleted and blocked two people who have just messaged "Are you free tonight?" and "Hi x" from a straight guy).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just wondering what % of the emails you receive solely consist of the thread title (or variations thereof)?

We've even put in our profile " Also to save you asking "How are you both?" We are just dandy." yet I would say at least 60% of the messages we receive are still "Hi, how are you?"

How do you normally start conversations in real life?

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By *LUK OP Couple
over a year ago

Loughborough

How do you normally start conversations in real life?"

With a "Hi" but this isn't real-life, it's an email. An email that will hopefully lead to something, as I said above when we initiate contact we write a little bit about ourselves.

Anyways I didn't start this thread to have a whinge about it; was just curious to see how often everyone else gets the one liner "Hi" email as it makes up over half the emails we get.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Probably about half of my messages are like this but do contain more than just those words.

It's when I get 'Oi, u there?'that I become most disinterested in the people.

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By *oward1978Man
over a year ago

Rotherham

I hardly ever get messaged but on the very rare occasion I get a message like that it's always from a bloke. Normally followed a couple of messages later with him telling me it's a shame I'm straight and how he would love to suck me dry and rim my arse

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

messages ??? in box ??? erm what are they

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"How do you normally start conversations in real life?"

It depends on the people, the location, the activity etc. but I never say Hi how are you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well how do we start a conversation with anyone on here then ?"

Something like.....

Hi had a look at your profile and it looks like we might be after the same things? Compliment them on something specific on their profile and say have a look at me and id love to hear from you if you like the look of me, if not HAPPY FABBING

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By *piritsonfabCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham

I get loads. About 50%.

Even though my profile clearly states that any such messages will be deleted with no reply.

I used to answer them. The conversation would go:

Hi how are u?

Fine thank you.

So wat u up too?

Browsing fab.

What u into hun?

Check my profile it has a list.

Oh ok I will. Wanna meet up I can accomm?

As it says on profile we only meet in clubs.

Oh I don't do clubs, to shy.

OK. Have fun then.

So what on earth is the point in me responding to those messages.... it's a waste of everyone's time. Especially when you get dozens just like that.

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By *GHertsCouple
over a year ago

North Herts

"Well how do we start a conversation with anyone on here then ?

Something like.....

Totally agree ... probably more than half the messages we get are the 'hi how r u' variety or 'how's things' or 'what u doin''. The matching, blink and you'll miss them, profiles usually add nothing to your impression of that person so they go straight in the bin.

Ms G

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be fair.....all i really ever get from the ladies is hi or hey...they rarely get a reply!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What else are blokes supposed to put?its polite,i wish the roles were reversed and let the women come up with loads of different first messages and see how they cope

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By *ll 4 herCouple
over a year ago

Bury/Bolton

"Well how do we start a conversation with anyone on here then ?

A little more than a one-liner?

If someone emails with "Hi, How are you? x" and their profile is another one-liner about wanting to have fun, how are you supposed to form an opinion if it's something you want to pursue?

When we initiate contact we introduce ourselves and write a little bit about us so the people we email can form some sort of opinion as to how compatible we'd be.

If you're going to send a generic one-liner you might as well just wink.

this and also

"A couple of times a day...

If I am in a rush, it's delete and block.

If I have a moment I just say "Fine".

Or I say "Once more, with feeling"

Or I just give them a quick profile critique if there is time...

Granted, I can appreciate the single guy frustration, but I spent two years on here as a single guy with 1 "result".

But I *always* made an effort. Every single time.

It doesn't take much to read a profile and send a decent message.

But seemingly that little is too much for too many.

Flames

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By *elightfully Devilish xxxCouple
over a year ago

crazyland

"What should they put in a first mail?

"You are awesome and I want to fuck you."

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"What should they put in a first mail?"

Hi, I'm very wealthy, have no family or close friends and I'm terminally ill.

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"What else are blokes supposed to put?its polite,i wish the roles were reversed and let the women come up with loads of different first messages and see how they cope"

I manage when I contact first. I've never sent just "hi" or "x".

If I can't think of something to say to them then they've not intetested me enough to want to try anyway.

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

Most of my messages are 'Hi, how are you' or worse still 'wuut'

I just ignore them as they normally have no profile or pics to peruse......so therefore nothing to entice me to respond

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What else are blokes supposed to put?its polite,i wish the roles were reversed and let the women come up with loads of different first messages and see how they cope

I manage when I contact first. I've never sent just "hi" or "x".

If I can't think of something to say to them then they've not intetested me enough to want to try anyway."

And how many messages do you send in a day?no where near as many as guys

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

Yeah, give the guys a break - bottom line if a guy says hi and I like his profile, I'm going to reply!! The more dodgy and lacking your profile is, the more creative you're going to have to be with a first message.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yeah, give the guys a break - bottom line if a guy says hi and I like his profile, I'm going to reply!! The more dodgy and lacking your profile is, the more creative you're going to have to be with a first message."

Ahhh the voice of reason...thank you

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By *ath_Neil_bifunCouple
over a year ago

near cardiff

"Just wondering what % of the emails you receive solely consist of the thread title (or variations thereof)?

We've even put in our profile " Also to save you asking "How are you both?" We are just dandy." yet I would say at least 60% of the messages we receive are still "Hi, how are you?"

We have no problem with this as an introduction..i dont understand why people get so worked up by it if i'm being honest,and being the childish bellend that I am i would message hi,how are you on purpose if that was a big thing in someones profile..

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

[Removed by poster at 15/07/16 14:13:01]

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"What else are blokes supposed to put?its polite,i wish the roles were reversed and let the women come up with loads of different first messages and see how they cope

I manage when I contact first. I've never sent just "hi" or "x".

If I can't think of something to say to them then they've not intetested me enough to want to try anyway.

And how many messages do you send in a day?no where near as many as guys"

Not many usually, no, because there has to be something to interest me and most guys make very little effort with their photos and profiles. I'd message more if more appealed to me. At times I have blocked messages from men and done my own searching. It's usually worked out ok.

Maybe that's the problem? For some guys being female and on the same continent is enough for them to message and they spread themselves too thin.

Some guys need to realise women have to want to reply. The guy being interested is not enough.

As an example, I fairly often get messages saying they love my photos and profile. I look and they have no photos and almost no profile.

Why wouldn't they think that they need those in order to establish mutual interest if that's why they decided to message?

They think them being interested in meeting me should be enough.

I'm not going to spend ages chatting to loads of guys, fending off wank chat attempts, and trying to squeeze face pics out of them, in order to find out if there's even a basic initial interest.

If someone with a decent profile and appealing photos winks me or messages me with a "hi", I reply if I've not too much going on. I'll always prioritise the people who show they've read my profile though.

The problem is that most of the "hi"s come from people who've made no effort in any other area either.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well how do we start a conversation with anyone on here then ?

Something like.....

Soubds all very formulaic and basicaly a wordy "hi, lets talk"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well how do we start a conversation with anyone on here then ?

A little more than a one-liner?

If someone emails with "Hi, How are you? x" and their profile is another one-liner about wanting to have fun, how are you supposed to form an opinion if it's something you want to pursue?

When we initiate contact we introduce ourselves and write a little bit about us so the people we email can form some sort of opinion as to how compatible we'd be.

If you're going to send a generic one-liner you might as well just wink.

So you basicaly just rewrite a section of your profile?

They could have found all that with a "hi" and by clicking your profile.

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