FabSwingers.com forum: Is it ok not to want children?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

In view of Andrea Leadsom's remarks about Theresa May and making big assumptions about her not having children and the reasons why. Not everyone wants children and to be fair that's not a bad thing as its personal choice and sometimes it's out of our hands.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In view of Andrea Leadsom's remarks about Theresa May and making big assumptions about her not having children and the reasons why. Not everyone wants children and to be fair that's not a bad thing as its personal choice and sometimes it's out of our hands. "

well said! it's not illegal to not want them

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman
over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!

Yep!

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By *edRidingWolfCouple
over a year ago

Lydney

Of course it's ok!!!

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

Yes, it's ok. I never wanted children. I'd like to have given my parents grandchildren but that's not a good enough reason to have them.

Politics is a dirty business and there's a lot riding on the situation for both women, but tactics such as that are particularly scummy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ive never been the biggest fan of children

so no plans to have any up to this point

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

I never wanted them so therefore I didn't have them

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

Leadsom tried to make political capital out of a personal issue and it bit her on the arse. Leading questions or not, she walked into the trap and said something that would be more suited to mumsnet and not a potential leader of our country.

Deciding on whether to have children or not is a personal matter for each individual

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Yes it's ok and thankfully we have effective means to prevent pregnancy now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The world would probably be in a better place if more people had less children... personally I quite like kids right up until they can talk and move about lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes it's ok and thankfully we have effective means to prevent pregnancy now."

It's just a shame that some adults don't know how to use them!

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By *he girl with dreadlocksWoman
over a year ago

need to know basis in Wolverhampton

Why wouldn't anyone want

time sucking

Money sucking

Enery sucking

Emotional Sucking little cherubs about messing up the house and demanding everything like it's their God given right, Honestly You don't know what your missing out on lol

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By *ethnmelvCouple
over a year ago

Cardiff

It is totally fine, you just have to put up with people having them looking 'sad' for you! & of course they get extra paid holidays if they have been working - Maternity leave.

When people come out with the 'as a mum' line I feel like throttling them, it would be much more fun if they said 'as a twat'.

Rant over, but at least i don't get to be called a 'yummy mummy!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would love kids but not able to have any due to,a d*unk driver

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman
over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!

I so wished I didn't have the desire to have my own children life would have been far less heartbreaking financially and emotionally. I do have my beautiful girls now though,complete with all their little issues

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Many people just think you get married and then have kids and take it as normal.

There can be an amazing life without kids if you so wish

good marriage

fantastic career

Amazing holidays & travel

great home

head off at the snap of your fingers

and not bring I kid into this fucked up world we live in

ofcourse some would say that children are their life and I can understand that,

but some chose to live without and I can also understand that

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By *ockyjohnMan
over a year ago

North West

My wife and I have decided not to have children - so if anyone wants them, you can collect tonight at about 5pm

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

[Removed by poster at 11/07/16 09:48:40]

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"My wife and I have decided not to have children - so if anyone wants them, you can collect tonight at about 5pm

will you give them their tea first?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My wife and I have decided not to have children - so if anyone wants them, you can collect tonight at about 5pm

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

"My wife and I have decided not to have children - so if anyone wants them, you can collect tonight at about 5pm

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman
over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!

Many people just think you get married and then have kids and take it as normal.

There can be an amazing life without kids if you so wish

good marriage

fantastic career

Amazing holidays & travel

great home

head off at the snap of your fingers

and not bring I kid into this fucked up world we live in

ofcourse some would say that children are their life and I can understand that,

but some chose to live without and I can also understand that

ma"

You see I'm not sure it is a choice so to speak. Clearly it's not in everyone the need to have children,but when you can't reproduce you quickly realise it's not simply a choice of yeah I'm going to have kids it's a part of our make-up,the way the human race continues to survive. If it was simply a choice I would have given up after the first failed treatment,many times I thought the only way to stop feeling like this is if I wasn't here. If I had had the choice I would have stopped,my whole being told me differently...

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By *rs-Naughty_Mr-CuddlesCouple
over a year ago

Nr coleford

I Mr have not wanted children the exs in my live have all had grown up children same with current wife

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It is totally fine, you just have to put up with people having them looking 'sad' for you! & of course they get extra paid holidays if they have been working - Maternity leave.

When people come out with the 'as a mum' line I feel like throttling them, it would be much more fun if they said 'as a twat'.

Rant over, but at least i don't get to be called a 'yummy mummy!

Hahaha

And if some of the people that do have them stopped to think about it first there'd be a lot less unhappy children in the world.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't want a dog.

I think not wanting to bring up a child is fine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Of course it's ok! Not everyone wants children or can have children it's a very personal choice and one that shouldn't be questioned by other people outside of your relationship. Had a girl at work who until she fell pregnant never said a word about having children until she found out she was expecting and was continuely going on about how she doesn't understand why some of us didn't have children, I had to take her to one side to tell her that firstly it's my choice and secondly she was upsetting two women in the office as they'd dearly love to have children but it's not been possible. So suggested that she dropped the subject ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not wanting children is fine just as wanting children is fine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't want children if anyone wants to take them off my hands. Both are house trained, free to a good home

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

Yes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Of course it is, and in fact studies consistently show that the happiest marriages are those which are childfree by choice.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have two and as single father... its hard,I would'nt trade the pleasure of raising them and enjoying their company for the world. That being said its a choice and no one should be judged for not wanting children, Its time consumimg and financially a massive undertaking.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Of course it's ok! Not everyone wants children or can have children it's a very personal choice and one that shouldn't be questioned by other people outside of your relationship. Had a girl at work who until she fell pregnant never said a word about having children until she found out she was expecting and was continuely going on about how she doesn't understand why some of us didn't have children, I had to take her to one side to tell her that firstly it's my choice and secondly she was upsetting two women in the office as they'd dearly love to have children but it's not been possible. So suggested that she dropped the subject ...

Yeah it's not a good idea to be evangelical about it whatever side of the having children fence you're on.

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By *etter the devil you knowWoman
over a year ago

Lyndhurst

Its ok not to want children, I had one didn't want anymore and can well understand why some people don't want to have any. Although I love my son which goes without saying, I wouldn't recommend to anyone to have kids.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like kids...

I'm gonna find me a woman eventually and knock her up and retire happy from this shit

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutely... Isn't life all about choices.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What did she actually say? Reports are unclear.

I thought Theresa May said she couldn't have children, not that she didn't want them.

If that is true, Andrea's alleged comments are unbelievably unkind.

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By *eryBigGirlWoman
over a year ago

East Yorkshire

Personal choice and its no one else's business. I hate the assumption that when you get married it's ok for everyone to ask when there will be a little one arriving

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I like kids...

I'm gonna find me a woman eventually and knock her up and retire happy from this shit

Sarcasm?

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"My wife and I have decided not to have children - so if anyone wants them, you can collect tonight at about 5pm

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

When people come out with the 'as a mum' line I feel like throttling them, it would be much more fun if they said 'as a twat'.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

I think the womans comments may come back and bite her on the arse.

Of course it is a choice and just because you don't have children it doesn't make a person any less of one

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By *etter the devil you knowWoman
over a year ago

Lyndhurst

"Of course it is, and in fact studies consistently show that the happiest marriages are those which are childfree by choice.

Its not hard to see why though because you have less stress, more time for each other, more freedom and more money.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Of course it is, and in fact studies consistently show that the happiest marriages are those which are childfree by choice.

Its not hard to see why though because you have less stress, more time for each other, more freedom and more money."

It's actually a no-brainer.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never wanted kids, so I found myself a man who also didn't want them. The worst thing I could have done was have children knowing I didn't want them.

Women feel enough pressure regarding children. There are those who don't want them and those who can't have them. No one should have to explain themselves. People should mind their own business and let others mind theirs. Politics is so dirty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Children can be extremely rewarding.

It is life choice for any individual i dont see it as negative. It was what works for you at the end of the day.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are people out there who have kids and treat them so bad , couple who live near me have been reported for child abuise ,the police were called the other day the father was so abuisve to the children and they are only toddlers ,some people do not devise to have children ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always wanted three children till I had two then I only wanted one

Nah of course it's ok not to want kids, my eldest daughter don't want any to the point she went to get sterilised but due to her age and not having kids already they won't do her unless she goes private

My middle daugher can't have kids due to having a hysterectomy when she was 18 and pines daily for them

Funny how things pan out

I think not having kids is better than bringing unwanted kids into the world

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By *elvet RopeMan
over a year ago

by the big field

On the whole, children are vile, gobby, obnoxious little shits........guess what choice I made

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"On the whole, children are vile, gobby, obnoxious little shits........guess what choice I made

Mine aren't.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Like everything on life, it is the choice of the individual and each individual should be respected for their choices, whether we agree with them or not.

Nothing against the woman but she needs to think before talking. Some people would love children but can not by natural means through no fault of their own. Her comments could be hurtful to them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't really want them and I think it makes it more difficult to find a partner with the same opinion.

Leadsom is bat shit crazy and and shouldn't even be in the running. This country is already going backwards - we don't really need the likes of her dragging us back another 30 years.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"On the whole, children are vile, gobby, obnoxious little shits........guess what choice I made

I find adults to be more like this than children

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By *etter the devil you knowWoman
over a year ago

Lyndhurst

"On the whole, children are vile, gobby, obnoxious little shits........guess what choice I made

most of them are these days.

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

i didnt plan on a big family i have 4 the universe had other ideas. they are amazing..most other peoples children are not, mainly due to the parents in my experience.

im glad i had them they have enriched me as a person...and continue to do so but i had no strong maternal feelings about having children.

of course if you dont want them thats cool..i wish those people who cant have them, could...i feel for them. i also have a strong urge to foster now in my midlife but i decided i wouldnt do that until my youngest was teenager herself..its highly likely that i will foster or adopt at a point in the future..i like the sense of holding space for tribe . i am sterilized now, so i cant have any more, for which i am grateful x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"On the whole, children are vile, gobby, obnoxious little shits........guess what choice I made

most of them are these days."

I don't think they are at all. And those that are - that's often down to bad parenting so the fault of adults.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyone want to have mine ?

If you're free to choose to have kids or not, then that's your choice, sadly for some that choice is not available.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No interest in having kids what so ever!

I enjoy being able to do whatever I want far too much

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

"Anyone want to have mine ?

If you're free to choose to have kids or not, then that's your choice, sadly for some that choice is not available. "

dont want to have your babies ..no but i sure as hell want those stripey boxers..so want some stripey boxers like that...mmmmm xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Anyone want to have mine ?

If you're free to choose to have kids or not, then that's your choice, sadly for some that choice is not available.

dont want to have your babies ..no but i sure as hell want those stripey boxers..so want some stripey boxers like that...mmmmm xx"

I'll put them in the post

Will wash them first

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes it's ok and thankfully we have effective means to prevent pregnancy now.

It's just a shame that some adults don't know how to use them!"

I was just thinking the same thing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes it's ok and thankfully we have effective means to prevent pregnancy now.

It's just a shame that some adults don't know how to use them!

I was just thinking the same thing"

Nothing's 100% (fool) proof

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are you sure she wants them washed?!

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

"Anyone want to have mine ?

If you're free to choose to have kids or not, then that's your choice, sadly for some that choice is not available.

dont want to have your babies ..no but i sure as hell want those stripey boxers..so want some stripey boxers like that...mmmmm xx

I'll put them in the post

Will wash them first

"
just tell me where you get them from..do guys like women wearing their boxers? xx

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

"Yes it's ok and thankfully we have effective means to prevent pregnancy now.

It's just a shame that some adults don't know how to use them!

I was just thinking the same thing

Nothing's 100% (fool) proof

"
pill and a condom three tomes...now you know why im sterilized.. the universe is a joker

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

what was said exactly?

i never wanted kids, saw my mum and dad struggle to bring us up and didn't want the same for myself. have got 4 kids now and although it's not been as bad as i thought and i've pretty much enjoyed a lot of it, i am so very much aware of how much they have taken from me in terms of my life.

i don't think anyone should be forced to breed or be made to feel guilty for not wanting to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 11/07/16 14:16:32]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"pill and a condom three tomes..."

Ok, I'm never having sex again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes it is ok and I don't want them either, cos I got no time for them, the gym is more important

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By *etter the devil you knowWoman
over a year ago

Lyndhurst

"Yes it is ok and I don't want them either, cos I got no time for them, the gym is more important

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"On the whole, children are vile, gobby, obnoxious little shits........guess what choice I made

hahaha grumpy comment!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've never wanted kids tbh

but if I did then a medical mistake made the choice for me, so I couldn't have any!

But it doesn't matter because I still have 10 nieces and 4 nephews to keep me occupied so I still have my time my money and my freedom when I so wish and I wouldn't change a thing xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes it's ok and thankfully we have effective means to prevent pregnancy now.

It's just a shame that some adults don't know how to use them!

I was just thinking the same thing"
I thought the same and we will see most of them on jeremy kyle.

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

"pill and a condom three tomes...

Ok, I'm never having sex again.

"
the psychological relief of being sterilized was huge..and i had tubes removed not tied, for good measure..no splits no spillage..just babies..i call that fing spooky shit

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

Well said,i have never wanted kids ,but people think its ok to comment and aak whats wrong with me etc.Its not compulsory and we are as good a workers aa anyone.Miss.

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By *etter the devil you knowWoman
over a year ago

Lyndhurst

From what I hear Andrea Leadsom was misquoted which does happen a lot and they may have assumed that's what she meant as that is the way a lot of people think about women who have had children.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My 2 daughter's can't have kids, one of my sons is infertile from chemo,other son's not interested in baby's. I,m sad for them. But it doesn't worry me at all that I won't get grandchildren, and I thought I was a bit odd for that.

XXX

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By *elvet RopeMan
over a year ago

by the big field

"On the whole, children are vile, gobby, obnoxious little shits........guess what choice I made

I find adults to be more like this than children

On the whole, I don't like a lot of adults either. I a real people person ain't I? ??

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By *ELLONS AND CREAMWoman
over a year ago

stourbridge area

Its ok ... not everyone is maternal ....

Babies are hardwork .... they dont come with any instructions ,teenagers are even harder ....

But im so glad I have mine now . They are both grown up and left home ...

My son gets married this week. ..

And I carnt wait to see my little grandson in his suit ...

They cost a fortune when they are small .... and even more when they grow up ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's up to the individual, let's face it if we all produced children think of the population!!

G x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Of course it's ok not to want children. The world would be a much happier place if only the people who wanted children actually had them. If someone doesn't want children then fine. Society shouldn't pass comment.

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