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What makes someone a "good shag?"

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By *ee Viante OP   Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

I've been discussing this with a friend and although we've each shagged people we consider particularly good, we're having trouble working out why; what it was that made them good.

Over to you. What makes a person a good shag? (To you, personally. Obviously one person's great will be mediocre to someone else).

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

Getting onto the same wavelength and understanding what makes your partner tick

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By *radleywigginsMan
over a year ago

northwest

Confidence.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everyone knows my second best shag ever. 1st is my ex and father of my child who I was with almost 10 years, that's a different type of good shag cos thats massive trust, love, respect and knowing each other's bodies inside out.

2nd best guy was a shock for someone new. Met in London first time after months of flirting on a certain fitness forum. Knew he fancied me so much that there was absolutely nothing I could do that would put him off, he was also very skilled with his fingers like honestly never been fingered like that before, oral, fucking, everything was perfect, knew when to thrust, knew when to put just the tip in and throb it and then fuck with just the tip, cum in me all weekend and wouldn't let me shower for 3 days till I went home cos he was all about scents and smells, followed me to the toilet to finger me whilst having a piss and pissing over his hands. It was just the knowing that there was absolutely nothing I could do that would put him off, made me have no inhibitions or worries and was just all about sex!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Getting onto the same wavelength and understanding what makes your partner tick"

This. If we don't click then it's rubbish for me. It's both of us that makes it a good- or bad- shag.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not being worried about doing the wrong thing. Everything flows easily,no awkwardness,not too much talking. Moving positions together with barely a word,perfect erotic kisses.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Having a connection and boundrys so u can take it to the age

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Everyone knows my second best shag ever. 1st is my ex and father of my child who I was with almost 10 years, that's a different type of good shag cos thats massive trust, love, respect and knowing each other's bodies inside out.

2nd best guy was a shock for someone new. Met in London first time after months of flirting on a certain fitness forum. Knew he fancied me so much that there was absolutely nothing I could do that would put him off, he was also very skilled with his fingers like honestly never been fingered like that before, oral, fucking, everything was perfect, knew when to thrust, knew when to put just the tip in and throb it and then fuck with just the tip, cum in me all weekend and wouldn't let me shower for 3 days till I went home cos he was all about scents and smells, followed me to the toilet to finger me whilst having a piss and pissing over his hands. It was just the knowing that there was absolutely nothing I could do that would put him off, made me have no inhibitions or worries and was just all about sex! "

omfg, this!! X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Confidence and feeling comfortable and relaxed with the other person.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A meeting of minds

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By *randMrs Spanish BrunetteCouple
over a year ago

home sweet home


"Getting onto the same wavelength and understanding what makes your partner tick"

This

That only happens after lots of sex encounters with same person.

I've never had that connection first time at had sex with someone.

MrsSB

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have sex with me and find out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just doing anything that comes to your mind without thinking.... Just both of us letting ourselves go and our bodies following...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Getting onto the same wavelength and understanding what makes your partner tick

This

That only happens after lots of sex encounters with same person.

I've never had that connection first time at had sex with someone.

MrsSB "

I have. It's earth shattering!

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Not Brightonsteve according to Diamondsmiles

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ


"Have sex with me and find out "

Cheers Marc, I will do. When are you free

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Getting onto the same wavelength and understanding what makes your partner tick"

Definitely this.... unless it's lust at first sight, and sparks fly and whoosh

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By *etter the devil you knowWoman
over a year ago

Lyndhurst

All different things make it good.

I wouldn't meet someone again just because I enjoyed the sex though.

Idealy for me it would be with someone who I found reasonably attractive, felt comfortable with who like the same things as me.

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

Anticipation, execution

Oh and mega fun!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Getting onto the same wavelength and understanding what makes your partner tick

This

That only happens after lots of sex encounters with same person.

I've never had that connection first time at had sex with someone.

MrsSB "

This is true 95% of the time......but there is that time or two where an instant chemistry exists....brilliant when you do find it. Glad to say I have a few times!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's a tough one!

Well, in my opinion, it's all about the vibe, attraction and receptiness... without forgetting the kiss. From there I think that everything that comes after will be definitely good.

Mechanical sex is such a turn off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Have sex with me and find out

Cheers Marc, I will do. When are you free "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Getting onto the same wavelength and understanding what makes your partner tick

This

That only happens after lots of sex encounters with same person.

I've never had that connection first time at had sex with someone.

MrsSB

I have. It's earth shattering! "

I still remember the look on his face.

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By *hor ThumbMan
over a year ago

bristol

Its been said a few times on here and this is also true for us. Confidence not arrogance. A good sense of humour and respect. These things are a must for the build up of antisi.....pation! Then if theyre perseptive of whats happening when it gets physical, moving together, building the feelings together, reading each other. That for us makes a good shag! Oh, and filthy talk :D

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Getting onto the same wavelength and understanding what makes your partner tick

This

That only happens after lots of sex encounters with same person.

I've never had that connection first time at had sex with someone.

MrsSB

This is true 95% of the time......but there is that time or two where an instant chemistry exists....brilliant when you do find it. Glad to say I have a few times! "

Yes....i agree with both of these!....with hubby sex is definitely completely different to any other sex. It doesn't come close. And that's to do with the love and emotions involved and that special connection we have....but I've also experience amazing sex with others...it's like an instant almost animal attraction....you feel compelled to just fuck their arse off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you have to fit together well - not just physically

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Compatabity

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By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

For me it's meeting someone who doesn't have to be told what you want or how you want it, they just know how to kiss me and touch me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Chemistry and a mutual interest in certain sexual things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Usually if they turn up Im pretty happy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The ones that make me shout eureka x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For me, a combination of anticipation, chemistry and compatibility.

That mental build up and stimulation often leads to my most mind blowing encounters

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Getting onto the same wavelength and understanding what makes your partner tick"

This and follows that complete trust....had a good few on here too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Everyone knows my second best shag ever. 1st is my ex and father of my child who I was with almost 10 years, that's a different type of good shag cos thats massive trust, love, respect and knowing each other's bodies inside out.

2nd best guy was a shock for someone new. Met in London first time after months of flirting on a certain fitness forum. Knew he fancied me so much that there was absolutely nothing I could do that would put him off, he was also very skilled with his fingers like honestly never been fingered like that before, oral, fucking, everything was perfect, knew when to thrust, knew when to put just the tip in and throb it and then fuck with just the tip, cum in me all weekend and wouldn't let me shower for 3 days till I went home cos he was all about scents and smells, followed me to the toilet to finger me whilst having a piss and pissing over his hands. It was just the knowing that there was absolutely nothing I could do that would put him off, made me have no inhibitions or worries and was just all about sex! "

You gorgeous dirty girl.....

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

From my perspective it is what I would call 'feel' - the same thing that makes a good horseman or a good contact dancer. An acute awareness of a partners state and responses, the ability to adapt to them, and an intuitive grasp of what is required at any given moment.

Either that, or someone who just does all the shit I like!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Chemistry & connection.

Some bodies just fit almost instinctively well together

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The kiss.

That is the thing that tells me if the sex is going to be good or not.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"The kiss.

That is the thing that tells me if the sex is going to be good or not."

Best kisser I've met in years was a shit shag!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The kiss.

That is the thing that tells me if the sex is going to be good or not.

Best kisser I've met in years was a shit shag! "

Sorry, I was tired

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The kiss.

That is the thing that tells me if the sex is going to be good or not.

Best kisser I've met in years was a shit shag!

Sorry, I was tired "

Haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Passion...if there's no passion it's bloody boring!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The kiss.

That is the thing that tells me if the sex is going to be good or not.

Best kisser I've met in years was a shit shag!

Sorry, I was tired

Haha "

You can laugh but snoring whilst I give you a blowjob was extremely rude and unforgivable.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree with many above, for me it's about being on the same wavelength, about reading each other and reacting to what the other wants. The best meet I've ever had had all of this plus having that unquantifiable connection

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"I agree with many above, for me it's about being on the same wavelength, about reading each other and reacting to what the other wants. The best meet I've ever had had all of this plus having that unquantifiable connection"

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By *ee Viante OP   Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"The kiss.

That is the thing that tells me if the sex is going to be good or not.

Best kisser I've met in years was a shit shag! "

Ahhhh iiinteresting.

What made it shit?

Maybe I should have asked the question the other way around. What makes someone a shit shag?

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By *ultry SuccubusTV/TS
over a year ago

London

When the person fulfil my desire at that particular time (fulfil each other's desires).

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By *rtemisiaWoman
over a year ago

Norwich


"Just doing anything that comes to your mind without thinking.... Just both of us letting ourselves go and our bodies following... "

This

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

It varies and I'm partly responsible for what makes someone a good shag with me.

Certainly the connection needs to be good. Someone who'll move at my pace and sense it. Someone who really turns me on and makes me feel very satisfied. If the feelings are very intense, that's a big part. But my part of the deal is probably that I need to be doing the same or more for them.

There'll be tenderness and gentleness but also hard and strongly intense play - it's a workout, so fitness is key. Preferably able to endure and repeat. Someone who's perhaps not that, or at all, limited - their mind more deviant than mine, perhaps.

And someone who's also calm, so still and restful together is OK.

A lot of this is boundary reaching or pushing. High levels of pleasure and connection on many levels. My wild meets their wild.

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By *ee Viante OP   Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


" I'm partly responsible for what makes someone a good shag with me."

Agreed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" I'm partly responsible for what makes someone a good shag with me.

Agreed."

Spot on

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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago

Filthy Fuckeryville

Passion, staying power, consideration and THAT glint in their eye....

That look which says 'YOU are mine right now and the world can just fuck off til I've had you'!

It does sometimes happen on a first meet (trust me!) but it's rare

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dunno ? Change outta a tenner ?

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

Meet me and find out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Meet me and find out "

Told you to stop begging DJ it's not sexy!

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By *ee Viante OP   Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


" I'm partly responsible for what makes someone a good shag with me.

Agreed.

Spot on "

I was thinking about a friend I had a threesome with. I was talking to him about the third person involved and saying how nice they are and he added "a good shag too", (he's right!).

I've also made similar comments about others.

So although I recognise that it's partly down to me, I'm trying to work out what it is that leads me to think that or say it about someone.

A lot of what's been said on this thread applies.

Being imaginative, confident and adventurous are things that contribute to someone being a good shag for me. Listening to any guidance from me and paying attention to my reactions, correctly reading them and using them to hone what they do also.

Good kissing is essential as is good communication and showing they're enjoying it. Guys who lock down their reactions and don't give much feedback (in terms of actions rather than verbal) are hard work and usually the sex isn't particularly satisfying.

Being able to repeat, and wanting to, because it's usually disappointing when they're done after cumming once.

Being willing to take the lead but also able to let me lead is ideal, (unless they're subbing, in which case not trying to take over and not being a pain in the arse are important).

Not being a one trick pony or thinking vigorous thrusting for ages is the height of good sex is important.

Enjoying the journey rather than thinking orgasm is the most important thing and trying to get there as quickly as possible.

Having a sense of humour. Sex is messy, and can be undignified and ridiculous. Being relaxed about it and able to laugh about it is vital.

I once had a boyfriend who accidentally farted in my face during a bj. No huge deal, I laughed and carried on and promptly forgot about it.

He was mortified. I told him it wasn't a big deal but he mentioned it regularly for years, reminding me eachh time because it wasn't something I thought about at all. Eventually he fixed the memory in my head.

I still don't care a jot about it but there was no need for him to keep berating himself for it. Him laughing with me and forgetting about it would have been better. Knowing he felt uncomfortable about the experience made it less good for me too.

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By *ee Viante OP   Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"Passion, staying power, consideration and THAT glint in their eye....

That look which says 'YOU are mine right now and the world can just fuck off til I've had you'!

It does sometimes happen on a first meet (trust me!) but it's rare "

Ooh that glint. Yes, that's really hot. That look when you just know you're about to be thoroughly fucked. It's partly the confidence thing, "I'm taking you now".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Everyone knows my second best shag ever. 1st is my ex and father of my child who I was with almost 10 years, that's a different type of good shag cos thats massive trust, love, respect and knowing each other's bodies inside out.

2nd best guy was a shock for someone new. Met in London first time after months of flirting on a certain fitness forum. Knew he fancied me so much that there was absolutely nothing I could do that would put him off, he was also very skilled with his fingers like honestly never been fingered like that before, oral, fucking, everything was perfect, knew when to thrust, knew when to put just the tip in and throb it and then fuck with just the tip, cum in me all weekend and wouldn't let me shower for 3 days till I went home cos he was all about scents and smells, followed me to the toilet to finger me whilst having a piss and pissing over his hands. It was just the knowing that there was absolutely nothing I could do that would put him off, made me have no inhibitions or worries and was just all about sex! "

Omg!! This!

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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago

Filthy Fuckeryville


"Passion, staying power, consideration and THAT glint in their eye....

That look which says 'YOU are mine right now and the world can just fuck off til I've had you'!

It does sometimes happen on a first meet (trust me!) but it's rare

Ooh that glint. Yes, that's really hot. That look when you just know you're about to be thoroughly fucked. It's partly the confidence thing, "I'm taking you now"."

That's the one . I had a 'glinty' meet last week that was most delicious

Problem is I keep seeing the same glint in some of his pics and I want MOOOORE!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If they can get into my mind and engage it, they're part way there.

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By *hor ThumbMan
over a year ago

bristol


"Usually if they turn up Im pretty happy "

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By *hor ThumbMan
over a year ago

bristol


"From my perspective it is what I would call 'feel' - the same thing that makes a good horseman or a good contact dancer. An acute awareness of a partners state and responses, the ability to adapt to them, and an intuitive grasp of what is required at any given moment.

Either that, or someone who just does all the shit I like!! "

agreed

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"The kiss.

That is the thing that tells me if the sex is going to be good or not.

Best kisser I've met in years was a shit shag!

Ahhhh iiinteresting.

What made it shit?

Maybe I should have asked the question the other way around. What makes someone a shit shag?"

He had a bit of a mental hurdle to overcome due to an op - I got him over that hurdle but then he only lasted five mins!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The kiss.

That is the thing that tells me if the sex is going to be good or not.

Best kisser I've met in years was a shit shag!

Ahhhh iiinteresting.

What made it shit?

Maybe I should have asked the question the other way around. What makes someone a shit shag?

He had a bit of a mental hurdle to overcome due to an op - I got him over that hurdle but then he only lasted five mins! "

He lasted all of 5 mins!! High five

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"The kiss.

That is the thing that tells me if the sex is going to be good or not.

Best kisser I've met in years was a shit shag!

Ahhhh iiinteresting.

What made it shit?

Maybe I should have asked the question the other way around. What makes someone a shit shag?

He had a bit of a mental hurdle to overcome due to an op - I got him over that hurdle but then he only lasted five mins!

He lasted all of 5 mins!! High five"

Mind you the hours of passionate snogging and boob worship in the moonlight that led up to it made it all worthwhile!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Best sex ever was with someone who was my best friend at the time. He knew about sexual insecurities and he gave me the space and time to become confident enough to overcome those insecurities. He taught me a lot about my body, how to squirt, how to have an internal orgasm during intercourse, he was my first proper threesome and we pushed each other's boundaries - added to that, he's the only man and second person EVER to make me cum by licking my clit and using his fingers on my g spot at the same time. His was the first male body I've ever fully explored and relish.

The problem is, the only time we were on the same level and communicating well was when we were making love, and you can't spend your whole lives just shagging like rabbits.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Everyone knows my second best shag ever. 1st is my ex and father of my child who I was with almost 10 years, that's a different type of good shag cos thats massive trust, love, respect and knowing each other's bodies inside out.

2nd best guy was a shock for someone new. Met in London first time after months of flirting on a certain fitness forum. Knew he fancied me so much that there was absolutely nothing I could do that would put him off, he was also very skilled with his fingers like honestly never been fingered like that before, oral, fucking, everything was perfect, knew when to thrust, knew when to put just the tip in and throb it and then fuck with just the tip, cum in me all weekend and wouldn't let me shower for 3 days till I went home cos he was all about scents and smells, followed me to the toilet to finger me whilst having a piss and pissing over his hands. It was just the knowing that there was absolutely nothing I could do that would put him off, made me have no inhibitions or worries and was just all about sex! "

The second actually sounds really hot

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am interested to read all this. Surely most of the things mentioned don't happen in clubs...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For me its about connection and that first kiss, if you kiss well together its gonna be awsome

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By *hor ThumbMan
over a year ago

bristol


"The kiss.

That is the thing that tells me if the sex is going to be good or not.

Best kisser I've met in years was a shit shag!

Ahhhh iiinteresting.

What made it shit?

Maybe I should have asked the question the other way around. What makes someone a shit shag?

He had a bit of a mental hurdle to overcome due to an op - I got him over that hurdle but then he only lasted five mins! "

patience is a virtue!

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