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"Good question...it maybe more difficult for a guy to change lifestyle etc..I think most of the women would happily take the red sails into the sunset route with the right guy but he would probably have to be something special in bed ! " I think the same as you dude. Thank you | |||
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"As a single person, if you had been swinging for a good few years and had experienced most things, 121, MMF, FFM and group/orgy fun... and loved it. You then meet someone and fall in love.. that person is a NON swinger and not likely to become one.. If after all that multiple sex, could you become exclusive to one person and be happy to have sex with that person for the rest of your life.. Disclaimer... this is not pointed at anyone in any way shape or form.. I am just curious. I REPEAT, a hypothetical question " No, I don't think so. I used to think that I could meet someone and fall in love and live happily ever after and wave goodbye to the swinging side of my life, chapter over sort of thing. I don't think that any more though. The thought of having sex with just one person for the rest of my days scares the living daylights out of me. However, at the same time, I'd never say never cause how do I know that I won't meet someone who'll sweep me off my feet and I'll be happy with just them. Unlikely, of course, but not impossible. *picks splinters out of arse* | |||
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"love is a very very strong emotion,much stronger than anything physical" thank you. | |||
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"Friend of mine announced last year that he had met, the one, and he was the first to admit that he was going to find it difficult to be with just one person. 12 months on he is really struggling with the relationship. He's about to be working away for 6 months and has told me he already got some meets lined up. " Thats what I would imagine MAY happen... thank you xx | |||
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"well for me no, i couldn't but then i feel the whole monogamy thing is not our natural state anyway and research backs that up ...great question btw." thank you | |||
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"As a single person, if you had been swinging for a good few years and had experienced most things, 121, MMF, FFM and group/orgy fun... and loved it. You then meet someone and fall in love.. that person is a NON swinger and not likely to become one.. If after all that multiple sex, could you become exclusive to one person and be happy to have sex with that person for the rest of your life.. Disclaimer... this is not pointed at anyone in any way shape or form.. I am just curious. I REPEAT, a hypothetical question No, I don't think so. I used to think that I could meet someone and fall in love and live happily ever after and wave goodbye to the swinging side of my life, chapter over sort of thing. I don't think that any more though. The thought of having sex with just one person for the rest of my days scares the living daylights out of me. However, at the same time, I'd never say never cause how do I know that I won't meet someone who'll sweep me off my feet and I'll be happy with just them. Unlikely, of course, but not impossible. *picks splinters out of arse*" need a hand with the splinters? | |||
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"As a single person, if you had been swinging for a good few years and had experienced most things, 121, MMF, FFM and group/orgy fun... and loved it. You then meet someone and fall in love.. that person is a NON swinger and not likely to become one.. If after all that multiple sex, could you become exclusive to one person and be happy to have sex with that person for the rest of your life.. Disclaimer... this is not pointed at anyone in any way shape or form.. I am just curious. I REPEAT, a hypothetical question " The question isn't really for us, but, what I can say is....if either of us wanted to stop swinging then I am sure we would be still happy with each other. | |||
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"As a single person, if you had been swinging for a good few years and had experienced most things, 121, MMF, FFM and group/orgy fun... and loved it. You then meet someone and fall in love.. that person is a NON swinger and not likely to become one.. If after all that multiple sex, could you become exclusive to one person and be happy to have sex with that person for the rest of your life.. Disclaimer... this is not pointed at anyone in any way shape or form.. I am just curious. I REPEAT, a hypothetical question The question isn't really for us, but, what I can say is....if either of us wanted to stop swinging then I am sure we would be still happy with each other." Defo Rugby.. I would imagine a great many couples would be the very same. thanks x | |||
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"if the swinging is more important than partner then maybe that person ISNT the right one for you . " agree.. and it isnt't ME. lol... no buggar would be daft enuf to take me on | |||
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"I think initially yes, long term probably not xx" Me too x | |||
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" The thought of having sex with just one person for the rest of my days scares the living daylights out of me. " Can't really answer from a single pov, as have been with OH for 25 years (since O levels ) However, the thought of having sex only with him for however long we'r around doesn't bother me. Sure, I enjoy fun with other people, but at the end of the day sex with him is more meaningful and he knows what buttons to press and I am far less inhibited with him than anyone else. Sure, sometimes it's not earth-shattering, but I've had crap sex with a meet (only the 'excitement' of it being with someone different has made it less crap) - at least with him we're more likely to laugh about it - neither of us is going to get all hung up on it. If I was starting out now from a single going to a couple as in the original question, I have no idea. I'd like to think so, but I also (realistically?) think that men would find it harder than women to maintain - the initial intentions may be there, but temptation may be too great (especially if working away) | |||
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" The thought of having sex with just one person for the rest of my days scares the living daylights out of me. Can't really answer from a single pov, as have been with OH for 25 years (since O levels ) However, the thought of having sex only with him for however long we'r around doesn't bother me. Sure, I enjoy fun with other people, but at the end of the day sex with him is more meaningful and he knows what buttons to press and I am far less inhibited with him than anyone else. Sure, sometimes it's not earth-shattering, but I've had crap sex with a meet (only the 'excitement' of it being with someone different has made it less crap) - at least with him we're more likely to laugh about it - neither of us is going to get all hung up on it. If I was starting out now from a single going to a couple as in the original question, I have no idea. I'd like to think so, but I also (realistically?) think that men would find it harder than women to maintain - the initial intentions may be there, but temptation may be too great (especially if working away)" thanks... I also think guys would struggle more. x | |||
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"I ask myself this question a lot the time I was totaly monogamous in my marriage for 32 years ...I never even kissed another guy !!! but having enjoyed this lifestyle for 5 years im pretty certain if i do find the guy i want to share the rest of my life with he will just have to want to share me,so i cant really see myself having a red sails in the sunset moment to be quite honest !! " You enjoy x | |||
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"Yes of course I could, swinging is a different emotion than love, if I fell in love again and she didn't swing then neither would I " Good man Kev, thank you. | |||
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" One thing I wouldnt do though is break contact with close friends in this circle, that would be something he would have to accept." Great point xx thanks | |||
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" One thing I wouldnt do though is break contact with close friends in this circle, that would be something he would have to accept. Great point xx thanks" can I have a gold star please? :0 | |||
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" The question isn't really for us, but, what I can say is....if either of us wanted to stop swinging then I am sure we would be still happy with each other." Agree, exactly what I would have posted, but thought as couples our situation would be diferent. | |||
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" One thing I wouldnt do though is break contact with close friends in this circle, that would be something he would have to accept. Great point xx thanks can I have a gold star please? :0" of course you may x push your boobies out.. I will attempt not to prick you xx note ATTEMPT x | |||
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"i think so yes, a very good friend of mines has been in this lifestyle for many a year and whenever he meets a lady who dosnt swing then he deletes his profile instantly. as the guy said,,,love and swinging are very diffrent and if you are lucky enuf to find love there shldnt be a question really? but if like we are and are married,,,2 birds 1 stone woohoo lol auds xx" thanks Auds xx | |||
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"Maybe if I fell madly in Love as I would never cheat or go behind his back but it would creep back and be niggling in the back of my mind. Swinging is a lifestyle choice and it suits me for now but not sure how I will feel in two or three years I might think differently." thank you x | |||
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"i think so yes, a very good friend of mines has been in this lifestyle for many a year and whenever he meets a lady who dosnt swing then he deletes his profile instantly. as the guy said,,,love and swinging are very diffrent and if you are lucky enuf to find love there shldnt be a question really? but if like we are and are married,,,2 birds 1 stone woohoo lol auds xx" so hes still swinging then ??? "whenever he meets a lady who doesnt swing he deletes his profile " how many times has he done that when hes met "the One" ???? | |||
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" The question isn't really for us, but, what I can say is....if either of us wanted to stop swinging then I am sure we would be still happy with each other. Agree, exactly what I would have posted, but thought as couples our situation would be diferent. " I agree for couples swinging is in addition to an existing sex life.. thank you | |||
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"The decision to swing between lovers in a long time relationship has to be a two-way street. If I had (hypothetically) any qualms about giving up a lifestyle with a struggle then I'd have to reconsider monogamy with that person as temptation at opportune momentsis difficult for those with polygomous tendencies I imagine." Thanks | |||
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"if the swinging is more important than partner then maybe that person ISNT the right one for you . agree.. and it isnt't ME. lol... no buggar would be daft enuf to take me on" heheh !! i know it wasnt you hunni . i was just talking in general .xxx | |||
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"Both long-term relationships in my life I was completely faithful. For me, swinging has meant I don't have to commit in that same way. Like some others I know swinging has allowed me to withdraw love, preserve the thought of past loves and not have to give it again, to have great sex with no guilt. It also avoids my children seeing me with 'lots' of different 'uncles' therefore protecting them. I know in my heart if I were to meet someone for a relationship unless they too were a swinger, I'd stop and be monogamous again. " Will you marry me Laine? | |||
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"Both long-term relationships in my life I was completely faithful. For me, swinging has meant I don't have to commit in that same way. Like some others I know swinging has allowed me to withdraw love, preserve the thought of past loves and not have to give it again, to have great sex with no guilt. It also avoids my children seeing me with 'lots' of different 'uncles' therefore protecting them. I know in my heart if I were to meet someone for a relationship unless they too were a swinger, I'd stop and be monogamous again. " Aaaah, beautifully put: my sentiments too. | |||
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"I know in my heart if I were to meet someone for a relationship unless they too were a swinger, I'd stop and be monogamous again. " I know you would too. Your point about your kids is a very valid one. Ta x | |||
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"if the swinging is more important than partner then maybe that person ISNT the right one for you . agree.. and it isnt't ME. lol... no buggar would be daft enuf to take me on heheh !! i know it wasnt you hunni . i was just talking in general .xxx" Phew!! Temp lol x ta x | |||
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"As a single person, if you had been swinging for a good few years and had experienced most things, 121, MMF, FFM and group/orgy fun... and loved it. You then meet someone and fall in love.. that person is a NON swinger and not likely to become one.. If after all that multiple sex, could you become exclusive to one person and be happy to have sex with that person for the rest of your life.. Disclaimer... this is not pointed at anyone in any way shape or form.. I am just curious. I REPEAT, a hypothetical question " I could but only if they fucked me a lot. | |||
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"As a single person, if you had been swinging for a good few years and had experienced most things, 121, MMF, FFM and group/orgy fun... and loved it. You then meet someone and fall in love.. that person is a NON swinger and not likely to become one.. If after all that multiple sex, could you become exclusive to one person and be happy to have sex with that person for the rest of your life.. Disclaimer... this is not pointed at anyone in any way shape or form.. I am just curious. I REPEAT, a hypothetical question I could but only if they fucked me a lot." Fab | |||
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"As a single person, if you had been swinging for a good few years and had experienced most things, 121, MMF, FFM and group/orgy fun... and loved it. You then meet someone and fall in love.. that person is a NON swinger and not likely to become one.. If after all that multiple sex, could you become exclusive to one person and be happy to have sex with that person for the rest of your life.. Disclaimer... this is not pointed at anyone in any way shape or form.. I am just curious. I REPEAT, a hypothetical question I could but only if they fucked me a lot." Excellent!!!!! I'll take telling it how it REALLY is any day over mawkish sentimentality statements that make them look the perfect example of the type ofhuman being that simply doesn't exist | |||
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"I would definitely walk away from swinging if I fell in love. The reason I know this is because it would take a heck of a lot for me to fall in love and want to settle down. Also in past long term relationships I have not struggled to be faithful, when I have been in love I simply have not desired sex with other women. I don't completely understand why that is because outside of a serious relationship variety in the vanilla world and here is such a big driver for me. " Thanks Black. | |||
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"I've thought about this before, and I honestly, hand on heart, believe I could not walk away from swinging. Aside from the sex, I have met some fantastic people from various sites, and developed some great friendships. I'm very close to these people, more so then if friendships had developed elsewhere. And men in my past have seen this as threatening. Yes, I could chose to be faithful, but even to do that, would be denying my bi-sexual side exists. So in effect being someone I'm not. " Very valid point re your bi side Funky x | |||
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" Excellent!!!!! I'll take telling it how it REALLY is any day over mawkish sentimentality statements that make them look the perfect example of the type ofhuman being that simply doesn't exist " I see no examples of mawkishness in this thread, I see people genuinely answering a question asked by View..... your mocking attitude really could stop people answering in truth and avoiding such questions in future by giving humorous glib answers. I really don't see you have any deep knowledge of the other people in this thread on which to base your statement. | |||
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" Excellent!!!!! I'll take telling it how it REALLY is any day over mawkish sentimentality statements that make them look the perfect example of the type ofhuman being that simply doesn't exist I really don't see you have any deep knowledge of the other people in this thread on which to base your statement. " Did I say on this thread? I have a life outside of this forum you know. I like anything that appeals to me as truthful from anywhere and as that comment was made on the thread I expressed my liking for it. Then added what I dont like to hear from anyone. On or offline. I have no deep knowledge of anyone on this site. Neither do the majority of people who post. I am on my pc in my home looking at words on my screen I can respond to. Thats as deep as it goes for me. One thing is perfectly clear though. You have stated you see my style of posting as being mocking in your eyes. I see lots of styles and traits and face values on this site but I have the good grace to keep most negatives that serve no good purpose on an open forum to myself. I see lots of people making mocking statements and rolling eyes I dont think I am unique. I am now uncomfortable with you telling me off like I am some sort of a child for having an opinion about truth and mawkishness. If you have a tendency to get over involved and personal towards me who you know nothing about then I suggest you don't read anything I have to contribute. | |||
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"You read the question on this thread, others as you did, answered on this thread, you say yourself you only go on the words on the screen in front of you. Forgive me but I too was making comment on words and answers on the screen before me, not how you think. I feel nothing towards you personally so don't take it or imply it as such...I merely commented as I saw on an open thread. Then perhaps you should keep personal statments like 'Your mocking attitude' to yourself. Because in making a contribution it doesn not make me mocking. That makes me open for name calling it seems. Perhaps you should have asked me if I meant to come over as mocking. But then all things being equal you would have to write to everyone else asking them to explain themselves to you as you may have a wrong preconceived opinion. I am not changing my style to please you. If I go against the forum rules then I will take it from the powers that be. Not another member because they think they saw what I wrote as being mocking. I can see no site rules about having an attitude or we'd all be in trouble." As I said don't take it personally. I only go on what is written in front of me and how I see it. Apologies to all for disrupting the thread, and to you for any misconceptions. | |||
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"I wouldn’t get to the stage of falling in love with someone who couldn’t accept the things I have enjoyed, the person I am and my beliefs about sex. " I never considered that.. thanks Polo x | |||
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"You read the question on this thread, others as you did, answered on this thread, you say yourself you only go on the words on the screen in front of you. Forgive me but I too was making comment on words and answers on the screen before me, not how you think. I feel nothing towards you personally so don't take it or imply it as such...I merely commented as I saw on an open thread. Then perhaps you should keep personal statments like 'Your mocking attitude' to yourself. Because in making a contribution it doesn not make me mocking. That makes me open for name calling it seems. Perhaps you should have asked me if I meant to come over as mocking. But then all things being equal you would have to write to everyone else asking them to explain themselves to you as you may have a wrong preconceived opinion. I am not changing my style to please you. If I go against the forum rules then I will take it from the powers that be. Not another member because they think they saw what I wrote as being mocking. I can see no site rules about having an attitude or we'd all be in trouble. As I said don't take it personally. I only go on what is written in front of me and how I see it. Apologies to all for disrupting the thread, and to you for any misconceptions. " Apologies from me too for the disruption, forum. Thank you for your apology Laine, its accepted in the good grace you made it with no hard feelings. | |||
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"I had removed my open post to you, Laine to write in PM instead, but you had managed to quote it in your next post, before the delete came into effect." Sorry, I cannot remove it now, perhaps admin may remove it please? | |||
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"Yes, no problem at all." thank you | |||
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"As a single person, if you had been swinging for a good few years and had experienced most things, 121, MMF, FFM and group/orgy fun... and loved it. You then meet someone and fall in love.. that person is a NON swinger and not likely to become one.. If after all that multiple sex, could you become exclusive to one person and be happy to have sex with that person for the rest of your life.. Disclaimer... this is not pointed at anyone in any way shape or form.. I am just curious. I REPEAT, a hypothetical question " TBH I do not think I could ever go back to a vanilla life style. Now the life style is not a huge part of my life but nonetheless one that provides fun,m entertainment and chill factor besides some form of exercise, but then it would have to include any partner of mine. | |||
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" I don't do the relationship thing because I am selfish and like my life the way it is. If I did fall in love though, they would have to accept me for me and that part of my life is swinging. So no, I would not give it up." SNAP.......... | |||
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"My first reaction was no. My second reaction is yes. My third reaction is temporarily. So we are back to one... No View.... Unless it was you " bless ya xxx yu make an oldish man very happy x | |||
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"My first reaction was no. My second reaction is yes. My third reaction is temporarily. So we are back to one... No View.... Unless it was you " get yer coat View !! | |||
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"My first reaction was no. My second reaction is yes. My third reaction is temporarily. So we are back to one... No View.... Unless it was you get yer coat View !! " my coat is always on a hanger by the door... fail to prepare prepare to fail......... | |||
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"My first reaction was no. My second reaction is yes. My third reaction is temporarily. So we are back to one... No View.... Unless it was you get yer coat View !! my coat is always on a hanger by the door... fail to prepare prepare to fail......... " you probably need a nice warm coat more than most ?????? | |||
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"No been sunny for the last few days here..... really nice. I am excited for a lovely summer and many beach walks..." here too and me too ....enjoy ! | |||
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"No been sunny for the last few days here..... really nice. I am excited for a lovely summer and many beach walks... here too and me too ....enjoy !" thank you very much and you xx | |||
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"If im being really honest _iew, i wouldnt want to give up the life. Although i may 'think about' giving up for the right person. But im sure i would miss it, and in times of crap in the 'hypothetical relationship' i bet id hanker after it!! If i only played with single males, it would be easier to quit. But the bi side, the parties, the clubs!!! It would be quitting so much. So if i am mad enough to try a relationship again, it had better be with a swinger!!! x" Thank you Minx xxx fully get the bi side need xx | |||
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"Funny that because this is a question I have been pondering on for a long time. At 51 I didn't plan on being alone in life and would so love to have a "special person" to share the days events with a cuddle here and there and a good session in bed. However since becoming a swinger and thoroughly enjoying the sharing lifestyle, (love threesomes) I doubt I could give it up. I know at some point it will give me up when my crumpled and wrinkly body lets me down but until then I will savour every sharing minute I have. How fantastic would it be to meet up with a woman who enjoys this lifestyle and would want to spend her life with me but have the freedom to enjoy anything she wanted as well. A guy can dream eh lol " Just hold onto that dream ...... | |||
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"Funny that because this is a question I have been pondering on for a long time. At 51 I didn't plan on being alone in life and would so love to have a "special person" to share the days events with a cuddle here and there and a good session in bed. However since becoming a swinger and thoroughly enjoying the sharing lifestyle, (love threesomes) I doubt I could give it up. I know at some point it will give me up when my crumpled and wrinkly body lets me down but until then I will savour every sharing minute I have. How fantastic would it be to meet up with a woman who enjoys this lifestyle and would want to spend her life with me but have the freedom to enjoy anything she wanted as well. A guy can dream eh lol " That made me smile and reminded my of an evening around at a friends house. She and her husband were bantering over something or other. She was harsh with him at one point and he said in a bit of a panic "But you won't ever leave me would you?" She replied "If I was going to leave you it would have been when I still had a figure and young looks!" They will grow old together as most devored couples do, enjoying their sex live and cuddles and each others presence. But I wonder how we would cope when we can no longer attract anyone to swing with. I wonder if alone or perhaps lonely in our twighlight years our swinging memories will be enough and we think perhaps we should have gone for a soulmate rather than a series of swinging partners. Ah that crystal ball concept is a good un!! | |||
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