FabSwingers.com forum: Part 2

By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

There was never a part 1 to this thread but as there are a lot of part 2 threads already on the board I thought that they deserve their own tribute!

Feel free to post any banal , witty, profound or downright daft comments , whether they are in connection with another thread or not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have decided that for the rest of the day I don't want to be a grown up, so if you need me I will be in my pillow fort

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By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

"I have decided that for the rest of the day I don't want to be a grown up, so if you need me I will be in my pillow fort

Can I throw cushion bombs at your fort?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oooh a pillow fort. Nearly as good as a den made of two dining room chairs and a blanket, cooooooool. Can I play?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have decided that for the rest of the day I don't want to be a grown up, so if you need me I will be in my pillow fort

Lovely pillows they are too.

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

I fancy a snooze on the sofa, and then a cup of tea.

It's that kind of day...x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When normal dogs see a police dog do they think "fuck it's the police"

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By *educedWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

I went to the job centre and there was a fight. It was, for a few seconds, very fraught.

I'm home and I'm safe.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have decided that for the rest of the day I don't want to be a grown up, so if you need me I will be in my pillow fort

Can I throw cushion bombs at your fort?

If it's a cushion war you are after prepare to lose!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oooh a pillow fort. Nearly as good as a den made of two dining room chairs and a blanket, cooooooool. Can I play? "

Of course you can play, plenty of room in my fort

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By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

1. Just ate a frozen apple. It's Hardcore.

2. Bought a litre of Tipp-Ex yesterday. Huge mistake.

3. I've started a business building yachts in my attic. Sails are going through the roof.

4. I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.

5. I tried to catch some fog today but I mist.

6. I bought a dog from my local blacksmith. When I got it home it made a bolt for the door.

7. Last night I went to a comedy and philosophy convention. Laughed more than I thought.

8. Just watched a wildlife documentary on beavers. Best dam programme I've seen in a long time.

9. Jokes about German sausage are the Wurst.

10. I was trying to explain puns to my kleptomaniac friend today, but she kept taking things literally.

11. I stole a rabbit today. Then I had to make a run for it.

12. A woman told me she recognised me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore

13. Just got a job playing triangle in a reggae band. I stand at the back and ting.

14. What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back four seconds.

15. My wife told me I was a fool to build a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta.

16. Just watched a documentary on how ships are kept together. Riveting.

17. I used to have a problem where I couldn’t stop naming classic American sitcoms, but I’m over it now. Happy Days.

18. My wife's working in a bowling alley.

Ten pin?

No, permanent.

19. Police just caught a man stealing 50 helium balloons. They had to let him go.

20. How do you approach an angry Welsh cheese? Caerphilly.

21. Jokes about opticians just get cornea and cornea.

22. A steak pun is a rare medium well done.

23. I was walking the dogs the other day when all of a sudden they vanished into thin air. Not sure where they went, but I've got some leads.

24. Did you know that owls can't breed in the rain? It's too wet to woo.

25. When my wife told me I had to stop impersonating a flamingo, I decided to put my foot down

26. Dad: I’ve just been diagnosed with Tom Jones syndrome.

Mum: Is it common?

Dad: It's Not Unusual

27. My wife asked me if I could please stop singing 'Wonderwall'. I said maybe.

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