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Fuck ups

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Another time when it didn't all go right for me was this night when I was really feeling the horn... I'd gone out to a public sex environment and I ended up gettin the nod n all that from this geezer in a truck. It was one of those massive trucks with a really high cabin. I stepped on the foot panel and the whole of the front wheel was taller than me, this thing was huge. Anyway I climbed into the cabin and this blokish burly hairy trucker is sat waitin in the cabin bed. Anyway I'm cracking on with it and soon realise that this blokes got the works on, knickers and tights n that. Well fair play like but it ain't my thing really but by this stage I would have give power pelvis to Anne widecombe's sandpapery snatch so I sorta rolled with it. I must be honest though because at one stage I felt a bit like, well a lot like like Bernard Bresslaw, y'know that big daft clumsily fucker in the carry on films? well that was me as my fat fingers gingerly poked under the knicker line of this yorkie fella. Anyways the whole thing didn't last very long and once I'd coughed my custard I got fixin to fuck off. Anyway I said Tarra an all that and opened the door but I forgot that I was in a cabin and fell like a wingless chick and landed on the floor with a proper umph. Have you seen that meme on Facebook of that fat person on the floor where all their body fat looks melted on the floor like the absorbatron off Dr Who. Well in any case I winded myself and twisted my ankle. I didn't know whether to crap or cry.

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman
over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!

Thankyou,that's the first laugh I've had today

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Laughed so hard, I wee'd myself!!

Years ago, once was making eyes at a bloke in a nightclub.

Walked across the floor giving him the eye, didn't see a pillar, bashed into it and knocked a tooth out.

So no stranger to fuck ups.

xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You poor sod but sorry for laughing.That just sounds like getting hit in the balls by a ball during a game,and you are crying tears of pain and everyone around you are in tears of laughter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ha ha ha !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well,,every day is a school day.I've learnt two new phrases ; 'power pelvis' and 'coughing the custard'.

Education and amusement all in one go,,thank you.I hope you weren't hurt in your fall.

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By *eccymanMan
over a year ago

Gateshead

That made me chuckle. Thanks.

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By *oluptuousWetOneWoman
over a year ago

Wokingham / Reading

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By *layer oneMan
over a year ago

mirfield

Haha so funny but hope you ok

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Coughin the custard

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