FabSwingers.com forum: Fear of flying

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Has anyone ever managed to conquer this?

I have the most terrible phobia. I cant even watch a plane in the air. Or watch them on TV

Last time we booked to go away (17 yrs ago) I got to the airport and just couldnt get on the plane. So hubby had to take the kids away and I had to come home. Then a few years later, we tried again. This time I got on the plane, but after 10 mins had to be taken off as I was in such a state, they thought I was having a heart-attack. I know I am so pathetic and irrational.

But....after several glasses of wine and too muc sun, with friends at the weekend, we have decided it would be a great idea to have our first ever kid free holiday together, next year.

So, how the HELL am I going to get around this?

When people tell me theyve booked a hol and are all giddy, all I can think of is they have willing signed their own death warrant by getting on a plane.

Can I be cured???

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Hypnotism?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hypnotism?"

Tried it.

Didnt work

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't know how to get you on the plane. But if you make it that far then this simple thing might help. The best people to keep an eye on are the crew. They have seen and done it all. If there is something wrong they will know it before you. And if they are happily walking about doing there tea n coffee thing then all is good and there is nothing to worry about... hope that helps x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Saw a programme on this. They started with folks sitting in a plane on the ground for longer and longer eventually working up to a short flight.

Took them about 3 months of longer and longer exposure.

Other option is to load up with drink and tranquillisers and then get on. You won't worry about anything then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Flightradar24.com - just look at the thousands of planes taking off and landing safely.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also I work on an airport and I see hundreds upon thousands of flights and people come and go and nothing really bad has happened to any of them..... I know that doesn't help with your fear but it is the truth

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"I know I am so pathetic and irrational."

For starters you're not those things. If you have a true phobia, which you do, then it's nothing about being pathetic or irrational.

Flying in a plane is unnatural so you're probably more rational than most

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Has anyone ever managed to conquer this?

I have the most terrible phobia. I cant even watch a plane in the air. Or watch them on TV

But....after several glasses of wine and too muc sun, with friends at the weekend, we have decided it would be a great idea to have our first ever kid free holiday together, next year.

So, how the HELL am I going to get around this?

When people tell me theyve booked a hol and are all giddy, all I can think of is they have willing signed their own death warrant by getting on a plane.

Can I be cured???

You're not pathetic or irrational. Irrational fears are fears which are illogical (something that can't happen) and since planes have been known to crash your fear is completely legitimate.

I am also scared of flying, just not as much as you. I would prefer to take a ferry if I can't drive to somewhere but the length of the journey would be too long in some cases.

All phobia's can be cured as far as I'm aware, the fear is only as strong as we make it though. Sorry I can't be much real help, but if I was you I would definitely keep looking for a way to fight through it.

Good luck!

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By *piritsonfabCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham

Lots of valium

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I know I am so pathetic and irrational.

For starters you're not those things. If you have a true phobia, which you do, then it's nothing about being pathetic or irrational.

Flying in a plane is unnatural so you're probably more rational than most

Agreed, you're neither of these things.... but the truth about flying is that the most dangerous part is the time between leaving your house and getting to the airport

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Irrational fears are still genuine fears, you feel every bit as much as anybody experiencing rational fear!.

A fear of flying is not something to be ashamed of, it's actually one the more rational fears as it's not something humans were evolved to do and still has lots of deaths associated with it.

I think taking a good flying course which is designed to alleviate some of the worse symptoms will help but the key is to remember you won't ever be "cured" of it, there'll just help you to get through the worst of it

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I know (When I am feeling rational) that its the safest transport etc.

More chance of being bitten by a shark or hit on the head with a flying cow.

I have tried a fear of flying course in the past. I didnt manage to complete it. I wouldnt go on the plane at the end.

Hubby is so excited at the thought of a kid free week abroad. But now in the cold and sober light of day. I think I have made the worst mistake of my life. And if we do get to the airport and I cant get on the plane....I will let everyone down.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's not the flying you fear, it's the crashing you need to worry about!

Sorry OP, not helpful at all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I know (When I am feeling rational) that its the safest transport etc.

More chance of being bitten by a shark or hit on the head with a flying cow.

I have tried a fear of flying course in the past. I didnt manage to complete it. I wouldnt go on the plane at the end.

"
.

Like I said, don't be ashamed I know people who can't climb ladders six feet, take lifts(elevators for you Courtney), escalators, pick up a spider.

The only difference being nearly all these are avoidable on a day to day basis whereas flying to go abroad is pretty hard to avoid.

You'll never be cured, all you can do is mitigate the effects as best you can but it will take alot of courage to do it, hence why an awful lot of people get plastered before they fly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why don't you go by ferry somewhere - to Europe? Or on a cruise? So you can enjoy it rather than stressing about the flight. Or a train even. Lots of ways other than flying to see places.

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By *om and JennieCouple
over a year ago

Chams or Socials

Diazepam works a treat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why don't you go by ferry somewhere - to Europe? Or on a cruise? So you can enjoy it rather than stressing about the flight. Or a train even. Lots of ways other than flying to see places. "
....

Seen as you've said it

On an environmental level... Boats and trains work out slightly better.

The train to the south of France can be had reasonably if you shop about but my favourite is the boat from Plymouth to Santander if I remember correctly, over nighter with great bars

... Although it can be on the rough side across the bay of biscay(personally I've got great sea legs) although most of the time I couldn't tell if I was sea sick or pissed

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By *enard ArgenteMan
over a year ago

London and France

If you gave a true phobia; ( which it sounds that you do); DO NOT get on a plane until you have had some phobia therapy;

Once you are on the plane; you can't get off; and may seriously freak out. I know someone who did; had to be forcibly restrained and sedated.

Don't try to deal with it with valium/ booze:

Look up therapy for phobia of flying; there are courses which constructively treat the phobia; buy it takes something like a minimum of 3 months .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you gave a true phobia; ( which it sounds that you do); DO NOT get on a plane until you have had some phobia therapy;

Once you are on the plane; you can't get off; and may seriously freak out. I know someone who did; had to be forcibly restrained and sedated.

Don't try to deal with it with valium/ booze:

Look up therapy for phobia of flying; there are courses which constructively treat the phobia; buy it takes something like a minimum of 3 months .

Read what the OP has posted above and you will see that they tried that already

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tried back peddling already and mentioning other options.

Met with rolled eyes and sighs and "We knew you would try to get out of it."

When people dont have this fear, they dont really understand anyone who does.

And like another poster has said...its not the flying Im worried about, its the crashing and dying. Like the plane where the pilot flew into a mountain, what went through those poor peoples minds in the few seconds before it happened, when they realised what was happening.

I have flown before this phobia kicked in. A few times. It was never something I enjoyed, but I managed with it. Just. Then we had kids and it just went wild and got totally out of hand.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why don't you go by ferry somewhere - to Europe? Or on a cruise? So you can enjoy it rather than stressing about the flight. Or a train even. Lots of ways other than flying to see places. ....

Seen as you've said it

On an environmental level... Boats and trains work out slightly better.

The train to the south of France can be had reasonably if you shop about but my favourite is the boat from Plymouth to Santander if I remember correctly, over nighter with great bars

... Although it can be on the rough side across the bay of biscay(personally I've got great sea legs) although most of the time I couldn't tell if I was sea sick or pissed

I just lie in a cabin on a long crossing. But I'd love to do more train journeys around Europe. I fancied the trans Siberian route too.

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By *enard ArgenteMan
over a year ago

London and France

Look up

anxietyuk dot org dot uk

And search fear of flying,

( can't post a link on here)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would imagine seats and other cabin equipment going through their head.

Sorry.... really not being helpful here, just trying to make it a joke for ya

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have you tried cbt

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Why don't you go by ferry somewhere - to Europe? Or on a cruise? So you can enjoy it rather than stressing about the flight. Or a train even. Lots of ways other than flying to see places. ....

Seen as you've said it

On an environmental level... Boats and trains work out slightly better.

The train to the south of France can be had reasonably if you shop about but my favourite is the boat from Plymouth to Santander if I remember correctly, over nighter with great bars

... Although it can be on the rough side across the bay of biscay(personally I've got great sea legs) although most of the time I couldn't tell if I was sea sick or pissed

I just lie in a cabin on a long crossing. But I'd love to do more train journeys around Europe. I fancied the trans Siberian route too. "

I would happily float around the world in a rowing boat.

Boats/trains dont bother me at all.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

OP, have you had any desensitisation therapy?

If you are stressing about it now the fear will only grow as you get closer to the date. The rolling eyes aren't helpful and if you need to back out do it now before you do it at the airport and risk a bigger upset than rolling eyes.

Book something in the UK or get on the Eurostar.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Have made appt to see GP next week to ask about options. CBT, drugs etc.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have made appt to see GP next week to ask about options. CBT, drugs etc.

That must be awful i feel for you

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

The first time I went in a plane I flew it. Was in the CCF at school and we had a field day at RAF Abingdon. It was only a 2 seater Chipmunk and I had control for about 10 mins. Was great fun, but I thought the wings were going to fall off when we were taking off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The first time I went in a plane I flew it. Was in the CCF at school and we had a field day at RAF Abingdon. It was only a 2 seater Chipmunk and I had control for about 10 mins. Was great fun, but I thought the wings were going to fall off when we were taking off

Great beard ace

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Car ferry to Santander in Spain, from there Spain and Portugal are waiting for you.

Or eurostar to Paris, there are overnight trains that will get you to the Med.

Flying is not the only route to the sun, though it is safer than making toast in reality, if it is so stressful you couldn't enjoy the holiday so an alternative is the best way forward.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Or cruise

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Car ferry to Santander in Spain, from there Spain and Portugal are waiting for you.

Or eurostar to Paris, there are overnight trains that will get you to the Med.

Flying is not the only route to the sun, though it is safer than making toast in reality, if it is so stressful you couldn't enjoy the holiday so an alternative is the best way forward."

This! It's not just getting there but getting back. Why waste your precious time together feeling anxious about the return?

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By *eccymanMan
over a year ago

Gateshead

I don't like flying either but in the old pre-interweb thingy days you had to go to Thomas Cook in January to book your hols and that meant six months building up to getting on the plane knowing full well that two weeks later you had to do it again to come home.

That's when I realised that it wasn't the fear of flying that bothered me, it was the fear of dying.

I no longer have that fear.

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Eurostar. And if your partner and co-travellers are rolling their eyes tell 'em to fuck off. Phobias are not fun!

I love flying, hate airports, but I understand why people would dislike flying.

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Great beard ace"

Cheers dude

Jim said he wanted to see it while it's turquoise

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have you tried the EasyJet fear of flying course? Apparently it's great, helped a family member out and she'd tried several other options both medically and techniques to reduce her anxieties.

It's a rational fear, in the sense there is a risk, but opening a book is probably more potentially harmful, whereas a spider (UK) couldn't harm you. All the best, but don't feel under pressure - Eurostar or boats, cruises etc are all another stress free way to holiday.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a fear of flying but not this bad and I love to travel.

I never used to be bothered have spent many a flight in the jump seat etc. until 5 years ago and we hit turbulence and my now ex hubby mocked me saying we were going to crash land since then I'm crap.

It got to the point two year ago going away with mum BA messed up our pre booked seats and seperated us by the time I got to security I was in meltdown. A very nice security guy at Heathrow saw me sat me in the bar and got a customer service guy from BA to come down and sort it.

I'm ok during the flight it's just take off and landing are my trigger points and long as I'm sat with someone I know I can deal with tears and be talked down.

Also many people flying I find really helpful I had a nice lady chatting to me on my way back from

New York asking about my fear etc and I didn't realise she was distracting me while we landed

He suggested to me I go on the course and most airlines offer it now.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Easy cure with the right hypnotherapist and motivation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You could always give sky diving a go.. you certainly won't be worried about flying anymore lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Holiday in the uk. Or take the ferry across the channel rent a boat and cruise the canals of France.

Don't fly you know the horrendous security checks and the time wasted at some cheesy airport. Also with modern jets how do you know the engines are working. With prop planes you can see them going round.

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

When I used to go skiing, if I had the option I would take the Eurostar, much more civilised and comfortable than flying.

An option for you is to take the Eurostar to Paris, then it's a six hour train journey to Barcelona, in a fast comfortable train, nothing like we have in this country.

This summer I will be coming back from Venice via the alpine express into Zurich and either Eurostar back from Paris or perhaps fly depending on the logistics.

Once you get across the channel, Europe is freely accessible by train

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By *reelove1969Couple
over a year ago

bristol

[Removed by poster at 07/06/16 06:04:27]

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