FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Cleaning spunk from Grandma's Curtains

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 19/05/16 18:11:31]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"[Removed by poster at 19/05/16 18:11:31]"

I'm glad you removed it yourself

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"[Removed by poster at 19/05/16 18:11:31]

I'm glad you removed it yourself "

I've seen much worse. Could have been chintz curtains.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"[Removed by poster at 19/05/16 18:11:31]"

I saw that

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Hey Peeps...

With what started off as a passion filled sex session round my partners grandmas house whilst the OAP was out buying cake cases, turned into a disaster.

Regretfully and what I can only claim as poor planning and ill timing my partners grandma pulled up on the driveway. Indeed feeling a sense of relief that my cannon had already exploded before noticing the old dear pulled up. I couldn't help but feel an immediate sense of panic, not to mention a surprise that there was no queue at asda...

So with what I can only refer to as not my smartest decision in life, I hastily lifted myself up from grannies couch with my dripping tap and wiped the old boy on her dark blue linen curtains.

Needless to say my partner was unawares of my hasty clean up job and gleefully looked back at me hyped with the rush and excitement of our steamy porking.

However a day has passed and to my horror the infamous jizz stain has reared its ugly head on grannies right curtain like a chalk mark on a black board.

How do I remove the guilty stain without Granny knowing? Any suggestions?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"[Removed by poster at 19/05/16 18:11:31]

I'm glad you removed it yourself "

Had some typos... Back on now. Winner!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Easy. Make her some sloppy porridge. "Accidentally" spill some near the guilty curtain on the premise of looking at garden birds, et voila!

Clean up duty

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bang another load on the left curtain and claim it's the pattern.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lick it off.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ah, the Blue Waffle poster. Amusing but bollocks.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lack rose 100Couple
over a year ago

consett

You can spill a drink over it and then rub it down with a little washing up liquid lol and never do it again lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Put blue paint on your cock and use it like a brush.

Sarah

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

[Removed by poster at 19/05/16 19:09:46]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

[Removed by poster at 19/05/16 19:10:07]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

Dammit.

I'll get it right in a mo'

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury


""[Spunk removed from grandma's curtains by poster at 19/05/16 18:11:31]""

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


""[Spunk removed from grandma's curtains by poster at 19/05/16 18:11:31]""

third time lucky !

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Semen Stain Removal from Curtains

Solution 1:

1. Create a paste from baking soda and water.

2. Apply paste to the spot on the curtain and scrub with a brush. Once the spot is loosened, use cold water and a towel to wipe it up.

3. Repeat steps 1-2 until stain is gone.

4. Vacuum.

5. Sprinkle baking soda over the spot and let sit for 1 hour. This will eliminate the odor and absorb the rest of the moisture from the curtain.

Solution 2:

1. Scrape off the hard stuff with a dull knife.

2. Blot the area with cold water and a paper towel. Since semen is a protein, avoid hot water, as it will set the stain.

3. Create a dishwasher detergent and cold water mix and blot.

4. Blot with cold water and paper towel.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thanks guys and gals

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Bang another load on the left curtain and claim it's the pattern. "

Im pissing myself thats the funniest thing ever

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Semen Stain Removal from Curtains

Solution 1:

1. Create a paste from baking soda and water.

2. Apply paste to the spot on the curtain and scrub with a brush. Once the spot is loosened, use cold water and a towel to wipe it up.

3. Repeat steps 1-2 until stain is gone.

4. Vacuum.

5. Sprinkle baking soda over the spot and let sit for 1 hour. This will eliminate the odor and absorb the rest of the moisture from the curtain.

Solution 2:

1. Scrape off the hard stuff with a dull knife.

2. Blot the area with cold water and a paper towel. Since semen is a protein, avoid hot water, as it will set the stain.

3. Create a dishwasher detergent and cold water mix and blot.

4. Blot with cold water and paper towel.

"

Courtesy of the domesticated god-ess

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple


"Put blue paint on your cock and use it like a brush.

Sarah "

Brilliant

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's spring offer to take them to the dry cleaners. xxx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Chew it off

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

The stain looks like the Canadian flag

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Clean with cold water or solvents only - protein solidifies in heat.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hilarious!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Semen Stain Removal from Curtains

Solution 1:

1. Create a paste from baking soda and water.

2. Apply paste to the spot on the curtain and scrub with a brush. Once the spot is loosened, use cold water and a towel to wipe it up.

3. Repeat steps 1-2 until stain is gone.

4. Vacuum.

5. Sprinkle baking soda over the spot and let sit for 1 hour. This will eliminate the odor and absorb the rest of the moisture from the curtain.

Solution 2:

1. Scrape off the hard stuff with a dull knife.

2. Blot the area with cold water and a paper towel. Since semen is a protein, avoid hot water, as it will set the stain.

3. Create a dishwasher detergent and cold water mix and blot.

4. Blot with cold water and paper towel.

Courtesy of the domesticated god-ess "

You should see me in my pinny

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just green arrows you - some of the funniest posts I've seen on this site

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Could be a lot worse....at least it's not her beef curtains!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 21/05/16 16:42:19]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Girlfriend has found the stain... Bollocks

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"[Removed by poster at 21/05/16 16:42:19]"

Yay it's been cleaned

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top