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What do you stick out the letter box when the Geehovas come knocking?

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By *ohnaron OP   Man
over a year ago

london

Your tongue?

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

I haven't had Geehovas. I just politely tell the proselytisers that I'm not interested. My tongue isn't that long and my letter box is fierce.

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By *erbyDalesCplCouple
over a year ago

Derbyshire

I invite them in and offer them tea.

They find it most unsettling, assume I must be a crazy axe murderer, and make their excuses.

Mr ddc

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By *asonnosaMMan
over a year ago

Grantham

a fab invitation ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get 2 copper tubes side by side and poke them through

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I opened the door to them... told them I always wanted to join the army and shoot people.. they've never been back

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By *asonnosaMMan
over a year ago

Grantham


"I opened the door to them... told them I always wanted to join the army and shoot people.. they've never been back "
xD

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By *uby0000Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire

i always say i dont want to appear rude by shutting the door in peoples faces then shut door

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We don't get them in rural Devon

Or perhaps like everyone else... they avoid me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never answer the door unless I'm expecting someone. There's been many a time I've been too scared to move in case they're still at the door and will hear me!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My cock

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By *thwalescplCouple
over a year ago

brecon

My mum made the mistake of inviting them in once, as it was chucking it down and she felt sorry for them (two, a guy and a lady)... they kept coming back.

She eventually asked me to come round and tell them she wasn't interested any more, as she had tried and they didn't seem to be listening.

They turned up, same day, same time every week, and I answered the door.

They told me they were there to see mum, as she had invited Jesus into her house... I mustered my best growly "Clint Eastwood" and said, well, Jesus is welcome, but you two can fuck off, and closed the door.

They didn't come back.

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By *asonnosaMMan
over a year ago

Grantham


"My mum made the mistake of inviting them in once, as it was chucking it down and she felt sorry for them (two, a guy and a lady)... they kept coming back.

She eventually asked me to come round and tell them she wasn't interested any more, as she had tried and they didn't seem to be listening.XD

They turned up, same day, same time every week, and I answered the door.

They told me they were there to see mum, as she had invited Jesus into her house... I mustered my best growly "Clint Eastwood" and said, well, Jesus is welcome, but you two can fuck off, and closed the door.

They didn't come back. "

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By *asonnosaMMan
over a year ago

Grantham


"My mum made the mistake of inviting them in once, as it was chucking it down and she felt sorry for them (two, a guy and a lady)... they kept coming back.

She eventually asked me to come round and tell them she wasn't interested any more, as she had tried and they didn't seem to be listening.XD

They turned up, same day, same time every week, and I answered the door.

They told me they were there to see mum, as she had invited Jesus into her house... I mustered my best growly "Clint Eastwood" and said, well, Jesus is welcome, but you two can fuck off, and closed the door.

They didn't come back. "

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By *ed LipstickWoman
over a year ago

Fucksville

I just tell them that I'm an atheist x

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By *ali 69Man
over a year ago

jersey

A copy of " The God Delusion . " So they can read another book instead of the one that has caused widows and orphans in Palestine , Belfast and countless other placess where grown ups believe that invisible men give them the right to kill real ones .

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By *ed LipstickWoman
over a year ago

Fucksville


"I just tell them that I'm an atheist x "

My mum when I was younger told them that we were a Satan worshipping clan and they never knocked again?

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

Or if you are my ex you invite them in to explain the flaws in their theology over a nice cup of tea.....

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By *iforfun999Man
over a year ago

Haverfordwest

What, no one owning up to having sex with the Jehova's (other religions are available)?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Christmas cake wrapped in a donor card!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A dildo wrapped in a palm leaf, they soon scatter.

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By *JB1954Man
over a year ago

Reading

if i know they are there, normally on a sunday , dressed in suits etc. i open door with bottle of spirits and glass in hand, offer them a drink, not seen them very often now lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just ask them to sign up to the blood donor register

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I just ask them to sign up to the blood donor register"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I just tell them that I'm an atheist x "

Haha so do i :D

Emma x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just let them talk then I give them a look and ask them to repeat what they just said as I give them a blank look they don't tend to continue and walk away

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

We live in a free country do we not people can believe in what ever they choose be it right or wrong. Part of being a jw is going out to witness as it's really called. they mean you no harm they are just doing what they believe to be right. All it takes is a polite no thank you and they should politely thank you for your time and walk away. If they don't simply ask them to direct you to an "elder" explain to him (sadly it will be a him) that this person will not except no for an answer and who ever it was who knocked on your door is firmly in the shit. It really is that simple no need to be nasty they are simply following there believes.

By the way no I'm not 1 I just have close family that is

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester


"We live in a free country do we not people can believe in what ever they choose be it right or wrong. Part of being a jw is going out to witness as it's really called. they mean you no harm they are just doing what they believe to be right. All it takes is a polite no thank you and they should politely thank you for your time and walk away. If they don't simply ask them to direct you to an "elder" explain to him (sadly it will be a him) that this person will not except no for an answer and who ever it was who knocked on your door is firmly in the shit. It really is that simple no need to be nasty they are simply following there believes.

By the way no I'm not 1 I just have close family that is "

It least they are not planting bombs or killing people in the name of there religion leave email be folks there's much worse out there

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By *otblondewife hornyMrCouple
over a year ago

Cambuslang


"What, no one owning up to having sex with the Jehova's (other religions are available)? "
my mate used to work with a couple of girls who were jehovas, out every Friday getting pissed up and knew their way around a cock, great fun they were.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd send out one of my two wing chicks. One would confuse them and wouldn't allow them to get a word in edgewise and would probably invite them to join Fab and the other would just scare the shit out of them. Useful combination those two, if a little crazy and unpredictable at times.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I just say "I'm not interested, thank you".

I wonder how many responding here with "witty" answers about how they get rid of them complain that people on here are rude for ignoring their advances...

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"I just say "I'm not interested, thank you".

I wonder how many responding here with "witty" answers about how they get rid of them complain that people on here are rude for ignoring their advances..."

Same. Although I did read a copy of 'watchtower' once which was astonished poorly written.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The last Jehovah to visits severed hand.....as the head won't fit....so I've impaled it on a post by the door as a friendly warning!

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"I just say "I'm not interested, thank you".

I wonder how many responding here with "witty" answers about how they get rid of them complain that people on here are rude for ignoring their advances...

Same. Although I did read a copy of 'watchtower' once which was astonished poorly written. "

It is isn't it !

I answered the door to Jehovah's witnesses @40 weeks pregnant, one asked "do you ever wonder how life got started?" I looked at my stomach, then at them and said "I think I know" laughing...not even a smile

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By *ny1localMan
over a year ago

READING

being open minded, if I have the time I usually invite them in+have a good debate on religions of the world...they tend to leave hrs later and dont come back.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I open the door but tell them i am.not interested before they start to even talk ...then shut the door and lock it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They don't knock our door .....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I just say "I'm not interested, thank you".

I wonder how many responding here with "witty" answers about how they get rid of them complain that people on here are rude for ignoring their advances...

Same. Although I did read a copy of 'watchtower' once which was astonished poorly written.

It is isn't it !

I answered the door to Jehovah's witnesses @40 weeks pregnant, one asked "do you ever wonder how life got started?" I looked at my stomach, then at them and said "I think I know" laughing...not even a smile "

Brilliant.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham


"I open the door but tell them i am.not interested before they start to even talk ...then shut the door and lock it "

Why lock it? Do you think they are going to just barge in?

It makes me sad that we seem to think it ok to be rude to people and mock their beliefs. To try and make them uncomfortable by offering them things that we know are against their beliefs (blood/organ donor cards to JW's, bacon to Muslims or Jews etc) yet get so offended when others do the same to us.

Ok it's maybe a tad annoying that they come to your door unsolicited but a simple no thank you is all it takes. What have they wasted? The thirty seconds it takes to open the door and be polite?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We live in a free country do we not people can believe in what ever they choose be it right or wrong. Part of being a jw is going out to witness as it's really called. they mean you no harm they are just doing what they believe to be right. All it takes is a polite no thank you and they should politely thank you for your time and walk away. If they don't simply ask them to direct you to an "elder" explain to him (sadly it will be a him) that this person will not except no for an answer and who ever it was who knocked on your door is firmly in the shit. It really is that simple no need to be nasty they are simply following there believes.

By the way no I'm not 1 I just have close family that is "

..I'm not a JW but one of my friends is. ..and some people are so disrespectful! !!!! ... they are just doing what they believe to be right so why do people feel the need to take the piss! !!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've simply no idea.....

The Footman attends door traffic in the morning whilst my Butler takes on that duty in the afternoon...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I answer the door politely and just say ,sorry I'm catholic and wish to stay that way

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By *erbyDalesCplCouple
over a year ago

Derbyshire


"

I wonder how many responding here with "witty" answers about how they get rid of them complain that people on here are rude for ignoring their advances..."

I gave a "witty" answer because I believe people come to the lounge for a bit of a giggle, and a break from their serious, often stressful lives. I appreciate the other forums are more serious, which is why, in the main, I try to avoid peppering them with my oft ill-judged humour.

I actually do invite them in, when I have time, sometimes they accept, sometimes they stay on the doorstep. We politely exchange our different interpretation of the bible, with me pushing examples of Jesus's laid back and forgiving attitude, while they concentrate on St. Paul's bigotry and divisiveness.

When I'm feeling wicked, I turn the discussion around to whether or not laying naked together with another man made King David gay. It seems the Fab rules of straight even extend back into the Old Testament.

If any Jehovah's Witness had complained about my post I would obviously apologise to them, but I'm afraid I never extend that concept to people who get offended on behalf of other people.

Mr ddc

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"

I wonder how many responding here with "witty" answers about how they get rid of them complain that people on here are rude for ignoring their advances...

I gave a "witty" answer because I believe people come to the lounge for a bit of a giggle, and a break from their serious, often stressful lives. I appreciate the other forums are more serious, which is why, in the main, I try to avoid peppering them with my oft ill-judged humour.

I actually do invite them in, when I have time, sometimes they accept, sometimes they stay on the doorstep. We politely exchange our different interpretation of the bible, with me pushing examples of Jesus's laid back and forgiving attitude, while they concentrate on St. Paul's bigotry and divisiveness.

When I'm feeling wicked, I turn the discussion around to whether or not laying naked together with another man made King David gay. It seems the Fab rules of straight even extend back into the Old Testament.

If any Jehovah's Witness had complained about my post I would obviously apologise to them, but I'm afraid I never extend that concept to people who get offended on behalf of other people.

Mr ddc"

Mr ddc, I'm not offended on behalf of other people I'm just pointing out anomalies in "some" attitudes and I don't believe that you have ever come into the forum complaining about rude people ignoring your advances. If anyone mistakenly believes that my post applies to them even if they don't fulfil the criteria I will happily apologise but I never extend that courtesy to those it does apply to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I just say "I'm not interested, thank you".

I wonder how many responding here with "witty" answers about how they get rid of them complain that people on here are rude for ignoring their advances..."

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By *erbyDalesCplCouple
over a year ago

Derbyshire


"

Mr ddc

Mr ddc, I'm not offended on behalf of other people I'm just pointing out anomalies in "some" attitudes and I don't believe that you have ever come into the forum complaining about rude people ignoring your advances. If anyone mistakenly believes that my post applies to them even if they don't fulfil the criteria I will happily apologise but I never extend that courtesy to those it does apply to. "

"courtesy": that's the word I was struggling for. I don't if it it's age or insufficient tea.

For the record, I also commend them on what they do, since they are the only Christian group I know that actually does as Jesus instructed and carry his message into the world. Most others sit in their churches/meeting halls and wait for the world to come to them. (Both Mrs ddc and myself also worked door-to-door when we were younger and desperate, so we understand what they must experience.)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Last time they called round my little boy answered the door with no pants on. They have never returned!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I open the door but tell them i am.not interested before they start to even talk ...then shut the door and lock it

Why lock it? Do you think they are going to just barge in?

It makes me sad that we seem to think it ok to be rude to people and mock their beliefs. To try and make them uncomfortable by offering them things that we know are against their beliefs (blood/organ donor cards to JW's, bacon to Muslims or Jews etc) yet get so offended when others do the same to us.

Ok it's maybe a tad annoying that they come to your door unsolicited but a simple no thank you is all it takes. What have they wasted? The thirty seconds it takes to open the door and be polite? "

Never had them to my door. About the same level of inconvenience as someone selling gas etc. It's just people promoting their beliefs or earning a living.

Having said that some areas are beset by door to door activities and it seems to happen in lumps. Can be unsettling for some folk.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My dog will try to stick her nose out the letterbox, that's about it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Mr ddc

Mr ddc, I'm not offended on behalf of other people I'm just pointing out anomalies in "some" attitudes and I don't believe that you have ever come into the forum complaining about rude people ignoring your advances. If anyone mistakenly believes that my post applies to them even if they don't fulfil the criteria I will happily apologise but I never extend that courtesy to those it does apply to.

"courtesy": that's the word I was struggling for. I don't if it it's age or insufficient tea.

For the record, I also commend them on what they do, since they are the only Christian group I know that actually does as Jesus instructed and carry his message into the world. Most others sit in their churches/meeting halls and wait for the world to come to them. (Both Mrs ddc and myself also worked door-to-door when we were younger and desperate, so we understand what they must experience.)

"

Blimey you want to live where I do, we get the Mormons & Methodists cold calling as well as JW's. I'm never rude but I do object to someone else's beliefs being preached on my doorstep especially to my kids.

Since seeing the Book Of Mormon though, I shall answer the door with. "Hello, my name is..." & break into song

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't invite random strangers to knock on my door , I don't appreciate the intrusion of cold calling, therefore I reserve the right to respond in a manner of my choosing when either occurrence imposes itself on the sanctity of my privacy ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Interesting how it's seems to be comedy gold to treat one region like crap and yet another cannot be poked fun of.

I recall a thread the other day where someone used the phrase 'Ali Snackbar' (or similar) and was vilified; but it's ok to tell JV's to 'fuck off' to their face as part of a funny anecdote.

This place. Minefield. Clown shoes.

Peace out, I'm off to spread the good word about the FSM.

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By *erbyDalesCplCouple
over a year ago

Derbyshire


"

Blimey you want to live where I do, we get the Mormons & Methodists cold calling as well as JW's. I'm never rude but I do object to someone else's beliefs being preached on my doorstep especially to my kids.

Since seeing the Book Of Mormon though, I shall answer the door with. "Hello, my name is..." & break into song "

I wouldn't know where to start with a Mormon, but you have to hand it to them, the Methodists do have the best hymns

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"Interesting how it's seems to be comedy gold to treat one region like crap and yet another cannot be poked fun of.

I recall a thread the other day where someone used the phrase 'Ali Snackbar' (or similar) and was vilified; but it's ok to tell JV's to 'fuck off' to their face as part of a funny anecdote.

This place. Minefield. Clown shoes.

Peace out, I'm off to spread the good word about the FSM."

He meant 'religion' not 'region'.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I just say "I'm not interested, thank you".

I wonder how many responding here with "witty" answers about how they get rid of them complain that people on here are rude for ignoring their advances..."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No matter what religion, if they knock my door, I amswer while wearing my pentacle necklace and listen to them. Then apologise and tell them I already have a faith, but I loved learning about theirs

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"

Mr ddc

Mr ddc, I'm not offended on behalf of other people I'm just pointing out anomalies in "some" attitudes and I don't believe that you have ever come into the forum complaining about rude people ignoring your advances. If anyone mistakenly believes that my post applies to them even if they don't fulfil the criteria I will happily apologise but I never extend that courtesy to those it does apply to.

"courtesy": that's the word I was struggling for. I don't if it it's age or insufficient tea.

For the record, I also commend them on what they do, since they are the only Christian group I know that actually does as Jesus instructed and carry his message into the world. Most others sit in their churches/meeting halls and wait for the world to come to them. (Both Mrs ddc and myself also worked door-to-door when we were younger and desperate, so we understand what they must experience.)

"

Yep. They're the only people who when they knocked on my friends recently widowed mother's door on seeing her distress helped her. They also helped an elderly woman my mum knows hang her curtains.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Mr ddc

Mr ddc, I'm not offended on behalf of other people I'm just pointing out anomalies in "some" attitudes and I don't believe that you have ever come into the forum complaining about rude people ignoring your advances. If anyone mistakenly believes that my post applies to them even if they don't fulfil the criteria I will happily apologise but I never extend that courtesy to those it does apply to.

"courtesy": that's the word I was struggling for. I don't if it it's age or insufficient tea.

For the record, I also commend them on what they do, since they are the only Christian group I know that actually does as Jesus instructed and carry his message into the world. Most others sit in their churches/meeting halls and wait for the world to come to them. (Both Mrs ddc and myself also worked door-to-door when we were younger and desperate, so we understand what they must experience.)

Yep. They're the only people who when they knocked on my friends recently widowed mother's door on seeing her distress helped her. They also helped an elderly woman my mum knows hang her curtains."

They can be lovely people tbh. I already have a religion so the ones on my street don't really come to me, but they sometimes come around for a cup of tea and some biscuits as our faith's agree on a few things

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By *errygTV/TS
over a year ago

denton

their harmless, i was at a mates house they knocked on said i dont live here, bob was in the bath shouted up , he said tell em to fvck off, so i said sorry hes in the bathroom he said can you call later

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By *reakShow90Man
over a year ago

Manchester/halifax

I tell them that they have woke me up an as I do night shifts and iam not very happy they said sorry and left

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"their harmless, i was at a mates house they knocked on said i dont live here, bob was in the bath shouted up , he said tell em to fvck off, so i said sorry hes in the bathroom he said can you call later"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Last time the JW's called, I invited them in, made them some tea and biscuits and asked them to tell me all about their religion.

They said "we have mo idea, we've never got this far before "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Your tongue?"
The dog works every time

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By *iforfun999Man
over a year ago

Haverfordwest

My letterbox is too difficult to open from the inside, so it's easier to open the from door and do it from the outside, too late if cold callers are knocking.

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh


"We live in a free country do we not people can believe in what ever they choose be it right or wrong. Part of being a jw is going out to witness as it's really called. they mean you no harm they are just doing what they believe to be right. All it takes is a polite no thank you and they should politely thank you for your time and walk away. If they don't simply ask them to direct you to an "elder" explain to him (sadly it will be a him) that this person will not except no for an answer and who ever it was who knocked on your door is firmly in the shit. It really is that simple no need to be nasty they are simply following there believes.

By the way no I'm not 1 I just have close family that is "

Whilst I totally hear what you're saying and manners really don't cost anything, I wholly object to them knocking on doors. By all means, leave the door to your place of worship open and welcome new people but this recruitment drive and standing on street corners with a pile of leaflets really does make me quite cross. Believe whatever you like but I don't need you knocking on my door to preach it to me.

It's only happened to me once, I laughed and explained very politely that I'm a sinner.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Last time I answered the door to them I had Cradle of Filth blasting on the stereo and was wearing a t-shirt that said "Gothic as Fuck" on it. Strangely they didnt hang around. - Mr x

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"Last time I answered the door to them I had Cradle of Filth blasting on the stereo and was wearing a t-shirt that said "Gothic as Fuck" on it. Strangely they didnt hang around. - Mr x"

I would have thought the less likely looking convert, the more they'd want to try and 'save' you.

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