FabSwingers.com forum: Becoming a parent later in life ?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What's people's views. Opinions and real life experiences with becoming a parent later in life ?........

Asking for a friend.

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

"What's people's views. Opinions and real life experiences with becoming a parent later in life ?........

Asking for a friend.

"
if youve never had any? or, if you are thinking of becoming a parent again?..my answers would be different x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Should have said. 1st time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My personal opinion is that i wouldn't want children later in life as i don't want to be that old when they are growing up. I don't want to immediately become a burden on them due to old age just as their life is getting started.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I had my first 2 children at 19 and 20 ...then my third at 30 and my last at 37 ...my little boy makes me feel young..I think it's brilliant being an older mum xx

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

"Should have said. 1st time. "
do it x

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By *epper123Woman
over a year ago

London

Depends what you mean by later in life .... I had mine when I had my youngest when I was 36 so foes that count?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had my eldest at 30 & my 2nd at 33. Part of me wishes I had them when I was younger.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Depends what you mean by later in life .... I had mine when I had my youngest when I was 36 so foes that count?"

Mid 40's

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I had my eldest at 30 & my 2nd at 33. Part of me wishes I had them when I was younger. "

I wouldn't count that as late in life. I assumed 40+

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

My friend had her first child and only child at 45. Shes the apple of her eye and shes a great mum.

But shes finding it hard to socialize all her "friends" kids have left home and they can do what they like and all the parents from the groups she goes to are about 20 years younger than her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had my daughter at 31 and personally I could not imagine having a child any later in life than that, cant keep up with her now.

Think it depends on the individual though x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My parents were in their 40's when I was born.

The kids in school parents were in their 20's.

I was embarrassed as they automatically thought my parents were my grandparents.

Also mum n dad were from completely different eras.

They didn't understand my homework from school so I couldn't ask them to help etc.

And I never had a young dad to play footie with etc or go for a pint with when I was 18 as it was like being out with my grandad etc. Not a cool look when your a young lad.

These are just a few things I can mention.

That's just my take on it from my personal experience.

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By *epper123Woman
over a year ago

London

"My parents were in their 40's when I was born.

The kids in school parents were in their 20's.

I was embarrassed as they automatically thought my parents were my grandparents.

Also mum n dad were from completely different eras.

They didn't understand my homework from school so I couldn't ask them to help etc.

And I never had a young dad to play footie with etc or go for a pint with when I was 18 as it was like being out with my grandad etc. Not a cool look when your a young lad.

These are just a few things I can mention.

That's just my take on it from my personal experience. "

That does sound sad, but most parents don't understand the homework these days, no matter what age they are ....

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Also you would be old as a grandparent. Jays eldest grandchild is only 7 where as my mum is younger than jay and on a great grandchild

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have 3 kids aged 23, 18 and 8.

Had the youngest at 37 and I have to say that we are both much more relaxed now than we ever were when we were younger parents. It could be down to experience I guess but being an older parent has its plus points. A friend of mine had her first child at 40 and is loving it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My friend had her first child and only child at 45. Shes the apple of her eye and shes a great mum.

But shes finding it hard to socialize all her "friends" kids have left home and they can do what they like and all the parents from the groups she goes to are about 20 years younger than her"

This.

Plus you can't guarantee your child will ever become independent. You may have a child with special needs in some form.

I have so many friends with special needs kids. Their worst fear is what happens to their child when they can't be there to look after them any more.

And Downs is more likely when you are in your 40's.

Then again fuck it. She won't know until she does it. It's an amazing, horrifying, wondrous, terrifying, hilarious sleep deprived experience.

She won't know what she's going to get until she does it. A baby who sleeps through the night from 4 weeks, constantly smiling and an A* student at school? Or triplets with ADHD or cerebral palsy.

You just don't know!

I think if we were truly privy to what being a parent would be like, in advance, none of us would ever do it.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Two children in my sons class mothers where the same age as my mum. There now having to look after the parents

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London

I would say, dont ever pass by the opportunity to bring a new life into the world, its a wonderful thing. I would have been a crazy parent in my twenties though, wouldn't have been ready emotionally at all ...

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Looking back if i could have chosen an age i think maybe about 34

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's pros and cons to having a baby at any age. I think having a baby into your 40's is very normal nowadays. There are more risks but she'd be monitored as a higher risk pregnancy and possibly under consultant care.

My great grandmother had 14 children from when she was 18 until the last one at age 45. I guess that's different but my Nan was the youngest and was very close to her Mum and Dad.

If she feels it's right for her then she should go for it.

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

I think if we were truly privy to what being a parent would be like, in advance, none of us would ever do it

this is why i said do it. if its something youve always wanted then thats the main thing, if youre young at heart, it helps.

they teach you a good deal...i wouldnt have anymore, so ive been sterilized but then ive got 4.. and maybe thats a good barometer..if you don't want to be, maybe you want one. however, in today's world of parental custody etc..if i was to want one..i wouldnt do the normal relationship thing..that wont go down well on here..but i think preconception agreements should be introduced..id go do it, on my terms..all the way..

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

Had my first at 22 and last at 31 and sterilised at the same time because I didn't want to be an older mum. As it was we felt ancient going to parents evening with the youngest as we were the oldest by far.

My youngest is 24, eldest 33, the grandchildren keep me young and I can hand them back.

Being an older mum wasn't for me. Good luck to all concerned who decide to be a parent later in life.

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London

[Removed by poster at 08/05/16 17:39:49]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well I had my first 2 children at 19 and 20 ...then my third at 30 and my last at 37 ...my little boy makes me feel young..I think it's brilliant being an older mum xx"

Jesus that must have been hard, both mine were newborn when they were born, and that looked like hard enough work as it was

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London

"I think if we were truly privy to what being a parent would be like, in advance, none of us would ever do it

Of course people would do it .... I think it's totally the other way around, if you knew the joys and other emotions it brings, you would do it in a heartbeat .... I have three children I have brought up on my own, and managed all of the custody stuff to the benefit of my children's well-being. It's an honour and a privilege to bring children into the world and to attempt to provide them with everything they need to become successful and well rounded adults

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As far as your child having to look after you in later life - can you put enough plans and finances in place so they don't have to?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hard work bring kids up.. Still as hard and my youngest is 19

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I loved being a younger mum and love being an older mum ..my son who is 8 is not embarrassed about me at all ..he loves me going to all his plays and stuff at school and proudly waves and tells his friends ..my mum is over there ..

I chat to all the younger parents and will say they don't believe I'm nearly 46 which is a lovely compliment...if you feel young at heart I think it makes you look better to xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it can be a selfish thing to do having a child late on in life.

You might be in a better place and may suit you better?

But what about the child?

Your going to be as old as the child's peers grandparents.

As much as you think your still going to be young trendy and hip you won't be. Only in your head you will be.

You won't have the physical energy as a younger parent to be able to share things with your child on a physical level as much.

What you learnt at school in studying will be by far obsolete to what it would be if you were a younger parent.

You will die when your children are still relatively young.

They may have to become your carers as you age.

And not to mention the possible complications during pregnancy in later life and the risks of having a baby with birth defects.

This is only my personal opinion and from my own experience as a child with elderly parents that's all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think it can be a selfish thing to do having a child late on in life.

You might be in a better place and may suit you better?

But what about the child?

Your going to be as old as the child's peers grandparents.

As much as you think your still going to be young trendy and hip you won't be. Only in your head you will be.

You won't have the physical energy as a younger parent to be able to share things with your child on a physical level as much.

What you learnt at school in studying will be by far obsolete to what it would be if you were a younger parent.

You will die when your children are still relatively young.

They may have to become your carers as you age.

And not to mention the possible complications during pregnancy in later life and the risks of having a baby with birth defects.

This is only my personal opinion and from my own experience as a child with elderly parents that's all.

I can do everything I did as a younger lady and it's my little boy that makes me feel like that

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By *etter the devil you knowWoman
over a year ago

Lyndhurst

"Looking back if i could have chosen an age i think maybe about 34"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The thing with such a personal thing as this is that the person that needs to make that decision is the best person to know what is right for their situation. We can only give our own personal reasons for thinking it's a good idea or not.

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By *llie RoseWoman
over a year ago

By the seaside

There are pros and cons to both younger and older parents. As long as a child knows it is wanted, loved and cherished the pros should outweigh the cons of either.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My friend was 44 and best thing thats ever happened to her.

Cant speak from experience i had mine at 20 and 25 and now sterilised xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had my 1st at 17.I'm due to have my youngest in 17days I've just turned 40.I'm more relaxed now I'm older lol.

Sam X

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

My mum was 43 when she had me I haven't had a child yet and I'm 36 the longer it goes on the more resigned I am that maybe I won't be so lucky to have a child and just getting on with life.

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By *ark074Man
over a year ago

nottingham

"There are pros and cons to both younger and older parents. As long as a child knows it is wanted, loved and cherished the pros should outweigh the cons of either. "

This

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At any age it's the biggest life change ever its better to do than regret not ever embracing what could potentially be the best thing ever to happen to her . No one can predict the future so I say go for it . Also with friends children being older built in baby sitters xxxxxxxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think it can be a selfish thing to do having a child late on in life.

You might be in a better place and may suit you better?

But what about the child?

Your going to be as old as the child's peers grandparents.

As much as you think your still going to be young trendy and hip you won't be. Only in your head you will be.

You won't have the physical energy as a younger parent to be able to share things with your child on a physical level as much.

What you learnt at school in studying will be by far obsolete to what it would be if you were a younger parent.

You will die when your children are still relatively young.

They may have to become your carers as you age.

And not to mention the possible complications during pregnancy in later life and the risks of having a baby with birth defects.

This is only my personal opinion and from my own experience as a child with elderly parents that's all.

You have some valid points and that was your experience. But - my parents had me young - by 21. I lost them both when I was fairly young - my Mum was an only child. We ended up being my Nan's carer.

Things happen and unfortunately you cannot foresee.

There are a lot more tests they can do to check for birth abnormalities in pregnancy. Not everyone will agree with it but if using IVF - they can screen for the best embryos. That one I'm never 100% sure of but the technology does exist.

Sarah

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By *hagulikeMan
over a year ago

Essex

Can top you all

My friend had hers at 47 and is the perfect mum from what I can tell you would never know. The dad is fair bit older so that may be issue later on. But another thought is being older you hang out at school with the younger mums and dads. Surely that can have some benifits

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

everyone is different, you make your own decision not based on what others think

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

30s 40s to becoming more normal as some like to work and get there house and things in order so don't have to worry .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well tbh i had my four before i was 26

tho my sister had her daughter at 37 and she said that labour was hard

a couple of my friends had babies in the 40s and said they wish they had had them early

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

I'm a step dad to a two year old .. I'm having a great time.. I hope that he is too

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"30s 40s to becoming more normal as some like to work and get there house and things in order so don't have to worry ."

What if the house and things weren't in order

New relationship etc ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"30s 40s to becoming more normal as some like to work and get there house and things in order so don't have to worry .

What if the house and things weren't in order

New relationship etc ??

"
I would still do it myself. x I found it easy in 30s then 20s ..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had the first one at 36 and the second one at 41. Wouldn't have had it any other way.

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By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple

Having my kids and bringing them up alone was a challange. If I had got pregnant in my 40's I would have been horrified. Thankfully I no longer have to worry about that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"30s 40s to becoming more normal as some like to work and get there house and things in order so don't have to worry .

What if the house and things weren't in order

New relationship etc ??

There is never a perfect time...but in a new relationship is something i wouldn't deliberately do.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"I think it can be a selfish thing to do having a child late on in life.

You might be in a better place and may suit you better?

But what about the child?

Your going to be as old as the child's peers grandparents.

As much as you think your still going to be young trendy and hip you won't be. Only in your head you will be.

You won't have the physical energy as a younger parent to be able to share things with your child on a physical level as much.

What you learnt at school in studying will be by far obsolete to what it would be if you were a younger parent.

You will die when your children are still relatively young.

They may have to become your carers as you age.

And not to mention the possible complications during pregnancy in later life and the risks of having a baby with birth defects.

This is only my personal opinion and from my own experience as a child with elderly parents that's all.

This pretty much sums up my personal view and why I was sterilised at the same time I had my last child, a week after my 31st birthday.

As an aside: kids will always be embarrassed about their parents. My friends son was embarrassed because people thought she was his girlfriend

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"everyone is different, you make your own decision not based on what others think"

In a nutshell really.

Regardless of what others say people do what they want.

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By *albec26Man
over a year ago

Great Yarmouth

We had our children later in life as we wanted to travel and enjoy life before being tied down. At 40 we have four fantastic children all under eight and we feel that being older and more established we have more time for them then we soul have 20 years ago whilst trying to forge careers etc xx

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"30s 40s to becoming more normal as some like to work and get there house and things in order so don't have to worry ."

My daughter had her first in November, twins, she was 32 and said she felt an old mum. She did just that, got her Masters, travelled the world for work, married, bought a house then started a family.

The other two 24 and 28 are following suit. Irony is I'm retiring early, selling up to move closer to my eldest to help look after the grandchildren!

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"30s 40s to becoming more normal as some like to work and get there house and things in order so don't have to worry .

What if the house and things weren't in order

New relationship etc ??

Why would anyone of that age then contemplate bringing a child into such an environment?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"30s 40s to becoming more normal as some like to work and get there house and things in order so don't have to worry .

My daughter had her first in November, twins, she was 32 and said she felt an old mum. She did just that, got her Masters, travelled the world for work, married, bought a house then started a family.

The other two 24 and 28 are following suit. Irony is I'm retiring early, selling up to move closer to my eldest to help look after the grandchildren!

I had my last child at the grand old age of 21,and now I'm still looking after children so my children can work,instead of gallivanting all over the world enjoying myself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My aunt from my dad's side has my cousin very late in life. He's 22 now & honestly she looks like his nan

she looks like my nan to me aswell! Way she walks, talks & goes about its identical.

But better late than never I suppose

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"30s 40s to becoming more normal as some like to work and get there house and things in order so don't have to worry .

My daughter had her first in November, twins, she was 32 and said she felt an old mum. She did just that, got her Masters, travelled the world for work, married, bought a house then started a family.

The other two 24 and 28 are following suit. Irony is I'm retiring early, selling up to move closer to my eldest to help look after the grandchildren!

I had my last child at the grand old age of 21,and now I'm still looking after children so my children can work,instead of gallivanting all over the world enjoying myself. "

The ironies of life. I had them young so I would still be young enough to travel and spend my money on me. Instead of moving out of the south east I'm moving to Berkshire to help look after the grandchildren with the other grandma to enable my daughter to work, but also within 90 minutes of London and Kent for the other two when they need me.

The best laid plans of mice and men!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think it can be a selfish thing to do having a child late on in life.

You might be in a better place and may suit you better?

But what about the child?

Your going to be as old as the child's peers grandparents.

As much as you think your still going to be young trendy and hip you won't be. Only in your head you will be.

You won't have the physical energy as a younger parent to be able to share things with your child on a physical level as much.

What you learnt at school in studying will be by far obsolete to what it would be if you were a younger parent.

You will die when your children are still relatively young.

They may have to become your carers as you age.

And not to mention the possible complications during pregnancy in later life and the risks of having a baby with birth defects.

This is only my personal opinion and from my own experience as a child with elderly parents that's all.

Homework - Google is the friend of ALL parents these days - teaching methods change on a very regular basis so little that even the youngest parents studied is relevant!

'You'll be dead whilst they're relatively young!' - I genuinely believe that set numbers for longevity/quality of life now are obsolete! It depends entirely on how you take care of your body/mind throughout life! I expect to live far longer than someone now in their twenties who drinks heavily, smokes and is morbidly obese - and that's a fairly large proportion of them these days - particularly where I live in the North West!

'They'll be as old as the other kids grandparents! ' - thanks to birth control and career opportunities for women in the last generation - there isn't really a standard age for women to have children now - it's common from around 14 (in some cases sadly) to around 50!

I was 23, 35 and 36 when I had my kids - and I did pretty well in the parents relay race at sports day last year!!

Most of my children's friends are career women and not much different in age to me!

I adore my kids and can't imagine life without them!

Good look op - whatever your friend decides - and big hugs!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"30s 40s to becoming more normal as some like to work and get there house and things in order so don't have to worry .

What if the house and things weren't in order

New relationship etc ??

Why would anyone of that age then contemplate bringing a child into such an environment?

It wasn't planned.

She wouldn't need the fathers support financially if he decided not to stay around

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have 4.... They are 20 18 16 and 11....do the maths... Love them all to bits and no problems with being an "older" parent

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Became a dad again at 49! One of the best 'mistakes' I ever made!

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By *AA123Couple
over a year ago

Lichfield

[Removed by poster at 09/05/16 12:09:44]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I got pregnant when I was 38 it has been the making of me.

It has certainly not been plain sailing but she makes my life worth living x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Adoption is an option.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think it can be a selfish thing to do having a child late on in life.

You might be in a better place and may suit you better?

But what about the child?

Your going to be as old as the child's peers grandparents.

As much as you think your still going to be young trendy and hip you won't be. Only in your head you will be.

You won't have the physical energy as a younger parent to be able to share things with your child on a physical level as much.

What you learnt at school in studying will be by far obsolete to what it would be if you were a younger parent.

You will die when your children are still relatively young.

They may have to become your carers as you age.

And not to mention the possible complications during pregnancy in later life and the risks of having a baby with birth defects.

This is only my personal opinion and from my own experience as a child with elderly parents that's all.

You can still lose your parents when they have you young. I was orphaned at 6.

But this is all anecdotal anyway.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't ever have regrets for the things you have not done. I don't have any children... now at 40; with no long-term relationship I concede I will not be a father again.

I have regrets... if you want it, go for it

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

"Adoption is an option. "

For some not for all

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Adoption is an option. "

Give up a child for adoption ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had my only child at 37. I have felt quite self conscious around parents of other children my daughter's age, because I'm always the oldest by some distance. Still, I realize I'm being silly and it doesn't matter.

I do wish I had had a child much younger, but my little treasure is my everything no matter what.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Adoption is an option.

Give up a child for adoption ? "

Accept a child for adoption, as an alternative to conceiving your own.

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By *ooking75Man
over a year ago

Dudley

"I think it can be a selfish thing to do having a child late on in life.

You might be in a better place and may suit you better?

But what about the child?

Your going to be as old as the child's peers grandparents.

As much as you think your still going to be young trendy and hip you won't be. Only in your head you will be.

You won't have the physical energy as a younger parent to be able to share things with your child on a physical level as much.

What you learnt at school in studying will be by far obsolete to what it would be if you were a younger parent.

You will die when your children are still relatively young.

They may have to become your carers as you age.

And not to mention the possible complications during pregnancy in later life and the risks of having a baby with birth defects.

This is only my personal opinion and from my own experience as a child with elderly parents that's all.

I can do everything I did as a younger lady and it's my little boy that makes me feel like that

but your 45 now and your child is 8 that would have made you 37 when you had him, not really an older parent, i think reading the thread we are talking women being 40+ when falling pregnant not women in their 40s who have kids

My mum was in her 50s when she fell pregnant with me, it wasnt a choice she got cought going through the menopause, she said she though she was past getting pregnant obviously she wasn't, im the youngest of 5, there's 21 year's difference between me and my next youngest sibling, people used to think my eldest sister was my mum when she picked me up from school, her own kids were older than me

when i started school my dad was 64 although they were good parents and i loved them dearly it wasnt like the other kids, my parents never took me swimming or like the guy above my dad didn't play football with me because by the time i got to that age he had worked all his life, retired and was looking to rest like most pensioners not looking to kick a ball round a field with a young child he couldn't keep up with, its ok every now and again but at that age you cant keep up with a young child on a daily basis

To me 30s isnt an older mum

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think it can be a selfish thing to do having a child late on in life.

You might be in a better place and may suit you better?

But what about the child?

Your going to be as old as the child's peers grandparents.

As much as you think your still going to be young trendy and hip you won't be. Only in your head you will be.

You won't have the physical energy as a younger parent to be able to share things with your child on a physical level as much.

What you learnt at school in studying will be by far obsolete to what it would be if you were a younger parent.

You will die when your children are still relatively young.

They may have to become your carers as you age.

And not to mention the possible complications during pregnancy in later life and the risks of having a baby with birth defects.

This is only my personal opinion and from my own experience as a child with elderly parents that's all.

I can do everything I did as a younger lady and it's my little boy that makes me feel like that

To me 30s isnt an older mum "

Agree as this is my experience too

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By *etter the devil you knowWoman
over a year ago

Lyndhurst

"Don't ever have regrets for the things you have not done. I don't have any children... now at 40; with no long-term relationship I concede I will not be a father again.

I have regrets... if you want it, go for it"

people regret having kids too, only they don't like to admit it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you want them have them!!! Don't over think it just do it

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By *he Devils Daughter!Woman
over a year ago

some where in yorkshire

"What's people's views. Opinions and real life experiences with becoming a parent later in life ?........

Asking for a friend.

"
if anyone is lucky enough to have a child/children age shouldn't matter as long as u can care for them n give them love n happiness n a loving home I unfortunately lost my first child at 20 wks pregnant n after that was told I couldn't conceive again so was beyond upset but after an op last ur was told I have a good chance of conceiving in the next yr-2 yrs but my age keeps putting me off even thou I have the mindset of a 20 yr old I know I'm mature enough to do it n have so much love to give but at my age it's a tad scary X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My mum was 43 when she had me I haven't had a child yet and I'm 36 the longer it goes on the more resigned I am that maybe I won't be so lucky to have a child and just getting on with life.

The day you get pregnant which I believe would be around a Xmas time when you found out, I will be very happy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My mum was 43 when she had me I haven't had a child yet and I'm 36 the longer it goes on the more resigned I am that maybe I won't be so lucky to have a child and just getting on with life.

The day you get pregnant which I believe would be around a Xmas time when you found out, I will be very happy. "

Me too- have faith Cheeky- you never know what's around the corner xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My father is a lot older and I've always hated it .

Myself however I worry about having babies later in life due to complications , but I may do if I met the right person Or if I hadn't already got some and the urge was there

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By *om and JennieCouple
over a year ago

Chams or Socials

I was 25 & 30 when my 2 were born. I would have liked more but wasn't prepared to spend another 4 years trying due to my fertility issues.

Both times I was one of the younger parents at the school gates which surprised me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Adoption is an option.

Give up a child for adoption ?

Accept a child for adoption, as an alternative to conceiving your own. "

Maybe I should have posted the person had recently found that they are expecting. Hence the post

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My youngest was born when I was 45 and I wouldn't have it any other way. They keep you young at heart.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"30s 40s to becoming more normal as some like to work and get there house and things in order so don't have to worry .

What if the house and things weren't in order

New relationship etc ??

Things have a way of working themselves out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Message me v if u wanna chat X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Adoption is an option.

Give up a child for adoption ?

Accept a child for adoption, as an alternative to conceiving your own.

Maybe I should have posted the person had recently found that they are expecting. Hence the post "

Well that puts a completely different spin on it really doesn't it??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had mine quite young and so glad I did. Enjoying the grandchildren now

Something that you may not have the chance to do if you have kids much later in life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I had mine quite young and so glad I did. Enjoying the grandchildren now

Something that you may not have the chance to do if you have kids much later in life."

I didn't think of that when I was pregnant, but after having my daughter I started to realise I was less likely to be around for grandchildren. And I really want grandchildren.

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By *etter the devil you knowWoman
over a year ago

Lyndhurst

I had my son when I was way too young, but the good thing is I wont be having any grandkids and im glad because I don't want any.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i think id be suicidal if i found out i was pregnant now

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By *ammykingMan
over a year ago

Lisburn

"What's people's views. Opinions and real life experiences with becoming a parent later in life ?........

Asking for a friend.

I'm already a parent

some say it's too young but I wouldn't change it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What's people's views. Opinions and real life experiences with becoming a parent later in life ?........

Asking for a friend.

I didn't want children when I was younger, I was far too selfish plus I had a great life, had some great jobs and travelled all over the place. Add to that the fact that I wasn't maternal in any way....I just thought children got in the way...

Eventually I settled down and we decided the time was right .... we were both 38 and looking back it was a rather arrogant of me to think I would fall pregnant more or less straightaway but I did, so I became a mum at 39. It was a good job we decided not to wait any longer as the following year the menopause started so I really was very lucky...being an older mum is great, I would absolutely recommend it and it goes without saying he is the best thing that ever happened to me

(the ex is long gone though

)

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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago

in the suffolk countryside

"Adoption is an option.

Give up a child for adoption ?

Accept a child for adoption, as an alternative to conceiving your own. "
i have considered this and fostering...but i wouldnt have any older than my youngest..ill consider it again in the future, for now i am like a second mum to a lot of my older kids friends...they love hanging out with us..i like that x

my kids are 23,21, 15 and 7..so im an older and a younger mum..and no none of my kids are embarrassed about me..i even get invited out with the older ones and their friends, who dont believe i'm their mum..but then i have a great communicative and open relationship with them..that takes the adult, making the effort..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Adoption is an option.

Give up a child for adoption ?

Accept a child for adoption, as an alternative to conceiving your own. i have considered this and fostering...but i wouldnt have any older than my youngest..ill consider it again in the future, for now i am like a second mum to a lot of my older kids friends...they love hanging out with us..i like that x

Yes but you're only 44....and your youngest is 7...so you're not exactly an older mum?

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By *om and JennieCouple
over a year ago

Chams or Socials

"i think id be suicidal if i found out i was pregnant now

Quite a few of my friends have had babies at 39/40. They are just starting parenthood whilst I'm thinking GCSE's, colleges, driving lessons & careers!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I had a friend that had her first at 49!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But don't you have more problems being older having a child ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"But don't you have more problems being older having a child ?"

such as?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I had a friend that had her first at 49!!"

how old is the friend you are asking for, btw?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I had a friend that had her first at 49!!

how old is the friend you are asking for, btw?"

Not exactly a friend ......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Meaning like the child having problems

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I had a friend that had her first at 49!!

how old is the friend you are asking for, btw?

Not exactly a friend ......

ohhhh I see

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Meaning like the child having problems "

can you be more specific? do you have any stats, for instance?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What's people's views. Opinions and real life experiences with becoming a parent later in life ?........

Asking for a friend.

Get an egg count

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Like down syndrome

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By *om and JennieCouple
over a year ago

Chams or Socials

"Like down syndrome "

Apparently risk is still pretty low - @775 children per year are born with Down Dyndrome

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Meaning like the child having problems "

its actually more of a risk for the mother having a child later in life than the child

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"i think id be suicidal if i found out i was pregnant now

Saw a recent story of a woman my age (55) giving birth to triplets. I see my grandsons once a week and happily hand them back.

I felt very sorry for the children because their mother came across as a shallow, immature, selfish, delusional woman. Her age was the least of her problems.

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By *rank n BettyCouple
over a year ago

Not meeting

"i think id be suicidal if i found out i was pregnant now

Saw a recent story of a woman my age (55) giving birth to triplets. I see my grandsons once a week and happily hand them back.

I felt very sorry for the children because their mother came across as a shallow, immature, selfish, delusional woman. Her age was the least of her problems."

Weren't hers IVF? She had a younger partner?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Like down syndrome "

the risk is quite low...its because older mothers tend to have fewer babies but 75% of babies born with downs syndrome are born to mothers under 35

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh right fair enough I was only saying wasn't being out of order or anything. I know someone who had 2 kids and had one later in life And she was down syndrome.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The age of the mother is the only factor that has been shown to increase the risk of having a baby with Down syndrome. This risk increases with every year, especially after the mother is 35 years of age. However, because younger women are more likely to have babies than older women, 80% of babies with Down syndrome are born to women younger than 35 years of age.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh right fair enough I was only saying wasn't being out of order or anything. I know someone who had 2 kids and had one later in life And she was down syndrome. "

a lady I worked with was pregnant at the same time as me but was 2 years younger...she agreed to have the test to check for downs syndrome, whereas I didn't because of the obvious complications....her test was positive but she chose to keep the baby anyway ... my baby had some complications, which didn't present themselves until he was 9 months old but they were nothing on the scale of downs syndrome

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"i think id be suicidal if i found out i was pregnant now

Saw a recent story of a woman my age (55) giving birth to triplets. I see my grandsons once a week and happily hand them back.

I felt very sorry for the children because their mother came across as a shallow, immature, selfish, delusional woman. Her age was the least of her problems.

Weren't hers IVF? She had a younger partner? "

That's the one. Went to Cyprus for the ivf as UK have age limit of 42. 12 weeks hospital bed rest as babies were in distress but she sneaks out to have botox and hair extensions to look glamorous.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

[Removed by poster at 10/05/16 08:30:16]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"30s 40s to becoming more normal as some like to work and get there house and things in order so don't have to worry .

My daughter had her first in November, twins, she was 32 and said she felt an old mum. She did just that, got her Masters, travelled the world for work, married, bought a house then started a family.

The other two 24 and 28 are following suit. Irony is I'm retiring early, selling up to move closer to my eldest to help look after the grandchildren!

"
To me that lovely as I love my family. Lucky you I say. x

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By *ammykingMan
over a year ago

Lisburn

"i think id be suicidal if i found out i was pregnant now

Saw a recent story of a woman my age (55) giving birth to triplets. I see my grandsons once a week and happily hand them back.

I felt very sorry for the children because their mother came across as a shallow, immature, selfish, delusional woman. Her age was the least of her problems.

Weren't hers IVF? She had a younger partner?

That's the one. Went to Cyprus for the ivf as UK have age limit of 42. 12 weeks hospital bed rest as babies were in distress but she sneaks out to have botox and hair extensions to look glamorous.

She wasn't related to that vile cow Josie Cunnigham was she?

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"30s 40s to becoming more normal as some like to work and get there house and things in order so don't have to worry .

My daughter had her first in November, twins, she was 32 and said she felt an old mum. She did just that, got her Masters, travelled the world for work, married, bought a house then started a family.

The other two 24 and 28 are following suit. Irony is I'm retiring early, selling up to move closer to my eldest to help look after the grandchildren!

To me that lovely as I love my family. Lucky you I say. x"

It's a cunning plan Jo. I help them, and when I get doddery I have help on hand.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"i think id be suicidal if i found out i was pregnant now

Saw a recent story of a woman my age (55) giving birth to triplets. I see my grandsons once a week and happily hand them back.

I felt very sorry for the children because their mother came across as a shallow, immature, selfish, delusional woman. Her age was the least of her problems.

Weren't hers IVF? She had a younger partner?

That's the one. Went to Cyprus for the ivf as UK have age limit of 42. 12 weeks hospital bed rest as babies were in distress but she sneaks out to have botox and hair extensions to look glamorous.

She wasn't related to that vile cow Josie Cunnigham was she?

She's 25 with low self esteem and quite sad I think. The 55 year old on the other hand appears selfish, vain, stupid and immature to me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Best thing ever being an older parent. I have 3 children. One is 15, one is 11 and one is 5. You have generally got your madness out of your system and can settle down. You tend to be wiser, calmer and appreciate what you have in life. As for not winning the dads egg and spoon race on sports day, big deal!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I say go for it, it's pot luck of the child has special needs and asking as you know the risks of this were to happen then all good.

I've had fertility issues and if I was to be lucky enough to meet a decent fella and got pregnant then happy days.

I've also had friends use clinics like the one in Cyprus Infact one of my friends used said clinic she's 41 and had a healthy baby in febuary.

There is a very good website on the net in box me and I will give you the name it covers lots of topics like this and I've made some brilliant friends in the same situation over the years.

Go for it I say

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