FabSwingers.com forum: Zip it!!

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

How often do you open a thread, start typing something and then think better of it?....several times this morning I've had to physically wrench my phone out of my hand because I'm desperate to make a comment but know that it's going to get me in trouble....i know, right? Who thought that i had any sort of filter on what i say??

Are you able to hold back on what you say, or are you always compelled to say it as you see it regardless of the consequences?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just say what I feel. I've been banned twice for speaking the truth.

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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago

Filthy Fuckeryville

I've got myself in trouble more than once for speaking my mind

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I tend to do similar!

Sometimes I think fuck it and delete, not because I am worried about a ban more because I know I will be wasting my metaphorical breath!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah I can bite my tongue when I need to!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Many times I've had to. I'm sure if I said what I wanted I would have been banned.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've done this on quite a few occasions. I've even typed out a wacking great long post, then deleted it cos I thought better of it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do it and get a small ban from the forums!

some people on here just need to be told

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By *adyboy-DaddyCouple
over a year ago

Andover

[Removed by poster at 06/05/16 08:05:54]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i end up deleting more than i actually post. lol

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"I tend to do similar!

Sometimes I think fuck it and delete, not because I am worried about a ban more because I know I will be wasting my metaphorical breath! "

This every time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I tend to do similar!

Sometimes I think fuck it and delete, not because I am worried about a ban more because I know I will be wasting my metaphorical breath! "

Same here.

Sometimes I don't get as far as typing......

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By *adyboy-DaddyCouple
over a year ago

Andover

I tend to express myself. I've been banned a number of times, once I felt was entirely justified, other times I said something to the "wrong" person and that'l do the trick.

I don't insult people or call them names and I am completely happy to accept that others have differing views. That's pretty much all you do really.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I tend to do similar!

Sometimes I think fuck it and delete, not because I am worried about a ban more because I know I will be wasting my metaphorical breath! "

Yes i can relate to this...often.

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By *asokittyWoman
over a year ago

Nr Worksop

"How often do you open a thread, start typing something and then think better of it?....several times this morning I've had to physically wrench my phone out of my hand because I'm desperate to make a comment but know that it's going to get me in trouble....i know, right? Who thought that i had any sort of filter on what i say??

Are you able to hold back on what you say, or are you always compelled to say it as you see it regardless of the consequences?"

I feel like I have to hold back what i want to say sometimes. I have been suspended from forum for speaking my mind. Doesn't sit well with me but when in someone else's hone you obey the rule's. Like it or not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

guilty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It depends on how bolshie I am feeling...

Occasionally I will type something and post it...

Then go back and delete it

mostly I have to stop myself but the odd one gets past the filters if I'm feeling argumentative

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By *om and JennieCouple
over a year ago

Chams or Socials

The last time I said something that really need to be said I put that I knew I would get the naughty step & was more than prepared for it.

The 48 hours was so worth it & I'd do it all again if I had to.

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

Most of the time, I haven't even started typing before thinking, no I just can't be bothered with this one.

It's not because I'm worried about getting put on the naughty step or incurring the wrath of other posters. Just that it's going to end up falling on deaf ears anyway and it's a waste of my fingers.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I walk away the nastiness on here and bigotry is shocking sometimes X

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By *adyboy-DaddyCouple
over a year ago

Andover

I find myself adding "caveats" to my posts as I know people sit and try to find ways to be offended or take issue with something just because of the way it has been phrased. I did this 5 minute ago in a post pointing out that my use of the word "gimmick" was not intended in a derogatory way, I just couldn't think of another word that suited.

In spite of the caveat, the next post seemed to take issue with my use of the word.

It's the nature of forums, I guess. And boredom!

(I'm not suggesting your all boring cunts ok?)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I tend to do similar!

Sometimes I think fuck it and delete, not because I am worried about a ban more because I know I will be wasting my metaphorical breath!

Same here.

Sometimes I don't get as far as typing......"

Ditto. I've typed out many posts,had my finger hovering over the 'post message' countless times..... then with a sigh I've deleted my words.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I find myself adding "caveats" to my posts as I know people sit and try to find ways to be offended or take issue with something just because of the way it has been phrased. I did this 5 minute ago in a post pointing out that my use of the word "gimmick" was not intended in a derogatory way, I just couldn't think of another word that suited.

In spite of the caveat, the next post seemed to take issue with my use of the word.

It's the nature of forums, I guess. And boredom!

(I'm not suggesting your all boring cunts ok?)

Well I'm offended you think I'm a boring cunt

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By *ervent_fervourMan
over a year ago

Halifax

I find it hard(to stop myself).

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman
over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!

I am able to at times,other times I'm not!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just talk bollocks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Very occasionally, once leading to a 48hr ban which truthfully I deserved. Mostly I have the opposite problem and have to muster up the motivation to post! Especially since having a couples profile instead of a singles as my posts are 10 times more likely to elicit no response now, so I just think 'what's the point?'

Nell

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman
over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!

What annoys me is when you get a ban and you haven't a clue which thread it's from. You should be told exactly the one it is,it's a bit like telling a child off and not telling them exactly what they've done wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It falls on deaf ears in here so I think what's the point of saying it. But away from fab I'm not afraid to speak my mind. I say it as it, if I offend then too bad but that's just me

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

If you pick the right words you CAN say what you want without getting into trouble. Attack the post, not the poster.

Having said that, I have given up half way through a post because I know people will choose to take it the wrong way. I don't dwell.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I stop myself commenting constantly for lots of reasons. Although sometimes I don't

I think people would be quite surprised by the number of time outs I've actually had

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A lot of times I lose my train of thought and ramble,or I forget what I'm going to say and delete my post.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh so many times, paid the price for the things I have said.

I think we should be allowed a 24 hour forum amnisty

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"What annoys me is when you get a ban and you haven't a clue which thread it's from. You should be told exactly the one it is,it's a bit like telling a child off and not telling them exactly what they've done wrong

Yes I've been left scratching my head before thinking which specific thing i said....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The last time I said something that really need to be said I put that I knew I would get the naughty step & was more than prepared for it.

The 48 hours was so worth it & I'd do it all again if I had to. "

uxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes here I will use a filter from time to time to prevent problems in the future.

For work I will do this a lot. I will write the email and come back to it a few hours later and reread, if I still feel the same I will send if not I will adjust and then send.

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By *om and JennieCouple
over a year ago

Chams or Socials

"The last time I said something that really need to be said I put that I knew I would get the naughty step & was more than prepared for it.

The 48 hours was so worth it & I'd do it all again if I had to.

uxx"

you tooooooo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I try to remember that it's their opinions! But I really want to kick their dumb arse then run like hell

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you pick the right words you CAN say what you want without getting into trouble. Attack the post, not the poster.

Having said that, I have given up half way through a post because I know people will choose to take it the wrong way. I don't dwell."

I agree with you.

But sadly some people enjoy openly attacking the poster.

You only have to view the green arrow to see who actively enjoys personally attacking people on the forums.

There's a big difference between posting a thread and discussing the thread on the forums to personally using the thread topic or posts to personally victimise the posters.

It's just the way forums are and unfortunately there will always be a few of types of people on them.

They are easy to spot though on the forums.

They'd argue with their own shadows

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By *ngel n tedCouple
over a year ago

maidstone

"Very occasionally, once leading to a 48hr ban which truthfully I deserved. Mostly I have the opposite problem and have to muster up the motivation to post! Especially since having a couples profile instead of a singles as my posts are 10 times more likely to elicit no response now, so I just think 'what's the point?'

Nell"

Yea this, without the 48 hr ban, i believe i've served a 24 hr one. Also the fact that we've had a couples profile all the time i've been in the forums.

But other than that....yea this

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

It takes a fair bit to wind me up on here, so I just don't bother

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By *ingle Beds LassWoman
over a year ago

Bedfordshire

I type then delete... It isn't worth the pile of crap you get for having an opinion. Too many keyboard warriers on here and sheeple.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's very rare I don't really consider what I comment. I'm more inclined to step back from the drama that erupts out of nowhere here sometimes. In real life, I state my opinion clearly and honestly.

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman
over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!

"I try to remember that it's their opinions! But I really want to kick their dumb arse then run like hell

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hold back what I say on most threads and instead just make derogatory comments about myself

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I hold back what I say on most threads and instead just make derogatory comments about myself

I've recently started being nice....jeez it's hard work

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I hold back what I say on most threads and instead just make derogatory comments about myself

I've recently started being nice....jeez it's hard work

Nice is really hard work as most of us have moved beyond the nice boy and nice girl when we were going through puberty if not before

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yup I have been guilty of that I'm findin these days now that I can hold my tounge much to everyone's relife I'm sure.

xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I suffer from verbal diarrhoea I'm always putting my foot in it............. Sit on my face

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pretty good at thinking before hitting the big button, barring one minor error of judgement a couple of weeks back when a tongue in cheek jokey comment was taken mahusively more seriously than intended.

Really wanted to comment on a few things recently where I was specifically named, derided, put down, insulted and generally lambasted (oddly naming and making derogatory comments is only a no go area for some it would seem), but took the option to smile graciously and move on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's very rare I don't really consider what I comment. I'm more inclined to step back from the drama that erupts out of nowhere here sometimes. In real life, I state my opinion clearly and honestly. "

Even in real life I only state my views when I think they'll add value or if I feel really passionate about it, otherwise I find keeping my own counsel a better course of action.

In terms of speaking honestly and truthfully about myself and how I feel (justified or not), I have opened myself up a few times in the past, with those I really should not shared my vulnerability. So I am very selective now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That said there are a few things I can't help myself over and it usually involves something I think is funny and makes me giggle, bust I'm pretty sure makes me look even more of a crackpot than usual

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That said there are a few things I can't help myself over and it usually involves something I think is funny and makes me giggle, bust I'm pretty sure makes me look even more of a crackpot than usual

Your probably one of the wisest Doctors in here old boy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your probably one of the wisest Doctors in here old boy

"
nah just an old fool

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your probably one of the wisest Doctors in here old boy

nah just an old fool

Let's have a man hug

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fear of judgment, oppresses spontaneity, conviction and creativity. The quashing of these elements is a detriment to constructive debate. Posting controversy can reveal much insight from the reactions.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

I'm often glad if my screen freezes, so I don't post. Otherwise I'm also happy to stop after a little reflection.

Self awareness and restraint are helpful habits to develop.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The fact that no one knows your humour, whether the comment is intended to shock or is said tongue in cheek or whether you are being deadly serious is one of the main reasons certain comments get jumped on...

Another reason is if people don't frame the question they are asking properly which brings out the judgemental folk and the sarcy comments...

And a few numpties just post any old shite under the umbrella of 'having a debate' which is a thinly disguised way of setting people against each other...

I like to join in when I can but some people do get arsey about it.. And this is what I don't understand... It's an open forum, right?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Fear of judgment, oppresses spontaneity, conviction and creativity. The quashing of these elements is a detriment to constructive debate. Posting controversy can reveal much insight from the reactions.

Food for thought, as ever...i don't think i fear being judged, well not exactly anyway. It's more Complex than that. One of my biggest faults is my lack of tolerance, especially where i think someone is showing weakness or ignorance or just plain stupidity, and sometimes the way i express that can sound mean or harsh. I'm not really a mean person and i guess i do hold back because of the way i will be perceived by others. But only because that isn't a true portrayal of me....I'm not mean...just intolerant. I guess my empathetic side isn't fully developed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are you able to hold back on what you say, or are you always compelled to say it as you see it regardless of the consequences?"

If I feel compelled to make a comment then I usually (but not always) do - but I try to self-filter it to make sure it does not come out as offensive- partly because I'm not keen on forum bans - but mostly because I don't get a kick out of offending/hurting people's feelings!

I find the 'getting into trouble' a little confusing and inconsistent though - last weekend I was convinced id have 48hrs to catch up on housework etc - even planned in my head what I was going to do - but it didn't happen!

I don't get het up now when I get in trouble though - I've occasionally swapped banter with the mods when 'in trouble ' - but if someone - accidentally or deliberately - takes something I've said the wrong way or out of context and turns it into something insulting - then I get upset! I like the vast majority of people on here and want them to like me - I guess that makes me a bit sad!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Many a time I have had to stop myself the naughty step is a cold lonely place.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Empathy is often regarded as a bastion of compassion. It is, in my opinion overrated and serves only to highlight ones plight. Without solution, empathy is a patronisingly hollow cul de sac.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your probably one of the wisest Doctors in here old boy

nah just an old fool

Let's have a man hug

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

banned a few times from chat rooms, speaking my mind, tend just to say hi now and perv cams lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Empathy is often regarded as a bastion of compassion. It is, in my opinion overrated and serves only to highlight ones plight. Without solution, empathy is a patronisingly hollow cul de sac."

Admit it - you got that out of a very expensive fortune cookie didn't you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yeah I can bite my tongue when I need to!

Me too, but sometimes it gets too much!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Empathy is often regarded as a bastion of compassion. It is, in my opinion overrated and serves only to highlight ones plight. Without solution, empathy is a patronisingly hollow cul de sac.

Admit it - you got that out of a very expensive fortune cookie didn't you?

Aahh soh...some would say. Only the best for you blossom.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Yeah I can bite my tongue when I need to!

Me too, but sometimes it gets too much!

Bit like Tourettes?

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

As this is just a platform for people to talk about their bans I am going to shut it.

Just to clarify, people don't get banned for airing their views, they do however get banned for airing their views in a way that breaks Fab rules.

Sometimes sitting on your hands is a better option

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