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First night and bottled it!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Dear agony aunts..I thought I had at last persuaded my Mrs to give swinging a go. We booked a Birmingham hotel Last week, set up a joint profile and got loads of replies. We were going to take it easy first just sensual massage unless she decided she wanted more. Then right at point of meeting, her bottle went and we didn't do it...Advice please on my next move. Frustrated of Chorley.

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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago

Beyond the shadows.

Have you tried clubs instead.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Have you tried clubs instead. "

I think that may be a bit too intimidating for her she's pretty conscious about her weight even though she's only a size 14 and sexy with it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Have you tried clubs instead. "

Probably an easier intro I'd have thought, there's the social bar bar bit too to give a chance to acclimatise ..or not?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Has anyone else had similar problems and come through it ?

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By *entaur_UKMan
over a year ago

Cannock


"Have you tried clubs instead.

I think that may be a bit too intimidating for her she's pretty conscious about her weight even though she's only a size 14 and sexy with it."

Try a dressed club then such as xtasia. Really is no pressure from anyone to play, as it's like a nightclub inside, you could treat your first visit as a trip to a normal nightclub and stay in the large bar/dance floor area.

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By *entaur_UKMan
over a year ago

Cannock


"Have you tried clubs instead.

I think that may be a bit too intimidating for her she's pretty conscious about her weight even though she's only a size 14 and sexy with it.

Try a dressed club then such as xtasia. Really is no pressure from anyone to play, as it's like a nightclub inside, you could treat your first visit as a trip to a normal nightclub and stay in the large bar/dance floor area. "

Forgot to say dress as you would to a normal nightclub.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Have you tried clubs instead.

I think that may be a bit too intimidating for her she's pretty conscious about her weight even though she's only a size 14 and sexy with it.

Try a dressed club then such as xtasia. Really is no pressure from anyone to play, as it's like a nightclub inside, you could treat your first visit as a trip to a normal nightclub and stay in the large bar/dance floor area.

Forgot to say dress as you would to a normal nightclub."

Even I've gone there and stayed clothed, and that's saying something Xtasia is a great club as Centaur says, and definitely a no pressure environment

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By *ondonSwingSocialCouple
over a year ago

London

Like I said on the other thread:

If you want to swing, but one of you isn't comfortable doing it, don't get frustrated because they may be frustrated too.

It's perfectly normal to dip out at the last minute, especially if you are the one being introduced to the idea.

Remember not to force the idea on your partner.

Your frustration may come from a place of you wanting to indulge in the idea, getting excited and it not happening.

What is important to remember is that your partner has to trust you and you have to trust your partner.

Small baby steps I say and open honest communication with each other as to what you want from swinging.

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By *ondonSwingSocialCouple
over a year ago

London

Owww yes socials are great wayservice for new people in the scene to meet experienced swingers. Especially because most are in a public venue and can be treated as a normal night out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Far too rushed, go at your partners pace and chill out.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Have you tried clubs instead.

I think that may be a bit too intimidating for her she's pretty conscious about her weight even though she's only a size 14 and sexy with it.

Try a dressed club then such as xtasia. Really is no pressure from anyone to play, as it's like a nightclub inside, you could treat your first visit as a trip to a normal nightclub and stay in the large bar/dance floor area. "

That sounds a like a plan..not too much preeesure

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Far too rushed, go at your partners pace and chill out. "

That's easy to say but I have so got the horn to try it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Far too rushed, go at your partners pace and chill out.

That's easy to say but I have so got the horn to try it."

Best bet is not to make it about you! Get body, her choice, let it be all about her and her pace regardless of your horn

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Far too rushed, go at your partners pace and chill out.

That's easy to say but I have so got the horn to try it.

Best bet is not to make it about you! Get body, her choice, let it be all about her and her pace regardless of your horn "

So hard to though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Far too rushed, go at your partners pace and chill out.

That's easy to say but I have so got the horn to try it.

Best bet is not to make it about you! Get body, her choice, let it be all about her and her pace regardless of your horn

So hard to though"

Well if it was easy everyone would be at it.

Have you done much talking and taken time to understand what the problem is ?

This isn't all about you and your needs, it's about the both of you enjoying it together. I'd take a couple of months out and work together and listen to one another, it's not a race. Take small steps and keep talking or she might back out altogether as she may think you'll just doing this to get your end away.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Far too rushed, go at your partners pace and chill out.

That's easy to say but I have so got the horn to try it.

Best bet is not to make it about you! Get body, her choice, let it be all about her and her pace regardless of your horn

So hard to though

Well if it was easy everyone would be at it.

Have you done much talking and taken time to understand what the problem is ?

This isn't all about you and your needs, it's about the both of you enjoying it together. I'd take a couple of months out and work together and listen to one another, it's not a race. Take small steps and keep talking or she might back out altogether as she may think you'll just doing this to get your end away. "

That would be nice though. But seriously I get it... I'll try to be patient and see how it goes.

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By *eerobCouple
over a year ago

solihull

Presumably op because you have a single profile on here with no mention of your other half it doesn't matter if she plays.... You will simply go ahead without her anyway??

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Try a day together at a spa type club naked sunbathing ..no pressure to play

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Why are u frustrated???

Patience is needed

She will letbunknow when she is ready

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Presumably op because you have a single profile on here with no mention of your other half it doesn't matter if she plays.... You will simply go ahead without her anyway?? "

Feeling like I'm up against it here but have a look in the swingers chat forum. I've had a few replies similar to this. Hope what I said explains it.

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