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That's not my bag baby!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

You may remember the famous line:

"That's not my bag baby!" from Austin Powers, where a Swedish Cock Pump is removed from his luggage?

Well, apart from the stigma attached to the device.. i.e. it's only meant to be for men who can't get it up

I have to say that I do have one, and I do use it regularly! *stone me now and feed me to the crows*

I have no trouble getting it up, but I bought this device for a totally different reason. If you whack it on your willy for 10-20 mins, it makes it really fat and swollen (not uncomfortable) and increases the girth (temporarily) by about 25%!!

Just wondered if anyone else uses one and their thoughts on the matter?

Geordie

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By *resh freddieMan
over a year ago

Penistone

Are you for real????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ooooh yeah baby yeah pmsl

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ohhhhhhhh i say

knew a guy once with a torchlite thingy but just used it for whacking off, strange device, im only glad we didnt have a powercut as it would have been useless

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By *resh freddieMan
over a year ago

Penistone

So lets get his right you have a colostomy bag fitted right with a pump???

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

[Removed by poster at 02/07/09 17:48:45]

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By *resh freddieMan
over a year ago

Penistone


"wow some of those things are electrically powered and they reckon can increase girth and length is used over a period of time...There is the Venus 2000 what gives you a really good BJ evidently ..

as a disclaimer can i just say my knowledge is coincidental and i have never ...repeat never used or owned one of these devices ...rumour and conjecture to the contrary is pure that ...rumour and conjecture. "

Dear Marjorie

I have a friend who has.........

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"So lets get his right you have a colostomy bag fitted right with a pump??? "

Yes, that's exactly right

A half wit gave you a piece of his mind once and you didn't give it back, did you?

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

wow some of those things are electrically powered and they reckon can increase girth and length is used over a period of time...There is the Venus 2000 what gives you a really good BJ evidently ..

as a disclaimer can i just say my knowledge is coincidental and i have never ...repeat never used or owned one of these devices ...rumour and conjecture to the contrary is pure that ...rumour and conjecture.

can i also say i distance myself from the OP who called it a willy ....although i acknowledge his right to call it thus

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By *resh freddieMan
over a year ago

Penistone

Got ya lol you deleted tooooooooooo late

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Are all threads on here hijacked and taken off topic?

Always better to say nothing and be thought a fool, than to open your mouth and prove it.

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By *resh freddieMan
over a year ago

Penistone


"So lets get his right you have a colostomy bag fitted right with a pump???

Yes, that's exactly right

A half wit gave you a piece of his mind once and you didn't give it back, did you?"

Very droll mate you will have to do far better than that here. Thin your fingers are tired from all that pumping

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

can i just say that the venus 2000 is made by the same people who make that awsome machine the sybian ...and if women can have a good time with a machine why not men !!

just sayin it how it is !!!!

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By *resh freddieMan
over a year ago

Penistone


"can i just say that the venus 2000 is made by the same people who make that awsome machine the sybian ...and if women can have a good time with a machine why not men !!

just sayin it how it is !!!! "

Now your talking mate, the sybian is one cool bit of kit. I know a couple in Wakefield with one and ........well you have to smile

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"can i just say that the venus 2000 is made by the same people who make that awsome machine the sybian ...and if women can have a good time with a machine why not men !!

just sayin it how it is !!!!

Now your talking mate, the sybian is one cool bit of kit. I know a couple in Wakefield with one and ........well you have to smile"

its the dogs in my oppinion mate and designed on tantric techniques ...i have no reason to presume the venus2000 is any less a great product for as the OP said getting that extra girth and length ...as well as an automatic bj with finesse

so i understand ....fuck why am i so defensive !!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Now you know full well us women are better than any machine

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By *resh freddieMan
over a year ago

Penistone


"Now you know full well us women are better than any machine"

Do you ride by any chance young lady???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The machine maybe able to do all sorts but

can it lick ya ear ?

can it stroke you down the inside of your thinghs whilst softly taking your balls into its mouth and suck oh so gently ?

can it cook you bacon and eggs in the morning after shagging ya brains out ?

noooooooooooooooooooo

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"Now you know full well us women are better than any machine"

well i never done a machine ....looked at the hoover a few times but thought nahhhhh she aint my type ....pmsl

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By *thwalescplCouple
over a year ago

brecon

Saw a program on the tv a few weeks ago, subject was sexual health etc. On there was a bit about creams, pills and machines that claimed to enlarge your dick, and they set out to test the results with three guys. I was astounded when two of the three actually worked, with the biggest gain going to a thing that stretched the dick in between what looked like two clamps. Cant say I would want to spend up to an hour a day sat with a torture device strapped to my john thomas just to gain a few centimetres tho!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The machine maybe able to do all sorts but

can it lick ya ear ?

can it stroke you down the inside of your thighs whilst softly taking your balls into its mouth and suck oh so gently ?

can it cook you bacon and eggs in the morning after shagging ya brains out ?

noooooooooooooooooooo "

oops....smelling mistake

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By *resh freddieMan
over a year ago

Penistone

Smooth palms then!

As far as i know no pump will actually make a permanent increase in size. You would need about 1.7 bar to do that and there have been some really bad accidents if you care to goggle it.

My ex was a nurse and you would be surprised how many corpus collapses they have. Not nice i can assure you.

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"Saw a program on the tv a few weeks ago, subject was sexual health etc. On there was a bit about creams, pills and machines that claimed to enlarge your dick, and they set out to test the results with three guys. I was astounded when two of the three actually worked, with the biggest gain going to a thing that stretched the dick in between what looked like two clamps. Cant say I would want to spend up to an hour a day sat with a torture device strapped to my john thomas just to gain a few centimetres tho!!!"

yep designed by the guy in the gym i saw it last yeah it rolls it around like 2 bars and does work over time they reckon you can get an inch or more out of it ....and is in fact painless

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

look........

if ya want it longer, hang a cpl of bowling balls to it.

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By *resh freddieMan
over a year ago

Penistone


"The machine maybe able to do all sorts but

can it lick ya ear ?

can it stroke you down the inside of your thinghs whilst softly taking your balls into its mouth and suck oh so gently ?

can it cook you bacon and eggs in the morning after shagging ya brains out ?

noooooooooooooooooooo "

You do breakfast????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

oh yes

for my special men in my life

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By *resh freddieMan
over a year ago

Penistone


"oh yes

for my special men in my life"

Err quantify special?

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By *resh freddieMan
over a year ago

Penistone

A Slovak driver who ignored a give way sign and crashed into a bus was subsequently extracted from his car unconscious, half naked, and "with a vacuum pump on his penis", Channel 4 reports.

The unnamed 42-year-old was driving his old Citroen in the Slovak town of Levice when the accident occurred. Police officer Peter Polak told Reuters: "It's very likely he had auto-sex while driving: it is a matter of investigation. After the accident he was found lying in the seat, his pants were off and it [the pump] was placed on his penis."

Unsurprisingly, Polak added: "I've never seen anything like this, nor have my colleagues."

The man was taken to hospital with "head injuries", the report concludes.

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By *resh freddieMan
over a year ago

Penistone

My husband is freaking me out?

I thought it was a little weird when he asked me to buy him Extend penis enlargement pills 1 year ago. And now he takes them regularly. But now he just told me (demanded) me to order him a penis pump. I said thats a little crazy and they probably dont work. I added I love his penis the way it is. (and I really do).

Now I just read on a website that the penis pumps are very dangerous and can cause serious nerve damage to the actual penis.

What is his problem? If I say Im happy with his penis why is he insisting on this junk? Its a turn off. Can you imagine watching your husband pump his penis with a machine before you make love? HOW disgusting

Why is he thinking he needs this whats in his mind?

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago


"Saw a program on the tv a few weeks ago, subject was sexual health etc. On there was a bit about creams, pills and machines that claimed to enlarge your dick, and they set out to test the results with three guys. I was astounded when two of the three actually worked, with the biggest gain going to a thing that stretched the dick in between what looked like two clamps. Cant say I would want to spend up to an hour a day sat with a torture device strapped to my john thomas just to gain a few centimetres tho!!!"

If you stretch the length surely you lose the girth? what a waste of girth

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By *resh freddieMan
over a year ago

Penistone

moonspider

10-24-2003, 11:26 PM

i've been using a penis pump for over a couple of weeks ,when suddenly I noticed that the part below the head of my penish was swollen up.....

i stopped pumping and was starting to worry a lot

this is the first time this has ever happened, and I'm wondering how long will it take to heal

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By *resh freddieMan
over a year ago

Penistone

Not me i hasten to add

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

dunno but it sounds like ya blew ya balls up by mistake

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By *resh freddieMan
over a year ago

Penistone

Do Penis Pumps Work?

Trips and Photos July 29th, 2008

After years of dealing in myths and unreliable information, penis enlargement is now turning the corner joining the mainstream body enhancement markets through the sheer number of men who are actively improving the size of their penises. The fact that anybody can hide his true identity on the Internet has fostered the growth of this market as more and more men understood that they were in no danger of exposing their private problems to a judgmental world.

Still, the growing number of new customers looking for a solution to an embarrassing personal issue has caused in its turn a host of new problems. Most new customers need guidance because they have little knowledge of what products are worth their time and money and are too inexperienced to see through a clever scam. There are far too many dodgy vendors of male enhancement products willing to mix facts and fantasy in order to get their hands on the money of unsuspecting customers.

Let’s look at penis pumps and stretchers for instance. Some men think that both these types of products pumps are a scientifically backed penis enlargement solution they can safely use, but this is not entirely accurate. Penis pumps are not backed by health care professionals as a way of expanding penis length and girth. In fact, most of them will tell you to stay away from penis pumping because it’s not a safe technique.

The truth is that pumps are only approved as a means of obtaining an erection and they are recommended solely to men suffering from certain conditions and diseases that prevent them from achieving a normal erection. People suffering from diabetes or heart conditions lack a healthy blood flow which would allow the penis to fill blood and become erect. This is why they must resort to the suction provided by the pump in order to expand the penis chambers and draw blood in.

A lot of men wonder: “Do penis pumps work?” The simple answer is: “No, they don’t”. Moreover, it would be a mistake to call this procedure safe. The pressure caused by pumps can easily tear apart the cells that make up the penis tissue and lead to the formation of blood clots within the penis. The suction that forces blood toward the head of the penis may also cut off the blood flow if the pump is used for extended periods of time.

Another issue is the risk of malfunctioning or the results of the user’s mistake while using it. You have probably heard about men who placed the pump incorrectly on their penises and managed to get their testicles sucked into the pump. Every man can easily imagine the excruciating pain caused by such an accident.

This means that the penis pumps are not a viable alternative for long term penis enlargement, since the risks clearly outweigh the benefits. If you don’t want to deal with painful swellings, bruises, loss of feeling or the risk of impotence due to ruptured nerve cells, then you should simply avoid penis pumps. There are enough penis enlargement solutions to choose from anyway without you having to restrict yourself to hazards. The bottom line in penis pumps : not worth the risk.

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By *resh freddieMan
over a year ago

Penistone


"dunno but it sounds like ya blew ya balls up by mistake"

sorry got carried away there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

derrrrrrrrrrrrr

goes finds a cool spot and cogitates

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Blimey,Freddies on a googleathon

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you can get tablets for that ya know

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago


"you can get tablets for that ya know"

But do they make ya cock bigger?

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