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Give it all up and move to Thailand...

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By *iamondjoe OP   Man
over a year ago

Glastonbury

...ok. This is gonna be a slightly long-winded rant (it's Thurs, after all).

I have an extremely good friend of 17yrs. He's 56, gay, lives in London. Last year he unexpectedly came in to £180k and went on holiday (after taking me underwear shopping ).

So he goes to SE Asia & Oz to see some friends. Stops in Singapore, on his way to Malaysia, and picks up a 23yr old Filipino chap.

Goes to the Philippines, spends 2 weeks in heaven, meets the family, falls madly in love... whatever... goes to Oz.

So my friend got back last month and I saw 600-odd photos of the boyfriend. Whatever. He's sad to be back in grey old London after his lovely holiday.

Then he wanted to bring the bf over on a visa to live happily ever after. This is not possible although I've (pointlessly) helping him explore options.

For the last 2 days my friend is txt'ing me to say we (my family and him and his bf) should move to Thailand, buy an animal sanctuary for £120k and live over there.

Today he's said I could go and join them both - drop out of my life - for 6 weeks in Burma (which I do very much want to visit), in 1 month's time.

Am I just being cynical or is there no fool like an old fool?

I don't know what to say.

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

I don't know. I'd say if you can't follow your dreams at 56, when can you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm all for following your dreams .. If he has no ties here I say go for it

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

Crumpet Castle

Say yes.

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By *iamondjoe OP   Man
over a year ago

Glastonbury


"I don't know. I'd say if you can't follow your dreams at 56, when can you?"

Which is fine... but dragging me in to it?

I've already said no... he just tells me grandparents can do it, or drop out of school or take a sabbatical...

It's not so simple.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its a bit cliche, but you only have one life. This is it. Living with mistakes is easier than living with regrets.

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By *iamondjoe OP   Man
over a year ago

Glastonbury

I keep telling him to buy his council flat in Battersea with the cash as he'll get quite a discount...

He doesn't want to listen.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do a recce a long sabbatical one to get a feel for everything.

From experience living somewhere is completely different to travelling round it on a holiday. The daily grind is always a grind but can be made much better with the sun in the sky.

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By *iSTARessWoman
over a year ago

London

Sounds fabulous (for him) but sounds like you've already made up your mind.

At least you'll have a nice place to pop to for a holibob

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"I keep telling him to buy his council flat in Battersea with the cash as he'll get quite a discount...

He doesn't want to listen. "

That sounds sensible.

I'm sure you're the first to understand that sometimes people want to go a bit mad though.

You can carry on saying no to anything that doesn't work for you.

I hope he enjoys himself and has the time of his life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I keep telling him to buy his council flat in Battersea with the cash as he'll get quite a discount...

He doesn't want to listen. "

Advice is the easiest thing to give and the hardest thing to take. As for your original dilemma; was going to live overseas, something that was on your radar (and out of reach or sidelined goal), or is it something that, as it has presented itself, interests you, or are you just worried about missing an opportunity? If its the latter, then I would be cautious, if its the two former, then, what do you have to lose?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"...ok. This is gonna be a slightly long-winded rant (it's Thurs, after all).

I have an extremely good friend of 17yrs. He's 56, gay, lives in London. Last year he unexpectedly came in to £180k and went on holiday (after taking me underwear shopping ).

So he goes to SE Asia & Oz to see some friends. Stops in Singapore, on his way to Malaysia, and picks up a 23yr old Filipino chap.

Goes to the Philippines, spends 2 weeks in heaven, meets the family, falls madly in love... whatever... goes to Oz.

So my friend got back last month and I saw 600-odd photos of the boyfriend. Whatever. He's sad to be back in grey old London after his lovely holiday.

Then he wanted to bring the bf over on a visa to live happily ever after. This is not possible although I've (pointlessly) helping him explore options.

For the last 2 days my friend is txt'ing me to say we (my family and him and his bf) should move to Thailand, buy an animal sanctuary for £120k and live over there.

Today he's said I could go and join them both - drop out of my life - for 6 weeks in Burma (which I do very much want to visit), in 1 month's time.

Am I just being cynical or is there no fool like an old fool?

I don't know what to say.

"

Shut up and get naked you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have you talked it over with your other half ?.

Hate to say it but will the bf stick around if your friends ill /needs care or money runs out ?

He should buy his flat ,rent it out and travel.at least will have a safety net.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you should let me go instead.

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By *iamondjoe OP   Man
over a year ago

Glastonbury


"Shut up and get naked you "

What are you doing fucking about on here?!!!

Get your shit sorted and then come and sort out something for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What people should do and what they want to do rarely coincide. Usually I'd be in favor of a more sensible option. But when you're 56 and the money was unexpected I think why not just go for it?

That doesn't mean he shouldn't be a bit sensible in the plan moving forward, there are better and worse ways of being spontaneous. But I'd tell my friend to make a decision that he wouldn't regret, even if it's the not so sensible option.

Then I'd go along for 6 weeks and just help my friend enjoy it all.

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By *iamondjoe OP   Man
over a year ago

Glastonbury


"Have you talked it over with your other half ?.

Hate to say it but will the bf stick around if your friends ill /needs care or money runs out ?

He should buy his flat ,rent it out and travel.at least will have a safety net. "

She thinks it's madness

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

how long have you really got left at 56?

fck it man. go for it

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By *iverscuMan
over a year ago

Berkshire

At 56, you've got to follow your dreams.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"....

Am I just being cynical or is there no fool like an old fool?

I don't know what to say.

"

GO FOR IT & DONT LOOK BACK

some live to work, same old routine day in / day out, back to same brick walls, back to work / back to same brick walls (home)

go for it, and things are cheap out there, consider selling up and living the dream, who not have 10 good years living, rather than 10 20 bad years working

GO enjoy life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

sorry for predictive text above, but still go for it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Shut up and get naked you

What are you doing fucking about on here?!!!

Get your shit sorted and then come and sort out something for me.

"

Shush ( ain't I rude )

Sorting my problem then sorting yours.

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire


"Have you talked it over with your other half ?.

Hate to say it but will the bf stick around if your friends ill /needs care or money runs out ?

He should buy his flat ,rent it out and travel.at least will have a safety net. "

similar to this, he can go out for say 3 months then pop back and go again in the winter here for a bit longer..

should he get to the point where he decides to stay there and settle he will have the sale or rental of the flat to either pay for his accommodation or to rent out there..

you can always visit..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Life is to short for "what if's"

go for it, or regret not going for the rest of your life

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By *iamondjoe OP   Man
over a year ago

Glastonbury

You're all a bunch of loonies!

Lib, you can have him.

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