FabSwingers.com forum: Judging

By *iSTARess OP Woman
over a year ago

London

There have been a few threads recently where people have been judgmental or rude about the choices of others. 'My kink is ok but yours isn't' mentality.

As long as it's consensual and legal, what others get up to is none of your beeswax.

We're on a swingers site where the mainstream judge us as a bunch of deviants. Can we not have a little more acceptance and understanding among ourselves?

Thank you.

This plea has been brought to you by MiSTARess from the Party Party

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By *ittlemisssassypantsCouple
over a year ago

South East Wales

I quite literally couldn't care less what other people's kinks are that I'm not into. If I read about something I'm not keen on, I may wrinkle my nose and think to myself "oh no, not for me" but I wouldn't comment and condem them for having a fetish that I don't happen to share or understand.

If they aren't breaking the law and all are consenting, it really is none of my business. Nor is it anyone else's.

Sassy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But my opinion is so important?

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By *awandOrderCouple
over a year ago

SW London

"I quite literally couldn't care less what other people's kinks are that I'm not into. If I read about something I'm not keen on, I may wrinkle my nose and think to myself "oh no, not for me" but I wouldn't comment and condem them for having a fetish that I don't happen to share or understand.

If they aren't breaking the law and all are consenting, it really is none of my business. Nor is it anyone else's.

Sassy"

If I read something I am not keen on I think, hmmm, maybe there is something in it, I may try it .... why not, you only live once? Does that make me awful

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It always amazes me just how judgemental swingers can be considering the lifestyle.

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By *ittlemisssassypantsCouple
over a year ago

South East Wales

If they aren't breaking the law and all are consenting, it really is none of my business. Nor is it anyone else's.

Sassy

If I read something I am not keen on I think, hmmm, maybe there is something in it, I may try it .... why not, you only live once? Does that make me awful

Not at all! There were many things that I used to think we weird, gross, wrong etc that I know very much enjoy!

You never know what you may discover reading about other peoples kinks too

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"It always amazes me just how judgemental swingers can be considering the lifestyle. "

Sadly it doesn't amaze me any more. It did for a long time but I joined a different swinging community at a different time and was never like that. I will always be happy that I popped into it at absolutely the right time.

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By *c-ukMan
over a year ago

Sevenoaks

I would never judge anyone for their kinks or their status...

Didn't some bearded chap say something about he who casts the first stone..

Very topical at Easter, did u see what I did there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It no longer amazes us at all .

Infact we have come to expect it now and perhaps we deserve it . I don't know , but we certainly don't judge anyone else for their choices and kinks .

The saying which often pops up into threads ' each to their own ' , doesn't seem to apply to everyone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We're all judgemental to some extent but there's plenty folks on here who would do better keeping their judgements to themselves I reckon.

I hate to quote the bible but......"Judge not,lest ye be judged"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We all judge to an extent. Thats just human nature. When thoughts are invited fine post an opinion. But theres one or two that grind my gears by posting again and again saying the same thing.

Im talking like 25 to 35 posts just arguing with anyone who has a different view point from them. And half the time the post wasnt even asking for ducking opnions...

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

Swingers for all their notoriety and attitude are a strait laced vanilla bunch on the whole. Once you get past a possible bit of exhibitionism, oral and perhaps anal, the shutters start going up. Many swingers attitudes reflect society as a whole even though they sit under "we are swingers aren't we liberated" umbrella

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

Some think their opinion is the ultimate final word and once they've given it, all discussion should cease. That's if they even permit discussion because, y'know, discussion of posts on a public discussion board should definitely need to be sanctioned by random board members.

I don't give a shit what people do as long as it's between adults and is legal and consensual.

I do think some on here should show more respect to others in general. Whether it's a right to have their preferences respected, a right to say no, or whatever, a lot of people seem to think they are excluded.

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"Swingers for all their notoriety and attitude are a strait laced vanilla bunch on the whole. Once you get past a possible bit of exhibitionism, oral and perhaps anal, the shutters start going up. Many swingers attitudes reflect society as a whole even though they sit under "we are swingers aren't we liberated" umbrella "

I agree. Promiscuous, possibly but open-minded, not usually.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it could be related to projecting guilt and shame onto others?

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

"I think it could be related to projecting guilt and shame onto others?"

I certainly agree with this.

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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago

Filthy Fuckeryville

It's not just about people's tastes sexually, I got abuse the other day for being married and meeting too many people!?

Oddly the idiot giving the shit apparently only has one verification - from a married lady also!?

I don't judge like that and expect the same back - if I see something that's not to my taste I just pass by - if I'm asked for an opinion I'll give an honest one, but it's not cause I think it's right, it's just my opinion.....

(kicks soapbox away).

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By *enard ArgenteMan
over a year ago

London and France

I agree. Promiscuous, possibly but open-minded, not usually."

Yes, I am fascinated by how "conventional" the majority of so called swingers are;

And how little imagination they have: I have far more interesting encounters with people who don't label themselves as "swingers".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I see exactly what the OP means, there was a thread last week we're some tv/ts was getting shut because he was a single but talking about his GF.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There have been a few threads recently where people have been judgmental or rude about the choices of others. 'My kink is ok but yours isn't' mentality.

As long as it's consensual and legal, what others get up to is none of your beeswax.

We're on a swingers site where the mainstream judge us as a bunch of deviants. Can we not have a little more acceptance and understanding among ourselves?

Thank you.

This plea has been brought to you by MiSTARess from the Party Party"

Well said. Totally agree. As you say, some people's kinks and fetishes are stranger, or should I say, more unusual than others. Doesn't make them wrong.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It always amazes me just how judgemental swingers can be considering the lifestyle. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are not here to judge one another.

Just enjoy the site and have fun .

When you judge some some it says more about you than others

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There have been a few threads recently where people have been judgmental or rude about the choices of others. 'My kink is ok but yours isn't' mentality.

As long as it's consensual and legal, what others get up to is none of your beeswax.

We're on a swingers site where the mainstream judge us as a bunch of deviants. Can we not have a little more acceptance and understanding among ourselves?

Thank you.

This plea has been brought to you by MiSTARess from the Party Party"
hehe this is a forum in case you hadn't noticed and when you disagree with something you don't hold back ,yes we are adults and yes if its consensual between the people concerned its up to them ,if put up for debate though some options will be less accepted than others we all have different opinions

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What others on here do is no business of mine.

If you post about it in a public forum then surely you know there will be For & Against comments. Within those there will be people that come across judgemental & depending on who they are some will jump on the bandwagon.

No one has the right to be mean to anyone when replying but it's inevitable some will.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do not mind how people react to my opinions as long as it is not a personal attack. Disagreements are part of life but when someone who you have never met gets abusive it just makes me move on from the thread.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't often post what I do in a public-ish forum.

When I do I expect it may be read by people with a different opinion to me who may also make comments about their opinions, experience and thoughts.

I expect I've put many people off me with some of the things I say.

I think people do judge, have a right to their opinion and should never feel that they can only comment if they agree with the thread.

I also feel that some people need to learn some common decency, respect and tolerance for others.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What others on here do is no business of mine.

No one has the right to be mean to anyone when replying but it's inevitable some will."

I agree with this , and differences of opinion on a forum thread are fine . That's what makes things interesting .

Private messages are a different story though .....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 29/03/16 07:57:36]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"in fact you blocked me for my opinion so theirs an example in question of how judgemental you are "

Not saying this is the case here, but I've blocked others, not for their opinion, but how they state their opinion. And for their tedious annoying use of emojis.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"in fact you blocked me for my opinion so theirs an example in question of how judgemental you are

Not saying this is the case here, but I've blocked others, not for their opinion, but how they state their opinion. And for their tedious annoying use of emojis. "
hehe but guys blocking me have no effect and many like my humour and emojees, so once again its just an opinion and they are not there to annoy they only annoy those who are easily annoyed ,an opinion is just that in life if you met most of these people you would like them and that all important opinion that is so objectionable would probably never be mentioned ,its so easy to comment on something here and for people to judge you and if certain people object to that opinion others follow in their wake especially if its a woman

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By *ampara2Woman
over a year ago

biggleswade

"There have been a few threads recently where people have been judgmental or rude about the choices of others. 'My kink is ok but yours isn't' mentality.

As long as it's consensual and legal, what others get up to is none of your beeswax.

We're on a swingers site where the mainstream judge us as a bunch of deviants. Can we not have a little more acceptance and understanding among ourselves?

Thank you.

This plea has been brought to you by MiSTARess from the Party Party hehe this is a forum in case you hadn't noticed and when you disagree with something you don't hold back ,yes we are adults and yes if its consensual between the people concerned its up to them ,if put up for debate though some options will be less accepted than others we all have different opinions

"
this forum thing is strange as if someone has the gaul to disagree with someone they are called trolls,people have different ideas and thoughts but that is life and human nature,for me i like a little well informed argument especially when my view is better than theirs

ps only joking here

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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago

Filthy Fuckeryville

"I don't often post what I do in a public-ish forum.

When I do I expect it may be read by people with a different opinion to me who may also make comments about their opinions, experience and thoughts.

I expect I've put many people off me with some of the things I say.

I think people do judge, have a right to their opinion and should never feel that they can only comment if they agree with the thread.

I also feel that some people need to learn some common decency, respect and tolerance for others. "

Difference of opinion is one thing, but getting crap from others for your opinions differing is something else.

It's the difference between a discussion and an argument....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What others on here do is no business of mine.

No one has the right to be mean to anyone when replying but it's inevitable some will.

I agree with this , and differences of opinion on a forum thread are fine . That's what makes things interesting .

Private messages are a different story though .....

Yeah I've had a few of those & then blocked before I can retort!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There have been a few threads recently where people have been judgmental or rude about the choices of others. 'My kink is ok but yours isn't' mentality.

As long as it's consensual and legal, what others get up to is none of your beeswax.

We're on a swingers site where the mainstream judge us as a bunch of deviants. Can we not have a little more acceptance and understanding among ourselves?

Thank you.

this forum thing is strange as if someone has the gaul to disagree with someone they are called trolls,people have different ideas and thoughts but that is life and human nature,for me i like a little well informed argument especially when my view is better than theirs

ps only joking here

"
this is the object of a forum to highlight the different ways people think about things ,some post comment without engaging the brain and those type of threads end badly ,in life I'm a gentleman but if I disagree with something I'm not afraid to say it but in a mannerable fashion its all about manners and tolerance ,also some things we write can be ambiguous and acted upon to quickly

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"I don't often post what I do in a public-ish forum.

When I do I expect it may be read by people with a different opinion to me who may also make comments about their opinions, experience and thoughts.

I expect I've put many people off me with some of the things I say.

I think people do judge, have a right to their opinion and should never feel that they can only comment if they agree with the thread.

I also feel that some people need to learn some common decency, respect and tolerance for others.

Difference of opinion is one thing, but getting crap from others for your opinions differing is something else.

It's the difference between a discussion and an argument.... "

No, the difference between a discussion and an argument, often, is whether you agree or disagree with someone.

If you disagree, you are discussing but if you disagree you are "trying to start an argument".

Some people really cannot cope, at all, with anyone disagreeing with them. And if they continue to disagree after it's been explained to them...well, that's absolutely unacceptable!

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

Adding insults is not discussion, it is abuse

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yea totally agree,id say most are very straight laced

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We all judge to an extent. Thats just human nature. When thoughts are invited fine post an opinion. But theres one or two that grind my gears by posting again and again saying the same thing.

Im talking like 25 to 35 posts just arguing with anyone who has a different view point from them. And half the time the post wasnt even asking for ducking opnions...

Here fucking here!!!!

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"Adding insults is not discussion, it is abuse"

Since insults are against the rules, report the posts.

Some people take anyone disagreeing as an insult though.

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

yea totally agree,id say most are very straight laced"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There have been a few threads recently where people have been judgmental or rude about the choices of others. 'My kink is ok but yours isn't' mentality.

As long as it's consensual and legal, what others get up to is none of your beeswax.

We're on a swingers site where the mainstream judge us as a bunch of deviants. Can we not have a little more acceptance and understanding among ourselves?

Thank you.

This plea has been brought to you by MiSTARess from the Party Party"

Nail head on hit.

I was astounded at the apparent narrow minds of some on what I thought would be an open minded arena.

Of course we meet narrow minded people all the time, why would Fab be any different really?

Everyone to their own I say. Don't bother me, I won't bother you. Fixed.....

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By *etter the devil you knowWoman
over a year ago

Lyndhurst

I judge people all the time, so what.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I judge people all the time, so what.

We all do but its not fashionable to admit it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The thing about it for me is it's not a case of 'what you do', 'it's the way that you do it'. A difference of opinion can be come judgemental when it becomes a personal attack or overly critical at a personal level. The choice of words and how things are said makes a world of difference to me. Making judgements and being judgemental are different in my book.

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By *etter the devil you knowWoman
over a year ago

Lyndhurst

"I judge people all the time, so what.

We all do but its not fashionable to admit it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The thing about it for me is it's not a case of 'what you do', 'it's the way that you do it'. A difference of opinion can be come judgemental when it becomes a personal attack or overly critical at a personal level. The choice of words and how things are said makes a world of difference to me. Making judgements and being judgemental are different in my book."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People made judgement on my marmite easter egg. I've been sulking eversince

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We all judge to an extent. Thats just human nature. When thoughts are invited fine post an opinion. But theres one or two that grind my gears by posting again and again saying the same thing.

Im talking like 25 to 35 posts just arguing with anyone who has a different view point from them. And half the time the post wasnt even asking for ducking opnions...

I think it's ironic that the worst culprits contribute to threads like this, oblivious to what they're writing in relation to their posts in other threads.

When the biggest culprit makes their posts make them sound like the most open minded, care free, laid back person in the world, and exactly the opposite is true.

How dare anyone not accept my opinion as a god like proclamation of what is right.

How dare anyone have a different opinion to me. It's right because I said it.

We've all seen people like this.

It's ignorant.

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"We all judge to an extent. Thats just human nature. When thoughts are invited fine post an opinion. But theres one or two that grind my gears by posting again and again saying the same thing.

Im talking like 25 to 35 posts just arguing with anyone who has a different view point from them. And half the time the post wasnt even asking for ducking opnions...

I think it's ironic that the worst culprits contribute to threads like this, oblivious to what they're writing in relation to their posts in other threads.

When the biggest culprit makes their posts make them sound like the most open minded, care free, laid back person in the world, and exactly the opposite is true.

How dare anyone not accept my opinion as a god like proclamation of what is right.

How dare anyone have a different opinion to me. It's right because I said it.

We've all seen people like this.

It's ignorant."

Absolutely, the how dare anyone have a different opinion types are very annoying.

It's even more annoying when they carry on posting to a discussion and then complain when others respond, and accuse them of arguing! Because obviously they are right and their word should be the final one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We all judge to an extent. Thats just human nature. When thoughts are invited fine post an opinion. But theres one or two that grind my gears by posting again and again saying the same thing.

Im talking like 25 to 35 posts just arguing with anyone who has a different view point from them. And half the time the post wasnt even asking for ducking opnions...

I think it's ironic that the worst culprits contribute to threads like this, oblivious to what they're writing in relation to their posts in other threads.

When the biggest culprit makes their posts make them sound like the most open minded, care free, laid back person in the world, and exactly the opposite is true.

How dare anyone not accept my opinion as a god like proclamation of what is right.

How dare anyone have a different opinion to me. It's right because I said it.

We've all seen people like this.

It's ignorant.

Absolutely, the how dare anyone have a different opinion types are very annoying.

There's a lot of that on here....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We all judge to an extent. Thats just human nature. When thoughts are invited fine post an opinion. But theres one or two that grind my gears by posting again and again saying the same thing.

Im talking like 25 to 35 posts just arguing with anyone who has a different view point from them. And half the time the post wasnt even asking for ducking opnions...

I think it's ironic that the worst culprits contribute to threads like this, oblivious to what they're writing in relation to their posts in other threads.

When the biggest culprit makes their posts make them sound like the most open minded, care free, laid back person in the world, and exactly the opposite is true.

How dare anyone not accept my opinion as a god like proclamation of what is right.

How dare anyone have a different opinion to me. It's right because I said it.

We've all seen people like this.

It's ignorant."

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"We all judge to an extent. Thats just human nature. When thoughts are invited fine post an opinion. But theres one or two that grind my gears by posting again and again saying the same thing.

Im talking like 25 to 35 posts just arguing with anyone who has a different view point from them. And half the time the post wasnt even asking for ducking opnions...

I think it's ironic that the worst culprits contribute to threads like this, oblivious to what they're writing in relation to their posts in other threads.

When the biggest culprit makes their posts make them sound like the most open minded, care free, laid back person in the world, and exactly the opposite is true.

How dare anyone not accept my opinion as a god like proclamation of what is right.

How dare anyone have a different opinion to me. It's right because I said it.

We've all seen people like this.

It's ignorant.

Absolutely, the how dare anyone have a different opinion types are very annoying.

There's a lot of that on here...."

And some people know that as long as people post within the rules, whether or not anyone else agrees, they are entitled to do so.

They realise that if you keep responding to someone, then it's not particularly surprising if they reply back.

I see a lot of people moaning about people "arguing" but keeping the discussion going by replying!

I've heard 5 years olds cry,"Muuuummmm, she's arguing with me" but adults should be past that stage.

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

It's funny when those accusing others of lack of self-awareness are actually the ones without any

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's funny when those accusing others of lack of self-awareness are actually the ones without any

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's funny when those accusing others of lack of self-awareness are actually the ones without any

Oh the irony...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We all judge to an extent. Thats just human nature. When thoughts are invited fine post an opinion. But theres one or two that grind my gears by posting again and again saying the same thing.

Im talking like 25 to 35 posts just arguing with anyone who has a different view point from them. And half the time the post wasnt even asking for ducking opnions...

I think it's ironic that the worst culprits contribute to threads like this, oblivious to what they're writing in relation to their posts in other threads.

When the biggest culprit makes their posts make them sound like the most open minded, care free, laid back person in the world, and exactly the opposite is true.

How dare anyone not accept my opinion as a god like proclamation of what is right.

How dare anyone have a different opinion to me. It's right because I said it.

We've all seen people like this.

It's ignorant.

Absolutely, the how dare anyone have a different opinion types are very annoying.

There's a lot of that on here....

And some people know that as long as people post within the rules, whether or not anyone else agrees, they are entitled to do so.

They realise that if you keep responding to someone, then it's not particularly surprising if they reply back.

I see a lot of people moaning about people "arguing" but keeping the discussion going by replying!

I've heard 5 years olds cry,"Muuuummmm, she's arguing with me" but adults should be past that stage."

Some people need to understand the difference between discussion with others and dictating to others.

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"It's funny when those accusing others of lack of self-awareness are actually the ones without any

Oh the irony..."

Absolutely.

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"We all judge to an extent. Thats just human nature. When thoughts are invited fine post an opinion. But theres one or two that grind my gears by posting again and again saying the same thing.

Im talking like 25 to 35 posts just arguing with anyone who has a different view point from them. And half the time the post wasnt even asking for ducking opnions...

I think it's ironic that the worst culprits contribute to threads like this, oblivious to what they're writing in relation to their posts in other threads.

When the biggest culprit makes their posts make them sound like the most open minded, care free, laid back person in the world, and exactly the opposite is true.

How dare anyone not accept my opinion as a god like proclamation of what is right.

How dare anyone have a different opinion to me. It's right because I said it.

We've all seen people like this.

It's ignorant.

Absolutely, the how dare anyone have a different opinion types are very annoying.

There's a lot of that on here....

And some people know that as long as people post within the rules, whether or not anyone else agrees, they are entitled to do so.

They realise that if you keep responding to someone, then it's not particularly surprising if they reply back.

I see a lot of people moaning about people "arguing" but keeping the discussion going by replying!

I've heard 5 years olds cry,"Muuuummmm, she's arguing with me" but adults should be past that stage.

Some people need to understand the difference between discussion with others and dictating to others."

Yes, I completely agree.

And some need to realise if they keep a discussion going by quoting people and replying to them, people will respond.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There have been a few threads recently where people have been judgmental or rude about the choices of others. 'My kink is ok but yours isn't' mentality.

As long as it's consensual and legal, what others get up to is none of your beeswax.

We're on a swingers site where the mainstream judge us as a bunch of deviants. Can we not have a little more acceptance and understanding among ourselves?

Thank you.

This plea has been brought to you by MiSTARess from the Party Party"

Perfectly said and on point as usual .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It always amazes me just how judgemental swingers can be considering the lifestyle. "

I've said that before....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We all judge to an extent. Thats just human nature. When thoughts are invited fine post an opinion. But theres one or two that grind my gears by posting again and again saying the same thing.

Im talking like 25 to 35 posts just arguing with anyone who has a different view point from them. And half the time the post wasnt even asking for ducking opnions...

I think it's ironic that the worst culprits contribute to threads like this, oblivious to what they're writing in relation to their posts in other threads.

When the biggest culprit makes their posts make them sound like the most open minded, care free, laid back person in the world, and exactly the opposite is true.

How dare anyone not accept my opinion as a god like proclamation of what is right.

How dare anyone have a different opinion to me. It's right because I said it.

We've all seen people like this.

It's ignorant.

Absolutely, the how dare anyone have a different opinion types are very annoying.

There's a lot of that on here....

And some people know that as long as people post within the rules, whether or not anyone else agrees, they are entitled to do so.

They realise that if you keep responding to someone, then it's not particularly surprising if they reply back.

I see a lot of people moaning about people "arguing" but keeping the discussion going by replying!

I've heard 5 years olds cry,"Muuuummmm, she's arguing with me" but adults should be past that stage.

Some people need to understand the difference between discussion with others and dictating to others.

Yes, I completely agree.

And some need to realise if they keep a discussion going by quoting people and replying to them, people will respond."

Like you just did?

And so did I of course.....

Where will it end????????

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

It'll end very, very soon if we can't play nice.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I openly admit that I am judgemental.

I don't accept the viewpoint that as swingers we should be tolerant of any kink. Some things we will find distasteful. I can't understand the Bdsm scene, cannot possibly see what anyone gets out of punishing others or allowing it upon yourself. But there are so many that do understand it and enjoy it.

Instead of trying to preach acceptance of all kinks, accept all people will make a judgement on what you say and do and learn to be indifferent to it if it's right for you.

You could put up a married men, bareback, bbw thread alongside this one and it would be full of people claiming it was wrong. People are just passionate about different things.

And let's face it, if this forum was full of love and agreement and solidarity 24/7 what a boring place it would be.

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *etter the devil you knowWoman
over a year ago

Lyndhurst

"I openly admit that I am judgemental.

Instead of trying to preach acceptance of all kinks, accept all people will make a judgement on what you say and do and learn to be indifferent to it if it's right for you.

You could put up a married men, bareback, bbw thread alongside this one and it would be full of people claiming it was wrong. People are just passionate about different things.

And let's face it, if this forum was full of love and agreement and solidarity 24/7 what a boring place it would be.

(thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When we first joined I confess to seeing man on man as being totally revolting . 49 years of my life had been spent with other people who felt the same way . I guess I was homophobic .

After a few months of swinging I no longer felt that way at all , and now I actually find it rather erotic and horny to watch !

Water sports seemed so wrong , now it's hot .

Dogging was for dirty skanks , now we love it and we've met some of the loveliest people while out dogging .

Old men were lecherous and wrong , now in certain scenarios a welcome addition to the fun .

Large women were gross , now they're often as hot as fuck .

Skinny women should have gotten a decent meal inside them , now they can have us inside them .

And so the list goes on ......

We have found our journey has opened our minds and we are definately no longer judgemental .

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

"It'll end very, very soon if we can't play nice.

Fight

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"I openly admit that I am judgemental.

Instead of trying to preach acceptance of all kinks, accept all people will make a judgement on what you say and do and learn to be indifferent to it if it's right for you.

You could put up a married men, bareback, bbw thread alongside this one and it would be full of people claiming it was wrong. People are just passionate about different things.

And let's face it, if this forum was full of love and agreement and solidarity 24/7 what a boring place it would be.

You may not understand BDSM but I don't recall you being intolerant of it. If asked, I'm sure you've said you don't understand it but I doubt you've felt the need to denounce anyone that enjoys it as a disgusting pervert, or similar.

There's a difference between judging and deciding something isn't for you and judging and being insulting to those who enjoy it.

I don't expect anyone to be positive about any and all kinks, whether they are swingers or not

I think the point being made is that even if something isn't for us, there's no need to insult anyone about it. As swingers, into things which many others would consider disgusting, we should know not to do the same to each other?

We don't have to understand or like what anyone else does. If asked, I don't see a problem with saying it's not your thing and you don't understand it. That's different to judging the people that do it and being unpleasant though.

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"When we first joined I confess to seeing man on man as being totally revolting . 49 years of my life had been spent with other people who felt the same way . I guess I was homophobic .

After a few months of swinging I no longer felt that way at all , and now I actually find it rather erotic and horny to watch !

Water sports seemed so wrong , now it's hot .

Dogging was for dirty skanks , now we love it and we've met some of the loveliest people while out dogging .

Old men were lecherous and wrong , now in certain scenarios a welcome addition to the fun .

Large women were gross , now they're often as hot as fuck .

Skinny women should have gotten a decent meal inside them , now they can have us inside them .

And so the list goes on ......

We have found our journey has opened our minds and we are definately no longer judgemental .

Some of my opinions have changed too.

I'd been part of the kink world for a long time before joining here, so my opinions might not have been affected to the extent yours have, but this site has definitely given me a different perspective on some people.

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

The only two things we've found people give us grief for in a judgemental way are our no kissing rule and the shape, size and amount of my pubic hair and that's only in the forum. It makes me smile that there's so much else that could be said but those two very small things cause outrage.

I don't care one jot or tittle although I will put my two penn'orth in if I feel like it.

The problem I feel with accusing others of being judgemental is that in order to make that claim you will have had to be judgemental yourself.

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

"The only two things we've found people give us grief for in a judgemental way are our no kissing rule and the shape, size and amount of my pubic hair and that's only in the forum. It makes me smile that there's so much else that could be said but those two very small things cause outrage.

I don't care one jot or tittle although I will put my two penn'orth in if I feel like it.

The problem I feel with accusing others of being judgemental is that in order to make that claim you will have had to be judgemental yourself.

"
can I kiss your muff!

(thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't care one jot or tittle although I will put my two penn'orth in if I feel like it.

The problem I feel with accusing others of being judgemental is that in order to make that claim you will have had to be judgemental yourself.

can I kiss your muff!

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

I don't care one jot or tittle although I will put my two penn'orth in if I feel like it.

The problem I feel with accusing others of being judgemental is that in order to make that claim you will have had to be judgemental yourself.

can I kiss your muff!

The answer to that surely has to be Yes, furry muff. (see what I did there?

)

(thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I openly admit that I am judgemental.

Instead of trying to preach acceptance of all kinks, accept all people will make a judgement on what you say and do and learn to be indifferent to it if it's right for you.

You could put up a married men, bareback, bbw thread alongside this one and it would be full of people claiming it was wrong. People are just passionate about different things.

And let's face it, if this forum was full of love and agreement and solidarity 24/7 what a boring place it would be.

There's a difference between judging and deciding something isn't for you and judging and being insulting to those who enjoy it.

I don't expect anyone to be positive about any and all kinks, whether they are swingers or not

I agree Dee. Regardless of what is practised, it is wrong to be rude and abuse people because of it. people should always try to be assertive when debating, communicate in a way which doesn't belittle either party.

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I don't care one jot or tittle although I will put my two penn'orth in if I feel like it.

The problem I feel with accusing others of being judgemental is that in order to make that claim you will have had to be judgemental yourself.

can I kiss your muff!

Ya filthy swine, how dare you!

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"I openly admit that I am judgemental.

Instead of trying to preach acceptance of all kinks, accept all people will make a judgement on what you say and do and learn to be indifferent to it if it's right for you.

You could put up a married men, bareback, bbw thread alongside this one and it would be full of people claiming it was wrong. People are just passionate about different things.

And let's face it, if this forum was full of love and agreement and solidarity 24/7 what a boring place it would be.

There's a difference between judging and deciding something isn't for you and judging and being insulting to those who enjoy it.

I don't expect anyone to be positive about any and all kinks, whether they are swingers or not

What if people have a fetish for belittling though? We have to respect their fetish and not belittle them about it, right?

I'm confused now.

(thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We all judge to an extent. Thats just human nature. When thoughts are invited fine post an opinion. But theres one or two that grind my gears by posting again and again saying the same thing.

Im talking like 25 to 35 posts just arguing with anyone who has a different view point from them. And half the time the post wasnt even asking for ducking opnions...

I think it's ironic that the worst culprits contribute to threads like this, oblivious to what they're writing in relation to their posts in other threads.

When the biggest culprit makes their posts make them sound like the most open minded, care free, laid back person in the world, and exactly the opposite is true.

How dare anyone not accept my opinion as a god like proclamation of what is right.

How dare anyone have a different opinion to me. It's right because I said it.

We've all seen people like this.

It's ignorant."

I was thinking that myself. I've seen so many single men shot down by the "ladies" on the forums,because of terminology or what they like to do with women. Those same ladies don't come across as women who treat men as equals,unless they fancy them.

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Sexism?

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *ust Ms LovinWoman
over a year ago

birmingham

Swinging isn't as black and white as people think it is and those that do are in the wrong game

Each single lady , single man and couples get something different out of swinging

There will always be people that will judge as we all have at some people in our life's its human nature

Those that judge and voice well they are people that aren't woth our time

Happy swinging peeps in whatever way suits you

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

"We all judge to an extent. Thats just human nature. When thoughts are invited fine post an opinion. But theres one or two that grind my gears by posting again and again saying the same thing.

Im talking like 25 to 35 posts just arguing with anyone who has a different view point from them. And half the time the post wasnt even asking for ducking opnions...

I think it's ironic that the worst culprits contribute to threads like this, oblivious to what they're writing in relation to their posts in other threads.

When the biggest culprit makes their posts make them sound like the most open minded, care free, laid back person in the world, and exactly the opposite is true.

How dare anyone not accept my opinion as a god like proclamation of what is right.

How dare anyone have a different opinion to me. It's right because I said it.

We've all seen people like this.

It's ignorant.

I have to agree with you there...it's cringe worthy to watch but over the years I've learnt to keep my mouth shut on certain topics...

(thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

kinks are a bit like religion to me - every body can have what they like so long as they dont try an push anything onto me i dont want to be involved with - keep safe people x

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I don't care one jot or tittle although I will put my two penn'orth in if I feel like it.

The problem I feel with accusing others of being judgemental is that in order to make that claim you will have had to be judgemental yourself.

can I kiss your muff!

The answer to that surely has to be Yes, furry muff. (see what I did there?

(thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's not just about people's tastes sexually, I got abuse the other day for being married and meeting too many people!?

Oddly the idiot giving the shit apparently only has one verification - from a married lady also!?

(kicks soapbox away)."

Let it go woman for fuck sake

She isn't married either

(thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We all judge to an extent. Thats just human nature. When thoughts are invited fine post an opinion. But theres one or two that grind my gears by posting again and again saying the same thing.

Im talking like 25 to 35 posts just arguing with anyone who has a different view point from them. And half the time the post wasnt even asking for ducking opnions...

I think it's ironic that the worst culprits contribute to threads like this, oblivious to what they're writing in relation to their posts in other threads.

When the biggest culprit makes their posts make them sound like the most open minded, care free, laid back person in the world, and exactly the opposite is true.

How dare anyone not accept my opinion as a god like proclamation of what is right.

How dare anyone have a different opinion to me. It's right because I said it.

We've all seen people like this.

It's ignorant.

I have to agree with you there...it's cringe worthy to watch but over the years I've learnt to keep my mouth shut on certain topics..."

Maybe call me a White Knightess but I like to let the men know we aren't all like that. The offenders aren't judging as such they are attacking in a passively aggressive way that won't get them a ban. I think it's sad that people can't talk about their kinks,fetishes and fantasies without being abused for it.

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"We all judge to an extent. Thats just human nature. When thoughts are invited fine post an opinion. But theres one or two that grind my gears by posting again and again saying the same thing.

Im talking like 25 to 35 posts just arguing with anyone who has a different view point from them. And half the time the post wasnt even asking for ducking opnions...

I think it's ironic that the worst culprits contribute to threads like this, oblivious to what they're writing in relation to their posts in other threads.

When the biggest culprit makes their posts make them sound like the most open minded, care free, laid back person in the world, and exactly the opposite is true.

How dare anyone not accept my opinion as a god like proclamation of what is right.

How dare anyone have a different opinion to me. It's right because I said it.

We've all seen people like this.

It's ignorant.

I have to agree with you there...it's cringe worthy to watch but over the years I've learnt to keep my mouth shut on certain topics...

Whilst I see what you mean, sometimes the kinks and fantasies are expressed in really unpleasant ways. It's not always the fetish or fantasy that some find objectionable but how it's expressed.

Anyone posting, for example, as if they view someone as piece of meat is likely to get backs up.

It is possible to post about fetishes and fantasies and still show respect for people.

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago

Filthy Fuckeryville

"It's not just about people's tastes sexually, I got abuse the other day for being married and meeting too many people!?

Oddly the idiot giving the shit apparently only has one verification - from a married lady also!?

(kicks soapbox away).

Let it go woman for fuck sake

She isn't married either

It's you carrying it on here?! I'm simply cobtriributing to the discussion

I was told she was married - I wouldn't know as I blocked you for your opinionated crap that you simply didn't need to voice at me - interested to know though what made you launch at me?

(thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's not just about people's tastes sexually, I got abuse the other day for being married and meeting too many people!?

Oddly the idiot giving the shit apparently only has one verification - from a married lady also!?

(kicks soapbox away).

Let it go woman for fuck sake

She isn't married either

It's you carrying it on here?! I'm simply cobtriributing to the discussion

I was told she was married - I wouldn't know as I blocked you for your opinionated crap that you simply didn't need to voice at me - interested to know though what made you launch at me?

I'd just like to point out I'm not married.. perhaps my posts on here made it seem that way but I just thought I'd clear that up

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *ancs MinxWoman
over a year ago

Burnley

"We all judge to an extent. Thats just human nature. When thoughts are invited fine post an opinion. But theres one or two that grind my gears by posting again and again saying the same thing.

Im talking like 25 to 35 posts just arguing with anyone who has a different view point from them. And half the time the post wasnt even asking for ducking opnions...

I think it's ironic that the worst culprits contribute to threads like this, oblivious to what they're writing in relation to their posts in other threads.

When the biggest culprit makes their posts make them sound like the most open minded, care free, laid back person in the world, and exactly the opposite is true.

How dare anyone not accept my opinion as a god like proclamation of what is right.

How dare anyone have a different opinion to me. It's right because I said it.

We've all seen people like this.

It's ignorant.

I have to agree with you there...it's cringe worthy to watch but over the years I've learnt to keep my mouth shut on certain topics...

Whilst I see what you mean, sometimes the kinks and fantasies are expressed in really unpleasant ways. It's not always the fetish or fantasy that some find objectionable but how it's expressed.

Anyone posting, for example, as if they view someone as piece of meat is likely to get backs up.

It is possible to post about fetishes and fantasies and still show respect for people."

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *ny1localMan
over a year ago

READING

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Responding to thread topics with personal digs, sly remarks and/or bickering is really not on. I'm sorry if I wasn't clear with my earlier post but please quit it.

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago

Filthy Fuckeryville

"It's not just about people's tastes sexually, I got abuse the other day for being married and meeting too many people!?

Oddly the idiot giving the shit apparently only has one verification - from a married lady also!?

(kicks soapbox away).

Let it go woman for fuck sake

She isn't married either

It's you carrying it on here?! I'm simply cobtriributing to the discussion

I was told she was married - I wouldn't know as I blocked you for your opinionated crap that you simply didn't need to voice at me - interested to know though what made you launch at me?

I'd just like to point out I'm not married.. perhaps my posts on here made it seem that way but I just thought I'd clear that up

I have no idea lovely, having looked at your profile it's 'someone' you met who gave me shit for being married in the forum the other day when it us NOTHING to do with him.

Several then jumped to my defence citing his verification as being from an attached lady - I wouldn't know in all honesty as I'd already blocked him.

My point was simply that it's another form of abuse. I am an adult and I make my choices, it's not down to anyone else.

The fact the matter was deleted from the forum and when he carried on the thread closed should have told him he was wrong and not to try and contact me again as he has above.

(thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's not just about people's tastes sexually, I got abuse the other day for being married and meeting too many people!?

Oddly the idiot giving the shit apparently only has one verification - from a married lady also!?

(kicks soapbox away).

Let it go woman for fuck sake

She isn't married either

It's you carrying it on here?! I'm simply cobtriributing to the discussion

I was told she was married - I wouldn't know as I blocked you for your opinionated crap that you simply didn't need to voice at me - interested to know though what made you launch at me?

I'd just like to point out I'm not married.. perhaps my posts on here made it seem that way but I just thought I'd clear that up

I have no idea lovely, having looked at your profile it's 'someone' you met who gave me shit for being married in the forum the other day when it us NOTHING to do with him.

Several then jumped to my defence citing his verification as being from an attached lady - I wouldn't know in all honesty as I'd already blocked him.

My point was simply that it's another form of abuse. I am an adult and I make my choices, it's not down to anyone else.

The fact the matter was deleted from the forum and when he carried on the thread closed should have told him he was wrong and not to try and contact me again as he has above.

I don't know I was off on a break from fab at the time. Maybe the conversation should be left alone if it caused upset. Which in all fairness, you did mention it first. I wasn't there so I can't comment and I'm not looking to argue with you either. Sometimes things can be taken the wrong way on here I think its best agreeing to disagree and move on life's too short.

(thread closed by moderator)

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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago

Filthy Fuckeryville

"It's not just about people's tastes sexually, I got abuse the other day for being married and meeting too many people!?

Oddly the idiot giving the shit apparently only has one verification - from a married lady also!?

(kicks soapbox away).

Let it go woman for fuck sake

She isn't married either

It's you carrying it on here?! I'm simply cobtriributing to the discussion

I was told she was married - I wouldn't know as I blocked you for your opinionated crap that you simply didn't need to voice at me - interested to know though what made you launch at me?

I'd just like to point out I'm not married.. perhaps my posts on here made it seem that way but I just thought I'd clear that up

I have no idea lovely, having looked at your profile it's 'someone' you met who gave me shit for being married in the forum the other day when it us NOTHING to do with him.

Several then jumped to my defence citing his verification as being from an attached lady - I wouldn't know in all honesty as I'd already blocked him.

My point was simply that it's another form of abuse. I am an adult and I make my choices, it's not down to anyone else.

The fact the matter was deleted from the forum and when he carried on the thread closed should have told him he was wrong and not to try and contact me again as he has above.

I'm also not looking to argue, but cited it as it is current to the topic - I didn't however mention him etc

(thread closed by moderator)

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