FabSwingers.com forum: Bullies in the forums

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Heres one for you are there bullies/cliques in the forums or just difference of opinions. We have all been slated at one point or another for posting a thread. There is great banter in the forums but when does it turn into bullying. Your thoughts please.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

usually when a group of posters start attacking the OP or one of the other members that posted cause they didn't agree with their comments, then it usually turns into a personal attack about their profile

very sad and something I'm sure wouldn't happen face to face.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

Providing there is no personal attack then all strong debate is good.....surely?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

I cringe at these threads,they always go tits up

but I will say as long as there are no personal attacks and people can behave and debate in an adult manner then there is nothing wrong with a difference of opinion

Sometimes things are perceived differently from one person to another

To cry bully because someone does'nt agree with you is not adult,but to pick people apart when there is no need is just as bad

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So..... is the Prime Minister being bullied everytime he's questioned by the opposition?

Are the police bullying me everytime they pull me over to "talk" to me?

Is just political correctness going mad again. I'm not a fan of the nanny state.

We are in danger of breeding a planet full of mambie pamies

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not seen any bullying or is a difference of opinion bullying? My idea of something is not the same has others. You will find peeps on here that don't like others. It's life. I do think if someone can't say anything nice to someone then don't. I have learnt now not to let sarcastic remarks get to me and I let them go over my head now.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I just dont like to see ops getting attacked for having an opinion then getting slated or ganged up on. So people a debate is good and play nice.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

"I just dont like to see ops getting attacked for having an opinion then getting slated or ganged up on. So people a debate is good and play nice."

If you do see that then report the people that you think are doing it if theres no mod around or speak up and say something if you feel you can

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Debates always get heated. It's differance of opinion same with preferences. I'm not on here to get into spats if a forum post got like that I'd step away. Yes I've seen some that will fight til the death but that's not for us.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think as long as you are prepared to stand by your _iews let others say what they like.

The only time I get a little annoyed is when I get personal messages basically accusing my Master of abusing me and having me brainwashed into having no opinion.

Katie. x

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *urreyfun2008Man
over a year ago

East Grinstead

There is a very fine line that is walked.

A major problem with online forums (mod vanilla ones) is that emotion is hard to judge from what many type and words can be miscontrued.

This makes arguments or debates something that can easily go off track and end up as trash TV.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You'll always get one that disagrees but on the whole I've enjoyed posting. We will give a good debate and stick by what we believe is right for us.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But people that belittle others for their own amusement and rip apart profiles then that is wrong and posts like that I've seen have been removed by the mods on here.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

"You'll always get one that disagrees but on the whole I've enjoyed posting. We will give a good debate and stick by what we believe is right for us. "

And so you should,I just ignore the picky people that seem to have nothing better to do than try to question every single word that is written on here

It does'nt show them in a good light and if they want to come across that way then good luck to them

Im come on here for fun not interrogtion and admin want the forums to be seen as lighthearted fun too.......not always possible though because of such a diverse group that use them

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

I've been a very active forum poster for a while now (too bloody active to be honest

) so I shall share my thoughts.

I have come to the conclusion that 'the clique' does not exist, it's just a bit of a phantom really. This phantom is caused by people simply disagreeing or having different opinions which, especially to new posters, can feel like they are being picked on. Those who are less argumentative tend to stay out of such debates and so it can feel as though all the circling sharks are of one mind at times, even though they aren't.

When you put your first post up and you get 50 people all telling you their opinion it can feel like you're being criticised by some sort of gang, but it's not... just 50 people with different opinions.

Once you post more regularly you get to realise the threads that are going to start an argument. Some regulars do seem to enjoy the cut and thrust of a good, er, debate, but its not for me...I can't be arsed to argue my point for 6 hours only no have made no impact one someone's _iews anyway...but, hey, go for it if you like it.

It is also caused by people posting questions about politics, race or any other tabloid headline and then being surprised when 200 people disagree with them and read things into every word they posted.

If you put fire up on the forum you're gonna get feckin burnt.

Sometimes the regulars may get carried away with a newbie, but this is usually a case of misunderstandings of jokes or tongue in cheek stuff, not bullying. I have seen many people, newbies included, actively defended from an out of order reply by the regulars.

If you see bullying, report it, let Admin decide. I think the Mods do a pretty good job at keeping things controlled, but they can't be everywhere at once.

Just my thoughts, many will disagree I'm sure.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just my thoughts, many will disagree I'm sure.

100% with you man...... well said!!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Great post Invictus

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We come on here to ask questions and read the posts and have a laugh some posts are so funny.

We have had tears in our eyes with laughter at some forum threads. It's great

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

Just my thoughts, many will disagree I'm sure.

100% with you man...... well said!!!

You're both full of shit! Screw you!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just my thoughts, many will disagree I'm sure.

100% with you man...... well said!!!

You're both full of shit! Screw you!"

Screw you too with brass knobs on. Miss miss he's a bully he pulled my pig tails

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just my thoughts, many will disagree I'm sure.

100% with you man...... well said!!!

You're both full of shit! Screw you!"

Haha..... Munkster.... I aint taking sloppy seconds..... ewwww.... nope.....nada,,,,,, Noooooooooooo!!!!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

Just my thoughts, many will disagree I'm sure.

100% with you man...... well said!!!

You're both full of shit! Screw you!"

In your dreams Monkey Boy!!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

"Great post Invictus "

...I was glaring when I typed it.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

...oh, smileys help in my opinion, they can help clarify a post.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think all in all your a lovely lot here , lol maybe big mouths at times but i sill like it. lol xx we like to know where we stand no beating around the bush .. xx

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

"no beating around the bush .. xx

I believe Vic will be making a thread on this very soon.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This thread is too serious, the dangleberry’s are back in the latest gallery though

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

WoooHoooooo!!! off to have a look then

Dunno why I want to have a look though

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In two years I have never witnessed 'bullying' on the forums. Nor have I been 'bullied'

I have had people make personal remarks. When they do I don't answer. The reason for this is that people who make personal remarks have no real opinions on a matter so for reasons best known to themselves they hit out like children.

Like previously said, I too will back off. Not because I cannot argue but I simply won't. The name callers already look totally stupid on their own without any help from anyone else. Also i come here for the luvvin not the shoutin'

I do not agree with a teeny part of Vickie's contribution. Threads do not start argument and insult - people do.

It would help if people understand the difference between debate and silly insult.

As for the 'clique' - it's a fallacy. We all sit in our own rooms - miles away from each other.

Responses are made to an O.P from all over the country. The responses made are not dependent on the opinion of a thread contributor. E.G I don't believe anyone says ....

'Oh HugeTittyWallyWank from Walsall says XYZ so I better say XYZ too'

People just post their own opinions.

The biggest problem for me - if there has been one - are the people that make incredibly paranoid perceptions and then bleat like babies to mothers all over the forums.

When I first started posting I pissed in the wind without any recognition or response.

Not ONCE did I shout 'No one luvs me.'

Still .....got to accept that there are all types of ages, creeds and mentalities in here.

In the interests of admin wanting the forums to be lighthearted...........

Tadaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa !!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This thread is too serious, the dangleberry’s are back in the latest gallery though

We don't have support so you'll have to draw us a picture

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

I do not agree with a teeny part of Vickie's contribution. Threads do not start argument and insult - people do.

Hmmmppppfffff!!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do not agree with a teeny part of Vickie's contribution. Threads do not start argument and insult - people do.

Hmmmppppfffff!!!

Hey I love it when you Hmmmmmmmpppfffff that way x

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just my thoughts, many will disagree I'm sure.

I think you need to stop over exerting yourself today...

did you sit down after writing such a sensible post? Have you taken your medication?

and I think you best come see your therapist..??

Katie. x

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tadaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa !! "

Ha,,,, I;m with you Granny... 100%.....

Oh, I know previoisly I said I was 100% with Viccyboi.... but shucks..... I mean his post is a bit old hat now,,,and ya gotta keep mov'in with the times...don't ya,,,,,Rhetorically speaking of course!!!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

...and you're point is?

(hey this is easy

)

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ok group ((((((((hugs))))))))))))) feel the love i love you lot your posts make my days here in the back waters of Norfolk , lol xx not alot of nasty people here ... xv some just have stronger _iews and get pulled back off you lot at times not just mods x

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 16/02/11 14:41:05]

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...and you're point is?

(hey this is easy

its your not you're

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

"...and you're point is?

(hey this is easy

)

its your not you're

Oh...maybe it's not that easy.

That's Wendys fault, I type 'you're' by accident now as a nervous twitch in case her hyperborean grammatical wrath descends upon me...

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In two years I have never witnessed 'bullying' on the forums. Nor have I been 'bullied'

Tadaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa !! "

Good post Granny, my _iew differs a little,I have seen what I interpret as bullying (rarely), but whenever ive seen it recently other posters have attacked the bully. I think the self regulation on these forums is pretty good.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...and you're point is?

(hey this is easy

)

its your not you're

Oh...maybe it's not that easy.

That's Wendys fault, I type 'you're' by accident now as a nervous twitch in case her hyperborean grammatical wrath descends upon me...

It's Wendy's

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Well im back form the gallery

Did'nt see any dangleberries but did see someone like that old guy from Xfactor which was worse

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well im back form the gallery

Did'nt see any dangleberries but did see someone like that old guy from Xfactor which was worse"

I can't find the gallery

I'm being excluded and bullied... ( that should get me some attention

)

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well im back form the gallery

Did'nt see any dangleberries but did see someone like that old guy from Xfactor which was worse

I can't find the gallery

I'm being excluded and bullied... ( that should get me some attention

)"
gran you run rings around most here ,, lol xx in a nice way ok wendy ,, lol no like gran , lol

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

That _unky monkey is a proper bully.

Although it's fair to say that he's neglecting his bullying duties today!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 16/02/11 14:56:57]

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

"...and you're point is?

(hey this is easy

)

its your not you're

Oh...maybe it's not that easy.

That's Wendys fault, I type 'you're' by accident now as a nervous twitch in case her hyperborean grammatical wrath descends upon me...

It's Wendy's "

I' prefer' the' random' apostrophe' approach', I' like' to' keep' the' grammar' freaks' entertained'.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well im back form the gallery

Did'nt see any dangleberries but did see someone like that old guy from Xfactor which was worse

I can't find the gallery

I'm being excluded and bullied... ( that should get me some attention

) gran you run rings around most here ,, lol xx in a nice way ok wendy ,, lol no like gran , lol"

Whooooooooosh

n shrug ?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

"That _unky monkey is a proper bully.

Although it's fair to say that he's neglecting his bullying duties today!

Oi shut it you! I've been working!

Who said you could stand up anyway, bend back over! xxx

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its all in good fun...I can be stroppy on here sometimes as can a lot but I'm a pussy cat really. Had a debate this morning with a couple that have posted above me here (you know who you are!!) I didn't agree with them on that subject but that doesn't mean I don't like them. I actually think they look like very cool folk and I like their profile. No big deal...all with a pinch of salt!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That _unky monkey is a proper bully.

Although it's fair to say that he's neglecting his bullying duties today!

Oi shut it you! I've been working!

Who said you could stand up anyway, bend back over! xxx"

And on a different subject...nice pic _unky monkey....phwoar!!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

"That _unky monkey is a proper bully.

Although it's fair to say that he's neglecting his bullying duties today!

Oi shut it you! I've been working!

Who said you could stand up anyway, bend back over! xxx

And on a different subject...nice pic _unky monkey....phwoar!!! "

Thanks! I like your flower.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My _iew on the forums - its usually the same people posting. Nothing wrong with that i hear you say. Newbies are welcome, whether new to site, swinging or longterm members venturing into forums. But...there is a small clique group within the main group that jump on any new post possible. If its not one, its another. And each one usually gets backed up by another at least two.

For example, there was one poster who seemed quite new to forums about five months ago when i ventured in. She got jumped on. However she is now part of the clique. How did she join the clique? By backing up or joining the rest of the clique by jumping in on other threads. Now when she butts in to a post to slate someone or take the piss at the expense of the OP the OP is then jumped by her clique mates also if especially if the Op responds in defence. This has also happened to me twice in past six weeks, so of course i give back as good as i got by saying simply what they didnt want to hear.

How do i cope with them. Well im struggling, but what i end up doing is taking the 'p' back by saying what they dont want to hear, which really winds them up, and i love it. The usual posters on these occasions tend to sit back and watch the 'slow motion carcrash TV' but probably in my opinion fear typing anything further in the thread. They decide to let them get on with it. I cant. I detest bullies and usually bully back to see how they like it. And they usually dont. Sometimes when ive been jumped on here i come back with examples backing up my 'opinion', and im slated again. I come back with more info/examples and im ...ok you know what happens. But by this point ive wound up the bully, which turned into my initial aim. However, i do worry that my winding up the bullies to defend myself is putting a dim _iew on me from the nice decent people on this site, for which there are a lot. However, of all those ive met at two socials, they do not take part in forum discussions whether they are serious or humoured. I shouldve taken advice i received at my first social - dont take part often in forums. Only do so a little every now and then just to re-advertise yourself!

There are two ladies who have left this site since i come on, due to bullying on forums. One from quite far away but we were to meet when i travel to her area once a year to visit my aunt. The other was quite local to me (50miles away). The first lady got jumped every time she started a new post, be it a serious topic or just for fun and always by the small bullying clique. When there was a suggestion of anything towards jumping on her as the OP the rest of the bullying clique backed up the original bully. She ended up getting pushed from site by PM's from (it appears) the bullies using new accounts slating her for whining on the forums.

The second lass, she posted once, and got jumped on by twenty something following posts which werent even anything to do with the op topic - disgracful! And those twenty somethin g posts came from the usuall seven/eight in the clique. She disappeared for three months offline then came back on to let those she was speaking to, know why and that she was leaving for good. The next day her account did not exist.

Cyber bullying on these forums is a daily and regular occurance. I have tried to use scottish forum more recently but not as much new topics on there. However ive yet to come across bullying on scottish forum. One member of the clique takes part but does not bully. Another member of the clique from scotland tends not to take part in the scottish forums - i would imagine through fear of meeting same people in real world perhaps maybe at social or at club (be that even down south).

Ive dragged on again, but its behaviour of the clique that tends to make me drag on - to fully explain my _iews.

Oh, its quite strange how this thread has appeared after it was only yesterday that i went onto another thread about a new club, where the OP was being slated, and some of those doing the slating/bullying are part of that clique. Fortunately for the OP the new post was then deleted.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Differences of opinions and some who are more forceful than others in expressing those opinions

Bullies - No

Cliques - No

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *uss PussWoman
over a year ago

east cheshire

"That _unky monkey is a proper bully.

Although it's fair to say that he's neglecting his bullying duties today!

Oi shut it you! I've been working!

Who said you could stand up anyway, bend back over! xxx

And on a different subject...nice pic _unky monkey....phwoar!!!

Thanks! I like your flower.

he needs waxing

actually cellotape is cheaper

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Its all in good fun...I can be stroppy on here sometimes as can a lot but I'm a pussy cat really. Had a debate this morning with a couple that have posted above me here (you know who you are!!) I didn't agree with them on that subject but that doesn't mean I don't like them. I actually think they look like very cool folk and I like their profile. No big deal...all with a pinch of salt!

Same has happened to me with some. And they probably know who im talking about. May i add though that these 'some' do not appear to be part of the usual clique i have mentioned above. We will all fallout/disagree with people. Thats ok so long as we allow other peoples opinion as their opinions and that no two people are exactly the same.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My _iew on the forums - its usually the same people posting. Nothing wrong with that i hear you say. Newbies are welcome, whether new to site, swinging or longterm members venturing into forums. But...there is a small clique group within the main group that jump on any new post possible. If its not one, its another. And each one usually gets backed up by another at least two.

Ive dragged on again, but its behaviour of the clique that tends to make me drag on - to fully explain my _iews.

Christ that was one hell of a long post, sorry though, I can't say I agree with any of it neither can I say that I've been witness to any of the actions described therin.

Maybe your getting mixed up with another forum

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

*puts down bully mask & takes off clique T-shirt. Enters thread*

Hmmm, okay.

What hasnt been mentioned yet, but happens a lot is when a poster, let's call them 'Twat A' starts a thread with either a contentious statement e.g "bi = gay" or a one line numbskull fantasy/desire e.g "luv fat birds on me cok".

At this point, our OP then disappears, never to be seen again on the thread. He's legged it, fucked off, gone out, or otherwise made him(or her, for the pedants)self scarce.

Cue the thread taking legs and running on it's own. you've got your pros, you've got your antis, you've got your insightfuls and you've got your humourists.

At some stage a combination of these posters starts getting into a pissing contest, usually about what the meaning of the thread is, and whether the OP is in fact a complete twat, or just someone posting their opinion/stated preference etc.

This then degenerates into all-out warfare - stands are taken, positions are made clear and 'things' are said.

The next stage is my favourite bit.

Remember, the OP is by now but a distant dot on the horizon, has made no contribution whatsoever to the thread, and in fact hasnt even logged on in the last 6 hours.

Some holier than thou poster starts to argue that everyone is ganging up on the OP that he is being bullied and the posters are a pack of wolves tearing the OP to pieces and it's all such a shame and why oh why etc etc etc.

Where in fact, it's actually the same people who were in more or less the same pissing contest a couple of days ago on a thread put up by the same kind of OP.

And the world spins round one more time.

It's impossible not to notice that the quality of the thread and the level of debate on it is in direct proportion to the title/meaning of the thread and how the OP starts it rolling.

So, the next time you see a thread titled "New England in the Fall, the most beautiful place on earth?" you can and will see some amazing posts telling stories of where people have been and what they have seen/done there etc.

And the next time you see a post titled "luv wanking wiv fat birds" you'll see the level of debate follow the tone set at the start. Until eventually the thread gets closed by a Mod because two posters are in a pissing contest arguing over whether or not the OP is a) being bullied, or b) a stupid fucking cunt who should have been drowned at birth.

(the correct answer is b)

And then there's a thread with the whole why oh why oh why are their bullies and cliques and people being nasty etc etc etc....

And the world spins round one more time.

And the next day there's a thread titled "my girl did a spunky fart lol" and the whole thing starts again.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

Ive dragged on again, but its behaviour of the clique that tends to make me drag on - to fully explain my _iews.

You often mix up strong debate with bullying, regarding the thread that was deleted yesterday....it was blatant advertising and the thread was repeated in at least Four other forums on here.

What followed was harmless banter....you just choose to read more into things than are actually there.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Sensual.........genius

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

"That _unky monkey is a proper bully.

Although it's fair to say that he's neglecting his bullying duties today!

Oi shut it you! I've been working!

Who said you could stand up anyway, bend back over! xxx

And on a different subject...nice pic _unky monkey....phwoar!!!

Thanks! I like your flower.

he needs waxing

actually cellotape is cheaper "

Ouch!!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think that's the problem some will read more into than others. If I don't like a forum post I ignore it. Bullying I've not seen differance of opinion I have.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

The kind of people who believe in gangs of bullies, cliques and co-ordinated attacks, are the kind of people who think the X-files is a documentary.

'Nuff said.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

"Sensual.........genius

Agreed!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

The harder I try and think of just one regular to name (just in my head) as a bully the harder it eludes me... *shrugs*

I can only conclude that there are no real bullies on the forums but there are plenty of victims.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The kind of people who believe in gangs of bullies, cliques and co-ordinated attacks, are the kind of people who think the X-files is a documentary.

'Nuff said."

X Files IS a documentary.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

"The kind of people who believe in gangs of bullies, cliques and co-ordinated attacks, are the kind of people who think the X-files is a documentary.

'Nuff said."

...they're watching you now...

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"The kind of people who believe in gangs of bullies, cliques and co-ordinated attacks, are the kind of people who think the X-files is a documentary.

'Nuff said.

X Files IS a documentary.

I rest my case.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The kind of people who believe in gangs of bullies, cliques and co-ordinated attacks, are the kind of people who think the X-files is a documentary.

'Nuff said.

...they're watching you now...

Trust No One

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

What followed was harmless banter....you just choose to read more into things than are actually there."

Acyually I have to disagree there, as I took the thread down, and although it would have had to come down as it was commercial, most of the posts were not banter at all.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

"The kind of people who believe in gangs of bullies, cliques and co-ordinated attacks, are the kind of people who think the X-files is a documentary.

'Nuff said.

...they're watching you now...

Trust No One

Tusk no one!

The tooth is out there!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ive dragged on again, but its behaviour of the clique that tends to make me drag on - to fully explain my _iews.

Thankyou, that was a very insightful post.

Is it possible that you can send to admin .... the 8 names of the clique and the things they have said thanks .

I know you can't do it in here and that makes it all seem a bit like fantastical hearsay doesn't it ?

Good luck xxxx

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The kind of people who believe in gangs of bullies, cliques and co-ordinated attacks, are the kind of people who think the X-files is a documentary.

'Nuff said.

...they're watching you now...

Trust No One

Tusk no one!

The tooth is out there!"

I knew it!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ive dragged on again, but its behaviour of the clique that tends to make me drag on - to fully explain my _iews.

Thankyou, that was a very insightful post.

Is it possible that you can send to admin .... the 8 names of the clique and the things they have said thanks .

I know you can't do it in here and that makes it all seem a bit like fantastical hearsay doesn't it ?

Good luck xxxx "

It's not that simple. Some of them are double agents

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's not that simple. Some of them are double agents

We know that don't we? Yes we do. She thinks we know nosseeeng.....

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Where do double agents domicile themselves for tax?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Where do double agents domicile themselves for tax?"

I believe if they tell you, they have to kill you...

but that's just what I've heard ...

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Where do double agents domicile themselves for tax?

I believe if they tell you, they have to kill you...

but that's just what I've heard ...

Interesting.

And you, with the 'Columbian Policeman' sunglasses, seem very well informed.

Are you, in fact "The Jackal"?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

I know of a lady who left the site due to 'bullying on the forums' and 'cliques out to get her'.

Her posts tended toward the judgemental and inflammatory shall we say. She came back with a new profile a month or two later and started it all again.

Tineye-Gate turned out to be the point she deleted her profile again - funnily enough.

There are no real bullies here I have seen, there are a few argumentative buggers I'll grant you. I have stepped in when I feel newbies are getting a bit overwhelmed by proffered opinions, but it's pretty rare.

Sadly there are plenty of people willing to be 'victims' and others who want to be the Lone Ranger.

Just my opinion, stuff yours where you like.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tineye gate? Sounds political

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

It made an interesting afternoon thats all did'nt confrim anything as most people knew already....that the internet is full of fakes that love to create loads of profiles and sit at their pc all day creating havoc with them all

They're usually easy to spot and its amusing playing along with them as they act the innocent

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *uss PussWoman
over a year ago

east cheshire

"Tineye gate? Sounds political"

It was awsome

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"It made an interesting afternoon thats all did'nt confrim anything as most people knew already....that the internet is full of fakes that love to create loads of profiles and sit at their pc all day creating havoc with them all

They're usually easy to spot and its amusing playing along with them as they act the innocent

* nods *

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally ....I think some of you are into some serious denial if you can`t admit theres bullies on here ....these people exist ...are swingers some sub section of society thats immune from bullies or predators ...I don`t think so....

Bullies come in a various guises ....in my time on here I`ve spotted a couple ...dysfunctional..passively aggressive..or overtly aggressive..power and control freaks who love the attention and gratification that sometimes comes with seeing someone squirm ...

Bullies who mail behind the scenes, ain`t so good at hiding on here ....

I`ve eyes to see it ..false criticism..patronising sarcasm..etc blah blah ....bullying ain`t gona be physical ...its gona be psychlogical..obviously...the ease of being able to act this way online and possibly with some degree of annonmity makes it almost a flying certainty...false profiles is another one I guess..a cover to hide behind some resentment or personal agenda..

There it is .....its an adult world ...bound to be here as in any walk of life ....deal with it ....grow up...failing that complain ...theres mods here ...better than alot of circumstances I`ve seen ...

Ignoring can be a good policy ...or if yer that sensitive ....leave the forums alone ...

I`m being careful here to distinguish between banter or strong opinions...hopefully ..lol..

As a final word ...I don`t see much of it ....and its handled fairly well ...but there tis ...my take ...deal with it ..

That said ...I like it here..some wonderful peeps ..who far outway the few others ...

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Tineye gate? Sounds political

It was awsome

Damn, another one I missed.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Please don't keep hinting at who you are talking about or indeed pick people out to talk about.....keep it general.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Please don't keep hinting at who you are talking about or indeed pick people out to talk about.....keep it general."

"..some wonderful peeps .."

Pretty sure that was a direct reference to me.

I'm fine it, no need for a warning.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

"Please don't keep hinting at who you are talking about or indeed pick people out to talk about.....keep it general."

The lady I mentioned above may have been a man or TV.

How's that?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Please don't keep hinting at who you are talking about or indeed pick people out to talk about.....keep it general.

"..some wonderful peeps .."

Pretty sure that was a direct reference to me.

I'm fine it, no need for a warning.

hahaha...

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Ok I have been holding off......but...I think I am going to be in the minority.

This week alone a mod has had to step in on what she thought was bullying ( from what I saw I agreed with her) on a couple of threads because someone dared to start harmless threads that some people didn't want.

I have also had to take posts off this week from what can only be described as picking on someone.

It does happen on here, wether it is intentional or not.

Now some people might describe it as banter or piss taking, but to be a good piss taker or to banter well, you have to know when to stop too.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

lol @ you paranoid people

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

It's also worth noting that peoples sexuality, their perceived sexuality and other posters perception of their sexuality can have an influence on the way a thread develops.

Even if the argument isnt about sexuality on the thread.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *uss PussWoman
over a year ago

east cheshire

"Please don't keep hinting at who you are talking about or indeed pick people out to talk about.....keep it general.

"..some wonderful peeps .."

Pretty sure that was a direct reference to me.

I'm fine it, no need for a warning.

LOL

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *aughty_kittyWoman
over a year ago

finger licking good

i like getting picked on in the forums it turns me on.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *aughty_kittyWoman
over a year ago

finger licking good

"Ok I have been holding off......but...I think I am going to be in the minority.

I have also had to take posts off this week from what can only be described as picking on someone.

It does happen on here, wether it is intentional or not.

Now some people might describe it as banter or piss taking, but to be a good piss taker or to banter well, you have to know when to stop too."

no u took mine of last week lol

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"i like getting picked on in the forums it turns me on."

Shut it you skinny Sarf London bitch.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *uss PussWoman
over a year ago

east cheshire

"i like getting picked on in the forums it turns me on."

yeah well you have always been a kinky biatch

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"i like getting picked on in the forums it turns me on."

Oh shut up woman !!

( before anyone reports me for mod abuse I am kidding ! )

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *aughty_kittyWoman
over a year ago

finger licking good

"i like getting picked on in the forums it turns me on.

Shut it you skinny Sarf London bitch."

i dont like being called skinny! call me a real woman please

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *aughty_kittyWoman
over a year ago

finger licking good

"i like getting picked on in the forums it turns me on.

Oh shut up woman !!

( before anyone reports me for mod abuse I am kidding ! )"

no she aint lol its forplay

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"Ok I have been holding off......but...I think I am going to be in the minority.

I have also had to take posts off this week from what can only be described as picking on someone.

It does happen on here, wether it is intentional or not.

Now some people might describe it as banter or piss taking, but to be a good piss taker or to banter well, you have to know when to stop too.

no u took mine of last week lol"

Did I? lol well you are not called naughty for nowt !

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

"Ok I have been holding off......but...I think I am going to be in the minority.

I have also had to take posts off this week from what can only be described as picking on someone.

It does happen on here, wether it is intentional or not.

Now some people might describe it as banter or piss taking, but to be a good piss taker or to banter well, you have to know when to stop too."

I would hope some one would tell me if I overstep the mark at any point...I won't deny I can sometimes be a bit blinkered when I pursue a joke, but I never intend any harm.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"I would hope some one would tell me if I overstep the mark at any point...I won't deny I can sometimes be a bit blinkered when I pursue a joke, but I never intend any harm. "

Sometimes you're just REALLY HURTFUL okay?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *aughty_kittyWoman
over a year ago

finger licking good

"Ok I have been holding off......but...I think I am going to be in the minority.

I have also had to take posts off this week from what can only be described as picking on someone.

It does happen on here, wether it is intentional or not.

Now some people might describe it as banter or piss taking, but to be a good piss taker or to banter well, you have to know when to stop too.

I would hope some one would tell me if I overstep the mark at any point...I won't deny I can sometimes be a bit blinkered when I pursue a joke, but I never intend any harm. "

u having a laugh no one will say hey that offends me they will try to out wit ya till u top urself with sadness its murder in here

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"I would hope some one would tell me if I overstep the mark at any point...I won't deny I can sometimes be a bit blinkered when I pursue a joke, but I never intend any harm.

Sometimes you're just REALLY HURTFUL okay?"

Is that when he got more attention as you wouldn't drop your trousers and show us your bum too?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

"I would hope some one would tell me if I overstep the mark at any point...I won't deny I can sometimes be a bit blinkered when I pursue a joke, but I never intend any harm.

Sometimes you're just REALLY HURTFUL okay?"

Are you one of those Caucasians by any chance!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"I would hope some one would tell me if I overstep the mark at any point...I won't deny I can sometimes be a bit blinkered when I pursue a joke, but I never intend any harm.

Sometimes you're just REALLY HURTFUL okay?

Is that when he got more attention as you wouldn't drop your trousers and show us your bum too?"

No!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *uss PussWoman
over a year ago

east cheshire

"I would hope some one would tell me if I overstep the mark at any point...I won't deny I can sometimes be a bit blinkered when I pursue a joke, but I never intend any harm.

Sometimes you're just REALLY HURTFUL okay?

Is that when he got more attention as you wouldn't drop your trousers and show us your bum too?"

Oy ruggers, stop bullying him to show his bum

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Ah ha, another bum !

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"I would hope some one would tell me if I overstep the mark at any point...I won't deny I can sometimes be a bit blinkered when I pursue a joke, but I never intend any harm.

Sometimes you're just REALLY HURTFUL okay?

Is that when he got more attention as you wouldn't drop your trousers and show us your bum too?

Oy ruggers, stop bullying him to show his bum

It worked

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *uss PussWoman
over a year ago

east cheshire

"Ah ha, another bum !"

make him put em back on

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"I would hope some one would tell me if I overstep the mark at any point...I won't deny I can sometimes be a bit blinkered when I pursue a joke, but I never intend any harm.

Sometimes you're just REALLY HURTFUL okay?

Are you one of those Caucasians by any chance!

I'd shout racist, but all the Mods are in the 'we love his bum' clique and will bully me endlessly if I cross them.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ig badMan
over a year ago

Up North :-)

I have to smile here because we ll know there is bullying to an extent at times on here. Mostly it is deleted by the mods as some of it is bloody offensive at times and uncalled for. It happens unfortunately and often in a pack frenzy style. Don’t believe me? Well ask the mods how many offensive posts they have to remove.

I will grant you there is a very fine line between heated debate and an attack and I am not one for throttling debate. However the threads like ‘what do you think of my profile’ or who wants their pussy eaten or similar you know what is going to happen and surly as eggs are eggs some individuals will feel the need to be catty, sarcastic, rude or in the worst cases offensive. What I can say though again the mods are pretty good of removing things.

Maybe it is because I have been here longer that a lot of you I don’t know. Maybe its because I sometimes read threads without posting. It might be because people will mail me pointing things out or asking for advice or a combination of many things who knows but like as might I won’t deny I have seen bullying on here as I have. I have even collected a few clipped threads with some shameful examples on them.

The clique issue is a different one. Mainly because the use of the word Clique is often used in derogatory or negative posts. Its used to describe a body of people who stick together. Now I know that there are groups on here who do exactly that. Most of the time though it is because they have met, formed real life friendships which in my opinion isn’t a bad thing at all. However you will as in all areas in life get friends sticking up for each other. Now you can call that cliquish or what you like but it happens thorough life and you will have experienced it firsthand if you have good friends.

There are other mall groups/individuals on here that have other agendas. Often I suspect not really nice ones for whatever reason. There are individuals who will fire start, delete profiles and create another. It happens here as in most forums and does disrupt things in a negative way which is a shame.

What I can happily say is there isn’t one clique though, there may be a few if you want to use that word and there is justification i guess for its use but I would rather think of those people as good friends of each other than a clique.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's also worth noting that peoples sexuality, their perceived sexuality and other posters perception of their sexuality can have an influence on the way a thread develops.

Even if the argument isnt about sexuality on the thread.

omg! I didn't recognise you in colour ! x

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Cliques, arguements and bullying all take place on here to some degree. But its just the same in the real world. Judging by the posts that i see get removed the actual ones that fall into the last group are in the minority but consistant

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Where do double agents domicile themselves for tax?

I believe if they tell you, they have to kill you...

but that's just what I've heard ...

Interesting.

And you, with the 'Columbian Policeman' sunglasses, seem very well informed.

Are you, in fact "The Jackal"?"

No! And shhhh ... not so loud...

They're listening

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sarcasm is not bullying

Catty remarks are not bullying.

A sustained attempt to belittle or demean a weaker person can be an example of bullying.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Wheres the other half of Sensuals leg?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ig badMan
over a year ago

Up North :-)

"Sarcasm is not bullying

Catty remarks are not bullying.

A sustained attempt to belittle or demean a weaker person can be an example of bullying.

When they are used to stir up an attack they are Granny. The first post on a contentious thread often sets the mood of the following one. Not dissimilar to one hyena taking a bite and the others following.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

I blame the night crew, they must all be the bullies

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Wheres the other half of Sensuals leg?

Shurrup.

I was bullied into that by a clique of screaming haridens.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sarcasm is not bullying

Catty remarks are not bullying.

A sustained attempt to belittle or demean a weaker person can be an example of bullying.

Okay intention dependent then ... I could name really fun sarky people here .. it never leads to bullying.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sarcasm is not bullying

Catty remarks are not bullying.

A sustained attempt to belittle or demean a weaker person can be an example of bullying.

I think of that more as pack mentality rather than bullying. To be honest, I think grown ups should have got to the stage where they can handle themselves. They're old enough to know sticks and stones ... blah blah blah, especially on an internet website. Bullies are cowards, that's not news. If people feel bullied they should just ignore those they perceive to be bullies. I don't tend to think of people I don't like because they're arrogant or aggressive as bullies, I just think of them as morons and at least I know, from their online persona, (which does count to me) that I'd never meet them, not in a zillion years. So bullies? hmmm ... nah, tossers? yeah, course there are. Nobody is gonna like everybody and thank f**k for that!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sarcasm is not bullying

Catty remarks are not bullying.

A sustained attempt to belittle or demean a weaker person can be an example of bullying.

now give me your dinner money!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ig badMan
over a year ago

Up North :-)

"Sarcasm is not bullying

Catty remarks are not bullying.

A sustained attempt to belittle or demean a weaker person can be an example of bullying.

Okay intention dependent then ... I could name really fun sarky people here .. it never leads to bullying. "

Well i could name people who have done exactly what i have said. I even have a copy of the odd thread that has now been deleted as the mods felt it necessary to remove the thread.

I am well aware that some drop the tracer flare for others to follow. Maybe its a good job we can't name names aye!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sarcasm is not bullying

Catty remarks are not bullying.

A sustained attempt to belittle or demean a weaker person can be an example of bullying.

now give me your dinner money!

I only have vodka money ... you brave enuff to fight me for that

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sarcasm is not bullying

Catty remarks are not bullying.

A sustained attempt to belittle or demean a weaker person can be an example of bullying.

now give me your dinner money!

Don't worry about him Princess Pish .....He's still circulating the mini roundabouts at Alder Hey ....

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I love a great forum debate you are all wicked got tears of laughter you are all fabstars to me.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sarcasm is not bullying

Catty remarks are not bullying.

A sustained attempt to belittle or demean a weaker person can be an example of bullying.

Okay intention dependent then ... I could name really fun sarky people here .. it never leads to bullying.

Well i could name people who have done exactly what i have said. I even have a copy of the odd thread that has now been deleted as the mods felt it necessary to remove the thread.

I am well aware that some drop the tracer flare for others to follow. Maybe its a good job we can't name names aye! "

Dunno ... it all seems inconsequential to me BB ..

Did you send it to admin ?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Ive often said that the first response to a thread can lead the way on how the thread goes

It also seems to depend on the forum mood at the time,sometimes in here its chaos and frivolity and other times its grrrrrr feck off!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ig badMan
over a year ago

Up North :-)

"Sarcasm is not bullying

Catty remarks are not bullying.

A sustained attempt to belittle or demean a weaker person can be an example of bullying.

Okay intention dependent then ... I could name really fun sarky people here .. it never leads to bullying.

Well i could name people who have done exactly what i have said. I even have a copy of the odd thread that has now been deleted as the mods felt it necessary to remove the thread.

I am well aware that some drop the tracer flare for others to follow. Maybe its a good job we can't name names aye!

Dunno ... it all seems inconsequential to me BB ..

Did you send it to admin ?"

Admin already have the threads why would i want to send it to them? The mods deleted it because it got out of hand. But its not just the once or even twice or thrice. It happens pretty regularly often by the same people.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sarcasm is not bullying

Catty remarks are not bullying.

A sustained attempt to belittle or demean a weaker person can be an example of bullying.

now give me your dinner money!

I only have vodka money ... you brave enuff to fight me for that

i may be young, but im wise enough to know not to fight a woman for her alcohol money

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"I love a great forum debate you are...wicked got tears of laughter you are...fab to me."

Another direct reference to me.

I'm fine it, no need for a warning.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ig badMan
over a year ago

Up North :-)

"Ive often said that the first response to a thread can lead the way on how the thread goes

It also seems to depend on the forum mood at the time,sometimes in here its chaos and frivolity and other times its grrrrrr feck off!"

Absolutely spot on! A sarcastic reply goes on, then another and a feeding frenzy often occurs. Yet if a humorous remark goes on then there is no kill to follow by the sheep with teeth.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

"Ive often said that the first response to a thread can lead the way on how the thread goes

It also seems to depend on the forum mood at the time,sometimes in here its chaos and frivolity and other times its grrrrrr feck off!"

There is truth in that. I often go into the Introductions room and say a nice hello to the newbies for that reason.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Im guilty of ignoring the introduction forum a lot of the time,I should make a bit more effort

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Ive often said that the first response to a thread can lead the way on how the thread goes

It also seems to depend on the forum mood at the time,sometimes in here its chaos and frivolity and other times its grrrrrr feck off!

There is truth in that. I often go into the Introductions room and say a nice hello to the newbies for that reason.

And i recently gave pointers to some single guys who were looking for profile/how to get a meet advice.

And was then accused of being some kind of 'profile Police'....

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just my thoughts, many will disagree I'm sure.

100% disagree with you but hey as everyone on here says (just before ripping someone to bits!) to each there own.

I have not found these forums a friendly place (got burnt many years ago on here just after joining), I DO find them 'cicky'. So I hardly ever post.

But for some its a great social place, just not for others.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"Im guilty of ignoring the introduction forum a lot of the time,I should make a bit more effort

"
Maybe we all should HPC

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Is it just me?

Or does anyone else find it hysterically funny that the post 2 above has stopped this thread dead in it's tracks.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

[Removed by poster at 16/02/11 17:50:15]

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

I think there is more invisible bullying than visible.

If there is a heated exchange between people, then they should go to private message and try and resolve.

The invisible bullying is the behind the scenes messaging between people to try and gang up. It is evidenced when people come back and say they were overwhelmed with messages supporting, commenting on the other posters blah di blah.

If people were to be more honest, candid and stay within the rules...... and agree to disagree on subjects.

It is when people follow posters they have a beef with and pick their posts on others threads... it gets silly.

and knowing when to drop it.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just my thoughts, many will disagree I'm sure.

100% disagree with you but hey as everyone on here says (just before ripping someone to bits!) to each there own.

I have not found these forums a friendly place (got burnt many years ago on here just after joining), I DO find them 'cicky'. So I hardly ever post.

But for some its a great social place, just not for others.

"
well come back and post xx i will cover your back sure lots will. lol. xxx some here just have to be right when maybe theres other _iews thats what make it fun xx seeing them finding ways of putting there _iews across , again and again ..

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank you for the welcome back lol

A lot of people whonpost on here (whilst I might not agree with them all) are friendly. Its the small group that have made it somewhere We are uncomfortable with.

To the poster who said about political correctness, yes I agree, but you have to of suffered from some real bullying to understand how hurtfull it can be.

Its easy to get a 'chip on your sholder' ie you have been burnt once so you look out for it.

Having said that many a post is fun.

I may not post much but I do read. Some get me laughing, some make me fumming.

Swinging is fun and thats the way I want to keep it.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ibrosMan
over a year ago

harrow

arrive a couple of hours late and you've long missed a chance to reply to something said earlier.

I'd promised myself not to waste time reading a 1000 word post, then grannycrumpet says something inciteful and I'm obliged to read it. Thanks.

Where was I going with this? Nowhere. Oh, I remember.

Its one thing to post a reply, quite another to be an OP. Haven't yet crossed that rubricon.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you for the welcome back lol

A lot of people whonpost on here (whilst I might not agree with them all) are friendly. Its the small group that have made it somewhere We are uncomfortable with.

To the poster who said about political correctness, yes I agree, but you have to of suffered from some real bullying to understand how hurtfull it can be.

Its easy to get a 'chip on your sholder' ie you have been burnt once so you look out for it.

Having said that many a post is fun.

I may not post much but I do read. Some get me laughing, some make me fumming.

Swinging is fun and thats the way I want to keep it.

"
over the years on sites i have had crap too xx But you live and learn .. you learn you dont have to go down to level of some others and be yourself .. I hope we get to see you posting again xx jo

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"*puts down bully mask & takes off clique T-shirt. Enters thread*

Hmmm, okay.

At this point, our OP then disappears, never to be seen again on the thread. He's legged it, fucked off, gone out, or otherwise made him(or her, for the pedants)self scarce.

Cue the thread taking legs and running on it's own. you've got your pros, you've got your antis, you've got your insightfuls and you've got your humourists.

This then degenerates into all-out warfare - stands are taken, positions are made clear and 'things' are said.

The next stage is my favourite bit.

Remember, the OP is by now but a distant dot on the horizon, has made no contribution whatsoever to the thread, and in fact hasnt even logged on in the last 6 hours.

Where in fact, it's actually the same people who were in more or less the same pissing contest a couple of days ago on a thread put up by the same kind of OP.

And the world spins round one more time.

It's impossible not to notice that the quality of the thread and the level of debate on it is in direct proportion to the title/meaning of the thread and how the OP starts it rolling.

(the correct answer is b)

And then there's a thread with the whole why oh why oh why are their bullies and cliques and people being nasty etc etc etc....

And the world spins round one more time.

And the next day there's a thread titled "my girl did a spunky fart lol" and the whole thing starts again.

Well said sensual the idea that bullying doesn't exist on these forums is a joke.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

actually funnily enough the one time you do then to see "cliques" on here.....

when someone who doesn't use the forums very often,

comes in and say something...

are then challenged on what they say...

get huffy with what was said....

and then there "friends" all come in to back them up....

do i think there are cliques here... no, the example i use is always the pub, are all the regs in the pub going to speak to you straight away as soon as you come in first time in.... of course not....

do i think there is bullying... no...

some people are just better at putting a point across, and some people take the huff, i am sorry... this isn't a love in, like real life i ain't going to agree with everything someone says... such is life...

right..... i am going to go and watch the fooball now.....

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do think that sometimes there is a nasty undercurrent on the forums on particular threads. Whether its bullying I cant say. I havent noticed one singular person being followed around by the same group and slated as such, but I have seen threads go tits up for no reason. Well there is a reason, its usually by one person who has taken a dislike, whether it be a form of jealousy, or oneupmanship or whatever, to the OP, who will see an outlet for a nasty comment, post it and then its almost like a pack of hyenas will descend.

I am never sure what the best way to deal with it is. There are some who take the _iew of stepping back, and that does work, takes a lot of willpower to do though. I always want to be one of these step back reserved intelligent types, but part of me thinks that if you let someone get away with one comment, they will continually try it on with you, so is it better to bite back and let them know that you wont tolerate such behaviour. Problem with that is it usually gets 100 times more heated then it would originally and you could be playing into the bully's hands.

But it has to be said that the heated debates are the best.

Apart from Tineye gate which was the best ever. I didnt even want to leave my pc to go to the loo that day it was so good.

We can all make mistakes, I certainly do, but I can honestly say that I have never, or would never, private message others to try and gang up on certain other users, that is despicable.

Cliques, hmmm again im not sure if its a clique as such, groups of people are friends because they've met on socials etc, so its obvious they will have more of a bond, which may come across as being cliquey. I dislike threads which are meaningless to the majority and are only relevant to a chosen few. I think those threads should be removed because this is a public forum, so personal things that are alluded to after a social, in my opinion, have no place here. Take them to private message.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

Having been badly bullied on a forum elsewhere,i have to say i see very little evidence of it here.

Of course there may be nuances i miss,being relatively new but if it is that subtle can it be called bullying?

As far as cliques are concerned,i think any arena where a small number of people post regularly and know each other well can appear cliquey.However the question is are newcomers welcome,as a newbie i must say yes.

People cannot complain if they do not know every "in" joke or reference.All they can do is throw themselves into the melee.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What I dont like to see is the totally unnecessary comments when a thread is started. Those along the lines of here we go again attitude especially with new members.

Good debate with differences of opinions is good as long as it does not become a personal attack

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

People refer to cliques as being negetive

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"actually funnily enough the one time you do then to see "cliques" on here.....

when someone who doesn't use the forums very often,

comes in and say something...

are then challenged on what they say...

get huffy with what was said....

and then there "friends" all come in to back them up....

do i think there is bullying... no...

right..... i am going to go and watch the fooball now..... "

Your opinion is well noted.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh yeah know what you mean, usually accompanied by this

I dont like ones that say, ooo lets sit back with the popcorn, ive said it before, but they are like the kids in a playground shouting scrap scrap scrap. If you want to say something, then do so, but dont encourage someone else too because you dont have the courage to do so.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *iteskinMan
over a year ago

Cardiff/Newport/Bristol/M4

i love it when on a number of my posts some peeps try to take it over and basically make a total moron of themseleves

i am all for different opinions but there is defo a select few on here who spend far too much time on every single post on every single forum posting about some stuff they really havent a clue about

then if you disagree with them they switch on you

water off a ducks back to me but i do know several peeps who wont ever post in here again for fear of getting cussed out for saying anything/or certain someones disect/dont like their profile

live and let live..too many keyboard warriors

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"People refer to cliques as being negetive

A clique is an inclusive group of people who share interests, _iews, purposes, patterns of behavior. Just by being a swinger we are all in a clique. If your a football fan your in a clique, you go to the pub your in a clique, we must all be in 100's of cliques if we stop and think about it. But being in a clique and being a bully are two completely different things"
so even if i think i am not in no click i am because i post here ?? I say it how i feel it not go on what others say i have to be true to myself ....... i think thers some lovely lovely people here really do .,.. i am sad to see people saying thay feel thay have been picked on ,, all i know most of us would stand up for whats right .

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have never felt I had been bullied in the forums.

There had been, and still have, some really arsey people about who like to lecture peeps, about their way of doing anything is the only way to do it, and always have to have the last say, and jam their opinions down other people's throats.

I would say what I have to say before moving on and then ignore them after that, as I believe there is no point in loosing any sleep over people I do not know or care about.

If they are gutless twats who have a go at me via PMs rather than via the open forums, then I would respond in kind, before reporting them for being abusive, and block them.

Again, no point in loosing sleep over such people!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"People refer to cliques as being negetive

I agree diamond. I've said before that only those who percieve themselves to be on the outside of a clique talk about the existence of cliques.

For example, when a thread about motorbikes is posted I don't comment on it for the simple reason that I haven't got the foggiest idea about which bike is best and how the open road on a Fireblade feels like - and I've no interest in it whatsoever.

Does that make me feel like there is a motorbike clique?

Nope, not one iota. It's just a few similar minded people talking about something they know well and love discussing.

As for bullying on the forums, yes, it does happen to a degree, but most regs on here know that if they descend into personal abuse the mods will remove the posts and possibly prevent the offender from posting again for a while, so they do it by stealth. I just chuckle inwardly at them as they usually contradict themselves sooner or later.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wishy is right I don't comment on any forum

post just for the sake of it. If I know bugger all about the subject I won't butt in. These forums have been a learning curve for me and Reno and we have learnt lots and had great feedback on our posts. If you don't join in then your never going to know what it's like on here. We lurked and we enjoyed what we saw so we joined in. You will always have some negative comments on a post but that's all.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

Perhaps 'The Bullied' now have their own little clique?

They could call it the 'Picked on Posse'

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

well i am here alot i dont see the click. I post but i am not in one , people will be to sceard to post here soon ... SOME FAB PEOPLE HERE XX

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

"well i am here alot i dont see the click. I post but i am not in one , people will be to sceard to post here soon ... SOME FAB PEOPLE HERE XX "

Jo, a clique isnt a bad thing, change the word from clique to like minded people

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"well i am here alot i dont see the click. I post but i am not in one , people will be to sceard to post here soon ... SOME FAB PEOPLE HERE XX

Jo, a clique isnt a bad thing, change the word from clique to like minded people"
yes liked minded as here too ,,, but i dont always read other peoples post ..... them long letter i cant handle xx

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Perhaps 'The Bullied' now have their own little clique?

They could call it the 'Picked on Posse'"

Or the 'Pissed on posse'

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

"Perhaps 'The Bullied' now have their own little clique?

They could call it the 'Picked on Posse'

Or the 'Pissed on posse'"

Even better....

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

When might disagreeing be considered to be more like bullying….

When it becomes about the person writing and not the subject they are writing on.

When people join forces to belittle someone by making crap up or assuming something about the person and stating it as a fact…. ie starting _umours

When people move from “your comment is twatish” to “you are a twat”

When a number of posters exclude a person from a forum conversation to openly discuss the excluded one.

When people post that they wish bad things happen to the person they are replying to…. not to make a point about the subject but just to wish them harm and distress.

Does this happen a lot… I don’t think so, but then again I sometimes only look and a handful of threads.

Does it happen sometimes… yep.

Is it always a regular poster who starts off the decline of a thread into something personal… nope, not always.

Does a person claiming they are being attacked for no reason or claiming they are being bullied always mean they are…. nope. Sometimes it’s the easy option for someone having a strop. This is usually when they have posted a question or statement and rather than genuinely seeking opinions/advice, they really just wanted everyone to agree with them… and didn’t get the response they were hoping for.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had peeps message me regarding my post today saying ignore them they are bullies and I messaged back. I said no ones bullied me but thanks for your concern.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"I had peeps message me regarding my post today saying ignore them they are bullies and I messaged back. I said no ones bullied me but thanks for your concern. "

Which is what we told you to say.

Well done.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ombre35Man
over a year ago

Manchester

[Removed by poster at 16/02/11 21:52:22]

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ombre35Man
over a year ago

Manchester

[Removed by poster at 16/02/11 21:55:59]

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

The 2 posts above demonstrate how scary the powers of the clique are.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *umourCouple
over a year ago

Rushden

Hmmmm... Anyone else noticed that as soon as Rugby posted that there is bullying in some form on here, how a number of people reposted and "modified" their _iews? That is the "Pack Mentality" in action. Rugby is a well respected Mod and naturly people take notice of her.

There are some who will deny the existance of any "Clique" on here despite their actually being several! A very wise man one said that "Those who say there are no Cliques are those inside so protected by it"

Of course, if you are even an unwitting member of a clique, you will get an easy ride so won't have the problems those new or just outside the Clique, get! Believe me, from out here you can see it!

Thing is, this is a swinging site where once you get yer kit off, everyone is equal! Problem is there are people who are trying too hard to be top dog!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 16/02/11 21:59:27]

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hmmmm... Anyone else noticed that as soon as Rugby posted that there is bullying in some form on here, how a number of people reposted and "modified" their _iews? That is the "Pack Mentality" in action. Rugby is a well respected Mod and naturly people take notice of her.

Of course, if you are even an unwitting member of a clique, you will get an easy ride so won't have the problems those new or just outside the Clique, get! Believe me, from out here you can see it!

Thing is, this is a swinging site where once you get yer kit off, everyone is equal! Problem is there are people who are trying too hard to be top dog!

Which clique are you in ? Denial is futile as you say ..... it's self delusion.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

So what do you think constitutes a clique?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *umourCouple
over a year ago

Rushden

As an addition to my last post. Those saying they haven't seen any bullying on here, couldn't that be because the offending posts are moved quite quickly by the Mods?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *umourCouple
over a year ago

Rushden

Both of you go back and read it again! I can see the cliques on here and I have been on the receiving end at times, so obviously I am NOT in one!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

I didn't notice the intro forum!

I like sarcasm.

I like banter.

I dislike arseholes.

I dislike liars.

I'm generally in the 'if you can't say nothing nice, don't say nothing at all' camp but there are days where I just want to be sarcastic. There are also days when I'll say something constructive.

I'd never bully anyone though and I'd hope that someone would say something if they thought that my posts were constantly getting at someone.

There are times when I cringe a bit when people are jumped all over. There are times when I've contributed to that but I would never do that with a _iew to bullying someone off a forum. Mainly cause that's just plain mean but also I think it's a little bit on the pathetic side.

The main problem is that some people just don't think when they post a thread. The fact that some of us do think is a factor. Another factor is that a lot of us have been around for a while and have seen them all before. Some days I can be bothered giving advice, some days I can't. It very much depends on the tone of the OP.

I'm not a big fan of the tea and sympathy brigade. Nor am I a fan of the whingers. The arseholes are the worst though. I don't agree with someone to keep up with some sort of imaginary clique. I agree with someone because I agree with the point they've made. I don't have anything to prove. I have no desire to keep up with or keep in with anyone. I'm just me, what you see is pretty much what you get, both online and offline.

I am guilty of not suffering fools gladly and once you make me think you're an arsehole, there's not much chance you're gonna change my mind. I have an imaginary ignore button.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Seconded DirtyGirl .....

Except I do suffer fools .. it's not a term I like so won't use it but the rest is spot on for me too.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Both of you go back and read it again! I can see the cliques on here and I have been on the receiving end at times, so obviously I am NOT in one!

Please tell me I am in one... please, am I , am I?

I have always want to be in one so I could kick everyone else out of it for being inferior mortals.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Both of you go back and read it again! I can see the cliques on here and I have been on the receiving end at times, so obviously I am NOT in one!

I read your post and understood it.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

"Both of you go back and read it again! I can see the cliques on here and I have been on the receiving end at times, so obviously I am NOT in one!

You are in the 'Nouveau Clique'...

Made up of members who feel they have been left out of an imaginary clique....so start their own clique.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Both of you go back and read it again! I can see the cliques on here and I have been on the receiving end at times, so obviously I am NOT in one!

Please tell me I am in one... please, am I , am I?

I have always want to be in one so I could kick everyone else out of it for being inferior mortals."

You are definitley in one - I promise.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Both of you go back and read it again! I can see the cliques on here and I have been on the receiving end at times, so obviously I am NOT in one!

Please tell me I am in one... please, am I , am I?

I have always want to be in one so I could kick everyone else out of it for being inferior mortals.

You are definitley in one - I promise. "

Ooowww goodie... who else is in it?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

I'm going to declare myself in the shoe clique! Who's with me?!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Both of you go back and read it again! I can see the cliques on here and I have been on the receiving end at times, so obviously I am NOT in one!

Please tell me I am in one... please, am I , am I?

I have always want to be in one so I could kick everyone else out of it for being inferior mortals.

You are definitley in one - I promise.

Ooowww goodie... who else is in it?"

membership = 1 elitist

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm going to declare myself in the shoe clique! Who's with me?!

Wot ....with those Converse.... leave me out .....

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ortheastcoupleukCouple
over a year ago

easington were the sun dont shine

"I'm going to declare myself in the shoe clique! Who's with me?!

"
no ya on ya arn poor sole

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

I can honestly say I don't notice any cliques on here... well not what I would call a clique.

I don't believe the reason I don't notice them is because I am in one. I do believe it may be the case that I don't notice because I don't care... and probably because I stay away from certain types of threads.

'If' there are cliques, whether I notice them or not... why should I give a shit about them? I would have to want to be part of it to care about not being in it.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Both of you go back and read it again! I can see the cliques on here and I have been on the receiving end at times, so obviously I am NOT in one!

Please tell me I am in one... please, am I , am I?

I have always want to be in one so I could kick everyone else out of it for being inferior mortals.

You are definitley in one - I promise.

Ooowww goodie... who else is in it?

membership = 1 elitist"

Just the way I like it

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ig badMan
over a year ago

Up North :-)

Christ i am copying this thread before it disappears! I haven't seen so much denial since the FBI said there was nothing to see down in Roswell!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Christ i am copying this thread before it disappears! I haven't seen so much denial since the FBI said there was nothing to see down in Roswell!

If you are doing that... would it be too much to ask for a summary of the first 170 or so posts.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Christ i am copying this thread before it disappears! I haven't seen so much denial since the FBI said there was nothing to see down in Roswell!

What there was to see was fabricated.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Christ i am copying this thread before it disappears! I haven't seen so much denial since the FBI said there was nothing to see down in Roswell!

Not sure who you mean really... I don't think I'm in denial but if you think otherwise about me I'd love to have a chat about it by PM.

I just think people read things differently. Some see a clique, usually those who don't perceive themselves to be in it.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ig badMan
over a year ago

Up North :-)

"Christ i am copying this thread before it disappears! I haven't seen so much denial since the FBI said there was nothing to see down in Roswell!

What there was to see was fabricated. "

Well i wasn't there but the existence of debris is documented in many sources.

Often you will find the people responsible for a situation are the first to deny its existence.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *amschwingerzCouple
over a year ago

West

"Heres one for you are there bullies/cliques in the forums or just difference of opinions. We have all been slated at one point or another for posting a thread. There is great banter in the forums but when does it turn into bullying. Your thoughts please."

When does it turn into bullying?...Id say when the comments are not acceptable to the individual..but like reality, in the workplace sometimes people dont always know or realise that they are actually bullying..sometimes its accidental ..and things are often misconstrued and lost in translation when typed..

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Christ i am copying this thread before it disappears! I haven't seen so much denial since the FBI said there was nothing to see down in Roswell!

What there was to see was fabricated.

Well i wasn't there but the existence of debris is documented in many sources.

Often you will find the people responsible for a situation are the first to deny its existence. "

No conclusive evidence re Roswell as far as I know but im not widely read on it.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Often you will find the people responsible for a situation are the first to deny its existence. "

I have never been abducted by aliens, nor are said aliens abduct other humans for their research with or without my help and I am not an evil genius planning to take over the world with the alien secret energy source.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My _iews and opinions are my own.

I am not a sheep, and am capable of independent thinking.

I know the difference between subjective opinion and objective evidence.

I do not believe I am part of any cliques. Any claim that I am one needs to be supported by objective evidence.

I believe I have never bullied anyone, on FAB or otherwise.

I may not be always right, however, I believe I am seldom wrong.

I am quick to put my hands up to say sorry I am wrong/incorrect, providing it can be proven to be wrong/incorrect with objective evidence and not hear-say or gutfeel.

In short, I am my own person.

Whether peeps like me or not is no skin off my nose. I am not on FAB or other forums that I participate to be "Miss Popular".

I like myself, and that is what counts the most.

And I like to be surrounded by happy, optimistic people. Moaners and whingers drain my energy, and I strongly believe life is too short to be bitter and unhappy.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

I have another profile - quite legitimately - a few months ago I came into the forums using that profile - as I wasn't recognised by any one I was mercilessy bullied and ragged - one one thread I made a point disagreeing and offering a different opinion to one of the regulars and was attacked - later one of the same regulars amde the same point and everyone agreed. I don't come in too often and although I can be sarcy at times, try to be as uncontroversial as possible. So, I agree with BB and Ruggers - bullying does go on at times, it's just one of those things, part of life I suppose. Z

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Often you will find the people responsible for a situation are the first to deny its existence.

ahhhhhhh denial ......

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ig badMan
over a year ago

Up North :-)

"Christ i am copying this thread before it disappears! I haven't seen so much denial since the FBI said there was nothing to see down in Roswell!

What there was to see was fabricated.

Well i wasn't there but the existence of debris is documented in many sources.

Often you will find the people responsible for a situation are the first to deny its existence.

No conclusive evidence re Roswell as far as I know but im not widely read on it.

There was a crash, there was an incident. What it was is unclear as the debris was possibly from the USSR or maybe even the US governments undisclosed development. The fact is there was an incident and was denied by people who did not want other people to believe it.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

Often you will find the people responsible for a situation are the first to deny its existence.

ahhhhhhh denial ...... "

Isn't that a river in Egypt? Z

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Often you will find the people responsible for a situation are the first to deny its existence.

ahhhhhhh denial ......

Isn't that a river in Egypt? Z"

Yeah ......and D amson is in Sth America

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 16/02/11 22:44:19]

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm going to declare myself in the shoe clique! Who's with me?!

Hmmmm shoe shopping count me in

H. x

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ig badMan
over a year ago

Up North :-)

"I have another profile - quite legitimately - a few months ago I came into the forums using that profile - as I wasn't recognised by any one I was mercilessy bullied and ragged - one one thread I made a point disagreeing and offering a different opinion to one of the regulars and was attacked - later one of the same regulars amde the same point and everyone agreed. I don't come in too often and although I can be sarcy at times, try to be as uncontroversial as possible. So, I agree with BB and Ruggers - bullying does go on at times, it's just one of those things, part of life I suppose. Z"

Well that's a pretty positive affirmation of what goes on from the first perspective.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

It's a non-denial denial.

He just doesn't know what it it he isn't denying.

I would imagine it's similar to being an "unwitting member of a clique".

I would imagine.

(did I just bully someone?)

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Christ i am copying this thread before it disappears! I haven't seen so much denial since the FBI said there was nothing to see down in Roswell!

What there was to see was fabricated.

Well i wasn't there but the existence of debris is documented in many sources.

Often you will find the people responsible for a situation are the first to deny its existence.

No conclusive evidence re Roswell as far as I know but im not widely read on it.

If someone admits it they did it

If someone denies it they did it

What kind of ducking stool is this ?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I love sarcasm....I`ve maintained fer a long time sarcasm can be the highest form of wit ....I`ve met some beauties, who are great at sarcasm ...theres some good examples here s`well ...very funny peeps..however sarcasm can have a connotation and its the motive thats important ....

Cliques does seem to have a negative ring to it ...doesn`t it !!....erm if you was to ask me lol...nah!! Its obvious isn`t it !!..

Enough to say you don`t have to be part of any erm!! ....to join in here ..

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

I don't mean to be funny when I ask... could you bump the thread so I (and others) can see the bigger picture?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are we not adults? I would hope that as adults we'd be able to take sarcastic comments on the chin and not rise to the bait. Yes I've seen peeps be ripped to threads on here for poor spelling, bad photos etc etc etc but I've seen the mods step in.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

I don't mean to be funny when I ask... could you bump the thread so I (and others) can see the bigger picture?"

I haven't got the time or the inclination to do that I'm afraid you'll just have to take my word for it! Z

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside

Right, that's an hour of my life I won't get back again after reading all through this thread!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is a long read, more war and peace

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside

"It is a long read, more war and peace"

I just like peace!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Right, that's an hour of my life I won't get back again after reading all through this thread!

You should have PM'd me, I'd have given you a synopsis.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

And getting too long to load.

If anyone wants to carry on the conversation then maybe start part 2 please.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And getting too long to load.

If anyone wants to carry on the conversation then maybe start part 2 please."

I think it's all been said. I'd rather it died.

It'll be back next week anyhow.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Right, that's an hour of my life I won't get back again after reading all through this thread!

You should have PM'd me, I'd have given you a synopsis.

I wanted one of those!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago

glasgow

not bullying,but there are times.when people read,a perfectly innocent post,and try to turn it into something else.to suit their own ends,and get a dig in.

also some of the people,who whinge, other people should have a thicker skin.often have the thinnest skins themselves.

the forums would be crap,if we all agreed.

vive la difference.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside

Do I win an extra point now?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Christ i am copying this thread before it disappears! I haven't seen so much denial since the FBI said there was nothing to see down in Roswell!

Oh! Not just me then. Was beginning to wonder what mind altering drugs people are on!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside

I want to be last again!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately