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"I'm now 28 and I'm 99percent sure I don't want kids. My question has anyone gone through life not wanting kids and later in life thought "shit I want them!" And it maybe been too late? " I think you have to make a distinction between not wanting kids "now" and not wanting them "ever". Like you I've been in the "don't want" camp but I'm pretty clear it's for now. The later is somewhat dependent on having a husband which doesn't exist at this moment in time | |||
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"I'm now 28 and I'm 99percent sure I don't want kids. My question has anyone gone through life not wanting kids and later in life thought "shit I want them!" And it maybe been too late? " I never wanted kids either when I was your age as I was too busy being selfish and enjoying myself, plus I had a good job and travelled all over...fast forward 10 years I realised having one would be a good thing ...which turned out to be the best decision I'd ever made.. | |||
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"I'm now 28 and I'm 99percent sure I don't want kids. My question has anyone gone through life not wanting kids and later in life thought "shit I want them!" And it maybe been too late? " I was the same. At 30 it hit me I wanted them. It never happened and it's a killer | |||
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"I never thought I'd have any...I have cerebral palsy, admittedly very mild. . but I always assumed it'd never happen. However, I met my now- ex, and I'm now firmly wrapped around the fingers of a 6 and 3 year old, and loving every minute with them, even when dealing with tantrums and impossible logic. It's hard sometimes, but I'd do it again. However, the chances are that'll be unlikely. In honesty, when they're with their mum and not here, these days I'm a lost soul...I found something I'm good at... | |||
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"I'm now 28 and I'm 99percent sure I don't want kids. My question has anyone gone through life not wanting kids and later in life thought "shit I want them!" And it maybe been too late? " Absolutely not; decided early on to focus on a career and enjoy holidays, travel, social life and have the ability to up and go at the snap of the fingers. questioned this a few times with the correct questions: Do you really want to bring a child into this world with the amount of troubles, hassles and lack of proper schooling, government and NHS, things are indeed going to get much worse, why bring a kid into this disruptive world? We can provide finance, good home send to private school but eventually that kid is going to have to step into the big bad world of shit; Alternatively, you can enjoy what you have without kids and visit amazing places, USA, Hawaii, Aus.; Malaysia, Vietnam and simply enjoy life Mnay will disagree but you did ask, do you have any regrets and for me its a BIG NO | |||
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"I'm desperate for a baby. It's a huge void in my life and the one thing I would do anything for then focus more on your wife rather than playing on here; after all you do say on your profile you are married but playing around alone | |||
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"I'm desperate for a baby. It's a huge void in my life and the one thing I would do anything for Who are you to judge or comment??? We don't know the reasons why they don't or can't have children. | |||
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"Used to do lots of babysitting as a teen, and wanted to be a Primary school teacher. LOVED children just didnt want any of my own.. they never featured in my 'dreams' Took precautions against having them, then got caught short. For a brief moment i thought of termination but wasnt an option as i was 6 month gone,, thought adoption for a few moments too.. then suddenly i just thought 'this is the hand of cards fate has dealt me,, just accept it' After PND i made it and now our bond is ridiculously tight. Feel bad looking back at how i felt, but id not be without her " like i have said its the best thing that as happened to us our Daughter | |||
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"I've got a couple going spare if anyone wants one?" | |||
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"I'm desperate for a baby. It's a huge void in my life and the one thing I would do anything for Mind you don't fall off that high horse, it can be a long way down.... | |||
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"I'm the opposite. I'd love to have children but with each passing year I find myself worrying that I've left it too late. " I'm in the same boat as you Evie, we are virtually the same age. I hope and believe that my time will come and I'll not be one of those who "never met the right man" | |||
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"It's never too late to become a parent. Theirs lots of children out there who are looking for a family to love and protect them. The adoption services are always looking for good parents, whether they're single mum's, single dad's or a couple." Do you know just how difficult it is to adopt? | |||
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"I'm now 28 and I'm 99percent sure I don't want kids. My question has anyone gone through life not wanting kids and later in life thought "shit I want them!" And it maybe been too late? " not myself but a good friend of mine and his partner have regretted it they have lots of pets and do respite care and fostering | |||
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"Incidentally my dad's wife has never wanted children and never regretted not having any. She was and is very focused on her career and will openly admit to being quite selfish when it comes to her free time. (just because I know how the forum trampoline works...I am not saying you cannot have a career if you have kids, I know very many successful people who have had both but that was her reasoning)" Nowadays that scenario is on the increase Evie, woman are leaving it later in life to try & have children, some with success others unfortunately without. And some, like your dads wife are happy just as they are. | |||
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"It's never too late to become a parent. Theirs lots of children out there who are looking for a family to love and protect them. The adoption services are always looking for good parents, whether they're single mum's, single dad's or a couple. Do you know just how difficult it is to adopt? " I looked into adoption, the whole process seems mind blowing from the start! | |||
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"I have no desire to actually have kids .... I don't see myself going through the whole birth thing.... However I want to be a mum so always wanted to adopt but I think I may change my mind in a few years and decide actually I want a child .... Depends if I find someone who's worth it " My sister never wanted the birth experience either. Didn't want babies full stop. Her husband was the same. They have an amazing life, mortgage free, foreign holidays, great jobs, top of the range Mercedes bought outright but they wanted to be parents so they adopted an eight years old girl from Brazil, They live in Italy and it took five years for them because they had to go through all kinds of psychological evaluations. In Italy adoption is the last resort, couples exhaust every avenue trying for their own child. My sister and her husband were seen as mad as adoption was their first choice. | |||
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"I don't want kids but I'm younger than you so this might not be helpful! The way I see it, if I change my mind and it is "too late" to have kids, there's hundreds of kiddies already in the world without loving parents, so I'd adopt. | |||
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"I'm desperate for a baby. It's a huge void in my life and the one thing I would do anything for How very rude!!! | |||
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"I'm desperate for a baby. It's a huge void in my life and the one thing I would do anything for | |||
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"I'm now 28 and I'm 99percent sure I don't want kids. My question has anyone gone through life not wanting kids and later in life thought "shit I want them!" And it maybe been too late? " Yes But I have a God-daughter and three nieces and nephews so it is not tooooo bad | |||
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"Really really really really really really really really don't want kids. Can't imagine my life tied down with kids and not being able to do whatever I wanted. Sounds selfish but it's much better than having kids just because that's what you think you should do." I can't say I feel tied down with them. They do take a lot of my time, and their mum does sometimes use that to her advantage to live " her" life with new bloke. . but that's her right. I don't mind. I just take them with me. . heh. Although I do understand what you're saying. | |||
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"Really really really really really really really really don't want kids. Can't imagine my life tied down with kids and not being able to do whatever I wanted. Sounds selfish but it's much better than having kids just because that's what you think you should do." it's not possible for this situation to be labelled selfish by anyone. if one decides not to have children then that's not selfish because the object to which the selfishness is directed doesn't exist, but if one has children then ignores them or treats them badly, then that is selfish. | |||
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"Really really really really really really really really don't want kids. Can't imagine my life tied down with kids and not being able to do whatever I wanted. Sounds selfish but it's much better than having kids just because that's what you think you should do. it's not possible for this situation to be labelled selfish by anyone. if one decides not to have children then that's not selfish because the object to which the selfishness is directed doesn't exist, but if one has children then ignores them or treats them badly, then that is selfish." | |||
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"I'm 32. Around children all day and love them to bits. Married but neither of us want kids. Had a termination which i don't regret but think about because it has occurred to me that it's not i don't want kids, but i don't want kids with my partner. Always wanted to foster but recently partner has changed his mind and that really hurts (esp since we'd set the ball rolling and the agencies were loving us due to our lifestyle and jobs etc). Feel totally lost in this situation...glad someone brought it up in here so i can have a read and think Can single people foster? If your partner's not 'the one'... | |||
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"I think it comes down to wanting them with the right person. I never wanted kids with my ex husband but am desperate for them with my current husband. Janey x" Very true finding the right person is so important someone whos your better half and feels the same about raising kids as you do xx I have a close friend who i wouldnt mind getting together with but just seeing what fate brings i guess xx | |||
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"Can single people foster? If your partner's not 'the one'..." The fostering agencies prefer people/one of the couple who only work part time or not at all. So i could foster as a single but I'd barely be able to afford it as a single person working part time. It's not ideal. | |||
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"I'm now 28 and I'm 99percent sure I don't want kids. My question has anyone gone through life not wanting kids and later in life thought "shit I want them!" And it maybe been too late? I never wanted kids either when I was your age as I was too busy being selfish and enjoying myself, plus I had a good job and travelled all over...fast forward 10 years I realised having one would be a good thing ...which turned out to be the best decision I'd ever made.." I don't see what you did as selfish at all so not sure why you'd think that | |||
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"I never wanted kids really until i was told i may not be able to have them and if i did want them i needed to have them now!!! 10 miscarriages later i am now 32 weeks pregnant at 34 years old...xx funny how been told u may not be able to made me realise i did... " Yeah it is funny xxx But congrats anyway hard with the miscarriages no doubt but worked out the end well done xxx | |||
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"I never wanted kids really until i was told i may not be able to have them and if i did want them i needed to have them now!!! 10 miscarriages later i am now 32 weeks pregnant at 34 years old...xx funny how been told u may not be able to made me realise i did... Yeah it is funny xxx But congrats anyway hard with the miscarriages no doubt but worked out the end well done xxx Thankyou x it has been an emotional rollercoaster but yes definatly worth it.... | |||
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"I'm now 28 and I'm 99percent sure I don't want kids. My question has anyone gone through life not wanting kids and later in life thought "shit I want them!" And it maybe been too late? " Well I have 2 and wish sometimes I hadn't of had them as they cost me a fortune in maintenance lol. In hindsight I should have used her bum lol But seriously at end of day its personal choice and the human race would end if all of us didn't have them | |||
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"Isn't there a thing where you can freeze your eggs/sperm to use later for artificial insemation wither on yourself or a surrogate? Maybe that's an option " Yes you can through ivf my sis did that had her first but had 5 other eggs frozen xxx Then 5 years later had her son from the same batch xxx | |||
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"Can single people foster? If your partner's not 'the one'... The fostering agencies prefer people/one of the couple who only work part time or not at all. So i could foster as a single but I'd barely be able to afford it as a single person working part time. It's not ideal." | |||
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"...... as they cost me a fortune in maintenance lol. In hindsight I should have used her bum." ROFL! EXCELLENT comment! I pay MASSIVELY More than I should in maintenance based on the time I have them...3 figures instead of a verified 2. But that's because for the next year youngest is still at nursery, so I provide half his fees through choice, and I want to make sure they don't go short. Once he's in main school, I'll dial it back to " more indicated" levels and put the difference in a bank for them. my only worry them is she starts to try and play silly for access. sigh | |||
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"Not interested at all. I fear it's going to be difficult to meet someone who feels the same." When I was single, it was on my dating profiles as am early stipulation. The amount of guys who gave me grief over it was unreal. Plus, people need to remember that being a mother is not as 'precious' a thing to everyone. I'd rather the lie ins and holidays six times a year but y'know... | |||
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"I'm desperate for a baby. It's a huge void in my life and the one thing I would do anything for Are you for real???? This is a comments thread on a swinging forum, its total existence is for "comments", without comments there would be no conversation and no communication So I will comment as and when I wish, if you are not happy with that, don't read | |||
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"I'm desperate for a baby. It's a huge void in my life and the one thing I would do anything for That may be the case, but that doesn't mean you have to be nasty, or judgemental. No one knows what's going on in another person's life. | |||
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"Not interested at all. I fear it's going to be difficult to meet someone who feels the same." There are quite a few women who don't want to have kids, there are lots of childfree sites on the internet and books about it. | |||
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"I'm now 28 and I'm 99percent sure I don't want kids. My question has anyone gone through life not wanting kids and later in life thought "shit I want them!" And it maybe been too late? " I am now 40 and don't have children. Certainly up to my mid 30's it never crossed my mind having children then as the 40's approached I thought maybe I should but the more my wife and I discussed we realised it wasn't what we wanted and are happier than ever without! | |||
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"I'm now 28 and I'm 99percent sure I don't want kids. My question has anyone gone through life not wanting kids and later in life thought "shit I want them!" And it maybe been too late? I am now 40 and don't have children. Certainly up to my mid 30's it never crossed my mind having children then as the 40's approached I thought maybe I should but the more my wife and I discussed we realised it wasn't what we wanted and are happier than ever without! | |||
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