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Can't talk to girls

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I realised that even now at the age of 37 I'm still crap at talking to women, and I think it shows. I'm especially bad at talking to women on Fab as I don't really understand what is women want to hear/read. Tried being friendly and polite. Tried the dirty old fucker approach; 'alright darling, nice legs. What do they open etc. How do you prefer to be approached on Fab?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm shit too. Face to face i am fine socialising but useless chatting women up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Watch and learn from more successful people,

Or just be yourself what have you got to lose

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By *S RachaelTV/TS
over a year ago

Lowestoft

you know of course that everyone is going to tell you to be yourself which is less than useless.

I have a confession. It's been several years since I've been in bed with a woman. Plenty of guys but they don't really do it for me like women. But my lifestyle precludes having a woman partner and I can't remember what it's like...and you develop a bit of a phobia.

Blimey what have iI said...

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Hove, mainly…

Just talk normally but type it. You don't say 'show us ya minge' in a bar, so why say it in here? Yes, it's not a bar but the basic premise remains. Just be yourself and let your personality shine through.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Hove, mainly…


"Just talk normally but type it. You don't say 'show us ya minge' in a bar, so why say it in here? Yes, it's not a bar but the basic premise remains. Just be yourself and let your personality shine through. "

Worse than useless advice apparently - what do I know?

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By *r.BlondeMan
over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

Be CONFIDENT women love it, look up a guy named corey Wayne on youtube

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Be CONFIDENT women love it, look up a guy named corey Wayne on youtube"

Yeah, slightly rapey pickup artists are really sexy!

FFS.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Just talk normally but type it. You don't say 'show us ya minge' in a bar, so why say it in here? Yes, it's not a bar but the basic premise remains. Just be yourself and let your personality shine through.

Worse than useless advice apparently - what do I know? "

Some men do get away with that shit though. I've seen it. The whole women love a bastard trick seem to work to. Being myself isn't exactly what women seem to want. The ones of come across romanticise am idea they have of me, the veil slips and the fabric of reality hits home. I also can't rely on alcohol to limber me up anymore

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

I can talk to people Jesus I can talk hind legs of donkey my problem is the next stage

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Women chat me up

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By *S RachaelTV/TS
over a year ago

Lowestoft


"Just talk normally but type it. You don't say 'show us ya minge' in a bar, so why say it in here? Yes, it's not a bar but the basic premise remains. Just be yourself and let your personality shine through.

Worse than useless advice apparently - what do I know? "

but he is being himself. And he's still not able to talk to women.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"you know of course that everyone is going to tell you to be yourself which is less than useless.

I have a confession. It's been several years since I've been in bed with a woman. Plenty of guys but they don't really do it for me like women. But my lifestyle precludes having a woman partner and I can't remember what it's like...and you develop a bit of a phobia.

Blimey what have iI said..."

I'd be interested to know how your lifestyle precludes women. I've seen some pretty crazy set-ups in my time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Try the "fuck it,won't hurt trying" approach. If they don't want to talk to you what have you lost? When you find someone you have things in common with the conversation should flow.

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By *S RachaelTV/TS
over a year ago

Lowestoft

[Removed by poster at 03/03/16 18:29:42]

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By *S RachaelTV/TS
over a year ago

Lowestoft


"you know of course that everyone is going to tell you to be yourself which is less than useless.

I have a confession. It's been several years since I've been in bed with a woman. Plenty of guys but they don't really do it for me like women. But my lifestyle precludes having a woman partner and I can't remember what it's like...and you develop a bit of a phobia.

Blimey what have iI said...

I'd be interested to know how your lifestyle precludes women. I've seen some pretty crazy set-ups in my time "

lol, women run for miles if I say I'm a TV..they want a bloke and I am a bit girly in real life too.. and I need a woman who will buy into my dressing because Im not going to give it up, Rachael is a part of me and \i have loads and loads of clothes and wigs.

Most married TVs have a bin liner or something that they keep hidden - my stuff is all over my flat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"you know of course that everyone is going to tell you to be yourself which is less than useless.

I have a confession. It's been several years since I've been in bed with a woman. Plenty of guys but they don't really do it for me like women. But my lifestyle precludes having a woman partner and I can't remember what it's like...and you develop a bit of a phobia.

Blimey what have iI said...

I'd be interested to know how your lifestyle precludes women. I've seen some pretty crazy set-ups in my time

lol, women run for miles if I say I'm a TV..they want a bloke and I am a bit girly in real life too.. and I need a woman who will buy into my dressing because Im not going to give it up, Rachael is a part of me and \i have loads and loads of clothes and wigs.

Most married TVs have a bin liner or something that they keep hidden - my stuff is all over my flat "

do they run a mile when yer dressed as a girl.

personally I find women flock to me

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Try the "fuck it,won't hurt trying" approach. If they don't want to talk to you what have you lost? "

The self confidence that takes a long time for me to build up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A guy could send me a message asking what I had for breakfast that morning and provided he was tall, handsome and had a big dick I'd respond to him and have a conversation with a view to meeting.

I really don't think if matters what you say as your opening message if you physically match what that particular person is looking for.

If you break things down in percentages you could find that 30%of women don't like long hair on a guy or 30% don't want to meet guys that are listed as bisexual or guys that want to meet TG's. That's over half the women on this site already taken out of the equation.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"A guy could send me a message asking what I had for breakfast that morning and provided he was tall, handsome and had a big dick I'd respond to him and have a conversation with a view to meeting.

I really don't think if matters what you say as your opening message if you physically match what that particular person is looking for.

If you break things down in percentages you could find that 30%of women don't like long hair on a guy or 30% don't want to meet guys that are listed as bisexual or guys that want to meet TG's. That's over half the women on this site already taken out of the equation. "

Wow, that leaves me with 40% of the pool and none that percentage live in London

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

And what is wrong with long hair on a man?

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

SW1A1AA

Why do you think you cant talk to women. Do you just mean when you fancy them or in general?

Just talk normally, i dont know if you standing next to a woman just pass an odd word. Dont make it the be all whether they are not interested. Why does it knock your confidence if a woman isnt interested

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A guy could send me a message asking what I had for breakfast that morning and provided he was tall, handsome and had a big dick I'd respond to him and have a conversation with a view to meeting.

I really don't think if matters what you say as your opening message if you physically match what that particular person is looking for.

If you break things down in percentages you could find that 30%of women don't like long hair on a guy or 30% don't want to meet guys that are listed as bisexual or guys that want to meet TG's. That's over half the women on this site already taken out of the equation.

Wow, that leaves me with 40% of the pool and none that percentage live in London "

Don't forget the ones you don't fancy and the ones that don't fancy you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im shit at talking to men, especially ones I fancy, I get all tongue tied and usually just walk off, flirting isn't my forte

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By *obyn GravesTV/TS
over a year ago

1127 walnut avenue

i can't talk to girls.. though this is purely down to the fact that i don't own a television set.. so have no knowledge of what's happening in eastenders.. big brother or coronation street..

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

SW1A1AA

You look like your into music thats an easy ice breaker everyone has an interest in music

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"And what is wrong with long hair on a man? "

In my opinion nothing, I quite like long hair on guys but surely you know, like everything not everybody will like it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I realised that even now at the age of 37 I'm still crap at talking to women, and I think it shows. I'm especially bad at talking to women on Fab as I don't really understand what is women want to hear/read. Tried being friendly and polite. Tried the dirty old fucker approach; 'alright darling, nice legs. What do they open etc. How do you prefer to be approached on Fab? "

I can xx.

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By *S RachaelTV/TS
over a year ago

Lowestoft


"you know of course that everyone is going to tell you to be yourself which is less than useless.

I have a confession. It's been several years since I've been in bed with a woman. Plenty of guys but they don't really do it for me like women. But my lifestyle precludes having a woman partner and I can't remember what it's like...and you develop a bit of a phobia.

Blimey what have iI said...

I'd be interested to know how your lifestyle precludes women. I've seen some pretty crazy set-ups in my time

lol, women run for miles if I say I'm a TV..they want a bloke and I am a bit girly in real life too.. and I need a woman who will buy into my dressing because Im not going to give it up, Rachael is a part of me and \i have loads and loads of clothes and wigs.

Most married TVs have a bin liner or something that they keep hidden - my stuff is all over my flat

do they run a mile when yer dressed as a girl.

personally I find women flock to me"

do you mean in real life? I get interest when Im dressed but I'm really talking about a relationship. I real life I have plucked eyebrows and I wear skinny jeans and I move like a woman and I get looks because of it. But I'm still a bloke, I'm not gay, if a lovely girl and a guy passed me I'd never look at the guy. The sexual partners I attract are pretty well all blokes and Ive got a bit afraid of trying to "get off" with a woman.

It's all a bit deep to get into here lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Im shit at talking to men, especially ones I fancy, I get all tongue tied and usually just walk off, flirting isn't my forte "

Me too, I can talk and talk and talk to skmeone I've met off here but meeting off here they've already expressed interest. In real life where I'm not sure if the guy finds me attractive, I can't bring myself to flirt.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just realised I have tried to give advise to someone when I have been on 1 date and only had sex 5 times in the last 12 months

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Im shit at talking to men, especially ones I fancy, I get all tongue tied and usually just walk off, flirting isn't my forte "

That's my problem too. I'm not a good flirt especially if it's expected of me, by me or someone else. I'm not even that good at smiling. Saw the same woman in Tesco twice yesterday, the second time I managed a smile but I think it looked more like I was trying to fart

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

We're not aliens or china dolls. Just talk to us like you'd talk to anyone else.

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By *S RachaelTV/TS
over a year ago

Lowestoft

by the way,

I imagine that's a bit like the OP is feeling...I imagine he's had some knocks and has lost his confidence...and it doesn't really matter how much we tell him to be confident. He needs to meet someone without sex involved but then the problem is how to move from platonic to sexual

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"by the way,

I imagine that's a bit like the OP is feeling...I imagine he's had some knocks and has lost his confidence...and it doesn't really matter how much we tell him to be confident. He needs to meet someone without sex involved but then the problem is how to move from platonic to sexual "

We all get knock backs though

You just have to dust yourself off and carry on

Nobodies for everybody, even those who think they are

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By *S RachaelTV/TS
over a year ago

Lowestoft


"Im shit at talking to men, especially ones I fancy, I get all tongue tied and usually just walk off, flirting isn't my forte

That's my problem too. I'm not a good flirt especially if it's expected of me, by me or someone else. I'm not even that good at smiling. Saw the same woman in Tesco twice yesterday, the second time I managed a smile but I think it looked more like I was trying to fart "

See OP, you're not alone. Loads of us are fucked up. Maybe that's why we are here and maybe that's why loads and loads of blokes are having sex with each other. Building relationships are soo soo hard.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Im shit at talking to men, especially ones I fancy, I get all tongue tied and usually just walk off, flirting isn't my forte

That's my problem too. I'm not a good flirt especially if it's expected of me, by me or someone else. I'm not even that good at smiling. Saw the same woman in Tesco twice yesterday, the second time I managed a smile but I think it looked more like I was trying to fart "

I'm not even any good at recognising people flirting with me, even in swinging clubs if guys come over to me and talk I just think they are being polite and talking to pass time till somebody they fancy comes alone

Loads of people are like you, you just have to be yourself either it will work or it won't and if being yourself don't work I'd say they aren't for you anyway because people who like you will like you for you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"you know of course that everyone is going to tell you to be yourself which is less than useless.

I have a confession. It's been several years since I've been in bed with a woman. Plenty of guys but they don't really do it for me like women. But my lifestyle precludes having a woman partner and I can't remember what it's like...and you develop a bit of a phobia.

Blimey what have iI said...

I'd be interested to know how your lifestyle precludes women. I've seen some pretty crazy set-ups in my time

lol, women run for miles if I say I'm a TV..they want a bloke and I am a bit girly in real life too.. and I need a woman who will buy into my dressing because Im not going to give it up, Rachael is a part of me and \i have loads and loads of clothes and wigs.

Most married TVs have a bin liner or something that they keep hidden - my stuff is all over my flat

do they run a mile when yer dressed as a girl.

personally I find women flock to me

do you mean in real life? I get interest when Im dressed but I'm really talking about a relationship. I real life I have plucked eyebrows and I wear skinny jeans and I move like a woman and I get looks because of it. But I'm still a bloke, I'm not gay, if a lovely girl and a guy passed me I'd never look at the guy. The sexual partners I attract are pretty well all blokes and Ive got a bit afraid of trying to "get off" with a woman.

It's all a bit deep to get into here lol"

OH,,not gay,,what not even bi,,i thought ALL tvs where bi despite what they say.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Polite normal topics whatever ypur interested. Musics a good one xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"you know of course that everyone is going to tell you to be yourself which is less than useless.

I have a confession. It's been several years since I've been in bed with a woman. Plenty of guys but they don't really do it for me like women. But my lifestyle precludes having a woman partner and I can't remember what it's like...and you develop a bit of a phobia.

Blimey what have iI said...

I'd be interested to know how your lifestyle precludes women. I've seen some pretty crazy set-ups in my time

lol, women run for miles if I say I'm a TV..they want a bloke and I am a bit girly in real life too.. and I need a woman who will buy into my dressing because Im not going to give it up, Rachael is a part of me and \i have loads and loads of clothes and wigs.

Most married TVs have a bin liner or something that they keep hidden - my stuff is all over my flat

do they run a mile when yer dressed as a girl.

personally I find women flock to me

do you mean in real life? I get interest when Im dressed but I'm really talking about a relationship. I real life I have plucked eyebrows and I wear skinny jeans and I move like a woman and I get looks because of it. But I'm still a bloke, I'm not gay, if a lovely girl and a guy passed me I'd never look at the guy. The sexual partners I attract are pretty well all blokes and Ive got a bit afraid of trying to "get off" with a woman.

It's all a bit deep to get into here lol

OH,,not gay,,what not even bi,,i thought ALL tvs where bi despite what they say."

And I was hoping they were

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

OP not sure what you're worried about, you seem fine

He sends perfectly nice messages.

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull


"And what is wrong with long hair on a man? "

Women's personal preferences, believe it or not they are allowed to prefer guys with muscles, 6 packs, beer bellies, skinny, fat etc it's there choice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Be relaxed and be yourself. Someone will like it.

If all else fails... Be like me lol

Work out which one of those lines was said tongue-in-cheek lol

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey


"Try the "fuck it,won't hurt trying" approach. If they don't want to talk to you what have you lost? When you find someone you have things in common with the conversation should flow. "

This

There is no set approach that works with me. Some people I just find it easy to chat with on here and others I don't.

With the right people it shouldn't be hard work.

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By *S RachaelTV/TS
over a year ago

Lowestoft


"you know of course that everyone is going to tell you to be yourself which is less than useless.

I have a confession. It's been several years since I've been in bed with a woman. Plenty of guys but they don't really do it for me like women. But my lifestyle precludes having a woman partner and I can't remember what it's like...and you develop a bit of a phobia.

Blimey what have iI said...

I'd be interested to know how your lifestyle precludes women. I've seen some pretty crazy set-ups in my time

lol, women run for miles if I say I'm a TV..they want a bloke and I am a bit girly in real life too.. and I need a woman who will buy into my dressing because Im not going to give it up, Rachael is a part of me and \i have loads and loads of clothes and wigs.

Most married TVs have a bin liner or something that they keep hidden - my stuff is all over my flat

do they run a mile when yer dressed as a girl.

personally I find women flock to me

do you mean in real life? I get interest when Im dressed but I'm really talking about a relationship. I real life I have plucked eyebrows and I wear skinny jeans and I move like a woman and I get looks because of it. But I'm still a bloke, I'm not gay, if a lovely girl and a guy passed me I'd never look at the guy. The sexual partners I attract are pretty well all blokes and Ive got a bit afraid of trying to "get off" with a woman.

It's all a bit deep to get into here lol

OH,,not gay,,what not even bi,,i thought ALL tvs where bi despite what they say."

oh, did I say Im not bi-?

We're into rainbow territory here. I don't really fancy blokes. I go with them and I love cock and I like sex with them (I love sex with them) but I fancy girls... a lot, I remember how wonderful a pussy feels and smells.

I hate any man putting an arm round my shoulders if we are sitting together because I do not want to feel protected or to give up my independance (manhood) in that way. Having said that I do sometimes look at a good looking bloke but I think that is a learned response rather than inbuilt.. It is complicated, isn't it.

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By *ub_liminalTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Belfast

[Removed by poster at 03/03/16 20:49:23]

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By *ub_liminalTVTV/TS
over a year ago

Belfast

There's no universal formula, just be yourself. If the recipient respondes to that positively then there's genuine compatibility and potential for more.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Hove, mainly…


"Im shit at talking to men, especially ones I fancy, I get all tongue tied and usually just walk off, flirting isn't my forte

That's my problem too. I'm not a good flirt especially if it's expected of me, by me or someone else. I'm not even that good at smiling. Saw the same woman in Tesco twice yesterday, the second time I managed a smile but I think it looked more like I was trying to fart "
. Haha that made me laugh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Be CONFIDENT women love it, look up a guy named corey Wayne on youtube"

That's your advice...REALLY????

Oh dear!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you can't be yourself, be batman!

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By *S RachaelTV/TS
over a year ago

Lowestoft


"If you can't be yourself, be batman! "

yes, this.

the confident blokes I see being most successful are completely unaware of their limitations.

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ


"You don't say 'show us ya minge' in a bar."

Ah, that's where I've been going wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would not take it to heart.

I'm absolutely crap at taking to women in real life. I still feel like a teenager, break out in a sweat and totally bottle it at the last minute. D'oh!

But here is also a very strange place.

Remember, there are literally hundreds of guys for every woman on here. Most of the messages you send will go unread, weather it's war and peace, Shakespeare, or, fancy a shag?

Those that do get through, well, there's so much choice, that the recipients, mostly, if its not exactly what they want, forget it.

I don't mean to be a downer though, quite the opposite, just, imagine being a lady on here!

All that said, if you just be yourself, be polite, be sane, and, a little wit helps, then when you do find someone to chat with, it's very, very worth it. There are some very smart women on here, and some very sexy ones too.

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

I suppose that a good way of speaking to women on fab would be to carefully read their profile. Do you think you fit their criteria? If it's specific and descriptive, you could build on what you read as a starting point when messaging them. It really helps if the profile clicks with you. If you use this approach as a B.S. tactic, you will be found out more often than not. If the profile has minimum information, that obviously makes things harder, as you have less to go on.

As to chatting in person, I'd repeat the mantra "be yourself". Never compromise yourself or try to act like someone you're not just for the sake of talking to someone. If there's one thing I've seen is that women in general like genuine, and not B.S. I feel the same, incedentally

Hope this helps.

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By *ed LipstickWoman
over a year ago

Fucksville

Read our profiles!

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By *ot40sCouple
over a year ago

birmingham


"Read our profiles!"

That is actually the best piece of advice so far !!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Obviously,I read people's profiles, no matter how incredibly longwinded some are but have to look for certain things. Some thing I can comment on that can be awarded with a reply. One woman called me lair about reading her profile after I'd done everything she said. Still, at least it was a conversation even it was me protecting my honour.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Don't treat women as women but as an individual person. That's whether you fancy them or not.

If you're wanting to get to know someone then not having a formula is better Imo. Treat and respond to me as the unique person that I am and I'll respect you for it. Even if you just want to shag me, I'll prefer it if I appreciate that it's me that's wanted.

If you respect someone then you can earn respect back. If we like each other, whilst getting along and building trust, then it can move to another level.

Confidence is a separate matter. And probably the subject of a different discussion. Though having all manner of relationships with women, friends or lovers, that are high quality relationships, is likely to build confidence.

I don't think that hammering your dick through a long list of women, just because you can pull them, is a strong foundation for confidence though. But only we each individually know the causes for our self-doubts etc.

Be a warm and open friend, the rest may follow.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm great at chatting women up. Shame I'm married to the only one I want

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Don't treat women as women but as an individual person. That's whether you fancy them or not.

If you're wanting to get to know someone then not having a formula is better Imo. Treat and respond to me as the unique person that I am and I'll respect you for it. Even if you just want to shag me, I'll prefer it if I appreciate that it's me that's wanted.

If you respect someone then you can earn respect back. If we like each other, whilst getting along and building trust, then it can move to another level.

Confidence is a separate matter. And probably the subject of a different discussion. Though having all manner of relationships with women, friends or lovers, that are high quality relationships, is likely to build confidence.

I don't think that hammering your dick through a long list of women, just because you can pull them, is a strong foundation for confidence though. But only we each individually know the causes for our self-doubts etc.

Be a warm and open friend, the rest may follow. "

Splendid advice.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thankfully I don't see myself as a player and not even good at making friends with people to be honest. At work I've stuck with my team despite the efforts of a few other people and there are women there I would like to get to know which is what kind of prompted this thread. Some look at me with total hatred which which fine if they've seen me and decided 'hell no' but I can't it help they're hot and I've found them attractive, I don't stare and/or leer. But it that kind of thing over the years that has put me off even trying. I thought with messaging women via various dating sites, and fab, would help boost my confidence.

Some good advise in this thread by the way.

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